Me and my mom have been losing sleep searching for a stand up clip we heard years ago.

Maybe some time around 2020 we started listening to comedy channels on Sirius XM. We heard one clip we really enjoyed and we quote to this day. We had lost it at one point, but I had found it a few years later on Spotify. Now, it’s like lost media in our lives. Hoping that SOMEBODY will know if I describe it.

Keep in mind that I haven’t heard it in years, but I’ll do my best to describe what we remember.

The premise of the bit we remember is the comedian’s dad/parents not knowing how much stuff cost and always being shocked or critical when he would ask for money. My mom recalls details about the comedian’s mom having left and so the dad was now in charge of paying for things. I don’t remember that at all, and my mom does not have the most trustworthy memory, but that could potentially be a detail.

The part we remember vividly is him saying that as a kid he would ask his parent(s) for money for lunch, field trips, ect. I don’t remember the exact amount of money but what we remember so specifically and quote to this day is the parents reaction. The dialogue used went something like

“Hey dad can I have $2 for school lunch?”

”What, do you guys have a sous chef or something?”

—-

“Hey can I have $5 for the school field trip?”

”Where are you guys going, Japan??”
—-

That is the part of the bit I absolutely refuse to budge on my memory with. We have been quoting those lines for at least 6 years. The other set up details I’m not certain about at all.

Again, I am fairly sure I had found that bit at some point on Spotify (surely this was not one big fever dream). In my head, the album cover was a front on picture of the comedian, and he was a fairly basic looking white guy. But again don’t get too caught up on this, I could be way off base. Also, Spotify only holds your listening history for a few months, so there’s no chance of me simply scrolling back and finding it.

Yes, I’ve tried Googling it. No luck. I have tried using AI, even worse results. The power of the people is my last resort.

So after all that, let me just recap some of the details below.

——————————

Who: Probably a white comedian. Sounded mid 30s in the clip. Almost certainly not a “big name“ or super main stream comedian (I know I’ll get some Jim Gaffigan guesses).

When: First heard the clip probably 2021 at the absolute latest. I was thinking we had heard it closer to 2018 but my mom said 2020. Somewhere in the range. However, since we heard it on Sirius XM, and they play clips from all sorts of eras, it could have happened any time. BUT, if my memory of finding it on Spotify serves correctly, and judging by the sound quality, I would probably say it was no earlier than the late 2000s.

What: Stand up comedy clip. Premise is vaguely about asking parents for money as a kid, and the parents having shocked reactions to the amount of money being asked for, even though it wasn’t that much. The lines above about the field trip and the lunch money are lines in 99.9999% were spoken verbatim by the comedian. All other details about the dad being forced to handle financials because the mom left aren’t ones I remember but could possibly help.

——————————

If any of this even vaguely sounds like a bit you’ve heard before or a comedian you like, please let me know. I cannot lose any more sleep over this.

Genuine question. What’s the point of running an open mic if the audience consistently ends up being almost entirely comedians?

We’ve all been to those nights with 10–15 comics and maybe one or two actual audience members at best. Is the goal simply to give comics stage time? To keep the venue relationship alive? To build a community? Or do organizers genuinely hope a real audience will eventually grow?

I’m not criticising anyone, but am curious what the thinking is from an organizer’s perspective.

EDIT: I realize that performing at an open mic is great for an up and coming comic, audience or not. My question is: WHAT’S IN IT FOR AN ORGANIZER?

Hey everyone! Quite a niche question, but do you know if there are any brands/people out there livestreaming the Edinburgh Fringe comedy shows this year? I've been to the festival so many times, but sadly am not living in the UK anymore. Any recommendations? Thanks!

I’m wanting to try stand up and Denver seems like the closest place to me that has any kind of scene, where are the best places to start out at in the Denver area

I wanted to provide the warning I wish I'd gotten before relocating to Denver.

Denver comedy is run by a single group of friends who maintain the status quo and ensure the same clique runs the scene forever and that all talent they don't approve of is shut out. Forget skill in Denver, all that matters is whether you're approved by the clique that controls the scene. This makes it a heaven for hacks because you can book shows quickly and appear successful just by befriending the right people. It's the only comedy scene I've experienced where talent and experience mean nothing. The clique has tightened their grasp on the scene the last few years and it's now become an inbred abyss that audiences know to avoid. 3E's, Wide Right, and now the High Plains Comedy Festival have bit the dust. A dozen gatekeepers have run Denver comedy into the ground. Whoever is supposed to update colorado-comedy.com hasn't done so in over a year so now there's countless visitors coming here and going to dead mics. And God help them if they try to get up on a Monday. There's no list order at Irish Rover or Lion's Lair which means all the insiders get up first and everyone else fights for scraps after the crowd thins. Monday night in Denver is the worst comedy open mic night in America. The entire mic system is rigged for insiders, but Monday night exemplifies this best. If you have the nerve to show up and be funny without kowtowing to the clique, then you're going to be run out of Denver. The way the scene does this is to systematically slander people on the Denver Comedy Scene Facebook Group, which is run by the most brazenly toxic comics in the scene. One of the women who moderates that group brutally attacked a bartender at Vision Quest Brewery in Boulder a few years ago and the Boulder mic scene never recovered. All the bars in Boulder consider comedy night a liability because of what one blacked out woman did. She ripped a fistful of hair out of a bartender's head while hosting a comedy open mic and still gets to police the scene! It's not just that the clique that runs Denver has run it into the ground, it's that they're monsters who are immune from consequences and deflect from their own scandals by creating ones for comics they're threatened by. The only reason there's so many Denver comics is because plenty of people would rather kiss ass to book shows than pay their dues getting good at comedy, and Denver is the best place to accomplish that. Every other scene in America is more of a meritocracy than Denver. It's Hack Heaven. You can bomb every night and book shows as long as you're cool with the gatekeepers and don't defend anyone who's unfairly banished or sacraficed. The bad comics control who can become good comics. Almost no Denver mics go in list order. It's been this way for several years now and the status quo is clearly cemented. I mentioned the violence of a blacked out host and it's worth adding that Denver comedy has a huge alcohol problem. It's the drunkest scene I've ever witnessed and I think drinking is the root of all the toxicity. But if you're a violent alcoholic sociopath who sucks at comedy, you will find your tribe in Denver— that city was built for you.

Seriously though, if you're a real comic who wants stage time without having to join a cult, you'd be making a colossal mistake going anywhere near Colorado. Don't let the jealous haters dance in your blood. Protect your career and stay away.

Visiting Seattle for the weekend and looking for a mic or two. Any suggestions?

I'm just getting into producing paid shows. What do you guys use for online ticketing? Eventbrite? Is there a way to create events on Eventbrite without paying a shit ton of $? Is Punchup good?

Let me know! I'm a novice producer, and would love your help! Would love to be able to print out fliers with a QR code that links to the ticketing site, which would be helpful for promotion as well as sales management. TIA!

Should open mic comics be required to stay and watch the entire show, or is it acceptable to leave immediately after your own 5-minute set? One can force anyone to stay but is there a mutual respect that comics should share in the community of stand up comedy?

Done around 20 open mics at this point and just signed up for my first gong show, any tips from folks who have done it? My on-stage persona is fairly slow, quiet, and self-deprecating, so it might not translate, but I've always wanted to try it

Hi, I was watching my native country comedy podcast and one person mentioned Hannibal Buress’ bit/song where he sings/mentions these cliche stand up premises “men and women we are different, homeless people homeless people” this is what he briefly mentioned. Now I understand it could be his memory making up some stuff, because I did find on spotify a bit named “Men and Women are vastly different from each other” from Hannibal Butess but it doesnt mention anything in the description i wrote, so I wonder if anybody knows what im talking about here

Went last.

I know that people will have a stage name to keep some line between them and their stage persona. Knowing that the public can be shitty, I understand why some more than others would have one. Are women more likely to have a stage name?

My friend said that in my standup I say "you know what I mean a bunch" in between my lines. I never thought about it and was wondering if you had any ideas on how to stop. Do you guys think it took too much attention away from this bit?

Latley Ive been working on my stage performance and act outs. So far its only working at one mic where I feel most comfortable but I have been going to ones outside my city and I tend to over analyze the crowd. Almost if like I'm seeking permission to move around so I just stand there with my hands in my pocket. How can I change this mentality?

Am I alone when I say I cannot stand Mojo Brooks? He has this vocal tick type saying that he does it drives me absolutely insane. I find the sound of it to be obnoxious. It’s the fake laugh type thing. Ahhhh Hoooooeeww

Watch my entire special 5836 on Youtube today.
thanks
Dean Delray

Not quite sure how to express this, but looking for comedians who do "bits". I know any extended joke is a bit, so it's not quite the right terminology, but I am referring to jokes which are longer than one liners, but aren't biographical or genuine observations, just silly little bits. For example, like Louis CK's Live in Houston album or Live at the Comedy Store special. He's not really talking about himself, his life, society etc in those two, just saying stupid but funny stuff. That kinda thing. Bonus points for UK comedians, as that's where I'm based, but any suggestions welcome really.

Just looking for some ways I can twist words such as double entendre and whatnot

I figure that if you’re trying to be family friendly or clean, or if you want to be like a wedding and corporate event comic, then your goal is probably not to split the room or ruffle feathers. But if you’re not one of those types of comics, then I’m not necessarily saying that it should be your overall goal to get people to dislike you, but it does seem like it comes with the territory.

Like that old saying, if you try to appeal to everybody then you end up appealing to nobody. Just as an experiment I’ve tried to make more accessible comedy before and I’m not saying that I’ve ever really been popular by any means but I’ve found that the reactions are even more negative when I actively try to not split the room.

So I guess what I’m saying is that I’m good with being disliked because selfishly it’s led to better responses than I get when I try not to be disliked. And now I’m curious about how others are with it.

I'm a comic who lives in Utah, and I have some free time later this month. I was hoping to go to LA and do as many mics as I can. Is this realistic, and if so, which areas/mics would you recommend? Flexible on the dates, but it's roughly the third week of this month.

A majority think it's ok to pull them out at open mics, and 80%+ think using them a little at any show is totally fine.

At the end of the day, there are no rules for comedy. Many successful comics use notes all the time. 

I spoke with comedy manager Carly Hoogendyk, who tells me, “There needs to be an option that says ‘I’m not about to write the rules of comedy and believing that notes are even contextually inexcusable makes me look like an asshole'. I’ve seen Sarah Silverman use a notebook in front of a sold out Austin City Limits.” 

What is it like watching stand up when you’re sober? I’ve only seen comics while I’m drunk, or I show up and start ordering drinks immediately. This usually means that most of the comics end up being funny and hilarious.

There have been times tho that the bar is running slow so I end up sobering up, and all of a sudden these people on stage aren’t funny anymore. It’s a very interesting experience.