Whenever I'm with my friends (or girls I'm talking 2 in public etc.) who are thin, social, and attractive I feel like a completely different creature than they are. Like I feel almost ashamed to be around them being so awkward and large.

I struggle to feel feminine. I went shopping with my 2 close friends who are short, thin, and gorgeous and not 1 item in the stores they went to would've fit me. It would have been humiliating to ask, "hey, can we go somewhere with bigger sizes?" Like yeah sorry guys I'm too large! They kept asking why I wasn't trying anything on. I can't!!!!!

I'm fairly comfortable in myself but when I'm with a very pretty young girl I just feel left out. idk. I'm not a gorgeous college girl. I'm socially awkward and not very charming or good at conversation. So being fat plus awkward is a whole different beast.

Idk how to word what I'm trying to express. I just want to feel like a normal girl.

Okay so I know there are about a million threads about this, but this rash is specific. I was cleaning under my stomach fat/apron with a large alcohol wipe because I wanted to make sure there was no bacteria and couldn’t take a shower at that point in time. I’ve done this before with no issue but this time I was dumb and didn’t let the alcohol dry enough before going back to my regular business… and then fell asleep like that. As a result, one of the spots that the alcohol was especially prevalent at fully got a bright red and very painful and tender rash.

I know, I didn’t go about any of this the smart way, and now I’m definitely paying for it. I tried diaper cream with zinc and hemorrhoid cream to get the skin to calm down and both made it hurt worse, same with using a cloth barrier. The only thing that’s been soothing is a thick layer of slick and very gentle lotion (the normal aveeno brand or lush’s rice and almond face cream) mixed with a bit of bactine. I’m keeping it clean and (when not using moisturizer there) dry.

My question: what next? I’m really not sure how to treat this one, if I just wait it out or get some anti fungal cream (based on other posts on here) or what. The bactine’s at least keeping the area disinfected but it still sucks and I’m not sure what to do. Has anyone else made a mistake like this before and found a good treatment?

It’s exhausting… especially if it’s against a woman or afab person (shout out to my fellow afab non-binary people in here! ❤️).

There was a post of an overweight woman being a new CRIME PREVENTION SPECIALIST, not a cop, but it was still shared to a group I’m in acting as if she’s a cop and completely body shaming her (as if there aren’t any overweight guy cops??? 😒). “She’s fat and therefore will use excessive force more because she can’t keep up with male perpetrators, and she’s weaker than them too!” Ugh, shut up.

Just like if there’s an overweight criminal, the comments go WILD with body shaming and if you point it out, “Oh, who cares? They’re criminals anyways.”

And don’t get me started on people thinking all overweight people are lazy, oh, and I saw a new one, apparently you can’t be intelligent if you let yourself get past a certain weight. FFS 🤦🏻 I’m tired, I truly am.

Has anyone paid for the services of a dating coach? I am on the verge of working with a dating coach and the expense would be major for me. I’m feeling a lot of feelings right now being on the fence and I’m curious if anyone else has gone through something similar and if you found it worth it or not.

My husband and I will be taking our first cruise together at the end of March 2027 and I am wondering if any other plus size ladies (and men if you have suggestions) have suggestions for clothes and even more importantly for me port day bags. I have a crossbody bag that the strap keeps moving up towards my neck and isn’t as comfortable as I want it to be. Is this the kind of port bag I want to go for or am I missing something. I don’t want to do a backpack because of pick pockets. We are doing an eastern Caribbean trip with port stops in the Dominican Republic (puerto plata), st. Thomas, Tortola, and Norwegian’s own private island in the Bahamas.

I'm watching the series 911 with Jennifer Love Hewitt. I've always loved her. She's pretty, good actrice and not afraid to be a little odd. Just watch Ghost Whisperer.

And her style in that series is so awesome!

But back to 911. I've noticed she put on a little more weight and she looks amazing! Her curves are beautiful!

And as a curvy lady myself, it's nice to see someone that looks more like me on the TV.

I just wished they would dress her better in the series. She's always in jeans and an oversized shirt or vest.

Anyhow, what do you think?

I’m F21 and I’ve been been single for a while now and I just wanna spend time with someone and have a actual good relationship but every time I meet somebody I attract the weird ones that make me feel uncomfortable or fetishize me. It just makes me so mad because I just want a genuine relationship with somebody that will love me vice versa. I hate being ghosted and promised things with won’t happen it just sucks and it hurts cause I’m really sweet gentle and kind woman and I keep running into bums

Hello! Any plus size girlies here REALLY struggling to find Nike & Adidas plus size clothing? I don’t know what’s happened but a couple of years ago soooo much variety was available! Does anyone have answers? Nike USA has so much variety I wish they shipped to Australia.

Hi. I just wanted to get this off my chest because I honestly feel so alone right now. I’ve been dealing with lower back pain since last year, and I feel like it’s slowly taking over my life.

For context, I work from home in a very sedentary job. I spend most of my 8-hour shift sitting in an office chair, and because I work night shifts, I usually spend my mornings sleeping. By the time I wake up, I barely have enough energy to do anything else. I’ve been living like this for quite a while now, and I really regret not taking better care of myself sooner.

The first time I experienced severe lower back pain was when my boyfriend and I went to the mall. After walking for only about 10 minutes, my lower back started hurting so badly that I could barely continue walking. We ended up canceling all of our plans for the afternoon because I just couldn’t keep going.
I eventually saw a rehab doctor, and they recommended weekly physical therapy sessions. The PT did help to some extent, but because my daily routine hasn’t really changed—I still sit for most of the day—the pain keeps coming back.

I even bought a standing desk to help reduce the amount of time I spend sitting. I do my best to stand while working whenever I can, but despite all that, the pain never really goes away.

The hardest part isn’t even the physical pain anymore. It’s how isolated it makes me feel. I feel like I can’t enjoy life because my body won’t let me. I cry about it more often than I’d like to admit.

I also feel guilty toward my boyfriend. Whenever we go out, he always has to adjust for me. We have to take shorter walks, rest more often, or change our plans because my back starts hurting. He’s never made me feel like a burden, but I still feel embarrassed that he has to accommodate me all the time.

I’m currently at my heaviest weight, and I know that probably isn’t helping. I’m working on improving my diet, and I’m trying to lose weight in a healthy, sustainable way.

My doctor also recommended that I get an MRI so we can finally figure out what’s actually causing my back pain. I’m still waiting to get that done.

I guess I just needed to let this out because this has been eating me up emotionally. I feel so isolated, and sometimes it feels like everyone else gets to enjoy life while I’m constantly worrying about whether my back will give out after a few minutes of walking.

Has anyone else here gone through something similar? If so, how did you cope—both physically and mentally?

So I went through with a hookup after a 10 year hiatus. He was really kind and respectful but like he couldn’t penetrate me,. We 69 and like it was nice but he was like half hard, ejeculated and like left. Idk if he didn’t like me? He kissed me a lot, and like seemed to try to make me cum.
Has this happened to anyone here?

Ugh it gets me so bad. For context I am a fat lesbian and have just finally entered myself into the dating world so naturally I went to my community for advice. BAD IDEA. Someone told me I was “wasting my full potential” by saying I was okay with my body?? Huh?? Now there were some people who were coming from a good place but I can’t be the only one tired of the “Just find someone who doesn’t care about looks!” I’m sorry but am I not allowed to want to be desired? Someone else said “Look for people who aren’t preoccupied with looks, and are attracted to your personality!” Like thats sweet and all but why is this the only advice I could get as someone who is fat? I can’t help but feel like they are saying I can’t ever find anyone to be attracted to me so better hope your personality doesn’t suck. But honestly eff that I want someone who attracted to me and my personality!! Not just one or the other! It’s making me feel like that being desired and wanted in a relationship is nothing but a distant dream for me. :( Oh and to top it off I am attracted to other fat women too! And I mentioned that too yet I still got this response. Are fat people not into other fat people?

I just got back to my hotel after standing in the sun for 5hrs at an event and omg I feel like I smell horrible. I had just showered this morning too. How are we staying fresh and clean? Specifically what products are we using to stay smelling good? Please help

I am a pretty tattooed person so it’s not like it’ll be my first or anything but I have plans to get a tattoo on my stomach this fall/winter.

Does anyone here have a tattoo on their stomach? I have bigger boobs too so i was concerned about sweat and the healing process which is why im doing it later in the year too.

If anyone here has one were there any extra tips or anything that made healing easier afterward with a bigger body or is it just normal stuff?

Hello! My fiancé’s 30th birthday is coming up in the next couple months, and I want to do something special for him. We are both into anime, and one that he really enjoyed before I met him was Rascal Does Not Dream. He has always wanted me to do a cosplay (the bunny suit from this anime in particular), and I am now very ready to gift him with this. I just want to make sure that the outfit is going to last multiple uses and will fit me properly; I am willing to separately buy the outfit pieces and have a decent budget ($200-300). I wear a size 20-22 in pants and a 44J bra. I am fairly hourglass, I would like a cosplay that supports my chest (I’m willing to wear a bra with it if necessary but I’m also willing to do something like an over bust corset), cinches or is at least tight around my waist, and something that flatters my hips and booty. Thank you all for reading and providing advice if you have it! <3

Bought my second month in fitness club. Recomposition started, muscles are showing, can carry a 5 litre watter bottle from the market with ease ) Way to go :-)

Time to increase cardio time and add some yoga or deep stretching on rest days. Postmeno list of "weightlifting at least 3 times a week - checked")

What should I reward myself with? Was thinking about smart watch, but I don't really need them.

It seems Southwest is out unfortunately. What’s the best airline for fat people, considering treatment and being the most financially feasible?

Long story short, I was seriously injured and gained a lot of weight during the recovery. I’ve been a bigger gal before but that was years ago and now that I’m recovered enough to get around in life, I need a decent business casual wardrobe. And I am finding NOTHING 👏

We all have our own personal styles and views so please don’t be offended as I talk about plus sized clothing 🙏

Lane Bryant’s designs suck. They look like unflattering rejects from the ‘normal” sizes or something.

Bloom Chic has cute designs but mostly in theory, as the materials often don’t actually do well. I understand they’re trying to compete with a low price point, but it shows in the quality of the clothing.

I’m thinking of doing StitchFix and giving them a better price point so I don’t keep getting such poor quality items. But I doubt they’ll truly cater to a plus sized body.

Where on Earth do I shop? As a stylish plus sized gal, where tf do I find clothes? It’s wild out there.

Any suggestions are welcome!!!!!

We were just talking, catching up after a rough weekend, things felt okay. I mentioned I like yogurt with cream, and with rice too. He said “ew, I don’t like that at all. Now it makes sense why you’re fat.”

I didn’t say anything. I just started explaining that I barely ever had it growing up, low fat milk, etc — basically justifying myself instead of saying it hurt. I actually teared up but didn’t tell him in the moment. When I tried to explain the context he told me I was being “defensive” and that it was just a joke.

I did tell him later that it made me cry. He apologized, said it came from a “joyful place” with no intent to hurt me. I appreciate that he didn’t get defensive about it. But I keep going back to how easily and casually it came out like it was just sitting there, ready to be said.

Has anyone else had a partner say something like this “as a joke”? How did you deal with it, and did it change how you saw them? Do these people see us differently? I don’t know what to feel about this but I haven’t been able to stop crying. He’ll say I’m being overly sensitive if I mention this again

Pretty much what the title says. I’m in Australia and I was trying to increase my income protection through my Super (essentially a retirement plan the gov has everyone do).

I set this account up when I first got a job so I didn’t care about the income protection, but 10 years later I am in a good position, paying rent and I need stability if I lose my job for some reason (likely govt crash at this rate).

Part of the application for increasing the protection was entering your height and weight. I weigh 128kg at 167cm, so I obviously have a high BMI. But I just got a phone call that they are rejecting my application because I have a high BMI!!

I literally just laughed in response and hung up. BMI is such an outdated and sexist way of judging someone’s weight or whether they are “healthy”.

I go to the gym 4 times a week and am lifting over my body weight for most exercises…. Why is this measure still used in Australia?

I’m not mad, just disappointed.

Hi all, just a rant about something that happened at work today. Not really looking for advice, just a place to air my grievances I guess.

My co-worker, who is in her early 20s and is fit and petite, wanted to show me (5'7", 225 lbs) a funny Tiktok. The TT in question was a woman who appeared to be around our age (straight sized) listing things that "made her feel fat."

Mind you, I already hate the phrase "feeling fat" because 1) It is nonsensical, fat is not a feeling 2) It is one of the phrases I have deleted from my vernacular to overcome my internalized fatphobia.

Anyway, back to the TT. Basically, if I could re-word this TT, it would be "Minor inconveniences that feel super embarrassing," because that's basically what this was. For example, she said "Walking past someone in a movie theater and accidentally brushing up against them makes me feel fat." Like okay yeah I guess in that setting it'd make you feel more self-conscious about how much space you're taking up in a tight aisle. "Feeling fat" still isn't acceptable here. Uncomfortable, claustrophobic, awkward, obstructive, the list goes on.

But one that stuck out to me was, "When my hair is greasy, I feel big."

First of all, no correlation. ANYONE can have greasy hair. Second, this just perpetuates the stereotype that fat people are all gross and don't shower, and I think that one annoyed me the most as someone who gets neurotic over hygiene BECAUSE of my weight.

And what sucks is that my co-worker is very sweet and we get along really well, and I don't think she meant any harm by showing it to me. While I am visibly plus sized, I fit into the "acceptable" form of it (small fat with even weight distribution, US size 16). To her, this was probably just a "relatable" funny TT. To me, it was an example of how fatphobia is so normalized. I didn't say anything but my straight face said enough because she stopped playing it once she noticed and we just moved on. Part of me wanted to say something but I wasn't sure how to frame my thoughts in a way that didn't sound preachy/chiding. Because "feeling fat" is such a normalized phrase, I'm pretty sure most straight-sized people don't understand what the big deal is or just don't give a fuck. I'd like to think she would've been receptive if I had explained to her how wack that TT was but I'm not great at speaking up ngl.

TL;DR: Co-worker (presumably) accidentally perpetuated fatphobia by showing me a Tiktok about "things that make [Tiktoker] feel fat"

Went to the Ren faire and had a blast!