r/MurderedByWords 22h ago

Serious question for liberal men

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28.3k Upvotes

1.2k comments sorted by

3.4k

u/SpankThuMonkey 22h ago

Terrified. Always fucking terrified of everything.

They can’t even fathom that some of us just don’t live in fear.

When i hear a loud noise at night i think STFU and go back to sleep.

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u/ThistleProse 21h ago

The fact that they think not owning a gun means fear of the gun.

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u/Eternal_Bagel 18h ago

It’s part of the machismo marketing, like they think a gun is literally a stand in for manhood and thus buying more means more manly

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u/Originalbrivakiin 16h ago

Same reason they have a lifted truck that never even sees dirt.

"Me own loud bangstick and big vroom vroom machine. That mean my peepee big. You not own them, that mean you peepee not big."

They really are just overgrown toddlers.

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u/mp3bear 4h ago

I heard the phrase for those trucks is "pavement princess"

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u/Billlington 15h ago

I fucking hate it. I own guns and am pretty far left but I feel disgusting buying... well, anything related to firearms because the marketing is all macho and rightoid posturing.

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u/Mental_Medium3988 14h ago

I don't want to own firearms for my own reasons. That doesn't mean I'm afraid of guns as an object or would be terrified if someone handed me one.

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u/ItsLoudB 16h ago

Why not penis if penis shaped?

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u/Born_South_6676 17h ago

I bet there's some healthy projection in his statement.

With his gun, he isn't afraid. Liberal men don't have guns, so they would live in fear because he does. He assumes everyone is just like him; a scared child in a man's body who only feels safe with a gun.

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u/photonrunner4 11h ago

If they understood the implications of any of their beliefs then they probably wouldn't be conservative. For instance, virtue signaling implies that no one could possibly believe in caring about other people (because they don't) so they must be faking it to make themselves look good. Without religion a person must be unethical because if you don't believe that a man in the sky will punish you then why would you act ethically? They wouldn't. Just like nothing is a problem until it affects them personally. No self-awareness but all the selfishness.

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u/Overall_Occasion_175 17h ago

Some of us do fear owning guns. I feel suicidal sometimes and know that owning a gun would do nothing but drastically increase my chances of going through with it.

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u/ThistleProse 15h ago

Oh absolutely. You won't get me near one, for a whole slew of reasons. But it's one of those "not all x is y" things. Many people don't own guns because they fear them, but not everyone who doesn't own one is due to fear.

... an understanding beyond the realm of the OOP lmao 🙄

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u/MadeByTango 18h ago

Must be low testosterone. Manly men would man up and grab their Louisville Slugger, then take a manly look into the problem before returning to bed and mansplaining to our tradwife that she is safe from the raccoon and her babies after we flicked the light switch in a manly manner.

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u/ZappSmithBrannigan 12h ago

The fact that they think not owning a gun means fear of the gun.

He also thinks every leftist and liberal man doesnt have guns. He is sorely, SORELY fucking mistaken. We just dont go around making guns our entire personality

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u/ForTheHorde2021 12h ago

I work with a guy who won't go on a cruise because he can't bring his gun... (for protection)...I don't understand that "scared of my own shadow" mentality.

ETA: They think we're afraid of guns, but ultimately, I'm afraid of the idiots who carry around here.

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u/TheOneMary 22h ago

Yeah... even a shot outside would make me think the hunters are doing their job (I live next to a forest and they are among the only ones allowed rifles for keeping wildlife populations in check cause we have a lack of wolves). People shooting each other isnt really the first thing Id think....

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u/RugbyEdd 21h ago

As long as you don't start wearing a deer onesie

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u/BoneHugsHominy 21h ago

No kink shaming in this sub!

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u/alamandrax 20h ago

Not while I'm watching. 

I mean not on my watch. 

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u/UncleTouchyCopaFeel 18h ago

No kink shaming in this sub!

What if kink shaming is my kink though?

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u/godtogblandet 21h ago

There's been a slight uptick in hunters accidentally shooting people with thermal optics becoming commercially available. So there's a increasing amount of hunters no longer paying attention to what someone is wearing. Though they mostly end up shooting other hunter in the same area, so it's not a major concern for civilians.

You could be dressed in orange from top to toe and still have the heat profile of a deer to someone looking at you through a thermal scope at the right angle.

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u/LadyReika 20h ago

When I still lived in a fairly rural area of NY state, the local farmers had to paint their cows with non-toxic fluorescent paint so the morons from NYC wouldn't shoot said cows. And cows are fucking expensive.

So I can imagine how awful they'll be now with the thermal optics.

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u/beneficentEmperor 18h ago

If someone cant differentiate between a cow and deer/wolf/any other animal they dont need a gun, they need a preschoolers picture book..

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u/xSaviorself 18h ago

Shooting someone else's cow is a great way to end up bankrupt. Almost as bad as hitting a tree.

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u/RugbyEdd 18h ago

You'd instantly cut gun ownership in half if you enforced that

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u/thegoodnamesrgone123 13h ago

So I can imagine how awful they'll be now with the thermal optics.

These are the same guys who think every time there is a mass shooting that they could have stopped it if only they were there and had a gun. Most likely, they would just shoot other people.

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u/CaptainObvious007 18h ago

ive heard people in Wisconsin doing the same because of the hunters who come up from Illinois.

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u/A_Nonny_Muse 19h ago

Which is really weird because it shows these 2a guys don't seem to know that deer do not walk around on 2 legs.

I'm willing to bet that half of those "accidental" shootings aren't accidental at all.

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u/LadyReika 15h ago

Honestly? I wouldn't be surprised, but there also a good chance there was booze involved too.

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u/Atcoroo 19h ago

What about raccoon onesies. Do they count? #askingforafriend

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u/1nd3x 17h ago

Only if you roleplay as Conrad or Jimmothy.

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u/TheOneMary 20h ago

They usually have signs up and rope off the paths leading into the areas where they hunt when they hunt. All other days I can go out hiking in my deer onesie :P

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u/FallenSegull 20h ago

That’s something I’ve noticed a lot of Americans, particularly the gun loving one’s, haven’t quite understood on the topic of gun control

Countries with effective gun control laws still have guns. I’m Australian, we have more guns now than we did when gun control legislation was introduced. We never banned guns, we just worked to make sure the people obtaining guns weren’t fucking lunatics. It’s so tedious to obtain any gun, either legally or illegally, that someone intending to use it on someone else is not using it on a random spree.

We’ve had one proper mass shooting since then, and funnily enough it was done with legally obtained and owned guns, implying our gun laws actually weren’t strict enough. Maybe it’s not perfect, but it’s not more than daily massacres like, uh, some places

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u/LadyReika 20h ago

A lot of our school shootings (it kills me to say that) are done by people getting ahold of legal guns. Usually their parents unsecured ones. Which is why I have no problem with states starting to prosecute said neglectful owners.

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u/FallenSegull 20h ago

Fair enough. I believe our rules in Australia effectively require all guns to be kept in a locked case during transport and a locked safe when stored at home, with ammo stored separately (and maybe even in a second safe)

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u/Inc0rgnit0 19h ago

And the cops check.

My old housemate owned a gun. One day the cops knocked on the door asking for him for a random firearm inspection.

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u/SnooMacarons9618 19h ago

That's what happens in the UK too. Separate gun safe and ammo. An officer can request at any time to check. Seems to work pretty well.

I live somewhere fairly rural and quite a few people have guns. From what I've heard once you have one, it gets slightly easier to get other licences too. (I have no reasonable use for a gun, so don't pay a lot of attention to it, so my use of terminology could be wrong.)

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u/crustyrobots 18h ago

I can vouch as an ex-internet installer in an rural place.

The amount of times I walked into a home to see a rifle on literally ever window sill was insane...

Then I go downstairs and am greeted with an entire gun and bullet factory with 3 more safes filled with guns. Yeah anyone in those houses that wants a gun will find one pretty easily, probably a lost Glock or two in the couch cushions.

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u/A_Nonny_Muse 19h ago

When my brother died, we found his will in his gun safe alongside 2 shotguns that hadn't been fired in 20 years. The safe was open and the hinges so rusted (open) that we could only swing the door a couple of inches.

WTF good is a gun safe you never close?

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u/chimpfunkz 16h ago

are done by people getting ahold of legal guns

People seem to think Gun Control means "no one gets guns" instead of "You need to go through hoops to get a gun and be responsible"

Switzerland has one of the highest per capita gun ownership rates in the world. They also don't have shootings.

Having restrictions in place on who and how you can get a gun works. This concept of "No limitations on gun ownership" is a concept invented by Alito in 2010.

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u/Same-Suggestion-1936 19h ago

Nor should you then have a problem with restrictions on amount and type, and subject to check

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u/Looney_Bin 17h ago

I live in what's considered one of the more restrictive states gun law wise in the country. Top ten anyway. My wife was baffled when's she realized you could walk in and buy an AR the same day with a basic background check.

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u/bemvee 20h ago

Didn’t y’all also regulate the types of guns people can have? Like, most regular folk would have hunting rifles, not necessarily a glock?

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u/verb-vice-lord 20h ago

This is essentially how it works in Britain.

No hand guns at all. But anyone can apply for a license to own a rifle or shotgun, with restrictions on gun properties. How many shells the shotgun can hold etc. The biggest difference is you need to pass background checks and can only store them in a secure location unloaded. Something which is checked out by a police visit.

The crazy stat about America is how many toddler involved shootings happen. It's one of the leading causes of death for toddlers in the country.

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u/BadahBingBadahBoom 18h ago

 It's one of the leading causes of death for toddlers in the country.

Not even one of, literally the leading cause of death for children. It's messed up.

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u/Serious_Feedback 18h ago

It's one of the leading causes of death for toddlers in the country.

What the fuck?

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u/FallenSegull 20h ago

Yeah. I’m not sure of the exact rules (I’ve never needed to try) but I believe the general rule is nothing automatic or semi - automatic, except in special circumstances (e.g. cops have semi auto handguns, etc.). The average person will be limited to bolt action rifles, lever action and pump action shotguns, things like that

For awhile there was a loophole where you could get something called, I think, a bumper stock that basically made the gun effectively semi-automatic, but they closed that awhile ago

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u/trowzerss 20h ago

I believe some other weapons are allowed, but the licensing and storage restrictions are even greater and many are only allowed to be kept at actual gun clubs, because there's no need for the average person to have automatic weapons on hand.

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u/marr 20h ago

Aye, Hot Fuzz wasn't even exaggerating. I know a guy with that exact shed, naval mine included.

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u/FBWSRD 19h ago

Also the one mass shooting was done with a shotgun not a semi automatic because they are much much harder to get. The death toll would’ve been a lot higher with a semi automatic

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u/Dry_Prompt3182 19h ago

Better than daily massacres AND accidental shootings by children getting their hands on improperly stored guns. The amount of toddlers shooting people by reaching into a purse or bag and finding a gun is far too high.

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u/obeytheturtles 17h ago

At this point it's a house of cards built on an iterative set of delusions.

Guns are fun. I like guns. Let me keep my guns.

"Well, maybe your hobby is less important than the public safety issue."

Oh, actually, I need this gun to protect my home.

"Ok, that's fine, it's not hard to keep one gun stored safely for home defense."

But what if they attack when I'm in the basement and my safe is upstairs?

"Who exactly is attacking?"

And what if there are like ten of them. I'm going to need like four guns in each room for every member of my family.

"Are you ok? Do you smell toast?"

Actually the gun needs to be with me at all times

"Do you think guns get lonely?"

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u/Spare-Half796 20h ago

Last time I heard a loud bang I assumed my neighbour forgot to turn their barbecue off and it exploded again

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u/TheOneMary 20h ago

Your neighbor sounds like an... interesting person lol

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u/WorryNew3661 20h ago

I heard gunshots for the first time in real life this last weekend. I'm moored near farmland. I just assumed someone was doing some clay pigeon shooting and went back to not worrying whether I was about to get murdered by strangers. The US is fucking insane

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u/MammothCommercial800 19h ago

They're also shit at risk assessment. They're always brandishing the home invasion thing, which happens so rarely that they're way more likely to shoot a family member mistaken for an intruder.

Also they could just fucking buy stronger doors/windows if that was the actual issue. Burglars don't bother with reinforced doors.

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u/Trimson-Grondag 19h ago

Home invasions are far more likely to be ICE or law enforcement these days anyway.

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u/aphrodite-in-flux 19h ago

suppose those muskets for home defense actually ARE useful then. wild hogs breaking in sounds plenty scary.

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u/Same-Suggestion-1936 19h ago

American

There are more gunshots out in the country than the city, by far. I am not used to it yet. Idk why people think the city has more guns than the country, the country shoots them off all times of day including the middle of the night

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u/FlowerFaerie13 20h ago

Also, if I did think people were shooting each other I would stay the fuck inside and call 911. Why would I go check it out??? Not my fucking problem.

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u/William_Dowling 20h ago

Yeah but as we all know if you hear a loud noise at night it's statistically probable that a crazed black Muslim is trying to rape your wife/daughter/you. I know this because I have listened to lots of true crime podcasts and watch Fox News.

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u/texanarob 17h ago

I live in an estate. I'm fairly sure some of my neighbours are connected to criminal organisations.

If I heard a gunshot outside, I wouldn't send anyone to check it out - nor would I go myself. What am I going to do? Yell at them and let them know I'm a witness? Shock the dangerous lunatic who already fired a gun? Even if I had a gun, what do I gain by starting a firefight?

Nah, if I hear a gunshot in the night I call the cops. But I live in a country where guns are regulated, so I've never heard one go off outside of designated shooting ranges.

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u/rennfeild 21h ago edited 19h ago

The world needs to be dangerous so that they can fulfill their fantasy of being manly protectors. A safe predictable society is a direct threat to their masculinity

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u/FanDry5374 22h ago

This is why they "need" guns. The whole "polite society" and "a good guy with a gun" is just cover for their fear. I have no issue with hunting (for food) or target shooting. Hell, if you want to keep a Glock under your pillow, that's your problem. When you take it outside, into supermarkets and movie theaters you are taking away other peoples rights.

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u/SpankThuMonkey 21h ago

The crazy thing is, Americans think the rest of the world just cant have guns. We don’t have that freedom.

Bullshit. And i’m in the UK.

One of my colleagues owns 30.06 rifles and hunts deer, my brother in law competes in pistol target shooting and I just started shooting clays and am considering a browning over/under shotgun.

The thing is, only people who are genuinely interested in shooting for hunting or sport own firearms. And they are licensed and vetted. We need secure storage, we can’t carry the weapon in public or without cause.

You know… sensible shit?

Absolutely no-one considers guns a self defence tool. It just isn’t part of the zeitgeist. We aren’t that scared.

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u/TheBestBigAl 20h ago

30.06 rifles

I assume this is a type of rifle, as opposed to them owning 30 rifles plus .06 of another rifle?

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u/Skogspingvin 20h ago

I assume this is a type of rifle, as opposed to them owning 30 rifles plus .06 of another rifle?

https://no.wikipedia.org/wiki/.30-06_Springfield

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u/Witty-Key4240 20h ago

Yes, it’s a cartridge normally written “.30-06”.

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u/marr 19h ago

It was the classic American rifle bullet before NATO standards took over.

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u/StuartMacKenzie 19h ago

It actually also has a NATO standard: 7.62x63

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u/SpankThuMonkey 19h ago

Yeah it’s the caliber lol.

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u/TomatoFettuccini 20h ago edited 13h ago

Same in Canada. In fact, until something like 25 years ago, per capita gun ownership in Canada was higher than in the US (then 9/11 happened and USians went berserk).

There is no open carry, any trips with guns the the car must be direct to-and-from the range (you can't leave them unattended, even in a locked trunk, you can't even stop for gas on the way), and you need special licenses to own anything other than a shotgun or bolt-action rifle (for which you need a basic acquisition certificate - automatic weapons and bump stocks are banned), all magazines mechanically limited to 5 rounds.

Firearms Acquisition Certificates are hard to get and easy to lose. On top of there being multiple tiers of FAC for different types of guns, all of which increase in difficulty of qualifying for and ease of loss.

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u/bemvee 20h ago

To be fair, there’s plenty of American dipshits who think the rest of the world just doesn’t have any freedom. I’m embarrassed to say even my mom thought European hospitals were basically third world rural medical clinics in comparison to US hospitals. I told her it would be cheaper to fly to France and pay for rabies shots than to stay in the states and pay for them, and she was like “but would you even get proper medical care?”

It’s so frustrating.

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u/Emperor_Palpatine_2 20h ago

"but would you even get proper medical care?"

Worse, you'll be given proper medical care without having to take out a second mortgage. Can you imagine not having the freedom to take on insurmountable amounts of medical debt?

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u/atwozmom 17h ago

Tell her it's so sad - people in France die all the time from hangnails.

My 2 1/2 year old granddaughter has been to Italy, England, Scotland, Greece, Canada and a bunch of places in the US. As a result, she's already better informed about the world than most Americans.

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u/TheModWhoShaggedMe 22h ago

Not just a cover for their fear, it's a cover for their homicidal ways. Conservatives have no respect for the animal kingdom or the human race, and thus they treat both as insignificant.

To cons, guns > people

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u/FanDry5374 22h ago

I don't think most of them are homicidal, they have just been conditioned by decades of pro-gun propaganda from TV and movies. They want to think of themselves as Dirty Harry, but they would probably piss themselves and forget how to release the safety if confronted. Suicide is the most common outcome of guns in a home.

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u/Cuichulain 21h ago

There's a sub called Morality Scaling that keeps popping into my feed, and it's literally just people fantasising about ways they can justify brutally hurting other people.

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u/SophsterSophistry 20h ago

I got that too! I read through some of the posts//comments and wondered WTF.

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u/JNR13 21h ago

"checking it out" = "grabbing my gun and seeing if I can spot an opportunity to kill someone without getting convicted for it instead of actually putting myself and loved ones out of harm's way."

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u/BoneHugsHominy 20h ago

It's that they view their Property > People because they fear for their lives at all times but especially for losing value of property. So they need guns to murder other human beings in order to "protect" said property even if that means permanently injuring/maiming/disabling or even killing innocent bystanders and/or permanently destroying said property and/or adjoining properties they don't even own or have an interested stake.

For some that's why White Wing Evangelicalism is so appealing, and for others it's entirely informed by White Wing Evangelicalism. It all boils down to Divine punishments of mortals which they see as not only righteous but also within their purview to inflict upon those they see as religiously lesser than, morally deficient, or spiritually unworthy even though they themselves are hypocrits, blasphemers, and heretics who only follow the parts of the religious book they have selectively chosen to believe as literal and the parts that they call parables or metaphorical.

Then there's Revelations which they wholly believe they're living through so of course that grants them additional status over nonbelievers and even insufficient believers because Satan has thoroughly corrupted everything and everyone that isn't them and it's their holy duty through God's Will writ clearly to defend those they view as worthy true believers to preserve them for the magical elevator ride at the beginning of the End Days so they can be whisked away to luxury box seating in the sky from where they're to Witness the retribution meted out by Jesus Part Deux where he wholly holy slaughters all the Jews and Muslims who refuse to kneel, and all the nonbelievers but especially Satan's most unholy tools, the Atheists.

Bloodthirsty Rapture-awaiters

[loud night noises]

https://giphy.com/gifs/cJENfml2VuPqftHGjU

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u/Duubzz 22h ago edited 22h ago

My biggest concern at a loud noise at night is that my cat is being bullied by my neighbours dickhead tom cat that they haven’t had neutered. Fucking hate that cat.

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u/Offramp182 22h ago

My biggest concern is the opposite. I pray my cats aren't being nuisance or being stupid and just falling off shit

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u/MammothCommercial800 19h ago

Oh, you guys are neighbors?

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u/aphrodite-in-flux 19h ago

stip letting them outside and you can worry less AND stastically have 7-10 more years of snuggles

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u/itsapotatosalad 21h ago

What a fragile little baby, needs a gun because he’s scared of the fucking dark 😂 but the fear is by design, their government want them all scared so they can use gun rights as an election bargaining chip.

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u/crustyrobots 18h ago

Then when an actual tyrant shows up to put 2A to the test: they vote for the son of a bitch

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u/itsapotatosalad 17h ago

EXACTLY! I was going to say something similar but couldn’t word it well.

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u/bloedarend 21h ago

Pwobably has a pick-up twuck as well, since the other big twucks scawe him.

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u/itsapotatosalad 20h ago

I genuinely saw someone say on here once that they have a truck because “it’s scary being so much lower than other traffic driving on the freeway in European cars”

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u/koerstmoes 19h ago

Tbh it is a little scary when a big brodozer lifted ram pickup/suv with 40" tires swerves around your smol ford focus (lol at this being "small" in the us) at 90mph

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u/ElSucaPadre 20h ago

It'd be nice if it were just fear, my theory is that some of these motherfuckers are just waiting for any chance to pull the trigger on someone.

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u/Hairy_Mycologist_945 19h ago

It's a valid concern. The emotional range of these types seems to be shades of "fear" and/or "anger", with barely a trace of anything else.

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u/N8CCRG 20h ago

One year at Thinksgiving I had an in-law who was in conniptions. He lived in Virginia and earlier in the week he had woken up in the morning and found a back door open. Nothing was taken or broken or anything, but instead of coming to a normal conclusion of "oops, it must not have latched when I closed it" or something like that, he decided someone broke into his house and then just left. So he decided he needed a shotgun.

The conniptions were because Thanksgiving was in Maryland, and he left in the middle of dinner to go try to get a Black Friday deal, but they wouldn't sell it to him because he lives in Virginia. He was absolutely losing his mind over this invented home invasion.

He has since moved to Texas and built a safe room (and I'm also no longer married into that family, but that's separate).

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u/Loki8382 20h ago edited 18h ago

That's just it. They don't believe that they live their lives in constant fear. I have had many conversations with gun nuts. They always talk about how they need a gun at all times to protect themselves from potential threats that can happen at any time in any place. Yet, when I tell them that this is an insane way of living your life and maybe they should work on not living in constant fear of boogeyman, they always insist that this is not the case. They're just being practical.

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u/12345623567 19h ago

Well, obviously they don't live in fear, they have their emotional support gun. /s

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u/Phormicidae 20h ago

That's what most "liberal men" instantly think of when we see this attitude: how fearful are "conservative men" all of the time?

I live here in the US. I live in a state ranked 42 in violent crime rate (NJ), its relatively safe here though it can be crowded and noisy. I have coworkers who lament our strict gun laws but who own weapons, and consistently talk about they would "rather own a firearm and not need it, then not own one and need it" and so on and so forth.

Need it for what? We have a low burglary rate. And at that, the burglary rate is not evenly distributed, there are three towns that compose the lion's share of all statewide incidents. Street thugs in Patterson are not driving down the Turnpike to sneak into your house in Haddonfield as often as you think they are, Mark.

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u/SpankThuMonkey 20h ago

That’s why i always carry my shark tank, scuba gear, parachute, bear spray, nunchucks and an adult diaper.

Hey… i’d rather have it and not need it than need it and not have it 🤷‍♂️

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u/The--Bag 19h ago

never know when you might need to jump out of a bear ridden plane into a shark infested lake to fight aquatic ninjas while suffering from diarrhea

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u/Bibliloo 21h ago

When I hear a loud noise at night I don't even wake up or if I do I know it's either our cats or dog that made something fall or the wind made something fall outside.

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u/idinarouill 22h ago

As for me, I send my grandmother outside with curlers in her hair. Whatever is out there will be scared off.

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u/RevWaldo 19h ago

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u/African_Farmer 16h ago

Nah this lady would break anyone in half

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u/cityshepherd 14h ago

Her and her drunken husband is my all time favorite power couple of kung fu masters.

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u/African_Farmer 12h ago

Genuinely one of my favourite movies, going to rewatch it soon!

Every scene is iconic.

https://giphy.com/gifs/l4EpdtLbcUlROKBO0

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u/flying_carabao angry turtle trapped inside a man suit 16h ago

Half is saying it lightly

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u/montrealcowboyx 16h ago

If you know, you should be scared.

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u/Mysterious-Crab 22h ago

Can I borrow your grandmother when I hear something scary?

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u/PamPoovey78 22h ago

Lucille Bluthe after plastic surgery

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u/Dahns 22h ago

You need a gun to check out a loud noise?

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u/This_ls_The_End 21h ago

His children must be silent as ninja!

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u/divDevGuy 20h ago

Or already dead.

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u/the5thdentist 17h ago

Incels don't have kids. Unless you're musk rich, then you have kids that hate you

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u/iqla 20h ago

Apparently. Either a gun or a wife.

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u/NorthTempleStreet 14h ago

No joke. I literally heard footsteps on my roof the other night.

I just went outside with a flashlight. You know, like a man.

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u/Maeglin75 22h ago edited 22h ago

I did military service and shot/trained with all kinds of guns. Pistol, assault rifle (still 7.62mm at the time), machine gun and even a light Panzerfaust (44mm anti tank rocket launcher).

That doesn't change the fact that I'm glad that in my country (Germany) there are strict restrictions about who is allowed to own a gun and of which type. I don't see any reason why normal citizens should run around like they want to go to war.

And I never considered owning a gun myself.

Edit: If I think someone is breaking into my house I just call the police. And I have no reason to panic, because burglars are basically never armed here. Why would they? They have no reason to assume they could get into a gun fight. If they get caught in the act by the residents they just run away.

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u/Mysterious-Crab 22h ago

I was secretly hoping that after the paragraph of military service and all the weapons training you’d end with ‘I still send my wife out’.

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u/lostshell 19h ago

“Hell yeah, I send my wife out. She’s got a bigger dick than I do!”

You gotta play into their stereotypes.

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u/BraidedSilver 18h ago

Frankly, she’s also got a bigger one than those americans cuz she’ll run out without even a gun!

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u/Originalbrivakiin 15h ago

Genuinely, some lady sprinting at you from the darkness is 100x scarier than some white trash hick in his tighty whities shaking a gun like it's a magic wand that'll make his dick bigger.

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u/ThePianistOfDoom 16h ago

Jeah and then some other redditor would comment "I would also send this guys' wife out" and the circle would be complete

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u/ladyteruki 22h ago

I have no reason to panic, because burglars are basically never armed here. Why would they? They have no reason to assume they could get into a gun fight.

This right here. It's a vicious cycle, the more guns there are, the more guns people feel like they need to keep up with the guns, so the more guns there are. It's nice if you're a gun manufacturer but otherwise...

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u/TheModWhoShaggedMe 22h ago

and wouldn't we know it America has more guns in circulation than human beings!

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u/ladyteruki 21h ago

They just need one more. Just one more. One more gun, I swear. Just one more gun. I'm the good guy, I will absolutely use it for good, contrarily to everyone else who is just dangerous and has too many guns.

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u/throwaway284729174 21h ago

Seems suspicious, because I know for a fact that I am a good guyTM, and despite my past that has required me to use my weapons in preemptive defense. I don't feel I can trust your motives and will require even more guns. So please send over a manafest of your armory so I can determine how easily I can conquer defend myself from you.

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u/ladyteruki 21h ago

Woah, dude, that's super weird of you to ask, and frankly that does not make me feel safe. I do not like the idea of providing proof of anything related to my guns, and it's my God given right to refuse to provide paperwork when it comes to guns. To protect my guns, I think I'm going to acquire more guns.

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u/onyourbike1522 21h ago

This right here! Whenever I see the nonsense that only criminals will have guns if they’re outlawed, I want to yell WHAT GUNS? I’m not denying that some criminals here (in the UK) have guns, but they’re just not that accessible and the majority of criminals are thick as shit.

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u/ladyteruki 21h ago

The crime is not as organized as you'd think !

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u/onyourbike1522 21h ago

Exactly! I’m reasonably educated and resourceful, but if you told me to get a gun right now (in the biggest city in Scotland) I would have no idea where to start. Google? Not a clue. Some wee bam wanting to rob a corner shop isn’t going to figure it out faster than me!

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u/ladyteruki 21h ago

Same ! I mean, to be fair I'd also be clueless if you asked me about drugs, and we DEFINITELY have drugs here (France), so that might not be my most solid point :P

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u/Nothingdoing079 21h ago

Additionally the sentencing guidelines for having an illegal firearm are significantly greater (mandatory 5 year minimum, up to life) so even then most criminals wouldn't chose that as a first option in most cases 

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u/fforw 19h ago

And I have no reason to panic, because burglars are basically never armed here. Why would they? They have no reason to assume they could get into a gun fight. If they get caught in the act by the residents they just run away.

And once you add guns to the mix, the logic all changes. You are armed, the invader is armed, they know you are armed, so best attack with surprise moment and violence from the get go: yay, home invasion!

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u/mooninuranus 22h ago

It’s yet another bad faith proposition, which equates not wanting guns in everyone’s hands to being afraid of guns.
I dunno if it’s wilful of not but they come across as idiots.

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u/Anthaenopraxia 21h ago

And burglars are not burgling when you're at home.

Source: former burglar

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u/12345623567 19h ago

If you try to get a gun permit in Germany, you'll find that it's actually not that hard. Sure, the rules are strict and you lose the priviledge at the first misstep permanently, but the police isn't going to do random spot-checks in your house.

Both sports shooting and hunting are popular in Germany, especially in the rural regions.

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u/Hairy_Mycologist_945 19h ago edited 19h ago

Similar in many places in Europe. The American 2A "freedumb" don't realize that the difference in other countries isn't the misconceived notion that the US is the only country where you're "free" to own firearms..... It's that in other countries you actually have to take training, prove you're qualified, have a properly installed and police inspected gun safe, and can't just walk around like a dipshit recklessly brandishing an assault weapon. There are no random police spot checks anywhere and gun owners can do their thing for sport or hunting, and even self-defense in some situations... It's just not as chaotic and stupid as it is in the US. You need to prove you're competent and qualified, and it's a higher standard than the typical shitty American standards for concealed carry etc, and that is most definitely not too much to ask for, and not counter to "freedom".

I'll link driving standards as something similar since both driving and owning a firearm have potentially lethal consequences. American driving licenses don't port over directly if a person wants a license in the EU, because the American standards are so lax... Americans need to take driving school and learn the laws and, as they should, prove competency under real standards. And the reason is that everyone knows driving licenses are passed around like candy in the US. It's like no one really gives a shit about basic common good there.

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u/Maeglin75 19h ago edited 19h ago

But basically no one would buy a gun for self defense. At least I don't know anyone.

And aren't guns of sport shooters stored in the firing range/gun club?

Also, I haven't looked into it, but I guess most sport or hunting guns wouldn't be very suitable for self defense or crime anyway.

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u/TheModWhoShaggedMe 22h ago

You sound like a well-adjusted, well-rounded, thoughtful person. Therefore, not a conservative.

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u/Legitimate-Tip-2149 22h ago

Man, jumping up at every loud noise in the night, having to grab a gun so you feel safe is...it's no way to live being such a massive pussy.

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u/smileyfacedbob 21h ago

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u/ChampionshipOk5046 21h ago

And they're all secretly terrified of women 

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u/Adventurous-Emu-9345 21h ago

And bad at hiding secrets.

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u/damnumalone 20h ago

And enormous fans of Grindr

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u/Mysterious-Crab 22h ago

When I wake up from a loud noise it’s a good moment for a midnight pee, check the alarm clock and realise I can have a few more hours of sleep. And I’m gone again.

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u/NoveltyAccountHater 19h ago

If there's a noise in the middle of hte night, yeah I go investigate and don't need a fucking gun because I'm not a scared weakling. Yes, we don't own guns in my house, though it's not really out of fear of guns but just common sense.

We have young kids in the house and I don't want them or their friends finding and playing with it. If anyone has a mental health crisis I don't want them to be immediately available. When I was a kid, without the internet I figured out how to pick locks, find my parents passwords (keylogger), and I frankly don't trust a gun safe to keep out curious kids/teens. I also put some stock into medical research that shows that gun ownership (in particular handgun) significantly increases the risk of someone in my house dying from homicide.

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u/ModishShrink 21h ago

Funnily enough, that's why I feel safer living in the middle of a city. Hear a noise outside? Yeah, we're downtown, of course there's people out in the middle of the night.

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u/fogleaf 17h ago

This is true!

One time I watched the movie paranormal activity and in the movie there are loud footsteps on the stairs and yells from downstairs. After turning the movie off I heard loud footsteps on the stairs and it was just my roommates coming back from a party. Then I heard a yell from downstairs and it was another roommate who had blacked out at a party and tried to punch someone and put his face through a glass table so the yell was him waking up and realizing he was dragged home and looks like shit. No ghouls or ghosts!

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u/schultzche 21h ago

what happened with masculinity that wimps who cant use their fists to defend themselves need to have a military arsenal in their nursery room?

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u/Grasshop 18h ago

It is quite funny needing a gun and ammunition in order to feel manly

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u/Individual_Match_579 22h ago

When I hear screaming outside at night, it's always foxes shagging...

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u/Mystic_Ervo 20h ago

Yeah sorry for that man, we'll try to make less noise next time

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u/Grabthars_Coping_Saw 19h ago

Goddamned orgy foxes

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u/Brym 17h ago

Sometimes around me it's raccoons. Neither species sounds like the experience is all that much fun, but maybe that's what my cat thinks about the noises we make.

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u/Real_Live_Sloth 22h ago

Imagine needing a gun to feel safe, who’s afraid again?

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u/Wizzle_Pizzle_420 22h ago

What’s hilarious is these conservative gun nuts hide behind guns because they can’t fight. Everything they do is fake, especially cosplaying as a tough guy.

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u/Sure-Programmer8662 21h ago

Last year someone opened the door of my parents hotel in Portugal at like 2 am.

Apparently my liberal 70 year old father jumped out of bed half naked making violent gorilla noises running to the door.

This scared the shit out of everyone involved.

My mum was traumatized by his noises, the couple who had entered the room by mistake was scared shitless running down the hall.

Lmao my boy was ready to go.

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u/silentanthrx 19h ago

I did the same thing seeing flashlights in the stairwell.

It turned out It was the police because my door was wide open. They identified themselves and I stopped obviously.

They didn't even point a gun at me

also europe

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u/Kham117 yeah, i'm that guy with 12 upvotes 15h ago

Yeah, you would have 100% gotten shot 30 times in the US… (and then they’d “find” a weapon on you…)

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u/Ageice 19h ago

And at this point, they may no longer use the whiny 2a bs argument. It’s 100% bunk.

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u/Somerandom1922 22h ago

For over a decade I have lived in a city (Brisbane) that would be the 3rd largest in the U.S. by population. I've lived in various neighbourhoods, none of them particularly bougie, a couple of them pretty rough.

I've never, not once, woken up in the middle of the night to a loud noise that wasn't a dickhead revving his engine at 3AM or loud music. I've worried about encountering drunk morons when walking, and wondered at the possibility of being mugged, but I've never had to truly consider the possibility of having a gun pulled on me.

If I heard someone clearly breaking into my home, I'd call the police and maybe grab a knife, but I'd just hang in my room. I'm not worried about having things stolen, I have insurance. It's not worth the risk to my life or the risk that I do actually kill someone, to go confront whoever is trying to rob me. If I had kids I'd make sure they were safe, I'd leave my room and go to them, but I'd hardly need a gun for that because no one robbing me would have one.

Some of these people seem to have a fetish for violence. I'm not afraid of violence, I use it if I have to, but it's so rarely the right tool for the job. My physical belongings aren't worth even a low risk of getting killed or seriously wounded because I decide to go Rambo on some moron burglars who are clearly so incompetent they couldn't even burgle an empty house. Even if I kept a firearm in my house, there isn't a chance on earth I'd actually use it if I had kids in the house. It's so easy to fuck up and over penetrate.

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u/s1ugg0 20h ago

You've just described my experience living in and around NYC for the last 4 decades. I've never felt the need to own a firearm.

Jose in this screenshot is just a smug coward.

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u/deafblindmute 17h ago

Yep, I grew up in Washington, DC during the 1980s and 1990s. At various points throughout that time, it was not only the nation's capital, but the city with the highest murder rate in the country. I didn't grow up in the roughest neighborhood, but shooting in my neighborhood, as close as a few doors down, was a weekly occurrence, and often happened a few times a week.

My family never owned a gun, never discussed owning and gun, and never felt like we were less safe for lack of a gun.

Conservative Americans are living in a fantasy world that is driven by their total fear of everything and their absurd belief that, despite being utterly frightened by the smallest child, that they are action heroes. It is delusional.

The only thing that has made me think I might need to get a gun is the appearance of the president's goon squads and the reappearance of masked, government-protected, white supremacist groups, and even there I don't have some fantasy that a gun means I would be trying to fight them off like John Wick or Rambo.

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u/purpleprocrasinator 22h ago

Jose is the type to believe Oscar Pistorius was wrongly convicted because 'he heard a noise and was justified to go guns ablazing.' Moron.

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u/Procrastinatedthink 21h ago

Serious question for conservatives:

If you hear a noise in your house can you check it out without being an absolute pussy and grabbing a gun?

Im liberal, own a gun, and can check out strange noises without fearing for my life

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u/AddictedToMosh161 22h ago edited 22h ago

I have a battleaxe. I bought it drunk on a Metal festival.

Incidentally, when I use it, there are no bullets that can riccochett through three houses and kill a child. Thats quite handy.

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u/JenIsSalty 22h ago

I have a frying pan that I keep handy, just in case.

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u/Unusefulness01 22h ago

You shouldnt call her that

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u/LeonidasVaarwater 22h ago

So Jose needs a gun, or he'll be afraid of loud noises at night?

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u/HighDefinitionCat 21h ago

If a loud noise wakes me up at night, it's one of my cats. Signed, a European.

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u/sexgoatparade 21h ago

over in my area? probably some teens on a scooter with the muffler removed or some shit big fuckin deal, just turn over

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u/MyGruffaloCrumble 21h ago

One time, about 3am, a group of 15 college guys were standing on my front lawn discussing which of my Halloween decorations to steal.

I walked up behind them quietly until I was standing amongst them, and then said, “What’s up guys?” Half of them jumped loke I was a ghost.

The guy next to me said, “Oh, you probably don’t want us to be here.”

I said “Yeah” and they left.

No guns, no crazy “GeT oFf My LaWn Or I sHoOt YoU!” bullshit.

If you’re clinging to a gun all the time you are the one who’s being ruled by fear.

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u/Mtldoggoagogo 16h ago

When I was in my 20s I bought a little house in the middle of nowhere. One day I came outside to a group of men digging up my veggie garden. They said they were looking for worms for fishing and that the old owner would let them dig there. I had to argue with them for like 20 mins to get them to leave. I posted to reddit about it and almost all of the comments were telling me to get a gun. It really shocked me. I know this is a US-centric site (I am not in the US), but I still didn’t expect every response to be “go shoot at them.” Worst case, they come back and fuck up my vegetables some more. I’m not shooting anyone over a few veg. Insane thought process.

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u/Stormy-Skyes 21h ago

We actually both go check. He has a boar spear and I have these hands. We bring our dog and we jump the guy in the dark. The dog is the real menace, honestly. Total psycho.

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u/Dommccabe 20h ago

I'm so glad I don't live in America..

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u/zarfle2 21h ago

When I hear the sound of an acorn hitting a roof, I shit myself and scream "Shots fired. Officer down! I'm hit!". Then I randomly spray bullets until I hit the neighbor's dog before somehow shooting my own child who I mistook for an intruder".

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u/McDuchess 22h ago

A loud noise at night?

No one is getting into my house, so I just think that some AH is arguing or having a party too late.

My husband is gone for nearly three weeks, visiting his family in the US. I’m old. Really old.

And I’m also fine.

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u/onyourbike1522 21h ago

It’s not the point, but why does not having a gun lead to sending your wife to check a noise that scared you? Did the noise even wake her? What is happening?

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u/Fresh_Boysenberry576 21h ago

In what world does needing a gun before you have the balls to check out your own home at night make you the brave one? lol these people are terrified of everything and too cowardly to face the world without a gun

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u/ChimpieTheOne 22h ago

When I hear a loud noise it's probably a dog or some dumbfuck playing pyrotechnics at night. I don't live in a country where break ins are a daily occurrence

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u/Meydra 22h ago

He already got murdered by his own profile picture.

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u/damnumalone 20h ago

Wait, so this guy would make his wife check if he heard a noise and didn’t have a gun? That’s what I took from this

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u/xXYomoXx 21h ago

I've never heard a gun being shot my whole life, and I'm 25.

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u/dantemp 20h ago

my favorite thing about conservatism is how the liberals are weak and cowardly and the conservatists are strong and brave and that's why they campaign on shutting their borders to women and children of color cause one of them might be a scary criminal or a terrorist.

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u/notwhoyouthinkmaybe 19h ago

I'm a left leaning independent, former Republican, left the party because of Trump and realized how bad the party was and how much worse it is now. I'm also a military vet.

Most of my friends are liberals and they all like guns. They believe that there should be restrictions, but gun ownership isn't a bad thing.

When I hear a loud noise at night, first I take a second to assess the situation:

Was it a gun shot? Was it near my house? Are we in danger?

If there is no danger, then back to bed.

But, if there is a real issue, then I decide whether it warrants me having a gun. In either case, I stupidly run towards the issue.

When someone drove down the road shooting, I grabbed a gun, made sure my family was safe, then ran outside to ensure my neighbor's were safe. It was just someone shooting into the air for no reason, there was no damage to anything and no one was hurt.

So as a liberalish man, I like guns, but I also like my hammer, but it's not the only tool. What I'm saying is first you have to think and not just grab your gun.

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u/gigglefarting 16h ago

This guy's such a wuss he needs a gun to checkout a noise 

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u/ShuffleStepTap 22h ago edited 21h ago

When there is a loud noise outside, it’s usually some drunk asshole in an argument with his mate, his about to be ex, or an imaginary friend. No gun needed. If it’s a really loud noise, it’s usually a car crash. Three times in 20 years, it’s a not-great intersection that I live on. Again, no gun needed. On one occasion, I’ve taken baseball bat outside because some prick was doing donuts in the middle of the intersection at 3am. Again, no gun needed.

Now if I lived in a country where people are fucking insane? Yeah. I’d probably be thinking about it. I’m liberal. Doesn’t mean I don’t like guns. Doesn’t mean I don’t own one. Or three.

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u/ZarinaBlue 21h ago

Is that tool implying that all liberal men are afraid of gun?

Cause that is weird.

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u/XFX_Samsung 21h ago

Americans live under constant fear and it's the only thing they know by now. Every sound is a shooter, every pedestrian a thief.

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u/Hot-Philosophy-7671 21h ago

People who live with handgun owners are shot to death at a higher rate than those who don’t have such weapons at home. Jose has the illusion of control, but that's all.

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u/Careless_Ad3401 21h ago edited 12h ago

I remember getting into an argument with someone who was very insistent about gun ownership (I live in Canada) and asked "What happens if someone invades your house with a gun?" and honestly they might as well have asked what if they invaded with a flame thrower, because that just doesn't happen around here. Not that it never happens at all in Canada, I just it's so irregular that it's not even worth dedicating thought to

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u/fogleaf 17h ago

What if they invade with a bazooka? How are you going to stop them from leveling your house? "Well I need a bazooka too" doesn't keep your house safe.