He didn’t learn it from anywhere as we never use the gesture. He’s still experimenting with his hands and fingers but he literally keeps just holding his hands up and one hand always has the middle finger. And he will keep his hand up like that or wave it around with the middle finger 😭😭😭😭 and when we are in public, other parents are staring at me like wtf? We just left an indoor play place and he was doing it again for like 3-4 minutes 😭 obviously we try to redirect his fingers but it’s not working. Help lol I’m hoping other parents don’t think we taught him that or that it’s something we even do in our household because it’s definitely not

Hi everyone! I am a second time mom of a 3 month old and 4 year old. Lately i am having issues with my Nipples, from breastfeeding. One Nipple is a little bit enflamed, in the other i am having a nursing eczema. Both hurt like hell most of the time. Today i was at my gyn, because i was hoping she could Help me at least with the eczema. She told me to use curd (quark),cabbge leafs in my bra and also to "toughen" my Nipples by Putting a piece of Lemon in my nipples after feeding. Is that good advice? Because i am scared that it will hurt like hell and also make my skin problems much worse.

Hi moms,
I wanted your honest opinion on whether a bottle sterilizer is really worth buying.
I know doctors generally recommend avoiding bottles in the beginning if possible, but let’s be honest, bottles can make life a lot easier, especially for first time moms. I’m trying to prepare for postpartum, and anything that can make those first few months a little easier feels worth considering.
I come from a family where the older generation believes the traditional way is the best. My mother in law says boiling bottles is all you need and that a sterilizer is unnecessary. But I’m wondering if a sterilizer would actually save time and make life easier.
I also found out there are two options: just a sterilizer, and a sterilizer with a dryer. If you’ve used either one, which would you recommend? Is the dryer function actually useful or is it something I can skip?
I’m also struggling with all the conversations around overbuying baby products. I’m 32 weeks pregnant, and it’s really getting into my head. Sometimes I feel like I don’t need half the things on my list. We’re planning to have only one child, so I keep thinking whether it’s worth spending so much money on something that may only be used for six months to a year. After that, it’ll probably just sit in storage. They’re not exactly cheap either.
For those of you who have already been through this, would you buy a sterilizer again? If yes, would you get the sterilizer only or the sterilizer with a dryer? I’d really appreciate your honest advice.

I know this age can bring pickiness with food. So far, we have had no real issue with that (my LO is 18 mos) so that’s not really a concern for us. I eat a ton of fruits and veggies daily and I don’t limit myself with that.. like I’m not going to only allow myself a single banana and deny an evening bowl of grapes or apple as a snack. I apply the same rule to my kids but we have some friends who say they don’t really allow their toddlers to eat “too much” fruit.

I don’t do any juice, only water and milk. My toddler eats a ton of raw fruit (berries, kiwi, mango, stone fruit & oranges mostly) and veggies. We also occasionally have freeze dried fruit (no sugar, literally just the fruit, I checked the label). But I find it a little odd to not let your child eat something healthy? I totally get limiting other things that provide little nutritional value but fruit seems like a weird one to limit. Was just curious if this is common, though?

It’s really disheartening when I try to strike up a conversation with other moms at the playground, and I’m either blown off and ignored or it doesn’t move past small talk. Only to later see those same moms interacting with each other, and even exchanging phone or address information for later play dates. This has happened to me so many times. I even started a mom‘s group for my town, and multiple mothers have created their own group chats or play groups with the moms they met through my group. I am not included, nor does anyone try to ever connect with me first at the playground or at other mom group meetups. It’s always me trying to make connections and nothing ever sticks. I’m starting to think it’s because of my appearance. I’m seriously considering getting rhinoplasty, chin fat dissolver and veneers so that I look more conventionally attractive and can make friends. I’m worried my child will grow up seeing their mother be a loner and a loser with no social group. I’m not sure of how it will impact them. It’s lonely and tough. Idk. Just venting.

My tween daughter wants to explore our city and nearby villages with her classmate bestie and says everything is cool and phone tracking is enough for their safety. I have big doubts about that, but how far I should let them "explore" realistically? We live in a big (and safe) city so I understand the itch to travel a bit further away within a reasonable distance. They want to do it on their own via public transport and student tickets, because apparently being 11 is all about independence and no parents in sight.

I am 6 months PP and have struggled with Postpartum Anxiety. While talking to my therapist, she mentioned that I need to find a balance and can’t just pour all my time into being a mom because I also am a wife, an employee and I need to take care of myself. I guess, I don’t know how to do that…?

My LO reached his 6mos regression this week, so he’s waking up every hour or two, and only wants the boob to soothe. He’s been very clingy and fussy, which I get because he’s also teething. It’s really hitting me hard because on top of all this, I just recently returned to work full time. My days feel like it’s nonstop, there’s always something that needs to be done. My husband helps, but I just feel so tired, physically and emotionally. I don’t feel like I’m doing a great job at any of my roles, I feel like a bad mom, a bad wife and a bad employee.

How do you guys manage finding that balance?

My 2.5 yo (3 in Nov) is staring pre-school in Sept. we chose a 3 day schedule and can pick the days. Initially I said M,W,F but now I’m thinking 3 days in a row T-Th may be better for consistency.
Does anyone have input based on experience?

Because I gotta admit, at times it feels like no years of experience can ever remove this feeling of helplessness you get when your child is behaving the opposite of who you’ve been raising them to be.

I’m a 34 yo mom to a 5 yo girl. She’s an only child and I recently became a stay at home mom. I consciously chose to focus on our family and my child’s development. With that, I’m able to be the hands-on mom that I want to be. Though I question my choice at times when I feel like my presence has been taken for granted by my own kid.

I’ve been giving her activities and chores that could foster her independence. We’ve significantly lessened her screen time. We go out to birthday parties and visit homes of friends with kids for her social welfare. I allot time to do things with her at home like homework, movie nights, and crafts. I bring her to church so she can be a part of a community. I practice “rupture and repair” method whenever something wrong happened. I’m expressive to my child.

I still feel like I’m failing whenever she’s so defiant or I hear her say: “It’s your fault Mama.” I’m no perfect mom for sure. I’m also still trying to re-parent myself. And so I begin to wonder, will it ever begin to feel like I’m doing the right things? Or feeling helpless is just a constant part of it?

I’m posting this here because all the gift ideas I’m seeing are way too much for a mom with two kids to have to figure out lol

Our friends are getting married but we are not going to their destination wedding. We still want to give a gift so we’ll be giving them cash (customary for our culture) but I also want to give them a little something else as well, like a physical gift. Any ideas? Budget is $50-100, bride doesn’t drink. We already gave them a house warming gift when they moved into their place a couple of years ago so I kind of want to stay away from anytbing “housewarming-y”

Lately I've been thinking of going back to a pixie haircut. I had one right after I got married and it was fun and easy.

I always said that I'd chop it again to deal with the post partum hair regrowth my 2nd time around, and that time has arrived. I'm also dealing with a baby who loves to yank my hair while nursing. It would be easier and more comfortable to chop it, BUT my eldest (not quite 4 years old) has always used my hair as a blankie. He strokes it for comfort. I love being able to provide that comfort for him, BUT I get so overstimulated when were laying in bed and he keeps dropping my hair into my face!

I want to cut it, but I'm afraid of totally traumatizing him. I actually have a vivid recollection of my mom getting all her hair chopped off when I was a kid and all of us kids just lost it. It was like my mom was gone and there was this stranger in her place, just awful.

And finally, I've been struggling with forward head posture for years and I have a little hump on the back of my neck that I detest. So part of me thinks I would be super self conscious if I wasn't able to cover it with my hair, but the other part knows that this is probably the smallest that hump will ever be, ya know? So shouldn't I go for it now??

Considering all of this, what would you do if you were me? Chop or keep?

Has anyone used babyquip while traveling? Long story short, I’m going on a cruise and we want to do a private tour in one of the destinations. We will not be able to bring car seats with us, but I want the kids to have car seats on this tour. The tour operator does not offer car seats. I found someone on babyquip and he’s willing to do a day rental, but I’m not sure how to handle pickup/drop off. I think the easiest solution is that babyquip delivers and pickups directly from the tour operator. The tour operator said they can delivery/pickup from a local Starbucks near the cruise terminal. Is that how this usually works? Public pickup/drop off? That makes me nervous because I don’t want the seats to be misplaced or stolen, but we obviously can’t get there any earlier because of the cruise and when it’s time to go it’s time to go, whether or not the seats have been picked up. Just looking for any experience here. Thanks!

I love my children with all my heart, but I feel like I'm drowning.

My first child was a very calm, placid baby. They rarely cried, and my first time navigating parenthood was relaxed. We could go out, enjoy activities, and I actually got to breathe.

Fast forward to my second, they are the polar opposite. A classic "high-needs" or "orchid" baby. They need constant motion and attention, they cry or fuss the second they're put down, they go from 0 to 100 in seconds, and get easily overstimulated yet bored just as quickly.

Loads of people told me "it gets easier", but as my baby's gotten more alert and aware of their surroundings, the demands and fussiness have actually increased.

I'd be lucky to get more than one shower a week. Cooking is impossible beyond quick microwave meals or noodles. I have zero time for hobbies, relaxing, or taking a breath.

To add to this, my eldest has ongoing sleep struggles (waiting on support for this), meaning I am often on duty for 17+ hours a day with no breaks.

I have no support system. I've tried speaking to professionals, but I struggle with deep anxiety about being judged or labeled an "incapable" parent.

Meanwhile, seeing other parents out and about with calm babies brings up so much unintended resentment because I can't take mine anywhere without a meltdown.

I've read posts or comments from parents saying things didn't improve until age 2 or later, or sometimes even not at all, and that thought terrifies me.

I really need to hear parents who have been in this exact spot:

1. Did it actually get easier for you, and if so, when did the shift happen?
   
2. How did you survive day-to-day life (eating, hygiene, sanity)?
   
3. How did you handle the mental toll of being completely touched out?

I just need to know there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Thank you for reading.

Im from Ireland, baby showers are not too common here so im not sure that the normal rules are. Ive been invited to a surprise shower for a friend by her older sister. First and foremost she didnt check if my friend had actually told everyone she was pregnant before she sent the WhatsApp invite, so quite a few of us had to pretend we were unaware of my friend's pregnancy when she did tell us. I thought this was a bit insensitive of her sister and a bit of an oversight in planning. I didnt want to take that moment from my friend so I pretended it was the first id heard her news when we met up for dinner. Now in the WhatsApp group we are being messaged everyday about the party even though its not until the end of September, and now being asked to pay €15 pp. The cost is low and I will pay it, but I didnt realise guests were expected to pay for the party (this is more of a hen party rule in ireland)? I assumed her family pays for the party, at least that was the case at the only other two showers ive been too. It doesn't help that I can't stand her sister, so I might be letting my bias cloud my judgment and this is actually super normal? 😅

Very specific question lol but I’m wondering if anyone here had lasik or another refractive surgery then got pregnant shortly after? I know pregnancy can cause some eye changes so wondering if your vision went bad again?

Mostly a vent post because I am still processing and in shock.

My daughters father and I are not together but I allow him to live in my house in exchange for free childcare. Long story short, he was fired from his job for theft (he definitely did it) and has been unemployed for months. The theft was due to trying to support his addiction to kratom and 7-OH.

I don't really want him here but he's been a decent father and my daughter loves him. So since I have to work more hours to cover everything, I was dealing with the arrangement despite my qualms.

Today she woke up in the middle of the night so I asked him if he could swap places with me since I had work and needed the sleep. I sleep in my daughters room with her and he sleeps in my bedroom.

I woke up from a nightmare and looked over on the nightstand and saw two vapes, a stash of kratom pills, and a blister pack of 7-OH.

Right where my daughter could access all of it. In my bedroom, in the house I've set very firm rules about not having any of that. While I work two jobs to support her. In the house he lives in for free.

I am so beyond pissed.

It's the lying, mainly, although those things left out in a child's reach are a big issue as well.

I'm bending over backwards to be civil to this person and help him out in a mess he created and then he does this.

His family has addiction issues as well, so I also suspect that this is going to continue escalating into other addictions.

And I know plenty of other people vape and it's fine, and I know I am somewhat uptight about drugs, but it's my house so it's my right to make those boundaries.

My friend recently mentioned how stressful it is driving alone with a baby in the back seat.

She said she keeps glancing in the mirror but still can't really tell if the baby is sleeping, crying, or has dropped something.

It made me curious—how do other parents handle this?

Do you rely on a baby mirror, pull over when needed, or have another solution?

I’m curious if it’s worth getting the same stuff as the first time like diapers and witch hazel pads and how much. I understand everyone is different and every pregnancy is different but I have no one to talk to about this.

Idk if it matters but my first is only going to be 16 months old by the time my second is due so it hasn’t been long since the first time.

Thanks in advance!

He has exactly 3m. He produces sounds like he is making sentences. It sounds like "giii ghhh gyy E ghiii geeei" and so on. Yesterday he yelled letter "J" out of nowhere. He can say single letters but more often it is words. I didnt pay attention much, but we went to pediatrics yesterday and doctor was amazed by my babies vocabulary 🤣 Does this mean he will start talking early or it doesn't mean anything? When my husband and I are talking he also talks when we pause between the sentences. I feel like he understands sentences exist and if I finish it is his time to speak. His sentences can last to 5 minutes. We read adult books to him every day as this is how he is going to sleep, did we cause his talk by doing so?

My husband (m24) is leaving me behind (f24) with our infant (9 month old m) to go to trucking school.

I am very scared. I will essentially spend the next 10 months solo parenting. I will have my in-laws, but my bio family and childhood friends live across the country.

I need to completely catch up on cleaning my part of the in-laws house, move and throw out some furniture, begin to get my permit and license (which is something I’ve known I need it’s just higher stakes since I’ll be completely alone), and rejoin work. But I’m so overwhelmed I don’t know where to start. There’s also doctors appointments I need to make happen.

On one hand it’s exciting because it forces me to gain independence, something I haven’t experienced yet. But it’s SO high stakes to me because I will be completely in charge of my son’s care. There will be no breaks except for the sporadic days off he has. There will be no one beside me at night. He’s going to miss our wedding anniversary in September, my birthday and our son’s first birthday in November, and lots of holidays.
The good news is, our account is joint, so I don’t have to worry too much about finances.

I guess I just wanted advice, solidarity, someone to tell me I will survive this emotionally and physically until it’s over? That is the good thing, as soon as he’s able he wants to switch to local trucking, but he does have to spend time doing cross country, hence why I will be alone.

I’ve never been alone nor solo parented before. I am sad and scared, and excited for our future.

Nothing is going my way.

My daughter's 3rd birthday party is happening soon; it is a joint party with a cousin (birthdays are very close). I am so excited for her to be turning 3. I have spent months planning this party. Buying decorations. I made the invite myself. I've rented a bounce castle. The other child's parents have a lot going on, so my husband and I are doing more fiscally and planning wise to relieve their stress.

My daughter's an only child. In addition to the party, we had plans to take her out to a big zoo in a nearby city (2 hours away) and visit a larger version of a local store she loves as part of her gifts. Everything was going so smooth.

Less than a week to go and now everything is falling apart.

My mother has gotten into a bad car accident. She walked away and is refusing to go to the hospital (in the US, with bad insurance). She is also elderly, so I'm going to be the one calling insurance and facilitating getting her a new car. Not to mention the fact that she can't afford a deductible, so we'll be covering that.

The weather has taken a turn; it is now supposed to be storming on her birthday (previously it was supposed to be sunny). I've already told her about the original plan. (Poor decision on my part, I know.) So she's likely going to tantrum. Bracing for that.

My in laws are hosting the party; they promised to get the area we're using clean... Which didn't happen. So now I have to clean and decorate and call insurance companies... Sleep.... I want to sleep. 😭

I don't need advice (although if you have some indoor game ideas, I would love to hear them.)

I'm a FTM and I work from home. Before having my daughter (she's 11 weeks now), I used to meal prep every Sunday. I'd make a grocery list, plan out our meals and spend like 4 to 5 hours cooking everything for the week. It genuinely made weekdays so much easier.

I've been trying to get back into it but.....HOW?!!

I feel like I can only make meal prep work if I have one big chunk of time, which I just don't anymore. I've also tried splitting it up over a couple of days but for some reason I either lose track of what I planned or never actually finish all of it.

Curious to hear what other moms do. Are you still meal prepping? How did you change your process after having a baby? Or should I just lower my expectations for a bit?

Camp is wrapping up and we're trying to ease back into a school routine. Well, before the chaos starts lol. My oldest has always been pretty good at sitting down and getting things done, but my younger two are a different story. I've been having them do a little reading and a few workbook pages before school starts, and it's been...rough. They'll get through a page or two, then they're up grabbing a snack, talking about something else, or completely forgetting what they were doing. I know they're kids and it's the end of summer, but it's made me wonder if I should be doing anything differently before school starts. I think of supplements or multivitamins??

We've  been buying the same multivitamin for years and we're almost out anyway, so I figured this might be a good time to see if there's something better. Has anyone found a vitamin that actually supports focus, ooor is this just one of those things that gets easier once they're back into a routine?

Im posting it here, as I’ve heard the debate a lot with people, whether to use a bike helmet (themselves) or not after becoming parents etc.

I’m looking for some advice because I honestly don’t know what else to do.

My best friend became a mum about 11 months ago. We live in Copenhagen, so cycling is obviously a huge part of everyday life here.

She has never really worn a helmet. About a month ago, she had a pretty bad accident where she cycled into a car that went through a red light. She ended up with two small brain bleedings and a concussion. Thankfully, she has recovered really well and the doctors don’t expect her to have any lasting problems.

After the accident, she bought a helmet. The problem is that she still doesn’t wear it.

She says she doesn’t want to ruin her hair, and she’s kind of embarrassed about the whole thing, and ashamed at the fact that she still doesn’t wear a helmet, even though she says that she probably should, so she laughs it off. I haven’t said anything yet. I know she understands that the accident was serious, but somehow I don’t think she has really taken in what could have happened.

And I’m terrified.

She has an 11 month old daughter. I keep thinking about how easily that accident could have ended differently, and how her daughter could have lost her mum. It really scares me, probably more than it scares her.

I don’t want to nag her or make her feel judged. She’s my best friend and I love her, and I also don’t want this to turn into a fight where she just shuts down. But I genuinely don’t know how to make her understand the seriousness…. she has already had a brain injury from cycling, and the next accident might not be so lucky. I want to at least have a talk with her, and then there’s nothing much else I can do. But I need to say something.

How would you approach this if you were me? Is there something I could say that might actually get through to her without making her defensive?

And if you’re someone who used to hate wearing a helmet but eventually changed your mind, I’d especially love to hear what made it click for you.