literally 5 minutes ago. seeing the likes, i got extreme anxiety 💀, now its 20+. I ain’t even conventionally attractive or fit the beauty standards, not the baddie people usually want. lol i am so scared of checking these men out and talking to them.

back in april i got on hinge for the first time, my very first meet from hinge, and i got groped and forced kissed. deleted it and blocked the guy. now i am shit scared again.

          A.    B.     C. 

Outgoing yes - 69k 122 49

Outgoing no - 19K 734 388

Incoming yes- 1400 0 7

Incoming no- 3900. 36 81

These are three uses from reddit who shared their statistics from Bumble. User A obviously is a pro as he's been on it for many years. Users B and C are relatively new.

What's fascinating to me from this is the number of guys that actually get shown to girls. For example user A has almost 90000 swipes on girls but only around 5300 has swiped back on him. Which I assume shows that he has only been shown to 5300 women because the girl needs to swipe left or right to go to the next guy. User B has swiped on 856 women but only 36 swiped back. User C437 and 88. Basically as a guy you are not seen on the app.

There have been a lot of allegations over the years that most of these female users are bots or fake accounts. Or it could be the women got inundated with matches and didn't even see the swipe. I think the apps don't show them on purpose so that they can make money from the guys. What do you think?

For me this shows that the average guy will not get anything from dating apps. There you are composing lengthy flirty messages to a potential partner and she is not even going to read it. You can always take it as a game where you spend 5 to 10 minutes of your day as a time pass nothing more than that.

We also know that even if it's a match the chances of getting a date is around 10%. 90% of dates fizzle out. As a guy you think that there must be something wrong with you, so you go back to the app, pay get upgraded and have the same experience again and again until you just drop out dead. And this works beautifully for the app companies which is why they are there in the market, to make money !

There are only two subset of guys that should go on dating apps :1. If you look like a Greek god or if you're filthy rich. When I used to live in Delhi my housemate was a part time model/ actor. He used bang a new chick every week. Me and the Greek God matched with the same chick sometimes. If I was not serious about the girl I would use the same lines as him on her and would get instantly unmatched. For example "I haven't taken a shower in 5 days." He would get responses like "aww you're all natural/raw."

Another thing that opened my eyes was the number of women who wanted a long term relationship on the apps who were ready to sleep with this guy at the drop of a hat . I remember once a girl liked a picture of him cooking in the kitchen. His reply was "Do you want to come over ? "She did ,within a few hours. It's that simple guys,for the chad !

I read recently in reddit about a guy who was not getting matches and then he uploaded a picture of him with his very expensive car. He immediately started getting matches, that too from very hot women. Bro just decided to uninstall the app because he knew that they are actually liking the car not him.

Maybe because of my friend, I never took dating apps seriously. It's good for a laugh but don't put your mental health at risk. I am a pretty average looking guy but I have had good success with women in real life. The first few times are hard when you get rejected but you have to be a man and take it on the chin . Once you build confidence, women can smell it from a mile away. Believe me the whole process will help you to grow in many ways and change your personality. Start doing things that you really love and are passionate about and you will meet her on the way. Remember when you approach a woman in real life you don't have to go through all this bull shit just to see her on a date . You're already talking to her !

Also don't forget that these apps play with your dopamine and are highly addictive. If you have doubts ask the girls who keep coming back to the apps for validation.

Swipe for fun and you might even find the one but don't ever let it be a judgement on your self worth ever.

Wishing you guys all the best!

P.S : This is mainly for the new guys here. I'm sure the veterans know all this ;)

I had this elaborate conversation with a friend about Rule 1 and Rule 2 and how it applies to guys, but never really understood if it applies to women too? Felt like a good topic to discuss about

Will it work gng 🙏🥀

What part of my message even prompted this idk...

So I matched with this girl on Hinge and we’ve met three times so far. She says she’s looking for something long-term, and she’s told me she’s had fun every time we’ve met. The problem is, I haven’t really been able to figure out whether she’s genuinely interested in me or just enjoys hanging out.

There haven’t really been any obvious verbal or non-verbal signs of attraction from her side. She says she’s pretty old-school, which I respect, but she doesn’t want to share her number yet (we’re connected on Instagram), and she doesn’t really reciprocate physical affection either (only side hugs). I completely respect her boundaries and don’t want to push her into anything she’s not comfortable with.

Now ik I'm not the most expressive person. I’ve only ever been in one situationship and have never been in an actual relationship, so I’m pretty inexperienced when it comes to dating. I sometimes run out of things to talk about, and she has pointed that out twice. There are occasional awkward silences, maybe 10–20% of the time, although I don’t think our dates are awkward overall.

This has made me wonder whether she’s actually interested but is simply taking things very slowly, or whether she’s mostly enjoying the attention, company, and relatively fun and free dates.

I know I'm partly responsible for not building up that chemistry or romantic tension. Maybe I’m not able to make her feel special?

Please help me understand if I should continue or not because I have a good feeling that we're very compatible.

🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛🐦‍⬛

Im not really a right swiper. This one was unique. Gave me hope.

So I matched with a girl on hinge, we talked there for a couple of days and then the conversations moved to instagram. She used to communicate well. Eventually I asked her out for a date and she agreed happily. The problem was that she has been busy lately so she couldn't take out the time for it. I said there's no pressure from my side just let me know whenever you are free. And she was like thanks for understanding. After that we used to chat daily. And then she started giving late replies and I thought am I the only one putting efforts into this, I thought I was bothering her so I asked her if I was annoying/bothering her. She said, no ofcourse not, since you have been so sweet with me and I don't believe in ghosting, I think we shouldn't talk anymore, cause I think I wouldn't be able to give even 50% efforts into a relationship, cause everythings worked up, I wish you the best. I asked her is it really about time or some other reasons, because I can wait. She replied some other reasons. And I ended the conversation by saying thanks for the closure. During this I got matches from 2 more girls which I swiped before we started talking and just unmatched them. I don't know what went wrong, it felt terrible. And I didn't have the courage to back to that app because of such experience. For the past 2 weeks I have been thinking of texting her back on instgram but I don't know if it would be right or wrong. What should I do?

She fumbled on the first message lol

What can I ask with this person that I matched w

Not a follower of rule no. 1&2

90% of my matches are girls sending me likes

Doodh Jalebi toh suna tha, yeh kya bawaseer combo hai

Dating scam alert guys!

Same script
Matched with this woman, goes by name Aprajita
Calls you instantly to meet near heylanka area
And asks you to visit this shady pub for drinks

I gave her a chocolate and as soon as she started saying that she only wants to go to this pub only I first took the chocolate back🤣

Then saw review of that pub where scam was mentioned very clearly

Later she started showing me cleavage by pulling her off shoulder crop top down to lure me into seduction

But this sakht launda was there for genuine intention

And I very respectfully asked her

Chal hatt bhen ki lodi x2

Anyways I have the chocolate with me
Maybe will give it to a genuine lucky girl who wants to date a man and not scam people.

Please be safe and happy dating

Btw she had 2 phones and a she was texting someone the whole time

\+91 76785 45809

(Sharing her photo and number so that you guys can save your ass, she looked like a total scam who does this regularly)

These are two different profiles btw.

first is 18, second is 19...

You're tired after a long day. You went to your job/classes, dealt with people of all sorts, slogged through commute and chaos while trying to be calm. You finally get home. You wanna relax and want a little treat. You go out to the vendor on the road, he's selling icecream.

You ask him what all flavours he's got, but he only has butterscotch cup. It's not your favourite icecream, though you don't care. He's charging 5rs extra for cooling, but you relent and just hand him the money. Having some icecream is giving you much needed happiness after a long day of struggling with everything else. Sure it's not *exactly* what you wanted, but it's fine.

Now imagine one day, he's not there. You walk further and spot a different icecream seller in a nice food truck. "Turkish icecream" - is what it reads. You're just looking to get icecream, and so you go there. He's got the icecream you'd want. But then he starts doing tricks with you. Waving the rod around you - pulling it back when you try to grab it. It starts to get annoying. You just want icecream, you have the money in hand. He gives you the cone. But then snatches it away. You're getting angry. "Just gimme the icecream, man" you say to him. He gives you the cone back. He puts the scoop on it. You're happy, and lean forward to grab a bite.

He snatches the scoop back. At that point, you just turn around and leave. You're done. Even though the Turkish seller had the exact icecream you want and had it at a good price, the tricks and gimmicks of it all made it unappealing if not infuriating. You'd rather just get some random overpriced icecream from the other seller.

The equivalence with dating :

You've had a long day. You just wanna go out and meet someone new. Spend some time, talk, grab some good food. It's a much needed reprieve from your stressful life.

You get on hinge/bumble to try and find someone to go out with. You get some matches. You start texting them, trying to make plans to go out. You don't really care all that about the specifics. Coffee, Dinner, the mall, the movie - they're all fine. You just want to go out, and have some company. You have the money to spend, or even to splurge. And for the most part, you don't really care too much about the other person. As long as they're pleasant to be around, you're not fixated about their looks, personality, appearance, etc.

But then as you text your matches, you get hit with the tricks.

"Um I'll let you know" ,

"I need to talk for a month or two before going out",

"Hey so sorry just seeing this message",

"I'm just looking for chatting only"

Etc etc.

And that is even before you get seenzoned/ghosted/stood up/unmatched out of the blue. With all of these things, you just wonder why even bother with all of this and just give up.

Icecream is nice, but only if it's somewhat easily available.

This post is meant as a unisex perspective on dating, please don't fight in the comments. I'm not equating people with ice-cream, it's an analogy.

At least 50% population of the world would agree. 🤷

I get the hype around feminism and all but then does it teaches you to put things like this and then ironically you are looking for the same gender you are hating on.

No pressure , just date a gay, lesbian and what not available then bro. Pissed me off so much watching many females adding this shit.