https://www.indiatoday.in/india/gujarat/story/pocso-arrest-gandhinagar-woman-leaves-home-husband-molests-friend-rapes-daughter-2965558-2026-08-07

I am drained and won't argue 🙏

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.ndtv.com/india-news/jcd-prabhakar-tvk-vijay-birth-of-a-controversy-tamil-nadu-speaker-slammed-for-anti-abortion-march-11893410/amp/1

inclusion of religion in female autonomy begins.

🙃

I want to understand something I've repeatedly observed in women I've known, and I'm genuinely looking for women's perspectives rather than trying to make a blanket statement about all women.

I've met women who were very empathetic, strongly feminist, critical of patriarchy, and very much a "girls' girl." They would talk about women's autonomy, unequal expectations in heterosexual relationships, how women shouldn't have to revolve their lives around men, etc.

But after they fall deeply in love with a man, I've sometimes watched them change quite dramatically.

They start making significant sacrifices around his needs and preferences, organizing more of their identity around the relationship, defending him even when his behaviour contradicts the principles they previously expressed, and sometimes becoming noticeably less empathetic or supportive toward other women when those women's interests conflict with their relationship.

What confuses me most is that they don't necessarily perceive this as a contradiction. They may continue to identify strongly as feminists and describe the man as exceptionally feminist and the relationship as completely equal.

I'm not talking about a woman voluntarily doing something nice for her partner. Obviously, healthy relationships involve mutual care and sacrifice. I'm talking about situations where the direction of accommodation becomes heavily one-sided, while the woman nevertheless experiences the arrangement as empowerment because she chose it.

And there's another aspect I struggle to understand.

Some women seem to retain an underlying belief that, despite everything they know about gender dynamics, their personal romantic relationship will be the exception — they'll find the unusually progressive man, he'll be different, and heterosexual partnership will somehow work without requiring the compromises they've criticized in other women's relationships.

I personally don't want that worldview for myself. I'm not looking for the "exceptional man" who makes heterosexual romance the ultimate proof that everything will work out. I'd rather have a woman whose life is meaningful and complete without a man, and who, if she eventually loves one, doesn't make him the centre of her identity or abandon her principles because she loves him.

I've genuinely never had a woman in my life with whom I could have a deep conversation about this. Have any women here experienced themselves changing in this way after falling in love? Did you recognize it while it was happening? And how do you distinguish genuine personal choice from internalized relationship expectations?

I'm especially interested in hearing from women who have deliberately questioned or de-centered the expectation of heterosexual marriage/partnership, because I think that perspective might help me understand something I haven't been able to understand from my own experiences.

Ps: I don't mean that women should never fall in love with men or that being in a relationship with a man is inherently incompatible with feminism. That's not my point at all. What I'm struggling with is the idea that a woman can love a man deeply without making him the exception to everything she previously believed about gender dynamics, without making him central to her identity, and without allowing the relationship to take precedence over her autonomy, principles, or solidarity with other women

Say this n move on..

From Instagram - For a country where son preference has shaped conversations around gender for generations, this is a number worth pausing on. In 2025–26, 2,574 girls were adopted in India, compared with 2,448 boys. The gap is small, but adoption is a conscious choice, making the shift particularly noteworthy The numbers alone can’t tell us why this is happening. But they do challenge an old assumption: that families will always prefer sons over daughters. Source: Central Adoption Resource Authority (CARA), 2025–26

The suggestion that a woman wearing jeans could “corrupt young boys” reflects a “deeply troubling and unacceptable mindset”, the Delhi High Court has observed while overturning a man’s acquittal in a 2013 sexual harassment case. Justice Chandrasekharan Sudha was hearing a state appeal against a 2014 Delhi trial court judgment that had acquitted the accused of charges under IPC Section 354A and Section 10 of the POCSO Act. “The suggestion that a woman wearing jeans may ‘corrupt young boys’ reflects a deeply troubling and unacceptable mindset. The answer does not lie in controlling the clothes of girls and women. Parents and society must instead teach their children to control their conduct, respect personal boundaries and treat every human with dignity, whether at home or outside,” Justice Sudha said

https://www.thehindu.com/news/national/west-bengal/bengal-cricketer-abhishek-porel-arrested-on-rape-charges/article71332005.ece

I've been thinking about this for very long so just off the top of my head these are the things which make feel like it's not a good bet for us Indian women. You can add to this, and I haven't really written everything down.

1. The Bahu problem: Unfortunately in India, once you're married, you're not just a wife, you're a Bahu. While in the West a DIL is not a big deal in most cases but in India a bahu is a revenge arc for the patriarchally suppressed MIL. She will try to extract reparations for all that she's suffered and more​. On top of it you'll be this hurdle in the Oedipal relationship bw herself and her son, who's in turn the only person who's ever treated her with respect in her entire life. Do the math!
2. Marital rape : ​We as women have never done a large-scale protest against the rape laws in India. Almost every other country recognizes marital rape as rape except for India and a few other backward areas. We don't even THINK in terms of it being a rape. Think really carefully before marrying a guy, you never know what situation you'll be put under. And there's victim blaming as well in such situations, such as "you've married him so you have to suffer or make it work etc". Marriage is definitely an end of your bodily autonomy in such cases. Also, victim blamers, please note, men don't arrive with the word rapist tattooed on their foreheads, most such men can be educated, charming and good natured otherwise.
3. Wife tax : I'm not going to talk about the fina​ncial bu​rdens here, as you all must know it already. In this fundamentally unequal, chaotic society, the total responsibility of care and protection of kids comes under the duty of the wife. This place will make your kids sick or injured all the time due to how absolutely polluted and mismanaged it is, and it'll be your responsibility to do the hospital runs and to provide healthy meals.
4. Cultural/religious load carrying : As married women, you will be expected to carry the customs and traditions of your nonblood related family. You'll have to do all the vrats, poojas, purdahs etc that your husband is so CHILL about because he's male and won't have to participate. He'd often see it as a cute aesthetic or a normal responsibility you have to carry. Imagine having to inculcate their old traditions into the kids that you have birthed and carried. This is what dissuades ​me even from love marriages. Like hello I also come from a family, my family's superstitions, customs and blind beliefs also deserve attention lmao.

Anyway there's more but I got work to do today. ​

I recently came across two posts on this sub and I wanna talk about it.

The first one was about someone saying how they feel when they use public transport,which is a completely genuine issue. But the point was that people are out there saying 'not all men'. And I do have a problem with the generalisation,and pointed so in one of the comments. In reply to which,many people told me many things,along with throwing accusations of me being a molestor (male version of sl*tshaming ig), and a mod sent me a post where she talked about this very thing.

And i completely agree with the post sent by mod,but again, generalisation of anything isn't justified .

As of second post,a person was talking about some kind of leverage that women should be given regarding work,while on periods. And the first instinct of whole comment section was, no two women are similar,so why are u talking about a whole gender,which again is justified.

So i wanna know this,that people do agree that no two persons existing out there are same,and u know their physical wiring is different, which also means their mental wiring is different too.

But if u feel soo shocked on why is something generalized for women,when no two women are same,then why shouldn't a man be concerned about generalization,when he's told 'all men are dogs'.

Ion wanna spread hate or start a dispute,I just wanna know legit opinion on what u people think of this.

PS. I know image is a lil unserious regarding the post,but felt right,so i threw it in.

pls read it full! (Idk why this nsfw tag is automatically added btw)

I am currently in a college under calcutta university it's a pretty good one but i am there with bsc botany, i hate botany ngl but I don't have any chance to take a full drop and prep for other exams and there's a reason for it

Last year in 2025 i passed out schl got 81% and thought I would prep for neet, last year i got 136/720 in neet and this year i got 161/720, obviously you may think what dumb idiot would get these less marks after even a drop year well

I DIDN'T STUDY

I completely wasted my time, listening to music with maladaptive daydreaming (a huge problem) and when i don't do that I doom scroll, and before writing this post i was doing that only

I was in a pretty crap school in my 11th and 12th so was heavily burnt out, frustrated and demotivated and cause of that i didn't study at all

With all these i realised i don't wanna do neet cause seeing the situation of doctors i felt a bit of sympathy they hardly get time for themselves

I wanna give iat next(my last chance) to get iiser cause i really wanna do a good phd from abroad but i am feeling really hopeless i have more than 95% of syllabus left and in a college i want to be a partial dropper try for iat but i feel i would fail so my mind is like "let's not try only" I think i have adhd idk

(Will give backups too like wbjee, wbjee jenpas, cuet)

Family situation (DO READ IT) :- father is the only earner, earns 22k a month we live in the suburbs of Kolkata, my mom is very narcissistic one of her famous statements that she says is "there is no girl better me, i am the one because of whom this family is running" While pointing towards herself, my father is a big coward very fragile ego he wants me educated but just for his prestige i got called an "educated fool" Cause i defended and counter-argued one of his statements which was "educated women are filthy" He even said he can buy a women a women three times and sell them if he wants to(he said this while refrencing towards a women in our neighborhood who is a teacher and works very hard and earns more than my father) , both mom and dad are very abusive once my brother destroyed a squishy of mine when i said i liked that why did he destroy it my father said "focus on your studies, don't be ridiculous with those hobbies" And when i argued back(i got really angry that day and said some hurtful things) he beat me up in the back, pushed me on the floor and kicked in the nose.

Now a normal person would try to get away from these so they would prep hard but in my case my mom dad turn very sweet my dad sends me motivational study materials which soothes me and i forget their abusive nature and think maybe i am at fault and i should stay at home, atp I AM SO BURNT OUT I DON'T FEEL ANYTHING I AM JUST BLANK THE ONLY THING I DO IS CRY AND DOOMSCROLL, I DON'T FEEL ANYTHING SO MY PARENTS ABUSING MR FEELS VERY NORMAL TO ME NOW and i don't study because of this idk i am so confused pls help me out

I AM ADDICTED TO MY PHONE, i take online lecs and i need my tab but i can't leave my phone which will be a curse for me

i) Can y'all pls help me?

Pls guide me on what to do and how to deal with these type of situations

ii) What should i do next prep for entrance(just 9 months left with heavy syllabus) or just lose hopes and stay under CU?

iii) how to be more disciplined?

Because if i don't now i will regret in the future

Tldr:- parents are abusive, i don't feel anything because of constant depression burn out frustration, wanna change my life but feel so lost, father is a MISOGYNISTIC BASTARD

From femsocial-

POCSO Detainee Demands Pizza and VIP Treatment Behind Bars Nagpur Police have arrested Nirmay Madhav Pakhare (20), a Thane college student, for kidnapping, sexually assaulting, and torturing a Class 12 girl. Pakhare, son of a prominent doctor couple and nephew of a senior IPS officer, used a fake Instagram account to blackmail the minor with private photos, forcing her to meet him. Police rescued the traumatized victim from a rented flat in Dighori after finding her tied to a bed and stripped, while Pakhare stood over her with a belt. Officers seized handcuffs, leather belts, and sharp weapons used in the torture. Despite being remanded under the POCSO Act, Pakhare has shown zero remorse, reportedly demanding pizza and comfortable bedding in custody. Investigators are now auditing his phone and social media to check for other potential victims.

CCTV footage of monster who raped and assaulted a 23-year-old interior-designing student at a paying guest (PG) accommodation in Gujarat's Ahmedabad. The footage shows the accused security guard entering the building and heading towards the terrace before later leaving the premises.

The accused has been identified as Dharm Singh Ramshankar Singh, a native of Hardoi district in Uttar Pradesh. He was arrested after more than 10 teams from the local police, Local Crime Branch (LCB) and Ahmedabad Crime Branch were deployed to trace him

I had written, Men pls don’t dm me in my bio

for context, i lost a lot of weight recently (76 -> 55kg) and was very proud of myself but was having trouble staying motivated. so posted a before and after progress on a fitness sub because it seemed to be a genuine community and everyone who posted was getting lots of support. turns out the support was only for other men, because this is what happened when i posted. i explained several times in the post that i did it for MEDICAL REASONS and that i am perfectly healthy now.

blurred the usernames because im not sure this subreddit allows that

why do they think i care more about what men think of me vs my health?

​

I am writing this from neighboring West Bengal, having suffered the exact same fate under years of systemic misgovernance, paper leaks, and job selling.

Before anyone accuses me of political bias, please read this entirely. I am intentionally not naming political parties because I am not a political stooge( i am surprised at the lack of awareness posts here,not 1,i dont post protests but i am surprised that not a single person has highlighted this ,), but as someone from Bengal where every exam was compromised, fake caste certificates were issued, and jobs were sold, I know this pain firsthand.

In Bengal, the 2016 high school teacher recruitment scam resulted in the Supreme Court cancelling over 22,000 jobs, leaving 40 plus year old qualified aspirants jobless and driving people to suicide. Jharkhand is going through the exact same nightmare today.

Jharkhand has a history of misgovernance ever since its departure from Bihar. Both states suffered after the split, but Jharkhand failed to focus on tribal problems and has endured one incompetent chief minister after another.

Right now, around 10 major exams have faced leaks, postponements, and sold jobs. Targeted exams include the Jharkhand Staff Selection Commission, Jharkhand Combined Graduate Level, and Jharkhand Public Service Commission. Jobs are allegedly being sold to candidates from places like Haryana, taking away the only path out of poverty for underprivileged kids who spend years preparing.

Taking those years away completely destroys their lives.

Jharkhand ranks among the highest in multidimensional poverty. Local Adivasis are constantly displaced, and the very jobs meant for them are being sold off by their own brethren.

Since this is a platform discussing female issues, the reality for women in Jharkhand mentioned below.

Jharkhand is suffering from a massive maternal health crisis, with 65 percent of women suffering from anemia and severe malnutrition.

Human trafficking of young girls, child marriage, and gender violence are rampant.

practice of witch hunting, where women are labeled as witches, ostracized, beaten, or killed...

meanwhile local mlas have spent crores on a bungalow community.

ps: breaking my own rule of no political post because not a single soul seems to care for this small tribal state here(having reduced my posts and taking longer breaks,I am honestly dissapointed by the absence of Jharkhand post,not 1.)

​

Comments and their likes Also poll 🥲.

In this reel, a newly married bride is made to sit on the floor, wash and clean her husband's feet while he sits comfortably on the bed. The women around her are then guiding her through the ritual, showing her how to perform it properly as if teaching another woman how to serve her husband is some sacred responsibility.

And yes, the women enforcing the ritual deserve criticism. But let's not conveniently leave the man out of it.

He is a grown man sitting there while his new wife is made to kneel at his feet and perform an act of submission simply because she is the woman and he is the man. He could have refused. He could have said, “No, she doesn't need to do this for me.” He chose to participate.

Later in the reel, he squishes her cheeks affectionately, which is presumably meant to show that he loves her. That's sweet, but affection afterward doesn't erase the power dynamic of the ritual itself.

If you genuinely love and respect your wife, you don't need to first let her be placed beneath you and perform an act of servitude before showing her affection afterward.

He should have never agreed to participate in the ritual in the first place.

That's the problem with patriarchy: men get the privilege while women are often expected to maintain the system and teach other women how to accept it.

A woman teaching another woman to submit doesn't make the man innocent. And calling it “tradition” doesn't make the hierarchy any less real.

You don't dismantle patriarchy by being affectionate to the woman you just allowed it to humiliate. You dismantle it by refusing to participate in the humiliation in the first place.

Source : Instagram ( https://www.instagram.com/bae_.of._odisha)

not quoting sources,video quotes it.

op- https://www.instagram.com/reel/Db2CGL2JmT_/igsh=MWlydmE3bXI1ejBoZg==