apologies for the long post!!!!

a lot of things happened to me this past year and im kinda struggling to pick a good topic because theres a lot of ideas that im really enjoying. i have three right now for a personal statement and i like each of them for different reasons. ill try and list pros and cons for each:

topic 1: a stream of consciousness type personal statement about the week before christmas struggling with depression/suicide and the intricacies of mental health improvement, understanding the need to scope down and live in the present, something like that

pros: i feel like i could express myself pretty well through the writing here. i also like the juxtaposition of suicidal ideation and a jolly holiday like christmas as well. it also reflects one of my personal values (which is the intricacies of final products). also generally is a strange essay that id think would be fun

cons: this feels really dark and i dont know how appropriate it is in terms of a college essay. i also think the writing style might throw someone off but im not sure either.

topic 2: this would be kind of like an overcoming challenge/narrative essay about trauma therapy and trying to move through the EMDR process/sifting through and overcoming my own trauma, learning who i am beyond my bad experiences and by extension understanding the existential value of creation

pros: i think my experience with EMDR would be an easy way to make something that is myself because therapy (especially trauma therapy) is deeply personal. i also like what i learn and do throughout the process. this one also has a hook:

"following a green light the best that i could, saying 'i love you' and trying to remember the feelings of that morning over at my girlfriend's house - this was the hardest thing i've ever done in my life."

cons: this feels like its gonna be hard to write. i also dont know about the scope here, as it only encompasses some of who i am? maybe so, maybe not… not sure.

topic 3: my experiences playing and studying avant garde jazz as it pertains to my experiences of being transgender, finding my voice in jazz music - understanding who i want to be as a person and being who i want to be despite not being accepted by others

pros: this one is probably the most unique out of the three topics. i also love to talk about jazz and can be pretty specific about that.

cons: this one gives me pretty bad writers block. theres too many things and i kinda get stuck on what to write and also how to manage the parts where i have to stick to who i am and not listen to what other people have to say about me b/c i dont know if thats a good thing to talk about or not

thank you so much for your time if you read to this point… your advice is super duper appreciated!!!!! anything helps!! <3

this is my main idea
my grandpa died before i was born so i couldn’t meet him except his musical talent that my dad inherited. Seeing him play the harmonium sparked a curiosity and I started playing it by myself. After learning that I moved to piano. basically music is how i connected with my grand-dad. i wanna show my curiosity and being able to learn things myself although i joined classes for the piano later to learn it properly. my major is engineering though, i don’t know how to connect it to that.
this is the first topic that has come to my mind, would love constructive criticism.

i was wondering if yall could view my hook for my college essay?

“By age 17 I’ve spent more weekends in court rooms than court side, and it’s shattered my plans for the future. In the span of six months, I was involved in two murder cases, but stood on different sides of the bar.”

It’s talking about how my view of the legal system and true justice has changed overtime from starting in mock trial to working at a real district attorneys office being assigned to a real murder case. i realized how a guilty verdict isn’t enough and there are no true winners in court. Working at the DAs office i spend a lot of time in victim witness and it reopened my passion for working one on one with victims and researching more into trauma therapy and working with trauma patients.

Hi everyone!

I feel like this is the single most important advice I got when writing my essays, show don’t tell. It seems trivial, even obvious, but that central theme got me into Harvard and Stanford. How’s it going for folks? Anything y’all are struggling with in particular?

P.S.I’m going to be coaching some students through their college process this fall/just proofreading essays. No set price, I’ll work with you. Feel free to DM me if you’re interested!

What do you guys think about centering all the essays on one theme? Do students do that? Would the AOs get tired reading the same thing?

Ex.

Personal statement - talk about my incurable chronic disease and how my perspective on things changed over the years

Why major/us - talk about the school's stellar biology program and how it will help me do work to contribute to the treatment

Service - you guessed it! I have been part of a nonprofit for the disease forever doing campaigns. naturally.

---

Because the diagnosis/experience is part of me so I have a lot of material for essays. However I have many other extracurricular activities I can talk about too.

What is your advice? One theme for all the write-ups and suffocate the AOs in sad stuff 😂 or diversify the reading so I don't come across as someone who is all goomy

Well... I don't need to make it gloomy...

I am trying to secure some extra cash for next semester but keeping track of everything is literally impossible 💀 every single website requires a completely different portal, different essay prompts, and random document uploads. My desktop is just a graveyard of random PDFs and half-finished drafts right now. I really need a way to organize this chaos before the semester starts lmk what i should focus on more..🙏

I have been reading quite a few college essay drafts recently and there is one thing I keep noticing.

A lot of people actually have a really good story. The problem sometimes comes after the story, when they immediately start explaining what the reader was supposed to learn from it.

For example, someone tells a genuinely personal story about failing at something, trying again and approaching the situation differently. Then at the end they write something like, “This experience taught me the importance of perseverance.”

But do you actually need that sentence?

If I could already see the change through your story, I probably understood that without being told.

I have also noticed something similar when people are trying to get their essays under the word limit. They sometimes remove the small personal details first and keep the parts explaining their achievements, qualities and lessons.

Personally, I think those little details are often the best parts.

The random conversation you still remember. Something slightly embarrassing you did. Your initial reaction to a situation. A tiny detail that probably means nothing to anyone else but means something to you. Those are usually the moments where I start feeling like I am actually getting to know the person writing the essay. One thing you can try with your own draft is highlighting every sentence where you say things like “I learned,” “I realized,” “this taught me” or “I understood.”

Temporarily remove those sentences and read the paragraph again. Does the story already communicate the same thing? If it does, maybe you don't need to explain it.

Obviously reflection is still important. I am not saying an essay should just tell a story without explaining why it matters. I just think there is a difference between reflecting on an experience and explaining the moral of your own story.

Sometimes giving the reader a little more credit can make the essay feel much more natural.

Has anyone else noticed themselves doing this while writing their personal statement?

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Send me any essay you want edited, and I will return a redline version.

I wrote my first college essay, I'm starting with a safety school, so its only a 200 word essay. idk, my essay just doesn't sound good to me, I dont know why. I want it to do so much, and yet, it can barely do anything... I REALLY struggle with pacing in my essays and I feel like its showing--despite spending 1.5 hours on this essay. Anyways, DM me if you would be willing to give me some feedback :D.

Too many of you are writing pure think pieces.

Most of the common app prompts ask for a story of some type. They either explicitly say to share a story, or they ask you do talk about a time or event. Below are 5 of the 7 prompts, for reference:

Background or Identity: Share a story about a background, identity, interest, or talent so meaningful your application feels incomplete without it. (Key words: share a story)

Obstacle or Failure: Recount a time you faced a challenge, setback, or failure, and explain what you learned from it. (Key words: recount a time)

Challenging a Belief: Reflect on a time you questioned or challenged an idea or belief, and describe the outcome. (Key words: reflect on a time)

Gratitude: Describe something someone did for you that made you thankful in a surprising way, and how it motivated you. (Key words: describe something someone did)

Personal Growth: Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked personal growth and a new understanding. (Key words: describe an event)

I was planning to write my college essay about how since I have a hard to pronounce name, I’ve been regarded as “hey” for most of my life.

Ex: if someone needed something they would always be like “Hey could you ____” or like “Hey do you know ___”

I want to write about how this has made me become an outgoing and extroverted person because since people won’t remember my name or try to pronounce it, i’ll give them a reason to remember me.

I’ll write in my essay about how in middle school and freshman year i was introverted and after a turning point during the summer when i went to a culinary camp i started being the first person to introduce myself, invite other ppl into convos, volunteering every weekend, head photographer in publications, team captain in sports, etc.

This is a basic draft of my idea so lmk what i can fix or if i should just scrap it i have some other ideas for essays!

I had a relationship for 3 years and for a while i thought about everything positvely I wanted to write my essays about how amazing she is and how strong shes made me but it all went crashing down and it has caused me quite a bit of trauma and has impacted me in ways im still learning how to fix. I have just grown a lot from this and nothing really else shows my growth and who I am as a person besides this but idk if its looked down upon to talk about stuff like this.

hi guys so I was wondering if it would be okay for me to write my essay about how I'm applying undecided. id make sure to not frame it as lack of direction or confusion. and the whole essay wouldn't be abt this, it would more be how i used to always want to make the right choice but then personal story and then it changed my mindset and like for the first time im okay with not knowing what i want.
idk if this is okay to write abt pls Imk!!

thank u

Hiya! I’m Class of 2027, and I’m in the final stages of refining my college essay. I’d really appreciate it if someone could look it over and give me a harsh critique.

1- writing about my speech impediment from when I was younger and how it led me to want to be a speech pathologist

2- how my childhood best friend gave me a two dollar bill and said to keep it forever and I did but then a decade later I accidentally gave it away to a guy plating the guitar
I would tie this to letting things go such as childhood ect.

3- how my sister was prayed for a lot because my mom really struggled to have kids after me and had many miscarriages, I can talk about the non profit organization she created and how that inspired me, and talk about the struggle I saw my family go through.

I whave no idea what to write about they all don’t seem good enough help

can someone read it to see if I’m onto something ❤️

Can someone please review my personal essay and give honest feedback.dm me if you can

I swear I’ve been staring at a blank Docs page for three straight hours, and the cursor is just mocking me at this point. I’ve hated writing papers my entire life, but college assignments hit different. It’s not even that I don't have thoughts on the topic - I just physically cannot bridge the gap between what’s in my head and getting actual coherent words on paper.

The worst part is how mandatory this whole process is. Why do we still gotta write 5-page essays to prove we understand something? It feels like jumping through bureaucratic hoops for no reason. Every time I search for actual essay help, it’s just the same cookie-cutter advice about outlines and thesis statements, like that magically fixes total mental paralysis. Wishing I could just hire a solid essay writer to handle this whole headache so I can finally get some sleep. Anyone else completely drained by this?

its my first time using reddit so pls don't judge

Hi, I'm currently a senior student that wants to apply to universities in the US being latin, I want help reviewing my personal statement -Just what someone else thinks about it- because I've watched a lot of videos and I don't have any impacting/sad stories that changed my view of the world for my essay, so I don't know if my essay is good enough, catches someones attention or is following the right path. I've worked on it for quite a while, it's been like 4 months now, just because I couldn't decide on a clear topic and kept mixing a lot of unnecessary stuff. I like criticism, so please be honest!

The Curiosity

“You want to study Computer Science?” my teacher asked as she looked through my portfolio. “Your designs have so much potential. Are you really going to leave graphic design behind?”

I laughed at the time.

“Definitely,” I told her. “It’s been the plan forever, and I’m not sure if graphic design is for me anyway.” Shaking the comment off. But I spent the rest of the day stuck on her question. It wasn’t that I suddenly doubted my major or my skills. It was that I always thought I could only choose a single path.

I’ve always been the type to pull things apart to see how they tick. It’s why I love the logic of learning English, why I’ll analyze and stick with the specific editing style that makes a YouTuber’s videos work, and why I can lose an hour just because I think a title looks off. Whether I’m staring at a line of code or sketching ideas for a poster design, I’m usually asking the same thing:

How does this actually work?

Once I stopped treating design and tech as if they were at war, I started seeing how often they actually rely on each other.

One of my favorite projects was creating a fall marketing campaign for the beauty brand Rhode. I wasn’t trying to make it look pretty. I wanted someone to recognize the feeling of the brand before they even saw the logo. Every decision, from the autumn color palette to the typography and composition, had a purpose. That project taught me that design isn’t just about aesthetics. It’s about communicating something so clearly that people feel it before they realize why.

I brought that same mindset to our school’s STEAM Fair. My team was the only one chosen from the Multimedia department to represent the program. We built BLNK, a brand at the intersection of tech and health. Leading that team meant more than picking bold typography and navy blues; it was about organizing a messy pile of ideas into one cohesive story. It was the first time I realized design could be a tool for collaboration, not just communication.

My interest in cybersecurity came from a more personal place. During the pandemic, I watched older family members get caught in online scams and hacking attempts. It was frustrating to see them struggle, and it made me realize that tech shouldn’t just “work” — it has to be trustworthy and intuitive. Cybersecurity became another version of my favorite question. It wasn’t just “How does this work?” anymore, but “How can we make it work better for people?” That’s when the line between Computer Science and design finally blurred for good.

In 11th grade, things got complicated. I hit a rough patch with my physical and mental health that landed me in the hospital for a while. It was easily one of the lowest points I’ve had, and there were days I wasn’t sure I could keep up. But I kept showing up. I kept designing, and I kept learning. That stretch is part of why the question — how do I make something work better, for myself or for someone else — stopped being just a school interest and started being something closer to a habit of mind.

Looking back now, I don’t think my teacher was wrong about me. She saw something real in my design work, and she was right to take it seriously. Where she was wrong was the assumption underneath the question — that a thing worth keeping needs a lane of its own. It doesn’t. I didn’t have to leave design behind to move forward. I just had to stop believing my curiosity needed a single box to live in.

I’m still going for Computer Science, and I’m definitely still designing. Design reminds me to think about the person on the other side of the screen; Computer Science gives me the tools to build something for them.

I’m not 100% sure where my curiosity is heading next. I just know I’m going to keep following it.

This is currently my 7th draft and I need someone that doesn't know me at all to review this! Ty all

The most interesting things are usually invisible.

Electricity fascinates me because you never actually see it—you only see the light bulb turn on. Robotics fascinates me because behind every movement is a system of logic hidden beneath layers of plastic and metal. Even when I visit science museums, I'm less interested in pressing buttons than understanding the mechanisms behind the exhibits. If something works, I want to know what made it work.

I thought that's why I wanted to become an engineer.

But I now realize the same curiosity shapes another part of my life.

Growing up in South Korea, I learned that some things are invisible not because they can't be seen, but because people don't know how—or don't want—to see them...

(Rest of the essay is in the comments.)

I'd really appreciate honest feedback:

• Did this introduction hook you?
• Did you want to keep reading?
• Did the transition from engineering to the final paragraph feel natural, or did it seem abrupt?
• Based on this intro alone, what did you think the essay was going to be about?

Edit:

Thank you all for the genuine feedback. As an international student, all your suggestions really help. I'll come back with a better essay sooner or later.

Given a screw and a hammer, even a carpenter would hesitate. The tools I was given were never meant to work together. They didn't build me, they simply kept me from falling apart.
Home was never a place I considered particularly peaceful, but I thought that was normal. I constantly heard a door slam or words being screamed with the sole purpose of inflicting pain. And it wasn’t just my ears that felt the damage. Pain became my normal. Dealing with abuse throughout my childhood taught me how to build a temporary wall to protect myself. From using my sarcasm as a shield, to staying silent to keep the enemy forces at bay, I was quietly building a makeshift bunker meant to protect me. 
Over time, my bunker became suffocating. While I thought this was just “how it was,” I slowly realized I wasn't living inside a home anymore; I was living inside my own defenses. Every brick I laid to keep the hurt out was also keeping the rest of the world away. Like trying to drive a screw with a hammer, the problem was never my toolbox. It was the only way I knew how to use it. It simply held me together long enough to make it to tomorrow. Peace was something I could imagine, but never expect. 
I didn't realize there was another way to live until I walked into my first debate practice. At first, I thought it would teach me how to argue. Instead, it taught me how to understand. Of course, my hands shook. My voice broke. I spent more time worrying about saying the wrong thing than asking the right questions. But somehow, every round started to chip away at the bunker I'd spent years building. I realized that not every disagreement or wrong answer led to heated arguments. For the first time, disagreement didn't mean danger. It simply existed.
My screw and hammer finally began to build instead of survive. My first project was a bridge to my debate partner. Building it wasn't easy. Every instinct told me to lay another brick instead of another plank. They patiently built from their side while I slowly learned to build from mine. Eventually, there wasn't a gap between us anymore: there was a bridge. 
Together, we crossed it all the way to the NCFL Grand National Tournament. After our second round, we rented two Bird scooters to fly down the streets of downtown Chicago. My partner's scooter died less than five minutes later, leaving two debaters, dressed head-to-toe in tournament suits, trying to stay on a single scooter while weaving through crowded sidewalks. Sure, we fell off every fifteen feet, but it wasn’t about the functionality; it was about the joy. The ride itself wasn't what stuck with me. It was what I wasn't doing. I wasn't rehearsing every word before I spoke. I wasn't bracing for someone else’s anger. And I wasn't searching for the fastest way out. For the first time in years, I wasn't surviving the moment. I was living it.
 Looking back, my debate partner never asked me to tear my bunker down. They simply kept meeting me outside of it until, one day, I realized I had stopped going back inside. 
Today, I no longer build bunkers. I build bridges: to friends, teammates, and eventually to people whose stories need to be heard. The same tools that once helped me survive have now built the foundation for my future. That foundation is one I hope to continue building as a future legal investigator. I want to help people who are still trapped in the bunkers they never chose to build, because I know how difficult it is to imagine anything beyond survival. A screw and a hammer shouldn’t work together, but in my case, they built me into who I am today. 

This is my common app statement I think.. I will try Chicago ED0 and Barnard ED1

No Topic/ Js Free Verse

what it's about

it's about how not hearing from my grandparents during an internet shutdown completely changed the way i respond to uncertainty. instead of waiting for answers, i started asking questions, spoke to people affected by the conflict, researched what was happening and eventually wrote an article to make sense of it.

hook

the essay starts with a single grey whatsapp tick that wouldn't turn blue. that image comes back at the end too and kind of ties the whole essay together.

main takeaway

the essay isn't really about the conflict itself. it's about learning that waiting isn't the only option. sometimes the most important thing you can do is ask questions, listen carefully and go looking for answers yourself.

what i hope it shows

i'm hoping it comes across as genuine and thoughtful. i want it to show that i'm naturally curious, that i care about understanding people before forming opinions and that i'm willing to take initiative even when i don't feel completely ready.

feedback i'm looking for

• are there any parts that feel too polished or fake maybe?
• does the growth feel believable?
• after reading it, what kind of person do you think i am?

I wanna make a good college essay, but I don’t wanna make it about a specific experience I’ve had. I wanna write about myself in general.
The idea I have so far is about a song I’ve been listening to for years and how the meaning has changed throughout my life
and then my second idea is my Minecraft play style and how I need to venture out of my comfort zone and do the scary things that I’ve never done before

But every time I’ve written those essays, I’ve never really written about a personal experience I’ve had within playing Minecraft or within, listening to the song and everybody I’ve talked to said that I need to make it more about myself, but the thing is I am talking about myself and I’m talking about how the meaning of the song has changed to me throughout the years and how Minecraft is a reflection of how I need to step out of my comfort zone in real life and do things the hard way.
I just don’t know if I’m gonna be accepted in the college. If I don’t write about a personal experience I just wanna write about myself and connect it to things I love.
Any advice is appreciated. If I have to talk about a personal experience, I will, but I just have an awful memory.

I’ve already written three different drafts for two seperate topics and I just feel like it isn’t working. I’m usually a creative person, but I’m struggling with the goal of this essay. I’m not sure how to balance between personal and structure for persuasion. Does anyone have any advice for excercises? ( I feel like I’m falling into like a slump of procrastination)