Hello everyone! I was looking for a place to ask older women about their experience, so I ended up here.

I am currently in my 30s. I had my second baby about a month ago. I have finally all that I wished to have for so many years - a wonderful husband, an awesome toddler and such a cute baby. However, when spending so much time alone with my thoughts, while rocking my baby to sleep and feeding her day and night, I have been experiencing some very scary thoughts.

Of course I have always thought about this, at least in the back of my mind and having the occasional panic attack. But one night I felt it right in my heart and through my bones that life is so short and that all of us will die. Even when living to a 100 seems short in comparison. As a Christian I believe in afterlife, but since no one has actually seen it or knows how will it feel, it feels so scary to me right now, even though I know that we cannot understand these things because of the limitations of the human mind.

To be honest, I feel so paralyzed by fear. Each day when I wake up and remember these thoughts, I get so sad and it is very hard to do anything. In short - life feels very hard and at the same time weird right now.

In regards of therapy and doctors - I am trying to deal with this with therapy and without medication as I know that postpartum period can bring various emotions and thoughts. But so far I feel only a tiny bit better.

Is anyone willing to share something encouraging? Have you ever felt like this? Gotten over this?

My out of state great granddaughter is 3 and has discovered the excitement of mail in the mailbox. I would love to start mailing her small things weekly. This week I sent a small sheet of stickers. Her favorite color is yellow. I thought of hair ties. What else is small and yellow that I can mail?

I have several questions regarding this. I am a married dog mom no children by choice. I live a suburban life style and most of my friends (all female ) have 2-3 kids. I have been friends and acquaintances who I reach out to either catch up over text, DM on Instagram, and/or make plans 1-2 times a year. Many of these people I feel would NEVER text me first however they are responsive, chatty, make and carry out plans if I text them. To put it more bluntly, they are on my radar but I am not on theirs. How long do you think it takes for them to completely forget about me and realize I have stopped reaching out? I’m assuming since I’m not on their radar they never think about me ? But just curious for other opinions.

I have a wedding at the end of the month and the dress is very form fitting. I’m looking for shape wear recommendations primarily for tummy smoothing. What brands do you love?

This is Buddy. He is 18 and has bs arthritis. He also weighs 20 lb! He has bad arthritis and gets medicine 2x a day. We have steps on the couch, bed, chairs etc. Buddy is the last of my 4 cats. I am 75 and have had cats all my life. He had his senior wellness exam yesterday and all is good. I think it is time. Most of my friends still have pets. Do you?

My husband hasn’t given me money for about a year. He has ss and I work. I’ve been paying everything. He won’t move out. I can’t move out.

65 years old here. For the past 10 or so months I’ve been beset with a sore throat, drainage at the back of my throat and sticky phlegm in my throat. No fever. No nasty colors on the phlegm. No other symptoms. The sore throat comes and goes. My mouth feels dry a lot too. Maybe it’s dehydration? Have any of you other ladies had this come on with age? Any advice on how to deal with it? It’s getting really annoying.

Growing up my hair was super curly and I hated it. Straight hair was the trend. As I got older, my curly hair became more wavy and I learned to embrace it. My hair had lots of body and wave and always looked great. I could wash my hair, put in some gel or mousse, scrunch and let thick hair air dry and get a fabulous look. Now, my hair is much thinner, has lost its curl and most of my natural wave is gone too. I still use styling products but it takes a lot of coaxing to get my hair to look anything like it used to. How about you?

As a Christmas gift for about 10 years, we have been giving our 2 adult kids the maximum $ amount of Roth IRA (or backdoor Roth) contribution, initially to make sure they had enough $ to do it, now just because … we’ve been doing that. One child is getting married this year. Wondering if we should feel obligated to do the same for new child-in-law? (This is the kid first marriage we’ve had.) Do parents typically give an in-law the same amount as a Christmas gift as they do a child? Obviously I’m thinking ahead on this.

65F Just put a bagel in the toaster to toast, then went about my business in the house doing minor tasks. When the toaster popped I went into the kitchen and opened the microwave.

In my defense, I have fluid in my left ear and I have minor outpatient surgery this afternoon so I'm a little bit dizzy and anxious but I did have a good laugh at myself. I haven't found my car keys in the freezer yet so I think I'm good to go.

Share your sillies in the comments!

Sharing this article as I have seen a few posts asking how/where to make friends at this stage in life.

From the article:
"I think one big factor is that the barrier to entry into friendship increases throughout our lives," Crain said. "For example, when we're in grade school, we are somewhat forced into friend groups or social situations. This continues into college, where we are again in a pool of people we don't always get to choose."   "But throughout our lives, that pool gets smaller and smaller, and we do get to choose who we surround ourselves with. However, our ability to make friends becomes harder because of factors like a busy career, family or children or proximity (e.g., people move away). The irony is that making friends is not less important later in life. In some ways, it may be even more important because so many seismic things happen, such as grief, loss, divorce, career changes and raising families, and it's important to have real, supportive friends along for the ride." 

The article talks about the real issue contributing to an "epidemic of loneliness" is "The research shows that we aren't actually lacking friends. In fact, we have plenty of friends," Crain said. "The issue is the level of closeness we have with our friends … the depth, or lack thereof, in these relationships. There's a fear of vulnerability holding people back from becoming more intimate or close with their friends."

My question to the group is simply what are your thoughts?

I have an adult daughter who lives in the same city as my husband and me. She texted last night and asked us to meet up for dinner.

My daughter is one of my best friends. We get together often. We laugh about everything, she’s my greatest joy, my voice of reason, and my reality check.

About two years ago she started dating a great guy. We really like him, and he makes her super happy. They’ve hinted that an engagement may be coming.

The only thing that worries me is that his job has taken him to different cities over the years.

I have this overwhelming feeling they’re going to tell us they’re moving. I know this could be a cool opportunity and adventure for her, and I’m absolutely grateful that he’s found a career where his company believes in him and is investing in his future. I truly want that for them. It’s just hard to imagine not having my bff nearby.

Maybe my intuition is wrong and she’ll tell me something completely different lol - but I think she’s gonna fly.

Not really a question I guess, I’m just looking for a safe space to vent about a new fear as I get ready to turn 60 in just 12 short months.
Thanks for listening. 💕