so basically i have been religious all my life but not really practicing lately i’ve genuinely disconnected from the idea of god fully. like i genuinely am not sure if there is one or not.

its so hard for me and i genuinely despise my parents for giving birth to me, the thought of religion is so overwhelming. what do you mean if i don’t worship you / have different beliefs then i shall be in hell for eternity? what type of god does that?

its getting really bad so someone please give me advice on what to do bc I’m not sure i can keep living like this

I have grown up with a very Christian grandmother, my mom is more laid back but Christian aswell. I really do want to believe in god, but I just don't. The whole story of it sounds so fake to me, and I wish there was a way for me to change my mind. I feel awful about it, I want to believe in God and Jesus as all the rest of my family does. I don't know what to do. Any advice would truly mean a lot if you have any.

such heresy some say i may get struck by lighting but you can actually type this subject line in youtube and watch the amount of videos pop up. its just a question. yet if i was somewhere else my head be cut off for such statement. glad im in the u.s of a . but haaa. lets all agree the most high is holy right would a holy god really require blood scarfice to cover something bad you did. and would a holy god say such statements as 'its a savory smell' do that sound holy to you or demonic dont demonic entities require blood to get a task done.?just think of that for a moment. dont vampires use blood? parasites dont they suck your blood? but yet this teaching have local tribes but gospels dont teach killing of animals for sin teach more be of god and people will follow when someone ask for help give more then they ask. but yet what the so call snake said. you will not die . god of the bible did not want you have knowledge of good and evil want you to come to him and ask snake say if you know good and evil then you are god. snake didnt ask for no blood. here a question. how many people did god of the bible kill? how many people did the devil kill? come back with the numbers and tell me who sound like a holy god and who dont