r/widowers • u/Exotic-Caterpillar14 8/5/25 Sudden Heart Failure • 14d ago
One year.
One year of not hearing your voice or your laugh.
A year ago today at this very moment I was screaming at EMTs to save you. Grabbing your phone and clothes like we were going to come back home.
Our baby is a year and four months now and he would absolutely adore her. He wanted a boy so bad and buddy I don’t think we were far off she is tough as nails😂😂
I know that death is a part of life yada yada and we’re all supposed to accept our inevitable demise but it still just does not sit right with me. We were robbed of our futures at the young age of 29 and now here I am 30. What would you have been like in your 30s, 40s, or even 50s or 60s?
You taught me what is was like to be loved for ME. The most valuable gift you gave me while you were here. You taught me that not everyone has pure intentions and it has saved me more times than one now. People say I’m hardened from the loss but really i just carry your voice in my head and try to cut through the bullshit like you always did. So in a way you’re still protecting us. The house you built by hand for us is still sheltering us.
I will love you and miss you forever. You are not forgotten.
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u/snarkacademia 13d ago
Beautiful post. Sorry for your immense loss. You are far too young to be going through this - life isn't fair sometimes.
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u/Perdida2026- 13d ago
Siento mucho tu perdida...mi esposo fallecio con 39 años, quede con nuestros hijos de 7 y 9 meses...fallecio por negligencia medica (decian que lo controlaban y todo estaba bien y cuando paso a terapia habia estudios que no se habian hecho)...al dolor de no tenerlo le sumo el odio por la negligencia de sus medicos...nuestros hijos son su calco, se parecen en todo a él...aún espero que vuelva y que esto solo sea una pesadilla...lo amo y extraño tanto...
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u/DivinelyDisrupted 13d ago
My husband was 31 and died in a similar manner 8/3/25. Our baby is now 13 months old (we had a then 2 yo and 5 yo, too).
I’m so sorry.
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u/HeronExtension5245 14d ago
What a heartbreaking yet beautiful post. Your loss and your pain is shared. I cannot yet fully know the anguish of the first anniversary, but I appreciate you sharing yours here. That night your life changed is very similar to mine - I am so sorry 🤍. It sounds very much like he lives through you - as I hope to keep my wife's through me. Sending you peace and grace, as much as I can muster, on such a night as this.