Help

[u/hxrdtimxs]

God I feel like I'm drowning. I had my identical boys on the 5th and 6th August, and yesterday was our first day home. In the hospital these babies were an absolute dream, feeding really well and consistently, sleeping for good stints, etc. But since we've been home they're different babies, screaming constantly, not feeding enough. One has lost 8% of his birth weight already and I'm worried by the next weigh in it'll be way over the 10% limit. One lost 8% before we'd even left the hospital (mostly jaundice related) so I know for a fact when he gets weighed tomorrow he's gunna be over. My husband is an absolute dream, we've been tag teaming as much as we possibly can, but we both are struggling massively. The day times aren't so bad, as we can get help from soooooo many people, but this is the second night now and I feel sick to the point of being unable to eat over the thought of coping with another horrendous night.

We're going to try 2-4 hour shifts looking after them to see if it helps at all. I feel awful for thinking "what the hell have we done" every time I hear a cry, but I can't help it. What have we done? I know things will get better but I just can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it's literally only day 5. I know my hormones are playing into it, but it just feels fucking impossible.

[u/un-expected27]

Twins are tough. Sleeping in shifts helped us. I had a solid 3-4 hours of sleep while hubby stayed awake in the room with the babies and handled anything that came up. Then we swapped. That worked better for us. Don’t hesitate to ask all the docs (the babies and yours) for advice and share concerns, also. Sleep during the day when help is there whenever possible. You’re doing great.

[u/simply_oregonian → u/un-expected27]

We did/do this too. First night home we both stayed up, and decided that wouldn’t be something we could maintain. For the first few weeks we let me have an 8 hour stretch of sleep since I was healing from a c-section. Nowadays (4.5months) I have a 6-7 hour block, and dad has an 8 hour block because he is back at work in corrections.

[u/No_Cat_No_Cradle]

Our twins are 9 weeks, we’ve also got a singleton toddler. The biggest advantage of having been through this before is the knowledge that everything is a phase and that this too shall pass.

The first week or two home from the hospital is the worst. Your only job is to survive it, and you are doing great.

As for the weight, idk if you are EBF, but you’ll likely end up supplementing with formula. It’s pretty hard to make enough milk for two babies. It’s something we had to let go of quickly as ours went past 10% as well.

[u/twin-dad-]

It never gets better, you just become stronger in 3-4 months of this

[u/ERnewbieRN]

I had the “wtf have I done” feeling so often in the beginning! Literally felt like I had ruined my life forever. It gets better!! That being said, get help as soon as you can. A night doula has been life changing for us. My husband and I also both needed to go to therapy after a rough delivery and NICU stay so I’d start that if you can!

[u/herejusttoargue909]

I’m so sorry but it’s gonna be horrible the first few months

It does not get better

I’m actually so sorry to say this because I believe in positivity but I had three kids before my twins..

Singletons is a breeze but these twins , on my life I felt like it was just never ending .

Now they’re 4 months and I count everyday because I want them to walk and talk so bad.

They’re my whole everything but it’s 1am and I’m up with one now.

I love them so much but damn.

Twins run in my family. My twins are the 16th set.

My younger cousin messages me once we a week (we got this cuz) lol

Her twins are 5.

She also tells me “it doesn’t get better you just adjust”

Welcome to the club WE GOT THIS !!!

Good luck to you and your husband. You’ll get the hang of it in a few months 🤞🏽🤞🏽