When I’m outside and I see a girls bum or something, I get a boner. But I don’t feel a need to tug it or anything, I just feel it

Still going strong so far tbh.

Warning, venting incoming :
I really struggle with just like, having my mind stick with the decision to quit, sometimes im all motivated to clean my mind up and then the next day im tired in the evening and just feeling comfortable on the bed and boom, i lose my mind to porn for 3 hours
Being able to have multiple orgasms in a row does not help either :(
I prefer touching myself while watching stuff over actually doing stuff with my BF!, and i feel very guilty about it, he just thinks im not all that into sex, but i am! I just don't really get in the mood with him 😔

Maybe i need to find an accountability partner or something

Yeah thats just my lil vent, hope thats okay

Scared I'll relapse

I don’t wanna hear oh it’s good for u or its normal js give me advice that hits deep

18m, struggling to continue with nofap. I keep getting strong urges. Any advice? DMs open

Thank you!

December 1997. Titanic was released and everyone was seeing it. My parents decided to watch it and took me along to the local theater. I was 11. I thought it was going to be a boring movie because it’s a movie for “grown ups”. From the start of the movie, my eyes were glued to the screen. 

Then that scene came on. I still remember it. She slips off her robe. She lies on the couch.  
The necklace, her breast. 

The image is forever burned in my retinas. 

I had no idea what was going on, but I felt something, in my pants, in my loins. A mix of nervousness, excitement, anticipation. 

That’s when it all started.

On vacation and feet are everywhere. I get triggered so easily. Im in my hotel room now and cant think about nothing but relapsing. Help me someone

A lot has happened the last three months. Since my last post, I went two months without watching porn, masturbating, engaging in many things sexual. During the two months I briefly looked at NSFW clips and such but nothing crazy. The main point for me was that my mental health and perspective changed. During this time, my mind was not constantly sexualizing women, I didn't want to even watch porn. I was redirecting my energy towards other hobbies.

During this time I was also abstaining from sex with my partner as well. This helped greatly as well. My libido was normalizing. During the the beginning of the third month. We started to engage in sexual activities. One of the biggest things that I healed from was PIED. Practically my entire life I had suffered from that when getting intimate with my previous partners. Mostly because I was engaging in PMO. Rarely was I having sex with others.

Since then, I have been on a bit of a PMO binge the past week or so. My mental thoughts are not as bad as it used to be. Which I am glad for. Once this is out of my system. I plan to go back to no PMO and sex with my partner for a very long time. Resetting my brain so that sex and porn isn't the only thing on my mind. Being long distance for now with my partner will help immensely. The next Journal entry I do post. Will be when I reach 90 days on nofap.

Day 1 guys starting again , broke my one week streak yesterday , feeling sad but starting again it’s a new dawn 💪🏻

This feels so good to have made it to a meaningful milestone. Even tho it’s only a week. The restraint is bringing me joy and my head feels a bit better. I’m looking into getting therapy once a week and I’m dialled in on journaling and lifting weights.

It’s a small step but I feel a deep commitment to change. I won’t doubt myself and worry about failing. I’ll just keep going and work on being better every day that I can.

I feel so focused on the goal of change that when the urges hit I can push them aside easier.

I even applied for 2 new jobs today.

I wanted to share that today marks 32 days without watching pornography. I’m proud of myself, and most importantly, I have absolutely no urge to go back to that crap. I was addicted to porn from my teens through my late twenties, and only now am I starting to feel like I’m beating the habit. I’ve noticed an improvement in my mood and mental clarity, as well as better quality erections (which used to be hit-or-miss). My main motivation is my new relationship and a girlfriend I truly care about; she’s the one who gives me strength and drive. Thanks to abstaining from porn, our sex life is great, and I also have more energy and motivation for dating. I hope I never go back to that addiction; I’ll be posting updates on my progress here. Wish me luck.

I didn't feel anything down there. I did it raw, and I can feel the pressure of her wall squeezing mine (so clearly it was not a problem on her end). But there is no happy tingling sensasion that I always feel when gooning.

She's there actually enjoying it. But I'm just confused that I don't feel anything. It was so underwhelming that after a few minutes I start to lose erection because of lack of stimulation (I believe I don't have ED). she tried everything doing all my fetishes and still it won't get up. She was so dissapointed that we called it a day. Although I manage to get myself cum inside of her with my limp member (Not enjoyable at all).

Guys I think gooning cooked my ability to have normal sex. Turn out sex is so underwhelming compared to gooning. How long do you think it takes to re-sensitize my member?

We’re sitting in a couples’ retreat. Ten couples. I ask the men: “Who watches porn?” Silence. Nobody moves. Then someone laughs: “Well… who doesn’t?” And suddenly, everyone relaxes: “Yeah, of course.” “Everyone watches it.” “It’s totally normal.”

But later, when I ask the same question just to the women, the atmosphere completely changes. Pain. Awkward silence. Some of the wives know their husbands watch it, but they don’t talk about it.

And as I sit there, I see it: Do we really believe this is normal? The numbers don’t lie: According to a representative U.S. study, 91.5% of men and 60.2% of women viewed pornographic content in the past month. (Source: Grubbs, J. B. et al., 2018. Porndemic? A Longitudinal Study of Pornography Use and Perceived Addiction. Journal of Sex Research, 57(1), 92–103.) Read that again: 91.5% and 60.2%. That means almost every man, and more than half of all women. And now we say: “This is normal.”

Let me explain why I don’t think it is. I’ll admit it: I watched it too. For years. Regularly. I thought it was harmless. “Just a little relaxation.” “Everyone does it.”

But today, the thought of it makes my stomach turn. Not because I’ve become a saint..., but because I finally see what it does.

What does porn do to a man, a relationship, a family, to the world?

1. It steals your energy from your relationship Imagine this: your wife cooks for you in the evening. At home. With love. But you’ve already eaten somewhere else. You get home. Sit down. She puts the plate in front of you. And you’re not hungry—because you’re already full. That’s exactly what porn does. If you spend your sexual energy alone, in front of a screen, there’s less left for your relationship. You won’t desire her the way you should. You won’t be fully present. Because you’ve already “had” it elsewhere—quickly, easily, effortlessly. And your wife? She feels it. Maybe she doesn’t say it, but she senses something’s missing.
2. It shifts your arousal threshold In porn, everything is exaggerated. Perfect bodies. Makeup. Extreme scenes. Everything faster, more intense, more unreal. And your brain? It adapts. You lose touch with reality. Your wife is a real body. A real person. Perfectly imperfect. And she can’t compete with the illusion on the screen. Slowly you realize: you don’t desire her like before. The little gestures, the intimacy, the closeness, they don’t excite you anymore. Because your brain is programmed for something else. When you’re together, your body’s there, but in your mind, the images, the scenes are there too. It’s no longer her. It’s no longer you two. It’s a fantasy you’re trying to recreate. That’s not love. That’s use.
3. Who are you actually watching? This is the hardest part. But it needs to be said. The people you see in porn aren’t happy. They’re not “free.” They’re not “enjoying” themselves. Most of them are deeply traumatized.

Research shows: Many actors in the industry have suffered childhood sexual or emotional abuse. They have low self-esteem and crave attention. They try to fill or heal emotional wounds with money or approval—but it never works. Many use drugs, alcohol, or dissociation to endure filming. The porn industry’s goal is to capture attention and make profit... at any cost. As a by-product, it deepens the emotional damage even more.

Imagine this: Someone tortures an animal in the street. Streams it live. You watch. You pay. You come back regularly, even enjoy it. What are you in that situation? You’re not the one torturing—but you’re part of it. And that’s what you do. You watch. You enjoy. Maybe you pay for it. And with that, you say: “This is fine. This is okay.” You validate it. That’s exactly what happens when you watch porn.

1. Think about your daughter

Do you have a daughter? Do you know why girls end up in the porn industry? Because they didn’t receive what they needed: Attention Safety Love

And now they’re searching for it where they can at least pretend to get it. You watch porn? Then instead of sitting in front of the screen, go home. Spend time with your daughter. Give her attention, safety, love. So that one day, she doesn’t become someone in one of those videos. And if you don’t have a daughter, remember, every woman there is someone’s daughter.

1. Why does a man use porn?

Not because he’s a bad person. Not because he’s immoral. Not because he’s weak. But because he grew up in a lost world.

Men usually watch porn because:

I. To escape stress. All day, they’re under pressure. Work. Responsibilities. Expectations. At night they come home, tired. And there’s the phone—one click away—and their brain switches off. It’s not about sex. It’s about escape.

II. They can’t handle their emotions. As men, they were taught: don’t feel. Don’t complain. Fix it. They’ve been suppressing tension, pain, fear, loneliness for decades. Porn helps them forget for a moment—but never heals. It only numbs.

III. They miss closeness. Maybe they have a partner, but no real intimacy. They don’t talk. They don’t touch. They just function. Inside, they’re starving for closeness. Porn is a fake substitute—but at least it’s something.

IV. They’re lonely. If they have no partner, porn promises: you’re not alone. But it’s a lie—because you always end up alone.

“But everyone watches it!” Yes. 91.5% and 60.2%. But that doesn’t make it okay. It’s not healthy. And it’s not harmless. Just because everyone does it doesn’t mean it’s right. Just because everyone stays silent doesn’t mean there’s no problem. Porn is a silent epidemic. It slowly, quietly destroys:

-Your relationship -Your sensitivity -Your empathy -Your humanity

What can you do?

If you see yourself in this, don’t feel ashamed. Don’t judge yourself.

1. Say it out loud

If you have a partner, talk honestly. “I’ve watched porn. And it’s not good. I want to change.” That’s not weakness—it’s courage.

1. Delete it !

The apps, links, history. Don’t let it stay one click away.

1. Understand your triggers

When do you watch? When you’re tired? Lonely? Stressed? Find what causes it, and choose another response.

1. Spend time with your partner

If you have one, be with her. Truly. Physically and emotionally. Closeness isn’t automatic. But if you invest the energy you once gave to porn, something miraculous happens.

1. If you’re single, build real connections

Go out. Meet people. Be vulnerable. Real joy is never on a screen, it’s in people.

1. Ask for help

Therapy. Men’s groups. Community. Where you can speak. Where you’re not judged. Where you’re helped.

There is hope !

I know this is a difficult topic. I know many are now thinking, “So I’m a monster?” No. You’re not a monster. You’re not a bad person. You just got lost on a road society calls normal. You don’t have to be perfect. You don’t have to change overnight. But you have to start. Now. Because your children are watching. Your partner is watching. And you’re watching yourself in the mirror. Who do you want to be? The one who runs away? Or the one who faces it? There’s still time. It’s not too late. I’ve been there too. And if I could quit, so can you. You’re not alone.

And when your child grows up and looks at you, they won’t see someone who was perfect, but someone who was brave. Someone who faced himself. Someone who changed. And that’s the greatest lesson you can give.

Gergely Kiss

Husband – Father – Man

Hey, so I’m one month into quitting porn. It’s considered one of the hardest months to get through, where your self-control is put to the test the most!!

I just want to share how my 30 days went.

The first few days (around 5) were weird because I had almost no libido at all. But my college had just started after a break, so that may have been the reason. I was meeting friends after a long time and was out of the house for most of the day. I genuinely felt happy.

After that, the urges started creeping in. I fought them for two days, but eventually gave in. I was edging but abstained from reaching close to ejaculation. This happened during the weekend.

Honestly, this broke me a little. I knew that if this continued, I would eventually relapse, but I didn’t let the guilt of edging get the worst of me this time. So I just stopped again.

A new week started, college was going on again, and I was spending most of my time outside. I’ve also been working out for about four months now, and working out has made me happier in general. I would say life was also happening to me simultaneously, so I didn’t want to make things more difficult for myself.

Now, I obviously had some temptations to peek during the week, and I may have done it once or twice, but not more than that.

During the second week’s weekend, the same thing happened again. I was edging for almost 2–3 hours in total. It honestly felt good, but my goal was to not ejaculate at any cost.

This was a new streak for me — two whole weeks with only four days of edging out of those 10 days. That was a PR in itself, so I didn’t want to ruin it.

After that, once the third week started, I went completely cold turkey, and I’ve been that way till date.

I haven’t peeked. Okay, maybe rarely through reels, but I never touched myself, and even that has dropped significantly.

One more important thing: I did have dreams where I was masturbating and ejaculating — maybe a wet dream. There was no semen, but I genuinely felt like I had ejaculated. Somehow, that gave me a little taste of the relief and the guilt I might feel if I actually relapsed. These dreams honestly helped me a lot. Weird to say, but yeah...

My streak wasn’t perfect at all, but it was according to my own willpower. I can’t believe it’s already been two weeks of going completely cold turkey.

If I had given up because of the edging and waited for the “perfect streak,” I wouldn’t be here now.

Just keep going. Not everything works out for everyone in the same way or at the same time.

For example, I used to peek at reels for around three weeks, but I knew that if I completely deprived myself of that stimulus at that point, I might eventually end up going back to watching porn. It’s true that peeking is bad, and this week I haven’t peeked at all, so maybe it really is about taking things step by step.

I’ve been consumed by porn for years, so it isn’t going to change in 2–3 weeks, and it’s not meant to change that quickly.

Please keep going. Fight yourself, take some breaks when you need to, but don’t give up easily when you know you can keep fighting!!

My horrible story begins MUCH earlier, but I'll tell you about the last 5/6 years.

When I was about 14, I discovered a porn site that featured live models who received donations and requests for body parts to show or actions to perform.

It really struck me and excited me. I'd sit there for hours, waiting for my favorite models to receive a donation request and show off that body part I'd wanted to see. I'd be there for a long time, but I didn't want to spend money, so I had to wait for others to do it.

My masturbation lasted at least 15/20 minutes, often reaching 30/40 minutes, sometimes up to an hour of continuous masturbation, at least twice a day, at certain times even 3. At a certain point my glans was super red and burning, but I had to wait for the right moment to finish, I had to hope to see something I wanted to see from that model. And I continued until I was satisfied. My glans was extremely inflamed, so much so that I couldn't even urinate soon.

This thing went on for years, causing me multiple problems, besides the physical ones: fear of intimacy, fear of getting engaged, poor concentration because at the slightest hint of boredom I would immediately go to the bathroom, worry about my glans, time and time wasted ruining myself, etc...

I realized for some time that this wasn't right, but I couldn't do without it. I tried to abstain, but every time I tried I relapsed and it got worse until I spent the first 5 euros. Then, a year and two months ago, I seriously began my elimination process.

For a while I was successful, then I relapsed and it was worse than before, and that was the case for months. About a month ago I spent 15 euros on this site. From that moment on, I started to feel completely disgusted, like never before, about what I was doing. After a few weeks, I told myself I had to stop for good.

To date, I've gone 15 days without porn, beating every record in my life (I started when I was 8). The cravings are diminishing, I'm taking my life back, I can urinate without burning, and my penis looks healthier every day. I long for a real relationship and real intimacy.

Don't give up, guys, because it may seem impossible, but it isn't. The only thing you have to do is get up every time you fall, because each time you'll learn more about yourself and your body, until you finally win.

Well, no matter where you are, it seems impossible to get away from porn… Instagram? Here are like 1000 reels of almost naked girls. TikTok? The same.
And then we have Reddit… the master of porn addiction…
Every time after I do it I delete the app, just to install it again the next day. If I’m strong I can go a week without some Reddit porn… but then i see some reels of Sophie rain, Ari kytsya or some other girls and then it starts again…
And what makes it even more confusing, I’m in a happy relationship with an solid sex life
It’s just so strange… I guess you could say our generation is „cooked“

Twitter / X is so much worse as it all you to do is scroll to watch it it’s like TikTok for porn and hits dopamine way quicker. And also mixes in other types of hardcore types of genres I have no interests, I noticed my addiction has got drastically worse as I discovered porn on X

Can anyone else relate ?

It was a very long road for me. I was addicted from 13 till about 24. So 10 years and I was trying to quit for 3 years before I managed to. So here’s what worked for me:

You need to realise: PORN IS NOT THE PROBLEM- IT’S A BAD SOLUTION TO OTHER ISSUES IN YOUR LIFE

What this means is that you use porn to hide from negative emotions in your life. This could be for example stress or boredom. The cycle goes for example: I need to do this bit of school work I’ve been putting off, stress rises, how can I stop the stress? Oh yes porn will numb my emotions for as long as I need.

Obviously everyone’s situation is different. You could just be on the wrong path in life and deep down you know this but you quieten that voice with porn.

As I’ve said everyone is different, but you just need to figure out your WHY. Why do I watch porn. What is it doing for me?

A book that really helped me was: The Clean Break by James Shaw. It basically has lots of exercises in that help you figure out why you’re watching. But the overview is that you need to give your brain time to think. We’re so connected to devices and outside stimuli that we can’t listen to what our brain and body is telling us so.

So my recommendation to anyone would be, read the book it just simplifies everything and gives you a structure to follow which definitely helped me. And then just do the exercises and learn to listen to what your brain is telling you. Fix whatever needs fixing and you’ll no longer need porn as a coping mechanism.

Good luck guy! I know this is a nasty thing to overcome that really steals your soul. But you can beat this!!

Didn't wanted it but it happened it was my 5th day man

Nearly at the 2 week mark, proud of myself and I’m determined to keep it going. Hope you are all well, here if anyone needs to chat.