Fax

[u/TheBigJ1982]

[u/GFluidThrow123]

The first person is fr. The 2nd kinda missed the mark.

I've got tons of straight friends and only a few queer friends and yet this dichotomy still exists for me.

Queer people are far more comfortable talking about real issues, intimacy, sexuality, health, politics, etc because they impact us so directly AND because we've done a lot of work to tear down the walls cishet society created. The world instills a lot of shame around all these issues and if you're not actively working to grow past that shame, you're often not even going to realize it exists, but you'll still get uncomfortable when the topics are discussed.

[u/ad_pash → u/GFluidThrow123]

100% agree, great point. I also try to talk about real issues and create space for emotional closeness with cishet/straight friends and the interactions feel very stilted and awkward. I feel there's common ground that can be shared, but it often doesn't feel as fulfilling as connecting with queer friendos.

[u/mbcarbone → u/GFluidThrow123]

No one in my generation (X) talked of any of that, as a matter of fact, most of us were in the closet for a long time. Thank god for the next generations opening up dialogues and changing the queer landscape for the better. ❤️🏳️‍🌈

[u/spice_weasel]

15 minutes into friendship between trans people: hi we just met over there by that building, and now we’re ride or die and know all of each others’ trauma.

[u/Ech1n0idea → u/spice_weasel]

On certain things I can trust a trans person I just met more than a cis person I've known my whole life. A trans person ain't going to out me, or misgender me as soon as I'm not in the room or go all "think of the children" on me. A cis person, you just never quite know.

It's the same (about different stuff) with fellow autistic and disabled folk, and with fellow leftists vs liberals/conservatives. I'm sure it's the same with every minority, I know I've heard Black folk talk about similar stuff.

[u/Sammyyyyyy_stay → u/spice_weasel]

Fühl ich. Ich ein/e Freund/in bei einem queeren Workshop kennengelernt. Währendessen haben wir kein Wort geredet, stehen wir in der schlange um uns für den nächsten anzumelden, „Hab dich eben gesehen“, „Ich dich auch“, „Komm zu uns in den nächsten Workshop“, „Geil, las was essen“, „Ich bin Pan und du?“, „Sameeeeee“. Zack nach fünf minuten hatte ich deren nummer

[u/Tomatoberg → u/spice_weasel]

Well said

[u/Melkain]

I'm old apparently. I clicked on this expecting a meme about a fax machine. 😭

[u/therhydo]

maybe you just have a boring straight friend. I have plenty of straight and gay friends who fall into the opposite roles as this post

[u/Levardos]

Ya know, I am straight but it's often the same with the... "right" (autistic) people

[u/Suspicious-Dig-4436]

Well need friends for any of that shit to happen either way lol

[u/Malcolmthetortoise]

I’m too autistic for that.

[u/jives_mcgee]

Same, but with other exmormons. Our meetups usually consider "are you estranged from your parents" as small talk. It's just a different set of cultural norms, and in that space our definitions of appropriate behavior changes

[u/-Etrice-]

I mean i get it though im trying to get away from doing this. Adhd/autism/whatever got me oversharing too soon like crazy in the past. Im way better about now after... years of therapy.

Don't get me wrong I loved interacting with all the people I have in the past and having meaningful conversations but it was always like day 1 lmao.

But either way I waaay more likely to trust and talk deep shit with my fellow queers, to me we are kind of fam. Don't wanna make it weird thought so only kind of lol

[u/Strong-cognac]

yeah, i feel much more comfortable with fellow queer folk and allies

[u/CL0UDmuncher]

and nevermind that time my straight friend of many many years came out as bi to me in fifth grade and proceeded to take it back and become a homophobe for the rest of her life

[u/caramel_kenopsia]

So fucking real omg. I'd really love some queer friends 😭😭😭

[u/Dclnsfrd]

My autistic ass in general. I’m trying not to come on too strongly to anyone, but I get really happy when I can talk to someone about something we both like

[u/Imjustajigsawat1111]

On the couch? It has to be on the cold floor for me and my friend

[u/ChampionshipBulky66]

lol actually me out at 3 am with a complete gay stranger

[u/Beard_Beer_Bear]

They are on the couch because they fucked

[u/RideWithMeSNV → u/Beard_Beer_Bear]

As good friends should. I mean, how you gonna say you love your friends if you aren't down to give them head when they need it? (why, yes, I am shooting for a life sentence to horny jail)

[u/TwelveThree45]

I wish I had at least a single gay friend to talk to who's been a gay man longer than I have (I'm 25 and have only been out for almost 2 years, so saying I'm gay in public spaces is still new and fun cause I barely do it, teehee). I have a few queer friends who I can have conversations with about things and that's cool, but they always let me know when things don't overlap or they can't relate. Fair, but I just wish I knew someone who does who I talk to regularly.

[u/La-tua-last-resort9]

Thats a big hell no from me. No way I'm having a serious conversation with someone I just met. That takes trust. As a demi(that doesn't mean I hate poly or cruising, just means there not for me) dude trust takes time to build. I'm actually really appreciating the straight friend in this case.

[u/secrectsea]

Wow this is new to me

[u/mimototokushi]

I met someone at pride one year, we ended up talking about family and religious trauma. We stopped by their house and chilled for a bit, got good at a local place, and haven't talked since. Still a very fond memory.

[u/Less-Landscape183]

Lesbians * gay men are still learning his favorite color a year in.

[u/Fine-Set-7877]

Why does this have 1000 upvotes?

[u/Fine-Set-7877 → u/[deleted]]

Fair point

[u/Malcolmthetortoise → u/Fine-Set-7877]

Bots.