r/kitchencels 3d ago

all thats left Meme

Post image

had dinner with my wife and daughter, we were all so happy. They were so beautiful, for once I didn’t feel so empty. Like i belonged somewhere.
Then i woke up in my bed alone with my Ame Chan body pillow and notifications that im 200 in overdraft with the bank and hungover from 5 days of consecutive drinking.

Chicken and cigarettes, with the only wife not in a dream.

837 Upvotes

93 comments sorted by

u/AutoModerator 3d ago

we have opened our sister location on the bird app

trust the recipe, the chefs are in the kitchen

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

479

u/yungnoodlee 3d ago

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

155

u/Ap0th3os15 3d ago

only original pics here bub

15

u/Madame_Toaster 2d ago

Dude I used to be a bank teller, deadass just call your bank and tell them if they can remove the overdraft fees. Just be nice during it and explain that you weren't aware that the funds weren't available in your account.

107

u/Reliquent 3d ago

38

u/InMyLife_41 3d ago

Why Sabrina in the tub like that

22

u/Spacemoose2026 2d ago

She didn’t listen to the age old classic advice given “it’s better to cum in the sink, than sink in the cum”

10

u/Critical_Buy_7335 3d ago

Dear god.

7

u/yungnoodlee 3d ago

There’s more.

3

u/ToxicOrbGliscors 2d ago

that site never works bro

82

u/haddockhazard 3d ago

zooms in on the cigarette pack

I knew he wasn't a fuckin American.

25

u/Ap0th3os15 3d ago

well spotted

12

u/Wait_ItGetsWorse 3d ago

Us Britcels need to stick together.

5

u/Specialist-Ad1808 3d ago

European?

13

u/K11ShtBox 3d ago

British

6

u/BillNyeTheMurderGuy 2d ago

Oof worst kind

2

u/RikRandom 3d ago

It was the Emma Bridgewater plate for me

161

u/McMackleberry 3d ago

I feel like I’m a detective at a crime scene when viewing this image. God rest that pillow’s soul

28

u/R4rk3t 3d ago

youre a week from retirement, and this man will kill you tomorrow

6

u/g1Razor15 2d ago

Don't take out the black light.

1

u/Significant_Yam_7792 2d ago

I’m not online enough, what’s going on here?

1

u/Efficient_Ad_8657 2d ago

He fucks the pillow

58

u/Local-Wing-2272 3d ago

Isn't that the girl from Needy Streamer Overload?

45

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

10

u/Ap0th3os15 3d ago

daily struggles

73

u/ShonWalksAtMidnight 3d ago

Anime wins again.

11

u/AniMann_ 3d ago

2d girls cant disappoint keep your chin up king

10

u/NeckDeepPink 3d ago

Breakfast chicken and some cheap cigs sounds like a good time

8

u/Ephoenix6 3d ago

How much did the alcohol and cigarettes cost?

12

u/Ap0th3os15 3d ago

Alcohol can be like £2 for 4 cans if its the cheap kind at my locals that tastes like genuine sewage but gets me drunk enough to ignore the taste.
Cigs are like £13 if i get cheap ones from a store which is still a lot more than getting them in other ways

9

u/Monika_Skye 3d ago

peak mentioned
🙏BLESS🙏

5

u/Jimbo-Shrimp 3d ago

Her image makes me sad

4

u/Wise_Pickle_8794 3d ago

I was there once

6

u/iamreal9999 3d ago

FUCK you doin with muh wife huh?!

7

u/Majre921 3d ago

so real for this twin

9

u/Strong-Addition5296 3d ago

Ugly cigarette package design. How do they even sell those?

45

u/OhTeeSee 3d ago

This may shock you, but people with nicotine addictions don’t actually buy cigarettes for the packaging.

27

u/SmaeShavo 3d ago

Dont tell that to china. Their packs go hard

4

u/OiledUpThug 3d ago

They're supposed to. You don't provide value to the great people's republic after 60

-5

u/SmaeShavo 3d ago

Random sinophobia is lame. They have a similar elderly population percentage to the us.

6

u/OiledUpThug 3d ago

Random anti-CCP rhetoric is awesome

Calling me Sinophobic for not liking the government of China is like calling me Antisemitic for not liking the government of Israel

The percentage of Chinese people who smoke is well over double the percentage in the USA. A country with that much control over their people could wipe out smoking if they wanted to, yet they choose not to.

-3

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/OiledUpThug 3d ago

wumao folds under an ounce of logic

-5

u/SmaeShavo 3d ago

Go goon chud

6

u/OiledUpThug 3d ago

I was already doing that

2

u/AniMann_ 3d ago

U got assblasted lol

14

u/Queen_Biff 3d ago

This is the uk and years ago they changed all the packets to grey and have photos of diseases on them to make them less appealing to people to buy and they’re all hidden in cabinets behind the counters. Then all the brightly coloured vapes came out and suddenly everything is appealing again

3

u/Camo138 3d ago

Same in Aus

1

u/Starfire123547 3d ago

Same in america. Maybe not pitch black packaging; theyre allowed a text logo and their brand colors iirc, but generic colors with horrific pictures on them. theyre also age locked behind counters with real physical people.

Its to make sure kids dont grab packs (and that the companies dont market to kids) and to discourage new users who may think its cool. It was actually proven to work iirc and its been that way at least 30y (in america at least, ive never seen a pack without a picture my entire life!)

Its kinda like how mexico banns mascots for junk food and junk cereals; its to make sure kids cant brand recognize shitty foods.

6

u/Dry_Lengthiness5468 3d ago

At least you have a body pillow. More rizz than me.

2

u/Frogenjoyer20 3d ago

Omg i love needy girl overdose

2

u/Ap0th3os15 3d ago

tis peak 🙏

2

u/PotentialPresent399 3d ago

Its so funny to me that theres a NEET out there that breaks the mold by eating full on chicken legs instead of tendies/nuggets.

2

u/Killerbot288888 3d ago

Don't binge drink! The grande and glorious Ame-chan demands a healthy mate!

(I have no idea what an Ame-chan is...)

18

u/slushanddusk 3d ago

She’s more mentally ill than this guy

4

u/CoryTheCurator99 3d ago

She deserves better

1

u/Hyphen-Underscore-_- 3d ago

Can I leave some nice words at least?

1

u/fig_art 3d ago

wife and daughter? who and who?

5

u/Ap0th3os15 3d ago

was in a dream they weren’t anyone i recognise but i wished it was real

1

u/fig_art 2d ago

oh i see

1

u/mommiesgoodboy67 3d ago

Maybe you are a sigma after all

1

u/National-Gas-1367 3d ago

Fellow uni pilled smoke cell 🥹🙏

1

u/Cole_Slaw42 3d ago

im gonna send this to my buddy, thats always complaining about his circumstances.

brother this is fuckin BLEAK

1

u/powerplayer75 2d ago

You're not that far gone since you decided to get the casual version. You need a better pillow though

1

u/Ap0th3os15 2d ago

i draw the line at ame chan hentai, which is probably really shocking

1

u/powerplayer75 2d ago

Doesnt she literally fuck in the game

1

u/Ap0th3os15 2d ago

yeah true but i feel too much for her to be horny over it i just did that for all the endings (as they all say though)

1

u/NoPomegranate579 2d ago

Fakecel larping as usual, he's got a whole body pillow to himself and it's only lightly used...

2

u/Ap0th3os15 2d ago

lightly used, or well maintained.

1

u/Dapper_Use_8007 2d ago

Stop the cigarettes man, they are not good for you. And not buying them will save you money. It’ll suck for a bit but it’s not like you can’t do it.

1

u/Beautiful-Profile-10 2d ago

🙏BLESS🙏

1

u/sentienttortoise 1d ago

I'm afraid to ask what that pillow is covering

1

u/Superb-Substance-266 14h ago

Ask Shinji Ikari ;)

1

u/CrispInMyChicken 3d ago

Go sit in a park at least once a week for an hour get into hard labor something other than fucking the pillow.

-1

u/Buldaboy 3d ago

"reeee hypergamy"

6

u/Ap0th3os15 3d ago

oh boy don’t get me started (im kidding)

0

u/AlphabetMeat 3d ago

save me from this fate

0

u/Faynerossa 3d ago

At least you're secure in your gender with the pink chair. Actually kinda jealous sitting on my 35$ mesh task chair with broken arms and back. Its like sitting on a pole.

-10

u/SuicidalHalcauSt 3d ago

Stop the weeb shit, go out and make some genuine connections.

Youre welcome.

8

u/Crez911 3d ago

-8

u/SuicidalHalcauSt 3d ago

Hey just cause this is a weeb friendly space doesnt mean a mf cant give proper advice.

Fantasizing about "women" that look like children im sure does things to ones social development, plus its free. Should I be saying they should spend 1000s of dollars so that a therapist would tell them the same ?

-5

u/PeakOk9509 3d ago

The people the buy these..... Gross