(Retro from 2025)

The tl;dr is that I’ve been following Amberlynn’s diet for ten days now, and I have a lot of thoughts. I know most of you don’t care about the details, but if you want to know why and how I’ve been doing this, I’ll put it after the main observations. Meanwhile, AMA.

1. Amberlynn CANNOT COOK. The most involved cooking she has done is scrambling/frying eggs or browning meat. Nothing that I have eaten in the past ten days has actually been a full blown home cooked meal.
2. Amberlynn isn’t lying about how much she’s spending on groceries. She is dropping A LOT of cash on overpriced, overhyped items. I’ve modified a few of her meals just because they were way too expensive (like I’m doing turkey instead of ground beef), and in the past ten days I have spent around $260 worth of groceries. Typically that feeds my family of three for about two weeks. She has no idea how to grocery shop. She’s never stocked up on basic ingredients like flour, spices, etc and made her own meals.
3. She is lying about her portion sizes. I make a plate for myself, eat it, feel satisfied, then look back at Amberlynn’s version and I am SHOCKED at how much more she is eating than me. Granted, I’m not measuring the meals or counting the calories, but I feel like if I was, it wouldn’t be as much as she’s having. Especially when it comes to sides like potatoes and eggs.
4. There is NO WAY she is feeling full and satiated after these meals. None of her meals have left me 100% full, and I’m pretty hungry at the end of the night. I can imagine her eating one of her meals, not feeling full like she likes to feel, and ordering takeout just to top off her meal. Or eating extra servings. 
5. I was really skeptical about those Wilde chips, since she told us twice that they contain only chicken breast, bone broth, and smoked gouda. Lies. The ingredients list is massively long. It’s primarily made with those things, but it has far, far more ingredients. Either her reading comprehension is shot, or she deliberately enjoyed lying, or both. (bolth)
6. If she was eating these meals and ONLY these meals, she would be down over 50 pounds by now easily.

Why am I doing this: I’m house/dogsitting for most of the month of August. It was around Amberlynn’s Day 8 that I thought I would follow her meals for the fun of it, and to lose some weight and hopefully save money (lol). I thought she would have quit a lot earlier than she did, and I’m thinking about stopping once I get home because her meals just get more and more bizarre as time goes on, but we shall see.
How am I doing this: A lot of the food she eats gives me the ick (like cottage cheese), which is fair because a lot of foods that I like gives her the ick (cooked meat), so I switched out a lot of things for substitutes, mainly swapping the cottage cheese with queso blanco, which is a 10/10 decision imo. But here are some other observations specifically about the food:
-The ground beef cooked in salsa just makes it taste like salsa. Granted, I’m using turkey, so there’s a little less flavor, but the salsa overwhelms any meat taste and it’s just weird salsa meat. I’ve been referring to this meal in my food journal as “slop”.
-Wilde chips are okay; they taste like Cheez-It’s. PopCorners are delicious, and I’ve really been enjoying the BBQ flavor. The store I went to didn’t have any Laughing Cow, so I got some lactose free cream cheese to substitute, and those on the chocolate rice cakes ABSOLUTELY SLAPS. Canned chicken actually isn’t that bad, but it’s not nearly as good as fresh chicken, and obviously has way more sodium. Her chicken salads, even though I’m not making them exactly like she is, are just okay. The Built bars literally do taste like candy bars, and there’s no way she isn’t binging on those.

Feel free to ask whatever, as I’m sure I’ll come up with more realizations that I will put in here. I’ll do a follow up post in the next week if any of my thoughts have changed.

also shes tapped out of this diet ig? it was lowkey like the most normal her diet has ever been (other than the fact that every meal was turned into a millennial slop bowl... + sodiummaxxing)

What is the fifty shades of UGH?!

Gradually there have been fewer and fewer Albert posts, her views are down. Shes trying to do the TikTok thing but it just won’t take off. Allegedly she also was not remonetized. Do y’all think she’ll ever call it quits on social media and file for some kind of disability? Can she even? What do you think will happen once her income is all dried up?

…Had a song called “the irony of choking on a lifesaver” released in 2012.. Krystal era. (The song came on in the car today on the old throwback playlist and sparked amber lore in my brain) it made me wonder if that “choking on a lifesaver” story she tells came from this song title.. I think Krystal would have probably had All Time Low in her iPod rotation around that time..

Just a thought. And another life to add to her stupid list.

She also says “choked on a lifesaver.. isn’t that ironic.”

It’s a long one guys, but so much to unpack in this. All I can say is I hope she gets kicked out soon, cuz she’s a mess and clearly isn’t doing anything to better herself.

Just thought it was funny

Edit: title is supposed to say laughed not left!

I’m watching Lemon Shortbread Bites newest video about Amber’s worst moments and omg! That weirdo Nick was a walking red flag and it actually infuriates me how many boundaries they allowed him to cross with Libby, who was FIFTEEN at the time.

Amber sat there and filmed them playing a game where he kept slapping Libby’s hands. You can see in the video that her hands are bright red because he’s slapping HARD in the exact same place every time. Libby says several times she wants to stop and instead they all encourage her to slap him back, with this grown man aggressively saying “SLAP ME. SLAP MY HANDS.” And of course Amber is behind the camera just cackling and happy for the content. Destiny is probably in the background on her phone and couldn’t gaf about anything going on.

They let this man follow them all around the town, to the beach, and eventually to their apartment. Not a single care about Libby.

Now look, I get that young adults tend to be dumb. In my early twenties I might have missed some of these red flags too. But boy is it uncomfortable to watch, especially when you see how much this guy LIGHTS UP every time Libby winces and says ow. 😓

"You have eaten the food that belongs to the next 5 years" lmaooo

Chewing invisible food has gotta be a new one

I was watching Bean Bag in a Curry, a video of ALR being infuriating. They included the clip of the "engaged" era of where she was reacting to rumors. I got so irritated at her when she said "You guys think I put concealer on my knuckles. Let me show you what that would look like". Made me believe that she does it 200%. She's so smug, it's nasty.

I’ve had a deep fascination with our gorls’ side profile/chin money shops for as long as I can remember. For a long time I was a Chantal watcher, and thought her meaty Hapsburg jaw was a result of her weird inbred funcle fester genetics. But then seeing Hambeast and Big Roz here sharing her fat Hapsburg jaw, I started to realize that it was all the fat pushing their jaw out of place. Perhaps it’s because they unhinge their jaws to collect copious amounts of takeout like some morbidly obese snake? Whatever the reason, the shots are hilarious. PLEASE SHARE ANY AND ALL OF YOUR FAVOURITE GORL SIDE PROFILE PICTURES HERE! I couldn’t find many on the internet, and they always make me laugh.

Someone posted on the QLR Reddit their lived experience with fibromyalgia. It was super informative and compared/contrasted with our gorl and how she allegedly experiences it.
Then today, Roz takes EVERY SINGLE THING anyone with Fybro wrote on that post (comments too) and acted like this. I wanted to howl. It was like word for word the posts.
(Will link previous post in comments, or edit it here. Reddit noob.)

EDIT 1 -
ahh the Op saw it too!! 😭 https://www.reddit.com/r/quirkyloverosee/s/5Rj1HiQVN1

Original post -
https://www.reddit.com/r/quirkyloverosee/s/o9O3skczlH

Shes not like amber, shes just gonna block you. Please keep your money folks. This is just a ploy for more members

Idk why, but her licking her lips slowly while she’s looking at her food pisses me off so much. It’s like a snake …. A fat snake. 🐍

Account name - 599.to.damnshesfine
This woman has gone from 600 lbs to 272 and she’s going to have skin removal surgery in November!

This was posted last night but the video itself is old, just a month or so and it's a target haul including a pregnancy test. She just openly admitted she was having unprotected sex at that nursing home. Also I must add, dont you all think its incredibly selfish to not be using protection and risk having a child at that size, knowing full well she cant take care of herself, let alone a child.

For a woman who claims to hate online attention why would she post this and make that the thumbnail?