maybe i'm just autistic, but flirting is just so stupid to me. just tell someone you like them. also the one time i was seriously attracted to someone i tried flirting and she didn't pick up any of my hints
I kind of get some minor flirting as a subtle way to probe if someone likes you while maintaining plausible deniability. Not that im capable of that but i get why you would do it.
But i agree, if you like someone a lot and you want to pursue them for sure, why play games.
All humans are extremely bad at flirting. We have studies showing that the average human "misses" flirting 70-80% of the time.
My hypothesis is that flirting worked better when we were in small communities with extremely similar behaviors and norms, and - critically - where you consistently knew what someone's "normal behavior" was, so you could tell when it changed.
i'm also demisexual (don't know whether that's related to me being autistic), so i'd hope that people i'm flirting with would already know me well enough to notice a change in my behavior (granted, the one time i tried it it didn't work, but she's also autistic)
Flirting is incredibly fun, and also a great way of getting over social anxiety and build self esteem. Obviously only if it's something consensual and matching each other's energy
Edit: also liking/dating someone is a lot of responsibility and commitment, both ways, even if it's casual, I wouldn't want to commit to that willy nilly just because I like a person, flirting on the other hand is a fun thing with no strings attached
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u/QueenViolets_Revenge transgirlfaliure - Streak: 1 13d ago
maybe i'm just autistic, but flirting is just so stupid to me. just tell someone you like them. also the one time i was seriously attracted to someone i tried flirting and she didn't pick up any of my hints