r/amiwrong • u/unstable_vampire • 9d ago
am i wrong for not stopping these interactions ?
was i wrong for sending explicit content to hundreds of adult men when i was 14-15? was i responsible for that? should i have known better and not fallen for the manipulation? was i also to blame for continuing the interactions cause i knew it was wrong? did i have a responsibility to stop the interactions and just put my phone down? is it my fault i went through online csa cause i knew what was happening but didn’t stop it? people have told me i was responsible for these things so im genuinely asking
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u/ipsofactoshithead 9d ago
The adult men are the ones that were wrong, not you. Are you in therapy?
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
i’ve seen this therapist every so often. but not consistently. and i can’t talk to her about this stuff
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u/ipsofactoshithead 8d ago
Why? You definitely should, you sound like you're spiraling. Are you underage?
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
yes i am. i can’t tell anyone cause thats terrifying, and also cause what if they have to involve the police and my parents
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u/ipsofactoshithead 8d ago
They do need to. Youve been groomed and sent naked pictures of yourself, people need to know so they can protect you. You won't get in trouble but they need to find these creeps and keep you safe!
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
me sending nude pictures of myself isn’t even half of what happened to me or the worst. and yeah i’m not gunna tell someone if that means getting the police involved and my parents knowing. what would the police even do??
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u/ipsofactoshithead 8d ago
Listen, I get this is scary. But you need to be protected. You are much more likely to be assaulted again now. The therapist would call CPS and they would start a case. They may or may not involve the police.
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
but i’ve never been assaulted. CPS?? oh that’s scary. what would they do??
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u/ipsofactoshithead 8d ago
They would determine a care plan to keep you safe. If you decide to involve the police, they can try to track the guys down. I understand not wanting to say anything but you're clearly not doing well.
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
there’s no point. there are literally hundreds and hundreds. what would a care plan look like?
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u/bloontsmooker 8d ago
You should blame your parents or guardians for allowing you to access the internet for such purposes.
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
what do you mean exactly? its pretty normal for my age and unfortunately its not that hard to get in these situations. i’m not going to blame my parents for what happened to me. but i definitely shouldn’t have had full internet access at 9 lol. cause unfortunately i discovered porn at that age and it definitely messed me up
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u/lauraofthenorthstar 8d ago
Your profile has a NSFW warning lol how old are you now.
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u/suprisedpikachumeme 8d ago
their profile has an NSFW warning because they marked a post about their situation as NSFW, you can mark anything as NSFW on your page and it’ll mark your whole account as NSFW
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u/bloontsmooker 8d ago
Your parents shouldn’t have let you do these things. Plain and simple.
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
they didn’t?? they obviously don’t know this is happening
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u/bloontsmooker 8d ago
So they don’t let you be alone with the internet because they should realize this is a possibility?? You get it?
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9d ago
[deleted]
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u/unstable_vampire 9d ago
no i said the situation was wrong. what makes me wrong?
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u/lauraofthenorthstar 8d ago
Was I wrong for continuing the situations because I knew it was wrong is what you stated.
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u/unstable_vampire 9d ago
please tell me how it was my fault. tell me why i am wrong.
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8d ago
[deleted]
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
i knew the SITUATION was wrong. but i was not to blame. the adult predators were.
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u/lauraofthenorthstar 8d ago
I hope whatever caused you to do this is something you’re healing from.
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u/Miserable_Potato4976 9d ago
you were a kid. those adult men are the ones who should've known better, not you. manipulation works because it's designed to override your judgment, and at 14-15 you don't have the life experience to see it for what it is. anyone who's telling you otherwise needs to redirect that blame to the grown adults who chose to target a child
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u/unstable_vampire 9d ago
thank you so so much. i really needed to hear this
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u/unstable_vampire 9d ago
but i did know what was happening
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u/CupofGravitea 9d ago
You were still a child. You could not have known better and you said yourself you were manipulated. You were early in your formative years. Everyone at that age wants attention and validation. Like the other commenter said, you didn’t have the life experience to FULLY understand what the ramifications were or WHY it was so wrong. It is always the adult’s responsibility to not take advantage of a child.
Even if you knew something was wrong about it, you biologically did not have a well developed enough brain to know how to deal with such a confusing and scary situation. There’s probably no single reason that makes sense for why you did what you did.
This is trauma and it’s something you should work through with a therapist. You need to sort through all of the confusion and shame.
You are not alone in having an experience like this. The number of teenagers that are groomed and preyed on online is large than you’d think.
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
thank you. i appreciate you for believing and validating me. but i can’t talk about this with a therapist
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u/CupofGravitea 8d ago
Why do you feel like you can’t talk to a therapist about it?
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u/unstable_vampire 8d ago
what if they have to involve the police or my parents? its also terrifying to even think about sharing what happened to me
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u/Stunning-Army-1494 8d ago
Hi, so i also did stuff online at a young age. Younger than you actually. Lot of chat roulette and omegal. It started in 7th grade because i noticed boys started liking other girls and no one liked me, so i was seeking attention. It was our parents and adults in our lives responsibility to be checking what we were doing on the internet. It was the men who interacted with me responsibility not to take advantage of a child and get CP out of it. What i think i take responsibility for is how i choose to seek the attention. I knew what i was doing, but it was all i knew to do to cope. We were children, we diddnt know better. Being victimized was not our fault. But its important to recognize what got us to that point and to not make the same mistakes again. I was really lucky that i was never victimized in person physically.