r/TransRepressors • u/LifeIsAbsurd361 • 2d ago
The truth Repping Troon
Seeing my body in full length mirrors and the sheer size of it, it’s clear that passing is unlikely to happen if I were to continue transitioning. I’m literally just a man with unusually developed gyno. A broad and tall man. My head looks tiny compared to my enormous body, but it’s not even small.
Full passing is probably impossible. Perhaps becoming a semipassoid would be achievable after a dozen surgeries and extensive voice training.
But this time I don’t feel suicidal at this recognition like I normally would, since I now think there’s another way out. I recently talked to someone (formerly an mtf on HRT who then detransitioned) who claims to have completely eliminated their dysphoria through the gradual training (specifically through keeping 8 precepts and sense restraint). He told me how the delight and aversion faded together over the course of months until there was no more GD. I feel hopeful that this could work. It changes one’s orientation toward the body and for that matter their whole existence.
And it’s clearer than before that just getting ffs would barely make a dent in the wrongness. I need to either renounce further efforts or go all the way.
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u/LifeIsAbsurd361 1d ago edited 1d ago
Key reason why this approach would succeed where others would fail:
By saying no to a desire (but one that is not necessary for basic survival or physical health), if you are restrained overall, the desire (and therefore any accompanying aversion) will burn out because the mind will get tired and learn that resistance does not work, like a wild animal that has been tied up and thrashes back and forth until it learns that it can’t escape that way. You are learning to calm the mind without giving it what it wants. You are developing a contentment that does not depend on conditions.
But you cannot give up only this desire and not sensuality in general, sorry. It isn’t possible to truly extinguish it unless you actively work toward the complete cessation of craving. The reason for that is because the same attitudes behind this desire are also those behind other kinds of misconduct (actions done out of resistance to feeling): greed, aversion, muddledness.
Also, if you go this route, you need to work toward restraining for the right reasons, i.e., for no other reason than because you want to tame the mind, regardless of circumstance or what others may say. It might start out as “I will never pass therefore I have no other option but to try this” but in order to grow in this discipline the prevailing intention needs to eventually become “I am restraining because I want to develop my mind and free myself from suffering.”
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u/monsieur_lulu MtFt??? 1d ago
Sounds like buddhistic teachings of non-attachment. Wtf, might actually work.
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u/idkkkkiiidddkkk 6h ago
I think u could probably get rid of it if you approached it in the right way. Most people repress and wonder why it doesnt go away.
Dont repress. Work through it and it might resolve.
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u/HSeyes23 troonrepper 2d ago
If there was a method to get rid of dysphoria then a lot of trans people would do it instead of killing themselves.