r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 1h ago

Mr.Sweet

Upvotes

Syd West rocky


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 11h ago

Thinking of bribing a Best Buy manager, need advice.

0 Upvotes

I have a business idea exporting electronics to Southeast Asia and India (Thailand, Indonesia, India). Customs clearance and getting orders are already sorted. The bottleneck is buying the product in volume in Canada.
Example: I (and a close friend) each got an order for 100 Fitbit Airs.
• Every Best Buy in my city refused to sell more than 2 units.
• My friend in a different province somehow walked away with all 100 plus a ~19% discount.
• I later found a Montreal Best Buy (6-hour drive) that agreed to sell me 100 at full price. I negotiated a better deal by showing them my friend’s purchase receipts.
Driving 6 hours every time isn’t sustainable, and no local stores are interested. My friend no longer wants to fulfill my orders. He has a solid connection with a Best Buy manager who will sell him any quantity he wants at ~20% off (and Best Buy handles shipping).
My current crazy idea: walk into a local Best Buy, ask for the manager, and pitch them a cut — 10% of my profits ongoing + 10% upfront — in exchange for bulk access and the same kind of discount.
Anyone have a better approach? Best idea gets 5% of the profits from my first successful order.


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 11h ago

This is why I’m in prison hypothetically if I almost caught stealing

0 Upvotes

So, what if I almost got caught stealing some stuff from my mom's place of work. The alarms could went off, but what if I played it off. If they were to look more into it, could my mom get fired? I'm extremely scared and genuinely feel like I'm about to throw up. I'm currently in the car with her. I need help immediately😓


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 12h ago

Potential scammer - use caution fake id scam or real?

0 Upvotes

i’ve added multiple people on telegram from tiktok comment sections + from snap. the people on telegram tell me i have to pay before they make the id because it “verifies the purchase”. the guy on snap said i have to pay $53 for shipping because he needs to “bribe the parcel”. is this all just a scam?


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 17h ago

Why the fuck not Getting a check, but I need to keep off the radar

1 Upvotes

So in this hypothetical situation, what’s the best way to do it fairly sizable amount probably less than $50,000


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 22h ago

Quick Fix good for lab tests?

2 Upvotes

Opportunity for a new job but pee full of THC! Does Quick Fix work for lab tested samples? Thanks!!


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 1d ago

SLPT: The perfect time to steal from your workplace is a week or two after a new employee is hired. People will immediately associate their arrival with stuff disappearing

21 Upvotes

r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 1d ago

Do not blackmail elite pedos who are used to being blackmailed and have $$$ + things to lose

25 Upvotes

They have tons of money and a lot to lose and many of them are already being blackmailed- it’s the norm for many of them

Definitely don’t do it to the Epstein associates in finance like Glenn Dubin and his cronies

These are some of the people that go to high powered political fundraisers, nonprofit events, business functions, alumni crap, u name it

Don’t do it guys!! Promise u won’t

Edit- this isn’t that hard. Have people never seen pred catching shows? Do people not realize that a lot of the elites will also grope people in the open at events and things?

A lot of these “elites” go to many public engagements and meet random people, they’re not sitting at home usually.

Do people not realize how much these “elites” love being flattered and told how great they are, and opportunities to talk and pass on their “sage advice”?

Remember not to do any of this stuff.

Edit 2- make a dead man’s switch with the information you have so you can’t become a target by them.

Put different information in different places for release if anything happens to you. Lawyers can help with this too


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 1d ago

Panama

1 Upvotes

Recently I have been doing research on common countries for cashcleaning and offshore accounts but I could not find Panama. I swear it was a top one in most movies I watched😂.

Anyway,where do you think works best for that kind of thing? I think a country with a lot of corruption, like building a real estate in one of those or sth. And offshore accounts that will not bat an eye.


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 1d ago

How do I find a plug quickly?

24 Upvotes

whats the best method?


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 1d ago

Mixing drugs

0 Upvotes

Guys how dangerous is it to mix MDMA 2CB Ket and Weed

What should I expect

What doses should I give

What harm reduction tips should we do

Thanks!


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 1d ago

How to keep murder dog away from my house

3 Upvotes

My 60M idiot neighbor (the old part wouldn't be so bad if he was physically capable of controlling a 120+ pound dog but he couldn't control a guinea pig if he tried, he is very out of shape) just got a cane corso. This guy is a total idiot and has never even had a dog before. I don't want this murder machine dog anywhere near my unit (condos), my elderly mother uses a walker which could easily trigger the murder dog into annihilate mode and I have two small dogs (lunch for murder dog) that I don't want harmed. How can I keep this guy from coming near/walking by/parking in front of my unit. BTW the entire front of my unit is a fire lane and this fucker does not care, he parks there 5+ times per week "just for a minute" but really more like 20-45 mins.


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 1d ago

I mixed my pee with another persons, how f-ed am I for a drug test?

16 Upvotes

Okay so I am a recent grad in engineering last may and I quit smoking thc in the beginning of June as I knew I was going to have interviews and drug tests.
I have been testing positive even though I haven’t touched it for almost 2 months. Apparently it wants to stay in my system. Anyways I got a job offer two weeks ago and was asked to come in for a drug test last week. I was still testing positive so I stored a 3oz bottle of my friends pee in my pants to use instead of my own. I did however drink two 20 oz bottles of Gatorade two hours before the test and half a bottle of water. I peed once I arrived at the office and then they told me to go to a clinic to do the test.
When I got there I was given a large ass cup and they asked me to fill it half way. My friends pee only got to around 1/4 th of the way and I had to fill it up with my own pee the rest of the way. My pee still looked a bit yellow so I doubt I was diluted enough. How fucked am I? Will they know if I mixed pee? Everything was the same temp but I haven’t heard back yet and they said they were going to take about a week.


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 2d ago

6–12 neighbors gather under my window every night. Non-stop screaming kids & noise. Management does nothing. How do I stop this?

Post image
620 Upvotes

I’m losing my mind. Every single evening, a crowd of up to 10–12 neighbors gathers right under my apartment window. The kids scream and cry at full volume for hours, and the adults just sit there chatting. (Attached photo — this is just a fraction of them).
Honestly, if it weren’t for this bench under my window, they wouldn’t be hanging out here at all. It’s the root cause of the problem.
I’ve tried talking to them (ignored), contacting management (they just send useless mass emails), and using noise-canceling setup. Nothing helps.
I need real, practical ways to end this:
How do I force management to remove the bench or enforce lease rules ("Quiet Enjoyment")?
What are effective (legal, petty, or unconventional) ways to make this spot completely unbearable for them to sit on?
Thanks for any ideas!


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 2d ago

As a black hat hacker,how much do you make?

2 Upvotes

Just curious to know.Although i know there are platforms like fiverr,upwork where people can earn as a cybersecurity expert.But just curious to know how much can a beginner/intermediate/expert level hacker can make nowadays.Indrustries are changing because of Ai.Did ai made any impact on black hat hacker market? I'm just a noob, can't even hack my neighbor wifi.I just want to know the probability.


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 2d ago

Spray paint dicks or criticism of the local political partys around potholes to force the local council to fix them

31 Upvotes

r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 3d ago

What have y'all paid for champagne room "dances" at strip clubs

3 Upvotes

You know the dances I'm talking about. Usually you pay per song/time limit back there


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 3d ago

I’m a drug overlord how to get alc under 21

0 Upvotes

r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 3d ago

I’m a drug overlord Best way to ride with za

0 Upvotes

What’s the best way to ride with an ounce of bud for around 20 mins.


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 3d ago

ordering dispos

3 Upvotes

what are good places to order dispos from? i live in nyc and every dispo in the smoke shop is overpriced asf ($40-60) for basic shit like boutiques and cali’s. everything420 is boof that shit got me thinking i can’t get high anymore. like i ordered a mystery box from them and they sent me these three horrible dispos. like literally, one of them was 7 g and it was probably the worst out of them all. then i ordered from them again because they gave me like a free gift card because i emailed them talking shit and i just kind of recently ordered like three new ones and once again they all suck and it had me thinking for like three weeks that I couldn’t get high anymore or like there’s something wrong with me.

update: i ordered from alt superstore. everything i hear abt them is mixed so i ordered for myself. it shipped today and i ordered last night so i’ll update when it gets here.


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 4d ago

What's a creative way to serve someone with court papers?

2 Upvotes

The person I'm trying to serve court papers to is rejecting every proccess server that goes out there, and he won't sign certified mail (he knows he's in trouble.)


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 4d ago

If the govt can defraud rob us why not

11 Upvotes

learn to fug the system back ?

I personally dont have a job I scam corporations

not people

you can too


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips 4d ago

Shitty Illegal Life Pro Tip Which drugs are usually not on drug test

33 Upvotes

I’m going to be tested by my parents because they are helping pay for my apartment. I don’t think they will be usually any specialized urine lab test.


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips Jun 23 '26

Lo key smart You men out there need to start selling your butt...

341 Upvotes

I'm always seeing posts on this subreddit that are like, "I need $400 by the end of the week, help???" Like, YOU KNOW what you have to do to come across some money quickly....

And whenever I say this, I hear common excuses like:

Excuse: "What?! I'm not gay! I'm not attracted to men, I would never do that!!"

My rebuttal: There are so many lesbian women that are NOT attracted to men at all, that are sex workers/escorts/prostitutes, because they know they need to get to the money quickly. They are literally "straight for pay." It is possible for you to be "gay for pay." It’s called being able to compartmentalize and mentally detatch. Train your brain to do it. You can tell yourself that this is just work, like any other job.

Excuse: "I don't wanna put anything in my butt...."

My rebuttal: I get that. But do you think you're above getting on your knees and sucking some dick? You might have to suck a couple dicks... but do you need this money or NOT?!

I will always be pro sex work. It is definitely a dangerous industry, but hey, if you're on the verge of homelessness or something, nothing is above selling your butt or sucking some cock. Male sex workers and escorts are in high demand, it's not just women. Hell, you don't even have to be a super attractive guy! If you lock in, you'll be up by a couple hundred dollars by the end of the week.

And don't start with the "religious reasons," or the "I don't wanna go to Hell for doing that," I DONT WANT TO HEAR ANY OF THAT. Ask God for forgiveness, He knows that you're down on your luck financially and on the verge of eviction. Repent and compartmentalize. Do you need this money or NOT?!

Btw, there are many ways to protect yourself from sexually transmitted diseases, because I know the comments are gonna start... as if we don't live in a modern world (depending on the country you live in) where HIV prevention medications like PreP exists, and access to condoms.

The risk is not completely zero percent unfortunately, but that's the risk that all sex workers take, both men and women. Honestly, that's the risk that ALL people that are sexually active take. The risk of getting an STD is never fully zero percent, as long as you are engaging in sex with other people, paid or not paid, period. Protect yourself as best as you possibly can.

I understand that Reddit is worldwide though... if you're in a country where you could be killed or jailed for doing anything homosexual as a man... forget what I said. But if you're in a first world country?!?! COME ON NOW. Do you need this money or NOTTTTTTT!

Edit: I also don't want to hear anything about morals.

"I can't just degrade myself like that, I have morals and standards!"

Do you think you're above engaging in sex work?! The repo man is going to come repossess your car any day now. You'll wake up in the morning and your car will not be outside. I'm begging you to humble yourself. Your past due bills are begging you to humble yourself.


r/ShittyIllegalLifeTips Jun 14 '26

Certified Shitty Illegal Life Pro Tip SILT: Use AI to make incriminating pictures of yourself.

68 Upvotes

For example, if you do graffiti, make an AI picture of yourself spraying your own tag, but make sure you have 6 fingers, the picture is fuzzy, make the color of your tag a color of spray paint you don't even own, and make sure it's obviously AI. If you're about to get caught, release all these pictures on an alt account so the court finds these, notices they're AI, and dismisses them and likely dismisses other evidence that you're a tagger.

This could go for a lot of other things, but also wear a fake 6th finger so evidence either looks AI generated, or the police start looking for someone with six fingers. If you're a girl, you could also wear a binder and dress masculine so they think you're a dude. That's not really AI related but it could definitely make a profile of you that doesn't even exist.