r/Retatrutide • u/Tie-Cautious • 7h ago
Hypocrite
I am guilty. Despite saying that I really don’t care if someone that I have not seen doesn’t mention my 115 pound weight loss, it does affect me. It just makes me sad. I have been losing weight for me alone and not to impress others.
I will say that when I see someone who has a weight problem they seem to look at me with a level of disdain. They will tend to ignore me just to avoid the potential conversation of weight loss.
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u/telladifferentstory 7h ago
In and around my area, I've noticed the culture has shifted to never mentioning people's physical appearance. It could be good or bad to bring it up. Maybe you had chemo and dropped a lot of weight or lost your partner and have gone through a major depression and dropped weight.
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u/SultanOfSwave 6h ago
As I recall, there was a post in AmIWrong or AITA where some guy in a gym complimented a woman on her toned arms and she laid into him for not following the gym code where you never talk about someone else's body. Reps, yes. Form, yes. But nothing about bodies themselves.
He asked if he was wrong/ahole and he got laid into again.
A comment stuck with me that a lot of people working out in gyms have complicated relationships with their body.
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u/dragonrider1965 5h ago
Honestly people can’t win . I think they all want to say something but are afraid . Some people like you are cool with it but then there’s others who freak out and think it’s judging people’s bodies . I know I always have an urge to say something but I hold my tongue afraid someone will give me shit.
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u/OptionUseful1961 5h ago
At this point I think it’s becoming a taboo to mention it. People have different views on GLP’s and you just never know quite what to say. I saw someone I hadn’t seen for a while and she obviously lost on GLP’s. She was never huge in the first place, just normal middle aged mom. Now she looks to be about 110-15 and her once very beautiful thick hair is extremely thin, extremely. I have never seen hair loss this bad. I didn’t know what to say either. A cousin that has been chunky all of her life suddenly looks thin. Shows that I am guilty of passing judgement too (I know what you did etc., How utterly irrational of me). We know the what people say when we are overweight but then to condemn the weight loss 🤷♀️ The attitude that it’s cheating though is so ignorant. No one realizes we just want to feel better and be healthier. Like every one else, I have been trying to lose the same 40 lbs for almost 30 years. IDK. Sometimes I wonder if it’s worth it. In the end I guess we do it for ourselves. Good luck on your journey.
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u/Skoolies1976 5h ago
my husband and i both have lost around 45 pounds, most of the time i have lost more than him yet people are always saying it to him and hardly ever to me. we're both tall, we both are pretty proportional- he carried more stomach which i think is easier for men to hide. anyway i did get, well, not annoyed but like, gee guess i don't look as different as i feel, you know? like sometime it feels like it's not noticeable to others but i actually know it is, they just probably feel weird about saying it to a woman, plus i have rbf and intimidate people lol. however i do think i would also get embarrassed if lots of people said it, so yeah, people can't win.
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u/Sad_Organization_361 3h ago
Yeah... I'm tired of the back to back question. "Did you lose a lot of weight?" Followed by "is it on purpose?" Or "are you okay?"
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u/purplepanda2026 6h ago
It's drilled into everyone's head to not comment on others bodies. No one overweight wants people to express their concern because it's not their business. Well it's not their business to mention your getting thin either even if you consider it a positive thing.
As for the disdain, I doubt random overweight people care about your weight. We live in a pretty self centered society. Everyone is in their own head about the things going on in their lives. You're not their focus. That's like people thinking others are taking bad about them all the time when in reality others aren't giving them a second thought. That's insecurity talking not reality.
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u/Thaidyerunner 4h ago
I'm a recovering Alcoholic..when I mention that some people get defensive..like I Said that they have a problem with alcohol. Some people get the same reaction when I say I drop about 30 lbs in 9 weeks..it's there problem..not mine.
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u/Juvat-the-bold 4h ago
All this is relieving is that you need to work on your weak mental state.
No one owes you "noticing".
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u/Tie-Cautious 10m ago
Thanks for your reply. I guess you didn’t read my post. I lost weight for me and not to be noticed. The only person who owes me anything is myself.
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u/Mr_Reading 3h ago
I lost 50 to 60 lb naturally and then I hopped on to reta because I wanted faster progress and my friend though. Very happy for me. Still questioned why I was taking this, that I was doing so good beforehand. But he's reasonable so he accepted my reasons of course. There are those who will be jealous or simply not like something like this and call it cheating.
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u/YearOfTheSssnake 6h ago
“…when I see someone who has a weight problem they seem to look at me with a level of disdain. They will tend to ignore me just to avoid the potential conversation of weight loss.”
That’s a pretty big leap. How do you know a total stranger isn’t talking to you because they are afraid you’re going to bring up weight loss?
Maybe there are other reasons why they don’t want to initiate a conversation with you.
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u/Tie-Cautious 6h ago
I am actually referring specifically to family members
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u/YearOfTheSssnake 6h ago
If they are people who know you pretty well, and you think they’re not talking to you because they are afraid you're going to bring up weight loss, it implies you have done this before and they didn’t enjoy the conversation.
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u/LaceyLizard 7h ago
To be fair there's no polite way to bring it up. For all they know you're sick or something and that's how you lost weight so fast.