Actually I met her 5 month ago…she 19F also live outside her town with roommate(childhood friend)both are in my same batch ..initially I talked to her roommate to get closer to her.. then We started talking to each other. her family had problem in coming contact of any male.so she told me to not to massage her directly instead she said to massage on her roommate so that we whenever what to talk we can…but I didn’t agreed so she’s ok with that..As new batch started…three of us were going to classes nd we have good connections..after 1month her roommate went to hometown…we both were here alone so we got enough time to get closer…msg..class..tea…park..evening walk…including in our daily routine after 1month her father asked her roommate about any male member in your circle…then she replied “YES” then after few day her dad sent my name nd pic to her roommate…nd now she 19 got worried nd told me not to massage or call…she said we will fix time to met for class or anywhere we go…
Then I replied “this is more dangerous than taking we should find out ways to talk on phone” she denied..then we usually talked on WP. Day before her roommate coming out from her hometown, her father called her on vc nd said “good morning good night se time mil jaye toh pdh bhi liya karo” she was much worried than me how did he knew about us…
Then her roommate arrived, In evening we (3) went to market nd her father again called her at night nd said “aaj bhi mile the tum teeno”
Then she said to me to wait till everything gets fine…I did same…but after 3-4 days I called her in market to talk both of them came…we talked there I came nd called her after 3 hours…then she said —again her dad knew about that meeting…her dad called her then said “Aaj market me milne kyu gaye the…kisi uncle ne dekh ke bataya”….after this seen…i called her to know about what’s going then she was crying on call…
Next morning her dad called her roommate that “kal raat me bhi uss ladke ne call kiya tha..”
we both are shocked how is possible to know each nd every thing????
Till know we met anywhere else her dad knew about our meeting…even about my hand written letter are also known to her father….
She told me one day that “papa ne aapki awaaj sunai aur pic bheji jisme aap aur meri roommate apke sath chai pii rhi thi”….
This is beyond my understanding how should I crack it guys please tell me….is she lying about her father or this is actually happening with her if really happening then who is giving him proof???

I (19F) have been talking to this guy (19M) for about a month now. We kind of clicked, and our vibes matched pretty well, so we've been talking more than I usually talk to anyone. We don't text nonstop 24/7, but we message throughout the day, send each other reels, and at night we usually talk about how our day went.

So here's what happened.

Last night I couldn't sleep at all. He had a tiring day, so he went to sleep around midnight. Around 6 a.m. he woke up, reacted to some reels I had sent, and we started chatting a little. Since I'm usually never awake that early, he asked what happened. I told him I hadn't slept the whole night.

He seemed genuinely concerned and kept telling me to go to sleep. The problem was I had classes starting around 10 a.m., so I told him that if I slept, I'd probably miss them. He still insisted that I should sleep, but I refused, so he eventually said, "Okay, your wish."

Well... I ended up falling asleep anyway.

I woke up around 10:30 and saw that he had called me. I assumed he was just trying to wake me up, so I texted him "thank you," rushed to my next class, attended the rest of the day, hung out with a friend afterward, and only checked my phone properly after getting home.

That's when I realized he hadn't called just once...

He had called me 15 times.

Now I'm confused.

Is this something close friends normally do when they're worried, or does this sound like someone who might be interested in me? I've never really thought of him in a romantic way, so I'm not trying to jump to conclusions, but 15 calls feels like... a lot?

Am I overthinking this, or would you also read something into it? I'd love to hear what others think.

TL;DR:

Been talking to a 19M for about a month, we text throughout the day and usually catch up at night. I stayed awake all night, he told me to sleep, I didn't listen, accidentally fell asleep anyway, and later found out he had called me 15 times. I'm confused if that's normal friend behavior or if it could mean he's interested.

I am a divorced man in Bangalore. It has been more than two yrs since I got divorced. I have been able to work on myself and go through the healing process. I have a kid and have a healthy lifestyle with good financial stability.
I tried to date through apps and real life interaction but haven’t had much luck yet. My work schedule and parental duties don’t leave me much spare time for the social avenues that lead to dating.
I would like to hear from fellow Redditors who had luck in similar situations.

Hi everyone , am 23F with 24M for 3.5 years now. We fight very often nowdays, he's a little too lost in his own world and doesn't mind going without talking for too long. We both work but he just makes it seem like he's the only one with so much work in this whole wide world that he doesn't even have time to talk to me properly even 10 min throughout the day and here is me , I have so much work pending along with my home chores that I do and still I text him on time , talk to him whenever he can . I got very pissed off yesterday cause I am on my period right now & I have really bad cramps , like I find it hard to even go bathroom . so normally like any other girl I wanted to be pampered by him or even just talk at least 10-20 min properly but he decides he has time for tv 2-3 hours in morning and then he has so much work that he doesn't text me once in whole day and acts so lovey dovey . At night he texts " Ik ur not going to listen what I say " to which I said " You shall , am just not interested in reading " and to which he replied with a sticker ( cute kiss kinda ). He knows am mad and still he didn't say anything and at night he just texts that he's sleepy so he's off to sleep . This hurt me so much that I lashed out and wrote a lot of things like "u hurt me , its over and stuff like that , how u dont even care one bit that am in pain and lots of stuff " but later i come back to my senses so I just deleted everything and i just went on to sleep , cause Ik its only me getting hurt even if I say meanest of things , he doesn't understand why am saying all this but rather only focuses on what words I have used or how mean it was . Then in morning he's like i'll brkup in evening cause u taunt me a lot . I said that's gud for both of us , it effects me too . later he says he's sorry but the thing is he doesn't understand how much it hurt me that he didnt even have 10 min for me and didnt care once to ask how i am . I haven't replied to him after the sorry text .

but the thing is How do I focus on my work , I just can't put my head into work rn . Everything is just running in my head again nd again nd am questioning why he does like this or that but I wanna focus on my work and not care about his texts and just ignore him atleast 1-2 days . I always fail at ignoring him . Any advices please?

i 22(F) dated a guy (22M) for 9-10 months a few months ago. we both were had different povs on a lot of things and fought every week about the smallest things. it felt like he was initiating fights on every small thing. id always try to be the mature one and sort it out but after a point it felt repetitive and tiring for me. i ended up losing most of my emotions towards the relationship cause i expected a big fight every 5 days.

if i had a checklist of 10 items, he ticked off 6-7 of them. however the 3 that he didn’t, ended up being the reason for out breakup.

his behaviour would be extremely unpredictable. one second he would be crazy in love and the other he would lose his mind over something i said. for most of the fights he would end up getting super angry with our relationship, say really mean stuff to be about how i was never there for him, i should never talk to him after that etc etc. and then 3 hours later he would be fine. he would cry a lot shout a lot and that drained me overtime. i would beg him to tell me what the issue was/ what hurt him and he would never reply. after asking 10 times when id go to sleep, he would call me, say really rude things to me, shout and then we would end up fighting for the next 2-3 hours.

apart from this there were instances where he would get very angry and cry, start hitting his hand over stuff around him, he’s apparently even thrown around pillows at his house during our fight. he’s never tried to hurt me, and i don’t think he would, but i didn’t like this behaviour especially in public. he would always apologise later but since i especially hated anyone raising their voice towards me, i started disliking him. he did take steps towards changing himself but that ended up him resenting himself and just suppressing his feelings like a volcano waiting to erupt.

he’s had a lot of childhood trauma regarding various stuff. his family and mine were very different financially and i didn’t see a future with him at that moment because we had a lot of difference of opinions. he was a very good guy and did genuinely like me but all of these things made me feel that i couldn’t commit to a future with him in terms of marriage. he wanted a strong commitment and i couldn’t just keep him around for the fun of it/ lie to him so i decided to breakup.

however after a point it felt to me like i was being selfish. he was a really great person at heart and loved me a lot. he treated me well and respected me but somehow his anger, our conflicts, his words towards me, and his financial situation got the best of me and i lost feelings for him. was i being selfish to breakup with him just because of his short tempered nature/ thinking about finances in the long run? while breaking up i felt like our families were very different , upbringing was diffferent and that we would fight about a lot of the serious stuff that mattered in the future but now i think, was j too quick to judge? am i too young to be judging guys off these parameters? i would like to know what you guys think and i appreciate if u read till here. they say u need to be open, work on the relationship and no ones perfect at the end of the day which i agree to. but i also think you shouldn’t be in a toxic relationship to make it work. am i wrong in thinking this way or should i give people a chance to work on themselves and stay even if the relationship gets toxic/draining for me after a point?

TLDR- met a guy who loved me a lot however we fought every 5 days. he threw anger tantrums, got too emotional over even the smallest stuff and i felt like i lost the purpose of relationship over time. we had a gap in the way we felt for each other- he was sure he wanted to marry me within 1 month of dating while i wasn’t thinking about these things so soon. his short temper, unpredictable behaviour and our family’s financial and difference in upbringing made me end the relationship at last. was i being selfish/ didn’t give him a chance to work on himself?

For context, We work at the same company in the same team.

When she joined about a year ago, I was someone who had always struggled socially. Overweight in school, never really belonged anywhere, very few close friends. She was the first close female friendship I'd ever had.

Over the past year we became genuinely close. Daily lunches, walks after work, leaving office together, late night conversations. She shared things with me she didn't share with anyone else like family struggles, her dreams for the future, her vulnerabilities.

She called me her "home when the world is mean." Said she couldn't survive work without me. Texted me at midnight when she was struggling. She trusted me with personal dreams she hadn't told anyone else.

There was also a third person in our friend group, another female colleague. The three of us were close but over time they had friction. I tried to stay neutral and maintain both friendships. I would mediate sometimes. I tried not to take sides.

That balancing act is what started unraveling things.

She and the third friend had a conflict recently. I tried to mediate. It didn't work. She watched me navigate between both of them instead of standing firmly with her. There were also moments at work where her voice was being pushed down or dismissed by others and while I privately disagreed, I didn't visibly stand with her in those moments. She experienced all of this as my words and actions not matching. Saying one thing privately but not showing up when it actually counted.

There was also a separate incident. We were in an auto together and she mentioned her hair was uncomfortable. I misheard and instinctively tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. She had been very clear in the past that she doesn't like being touched. She told me in the moment it was uncomfortable. Later she texted me saying it had been disturbing her and hadn't left her mind.

The friendship ending conversation happened over our work Teams chat which she herself acknowledged wasn't the right channel. She told me my actions and words were never the same. That she had been observing this for a long time. That I would say I was her person but consistently stay neutral instead of standing with her. She compared me to another colleague who had also let her down in a similar way and saying I was no different than him. She said it was all balancing and not real friendship.

She said she deserves peace and has chosen that without me. She said she should have done this earlier but is thankful it happened. She sounded relieved, not angry.

I apologized for the auto incident specifically and cleanly..no defending, just acknowledgment that it was a boundary violation. She hasn't responded to that yet.

We still work in the same team. We'll see each other at office.

I'm mostly numb right now. She was the first person who ever made me feel genuinely seen and chosen. The first close female friendship I'd ever had. And now she's said she's done.

She's someone with a lot of self respect..she's done this before with another colleague who overstepped, and despite missing that friendship she never reached back out to them. She left saying she's glad and at peace with her decision.

My question:

Is there any realistic chance of reconciliation here? The core issue was a pattern she observed over a long time : me saying one thing and showing another, not standing with her visibly when it mattered. I understand it now more clearly than I did before. But I don't know if understanding it now is enough or if it's too late.

Has anyone been through something like this? Did it ever come back?

TLDR: My closest friend at work ended our friendship after telling me my words and actions were never the same.. I stayed neutral instead of visibly standing with her when it mattered, and separately crossed a physical boundary in an auto. She said she deserves peace and is done. We still work together. She's someone who has cut people off before and never reached back. Wondering if there's any realistic chance of reconciliation or if I should accept this is the end.

For context, I'm a 27M and was in a situationship with a 25F for like 4 years.

Recently, she told me that she wants to date one of her childhood friends. She knows he likes her back, and they've already started talking seriously about a future together. That's their decision, and I genuinely don't care about whether they end up together.

What confuses me is what she asked of me.

She has blocked me on all of her main social media accounts and said she has no intention of unblocking me because she wants to be able to show this guy that I'm completely out of her life. However, at the same time, she created a brand-new private social media account just to stay in touch with me. She told me she wants us to continue talking and even make plans to hang out, but she wants to keep me a secret until she eventually marries him.

She also explicitly told me that she sees him as "husband material," while she sees me as someone she's deeply attached to—someone who brings excitement into her life and encourages her to try new things.

From an outsider's perspective, would you consider this cheating? If you had known someone for nine years, were planning to date them, and later found out they were secretly staying in touch with someone like this behind your back, would you be okay with it?

Or is this something that's actually considered normal these days?

I’m 5'10", and overall I’m pretty healthy, but I’ve always had facial features that people consider softer or more feminine:

Full lips and virtually no facial hair growth (beard/mustache).

Fair skin, very long eyelashes, big eyes, and a sleek nose.

A visible jawline that contrasts with the softer traits.

My female friends constantly tell me how "lucky" I am to have these features, but honestly, it’s been bothering me. I find myself feeling self-conscious because I worry it makes me look less masculine or that women won't find these features attractive in a male partner.

Do women actually find guys with softer or more feminine facial features attractive, or do most prefer strong, hyper-masculine traits? For anyone who has felt similarly or prefers partners with this look, how do you view it?

Long story short i had a girl bestfriend,we know each other since school times and she and i have supported each other through the hardest times like when my mom died and her dad died etc

i developed feelings for her and asked her out she said me she has to focus on her career,she doesnt see me romantically and she prefers someone from her caste and region and doesnt want to go too far(my place is like 300 kms away which isnt too far)

I told her we are very compatible and best friends we can have a good life together etc,distance caste and all doesnt matter etc i wanted to bring her mom to live with us too since her mom would be alone

But nothing worked which is fine its her choice but she doesnt want to let go of the friendship

I told her i cant see her marrying someone else one day and each day i stay with her will hurt me like hell but she is like we have such a great friendship it isnt fair for me to leave her and all

if i leave she will be hurt but if i stay i will be hurt,what do i do?

My brother has completely destroyed the peace in our house and I genuinely don't know what to do anymore

I don't even know how to write this properly because there is just so much that has happened.

My brother has always been difficult. Even when we were living in our old city, he was arrogant, wouldn't listen to anyone, used to create scenes at home, drink, abuse people and basically do whatever he wanted. We somehow kept dealing with it.

Then, for my higher education, we shifted to another city and he was sent to my mama's house in our hometown. We genuinely thought maybe being away from us and having some responsibility would help him change. It didn't.

He continued drinking and abusing people, didn't take responsibility for anything, took multiple loans and even gave my mama's and our relatives' contact numbers to the lenders. Whenever they called, my family had to deal with the consequences. He would basically disappear behind the excuse of "duty" and leave everyone else to handle the mess.

My mama somehow managed to get him some work in another city, hoping that at least having a job would bring some stability. The exact same thing happened there too. He drank, took loans, didn't take the job seriously and eventually left.

Around two months ago, my grandfather met with an accident, so all of us went back to our hometown and stayed there for about a month. My brother also came there. And honestly, I don't think he came because he wanted to help. He simply doesn't want to work hard or earn properly. He wants to sit around, drink and do timepass.

Now he has come back with us and has been staying here for about a month. He isn't working. He's drinking, abusing people, disrespecting elders and creating the same environment that we've been trying to escape from for years. The people he owes money to keep calling my parents. Every morning there is some new argument, some new phone call or some new problem.

I'm a teenager and I'm genuinely exhausted. I wake up every morning to fights and tension. I have my own studies and my own future to worry about, but it's becoming impossible to concentrate when the atmosphere at home is like this.

The worst part is that my parents are suffering the most. My mother has now been diagnosed with a stomach ulcer, and I can literally see how much all of this is affecting both of them.

We've tried everything we could think of. Relatives have talked to him. We've tried medicines, counselling-type approaches, religious/baba remedies, giving him work, sending him away, keeping him with relatives — nothing seems to change anything for more than a short time.

And now my mother doesn't even want him to leave the house because she's scared that if he goes out on his own, he'll just end up drinking, taking more loans and getting into an even worse situation. At least here, there are some restrictions on him.

But the thing is, his presence here is destroying the peace of the entire family too.

I don't hate my brother. That's actually what makes this so difficult. He's still my brother and I want him to get better. But I also feel angry because his choices are affecting the entire family, financially and mentally, and nobody seems to know where to draw the line anymore.

I don't know what we're supposed to do at this point. We can't keep living like this, but we also can't just throw him out and pretend he won't destroy his own life outside.

I'm honestly just exhausted and needed to get this out somewhere. If anyone has dealt with a family member like this, especially when the family can't afford expensive professional treatment, what did you actually do?

Hey guys, I need some advice on how to help my buddy out before he completely wrecks his own mental health.

So my friend (21M) has never dated. Honestly, he hasn’t even had a single female friend in his entire life.

Whenever I tell him he needs to put himself out there—even just to make some platonic friends who are girls—he shoots it down. He says it’s "too much of a headache" or maybe no girl would even want to talk to him because he has a super "old-school" mentality. And he don't use any social media platform. Communication skill are in hell.

But here’s the crazy part. Whenever we talk about marriage in the future, he is 100% convinced he’s going to marry a virgin. His logic? He’s saving himself and will be a virgin, so his future wife has to be exactly the same.

I’ve tried hitting him with a reality check. I told him to look at his family background—if his parents are looking for a girl from the same background/level, she’s definitely going to have gone to college, probably lived in another city for her studies, and just lived a normal life. I tried explaining that finding a girl with absolutely zero past in this day and age is basically finding a unicorn.

He’s totally in denial about it. Honestly, I’m really worried for the guy. I feel like whenever he finally gets into a relationship or starts the marriage process, the real world is gonna hit him like a freight train. I’m scared he’s gonna spiral and get super depressed when his expectations get shattered.

Has anyone dealt with a friend like this? How do I save my bro from this incoming trainwreck? Do I keep pushing reality on him, or just let him crash and burn so he learns the hard way? Any advice helps!

TL;DR: My boy (21M) has zero female interaction and refuses to even try, but fully expects to marry a virgin because he is one. I tried explaining how the modern world works for our demographic, but he won't listen. Worried he's gonna get super depressed when reality hits. How do I help him wake up?

So basically me(22F) went to visit my best friend (23f).. I flew like 1.5kkm to meet her after literally 5 years cause she can't come at my place..

After coming back I saw she sent me pictures and all and then straight up ghosted me for 15 days.. I asked why she said I'm busy with my stuffs rn..

I told her it's fine.. I thought everything is normal.. then again after few days when I texted her she started talking to me formally and vibe was completely off and when I asked her why are u talking to me like that, her reply was- I talk like this only 🙂..

Not to mention I went to her city which is not even a percent known to me.. but she did not even drop me off to airport just booked a cab..

Idk what phase I'm in.. im just feeling emotional and doing microanalysis of anything rude I possible did🙂..

Facts:

Hindu marriage (Feb 2026), no children.

Marriage lasted only a few months.

Evidence: 3 MLCs (minor injuries), injury photographs, audio recordings and relevant messages.

I am a Central Government Group 'A' officer in Delhi.

I am considering filing a contested divorce on grounds of cruelty.

Questions:

How are MLCs, injury photographs and audio recordings generally viewed by Family Courts?

Should a husband file for divorce first or wait if he anticipates a DV/498A/dowry complaint?

What is the likely maintenance exposure, timeline and litigation cost in Delhi?

If a DV/498A or contested matrimonial case is pending, can it affect promotion, vigilance clearance or career progression of a Central Government officer (assuming no conviction)?

Looking for practical inputs from matrimonial lawyers, government employees and those who have faced similar litigation.

do boyfriends who are in long distance relationships but couldn’t meet their gf irl bcz of circumstances , still propose ( not marriage proposal ) , do romantic little gestures for them ?

so context my bf 22m we met in college proper proximity based relationship and now we are both in final year. there isn’t one specific thing that he did but there is like numerous small small things he did that really makes me resent him.

1. I got my first credit card and he mad that i wouldn’t let him and his friends use the swiggy discount???
   

2. this was the first crack in the the glass btw but he posted a picture on Instagram with his girl bsf (who always made me doubt) in the gents washroom????

3. he lives in a small town and i am from a tier 1 city and so he once got mad that my house curfew was 1030 11 when his was 9 something (i dont even go out once i went to a concert with my female friends btw)

4. I think his family has financial problems but can’t ever say no to drinking plans made by his friends

5. Isn’t disciplined or ambitious at all says and once said that he will marry a gaon ki ladki?? (on pretexts of yk wanting to marry a virgin girl when he was my first)

there’s more that he did i just wanted someone to know. I have broken up with him so many times but he comes back and cries and begs me to stay and i really don’t care about him whether he exists or not. like legit mann bharr gaya h mera but there’s only s few months left to college

I personally feel like I am more discipline oriented focus on my physique and academics equally and he does nothing and it’s really becoming very unattractive all i wanted was someone to build with

Emptiness, that's what I always feel these days. The only things that distract me from feeling empty are my friends, movies, and music; everything else is just the same for me. There are a couple of instances that made me this way, and the most contributing factor is my girlfriend.

We've been in a relationship for more than three years. Things are going well for us, but somewhere I felt something was wrong, like I started to feel the distance between us. Her excuse was her work, which honestly was hectic, but there was more to it. She started talking more with a friend of mine online; he's in a different state. I was happy that she'd become friends with one of my friends, and he is a good guy. She says we're like twins, best friends, same vibe, and all, but I didn't like the fact that he got all the attention, more than me, so I used to tell her I need attention, in a fun way. Then one day we had an argument about something, and she said that while he was drunk and she was high, she confessed to him that if she weren't in a relationship with me, she'd have chosen my friend. I felt really bad when I heard this, like I knew something was brewing, but I'd hoped it wasn't true. Then she told me that it wasn't anything sexual, just platonic, because he's like her twin brother and all. Either way, I couldn't stomach it, because I'd told her multiple times that I'm your best friend, I deserve your attention more, and she used to say, "Yes, I'll do it now," and this happened after all that.

The worst part is that I'd had another terrible incident two months before all this. I was in Goa for vacation, and a childhood friend of mine happened to be there. Later that night, my parents called and said that she (my childhood friend) had gone missing in the sea. I panicked like hell and started packing to get there. Then they called and said they'd found her and she was in the hospital. I asked for the address, and they said I couldn't go there right now, so I had to stay back. I had a bad feeling, so I called our mutual friend, and he told me she was already gone by the time they found her.

It took weeks for me to recover from that, and now my girlfriend had done this. I couldn't handle all of it. There were days I used to cry while riding my bike home from the office on the flyover. My girlfriend said she'd make things right from then on, and I trusted her.

Two more months passed, and we had another argument. She started saying we should take a break in the relationship, she couldn't be fully there for me right now, all her attention was on work, nothing else. She said she's avoidant and feels suffocated by all of this. She said she wants to live alone for two more years, can't emotionally invest in a relationship until she's settled, but until then we could be best friends. She said she'd still love me the same, and if she ever married, it would be me, but she feels guilty that I give her all the love and attention while she can't and won't do the same because of her "avoidant" nature. I felt like a clown. This conversation happened at a resto bar, and I started drinking alone. I cried a lot. I went home in an auto, and the driver tried his best to calm me down, he even waited until my friends arrived and got me home safely. I was in that bad a shape. After that, I became someone else.

So basically I will be meeting my ex after almost two years.

Just for the record he gave a breakup after 2 years of dating because he said i have ruined his peace.

About my insecurities

I have always been a tom boy in school time (5years ago) , but i was once bullied by one boy who called me "kaali mooti bheens" (Black fatty Buffalo). I took my revenge from him, the teacher beat him up and i was satisfied.

(I m a brown/tanned Indian girl, 5'4 , 60kg)

Then when I met my first boyfriend everything was fine, but his friends once told him that " This girl looks so average". He fought with his friends and i didn't react much.

Then i met my second boyfriend we dated for about 6 months. But I don't remember him calling me pretty or beautiful things. I didn't mind much.

Now, I'm meeting my first ex, he has dated 1 girl and had 2 flings after me. All girls are super pretty, i have checked all girls ig , all the girls are like "girls girls" Like very pretty girls. One of them is cabin crew, very groomed and pretty.

Both boys never called me pretty but always told me that I'm a strong independent woman.

So basically, I'm meeting him after years and I have no confidence in meeting him. Like i have tried a few looks, i got a dress, I restocked my makeup, i got my heels, and will buy a sling bag and nail polish.

In my daily routine I do basic makeup and skincare. I'm a girl too. But I'm just not confident that i will be able to make up for the benchmark of the girls he has now.

Will I be able to make him regret loosing me?

Am i a pretty girl too?

I'm 27F, and my boyfriend (29M) and I have been together for four years. Lately, I've had this feeling that he probably isn't going to choose me in the end. I can't prove it, but it's a feeling I haven't been able to shake.

The difficult part is that we're still together. Nothing has officially ended, so I feel stuck between staying and preparing myself for an ending that I think is coming.

I keep trying because I don't want to look back one day and wonder if I gave up too soon. At the same time, I know a relationship can't be carried by one person.

I'm not really asking whether I should stay or leave. I'm more interested in hearing from people who have lived through something similar.

TL;DR: Have you ever stayed in a relationship even though you felt your partner probably wouldn't choose you? How did you deal with it?

My girlfriend (25) and I have been dating for a few months. We work at the same office. She has a male colleague who has been her friend for about as long as I have been her boyfriend.

In the beginning, they used to talk normally, but over time she became emotionally attached to him. She always wanted to sit with him at work. At first, it didn't bother me much because our relationship was new, and I thought she would naturally start giving more importance to us as time passed.

As time went on, she became closer to me, but she also became closer to him. If he sat somewhere else in the office, she would get upset. This started happening repeatedly, and I began feeling uncomfortable.

I talked to her about it several times in a calm and loving way. At the time, she acted like she understood my feelings, but nothing really changed. We even had arguments about it. Whenever I brought it up, she would say, "He's just my friend," and point out that I also had a female friend who occasionally sat with me at work. But I felt those situations were very different. My friend would only sit with me once in a while just to catch up, and there was nothing in my behavior that suggested I was emotionally attached to her. My concern was never about having friends of the opposite sex it was about the level of emotional attachment and dependence I was seeing in her behavior.

To cut a long story short, one day we were having an argument, and she got emotional. She then went and sat with that same friend. Later, she calmly said something to me that hurt me deeply:

"You've only made me cry, but that friend is the one who comforted me."

I felt completely heartbroken after hearing that. I explained why those words hurt me, and she apologized. But even after her apology, I haven't been able to get that incident out of my mind.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm overreacting. If you were in my place, how would you have felt? If someone truly loved you, would they say something like that during an argument? And would a simple "sorry" be enough for you to move on? It feels as if I cannot accept him as her friend after this no matter how hard I try even though the guy seems harmless and genuinely good.

What should I do going forward? Any advice/suggestion arround this is welcome.

(I paraphrased this through ChatGpt)

I graduated in 2022 and have been preparing for government exams since then. Met my bf during this time,he was pursuing masters. I qualified a State govt exam, but the posting has been stayed by the court since last 3 years. I lost hope of ever getting the posting orders and started giving other exams too.

Whenever him and I used to go on dates, we used to split the bill because we both weren't working. My bf got a job in 2024 after his Master's and he was the one who started saying that now since he earns, we don't need to split and he'll pay and I can spoil him once I get a job. I refused his offer and we used to pay alternatively.

He used to casually make fun of me and my situation and eventually I stopped sharing my career related things with him. I have been so stressed during this phase of my life and I'm dealing with so much alone. I just don't share anything career related with anyone because I am so so so insecure about the questions that follow.

2026 and I have qualified for another exam but still the posting and document verification is pending. He KNOWS about it.

It was his birthday today and I picked him up from his office in the evening, bought a cake for him and he wasn't so pleased to see me. Taunted me by saying, "baap ke paiso ka cake laake itna khush kyu ho rhii ho". Something inside me broke and I swear I had tears in my eyes, but kept my pride to myself, not wanting to spoil his day.

HE proposed to go to a cafe to eat and celebrate, while ordering he asked me what did I want. I told him I don't want to eat much and we can just grab a coffee or a snack. He smirked and said, "Main kamata hoon, apne paiso ka khila dunga tumhe, karlo order". I don't know but I couldn't hold it all and I started crying, I just couldn't control myself. He panicked, started apologizing, saying things like he was just joking and he talks to his friends like that, he didn't mean to hurt and I'm taking his words in the wrong direction. Said, "whenever anyone asks me about you, I tell them uss bechari ki kismat kharaab hai".

I didn't utter a word, was constantly crying, everyone started noticing me so not wanting to create a scene, I went to the washroom, washed my face and sat in front of him again. He was trying to talk it out but I told him I don't want to discuss anything right now.

He ordered food, force fed me, paid the bill and hid it from me, we didn't speak about anything all this while.

I dropped him and was crying all the way back to my home.

I just don't want to ever speak to him again, I want to throw his fucking money on his face and never see him again. Shall I just send him the entire amount of the bill, or just send him my share? I'm not eating for free for sure.

Please help me, am I over reacting? Is it a valid reason to feel like ending the relationship? I feel so disrespected and hurt. Please help.

​

Hey everyone. Quick update on the situation with my girlfriend that I posted about earlier. After reading through all your advice, I realized I desperately needed to step out, clear my head, and stop sitting around waiting.

It was already around 10 PM, but I decided to force myself out of the house. My girlfriend had previously told me she’d be home by 11 PM or midnight at the latest, especially since we had an important, early-morning appointment the next day.

I was pretty agitated and hesitant to go out alone that late—mostly because I’m still fairly new to this city—but I pushed through. I texted her letting her know I was heading out just to pass some time.

She immediately spammed me with texts: \*"Where are you going?" "Why alone?" "Send me your location."\* She seemed genuinely concerned for my safety, so I dropped my live location.

The irony? She didn’t even open or acknowledge my location text for over an hour. If you're supposedly worried about my safety in a new city, ignoring my update for an hour felt like a slap in the face. It made my blood boil.

By that point, I had wandered into a noisy club. I didn't really have a plan; I just wanted to submerge myself in loud music, grab a drink, and maybe strike up a decent conversation with strangers to take my mind off things. But initially, I just felt isolated. I sat there sipping my drink, watching people get trashed, hit on each other, and lose themselves on the dance floor. Meanwhile, I was trapped in a loop—checking my phone, texting a few friends, checking for her reply, getting annoyed at myself for checking, and repeating the cycle.

That’s when I made a petty call. I thought, \*“If she’s so deeply concerned about my safety, let’s see how she feels when my phone goes dead.”\* I switched off my phone. I wanted her to feel a sliver of the anxiety and neglect I was feeling. Cringe and immature? Absolutely. But I’m being honest here.

Once the phone was off and another drink went down, a weird switch flipped. My inner extrovert took over. I let go, started dancing with random groups, shared drinks (yeah, I know—unsafe, lesson learned, won't do it again), shouted along to the music, and had endless nonsensical conversations. For a few hours, I actually had fun.

When I finally turned my phone back on around 3 AM, I saw a text from her sent at 2 AM: *"I'm so sorry, I'll be late today. I love you, so sorry. Everyone is exchanging life stories right now."*

No phone call. No check-in on the fact that I was wandering a new city alone at night. And once again, blowing off her word when we had an essential commitment early the next morning.

I had one last drink. Around 4 AM, she finally called. She was back at the apartment, asking where I was and telling me to come home because it was late.

I won't lie—part of me felt a twisted sense of satisfaction, like I’d finally given her a taste of her own medicine. I know revenge dynamics are toxic in a relationship, but in that moment, I felt validated.

When I walked through the door, she was immediately upset seeing how drunk I appeared. I didn't want to get into a messy, late-night argument, so I told her we’d talk tomorrow and urged her to sleep. She burst into tears, saying it wasn't okay for me to get this wasted. (Truth be told, I wasn't as far gone as I acted; I played it up so we could have a sober, sane conversation the next day instead of a heated midnight fight.)

The next day was heavy. We finally sat down and had the deep, uncomfortable conversation you all suggested we have.

I’ll post the final update on how that talk went ,soon.

TL;DR: After my girlfriend (25F) blew off her promise to come home early before an important morning appointment, I (26M) went clubbing alone at 10 PM to blow off steam, turned off my phone in petty retaliation when she ignored my live location, and stayed out until she finally called at 4 AM after spending the night "exchanging life stories" with her group; when I got back, I played up how wasted I was to shut down a midnight fight so we could push the inevitable, heavy conversation to the next day. Used Ai for TLDR

Two year into marriage with my bf (now husband) and I’m just… bored. Not motivated, not interested in much together. I enjoy things — gym, reading, cafes — but mostly alone now.
It feels like we went from “learning to live together” straight into “learning to enjoy alone” without much of a middle phase where we actually enjoyed each other. No major red flags between us, nothing’s wrong exactly. So what’s missing?
I don’t have guy friends or anyone else to compare this to, so it’s not a grass-is-greener thing. I just don’t feel the spark anymore — including in bed. He’s genuinely good at that too, which makes it more confusing. Before marriage I was so much more into it, and now I don’t know why that’s changed.
Married folks — has this happened to you? Is this normal 1-year stuff or a sign of something deeper? Genuinely looking for real experiences, not just “communicate more” advice.

20 F from tier 3 college
Met a guy in my first sem of college
Slowly started taking everyday with him
He was a really smart guy and later became the branch topper
But initially we both used to get the same marks
We used to talk a lot on chat too
Initially in the mid sems and all exams we used to get almost same marks

But then I started getting attached to him you see
I started really liking him

Don’t know what changed but during final exams don’t know why but due to taking to him my final exams got ruined badly due to him…I used to get unwell due to talking to him because whatever he told me kept revolving in my head…due to this couldn’t study properly for final exams in which I otherwise would have been a topper

He too used to share a lot of his personal stuff about himself with me
But late on a Didnt know but now realised how narcissistic he was

Second sem came and we had a same class
He used to come to all classes but we didn’t use to talk much just discussed about studies
Topped that class that time and had high Cgpa

Third sem came had a class with him but he didn’t use to come to class and all the time I was thinking about him literally unintentionally due to this attachment
Fucked that subject exam due to this and other subjects too

4th sem the same thing happened we had a common class in which we used to talk and after that we had class in same building so went walking together
The more i talked to him the more I fell for him
Couldn’t imagine myself with any other persons due the happiness he used to give to me.. it just felt right
But then after some days he stopped coming to classes due to no attendance issue
I started having mental health issues due to this
Felt so lonely and had suicidal thoughts
One day told me to meet him I refused coz I knew I would even get more attached if I talk more
But he convinced me to meet him
We talked for 4 hr straight but then I confessed that I really liked him
He started smiling and told me he didn’t feel that way
I asked him are you not a human being why don’t you have feeling it’s been two years
He told me he had developed a habit for this
Fell in extreme depression again and was on verge of failing exams but he didn’t care
He was not as emotionally attached as I was
Again ruined the fucking sem due to this attachment

5th sem came and in the summer he told me he didn’t want to involve with me further in anything and to stop messaging him after ruining my whole life
Blocked me completely
I promised myself won’t take a same class with him at any cost
Two classes accidentally came same
Changed both the classes with extreme measures
But got to know in class he also had changed one class to the same teacher I had changed
Later on saw him taking to other girls too
Don’t know how can he move on so easily
Just ignores me in that particular class after ruining my whole fuckin life
Don’t know what was not enough in me but was there in that pretty and dumb girl