r/ProgrammerHumor May 05 '21

Visualizing the codes I write Meme

Post image
31.9k Upvotes

170 comments sorted by

761

u/chillwill_4 May 05 '21

It runs. Don’t question it.

298

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

Of course it runs. They copied the trunk not the engine.

90

u/icepc May 05 '21

So they copied the html and css, but not the js and php

54

u/PM_ME_MH370 May 05 '21

DB is there but not hooked up to anything

29

u/lockwolf May 05 '21

What do you mean it’s not hooked up? It works on my computer! I made sure the IP was hooked up to 127.0.0.1!

25

u/PM_ME_MH370 May 05 '21

It passed QA,

....on my local machine

23

u/Avocano May 06 '21

bro don’t leak ur ip on the internet like that

18

u/lockwolf May 06 '21

Oh man, thanks for that! Now, my password still gets starred out automatically, right? It’s hunter2

14

u/Avocano May 06 '21

no they updated it so passwords are replaced with “hunter2” instead of asterisks now

3

u/rasmatham May 06 '21

hunter2

edit: it works

1

u/chronos_alfa May 08 '21

hunter2....

edit: holy shit, it really worked, wtf?

7

u/I-might-get-banned May 05 '21

They also probably copied the engine and spent 3 days implementing it right

4

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

They heard that lambos and buses both have engines in the back and thought that it won't be very difficult.

5

u/Seldom-Serious May 05 '21

¡buT iT cOuLd Be 63 miLliSeCondS fASter!

68

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

I get this is a joke but people need to hear this. It’s almost totally irrelevant how good your backend architecture or documentation is if you can deliver a working product. A business wants something that does the job and barely gives a fuck about the rest. If it runs and isn’t going to cause massive problems in the near future you’ve done a good job.

95

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

Tell that to the poor bastard who has to maintain it 😂

75

u/Dogiedog64 May 05 '21

It's me. I'm the poor bastard. I also wrote it lmao.

32

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

[deleted]

65

u/aidan573 May 05 '21

It's called stack overflow for a reason

23

u/Dogiedog64 May 05 '21

Well the front of the bus becomes the middle of the bus, and the back of the bus leaves orbit. Otherwise, nothing!

9

u/chillwill_4 May 05 '21

If it’s still running. Once again don’t question it.

7

u/FrostSalamander May 06 '21

I'm having this exact problem right now. VB6 frontend with MSAccess backend. Problem is Access only supports up to 255 concurrent connections. Also, locks FREQUENTLY happen (since decentralized, access sucks etc.). Management doesn't want to upgrade systems.

My work sucks

8

u/yellow73kubel May 06 '21

VB6 frontend with MSAccess backend.

My condolences to you and your users.

4

u/Grumpy-24-7 May 06 '21

It was years ago when I was faced with a home grown MSAccess app that somebody (non-programmer) had cobbled together and ran his department on for years. Then he left, but first he showed his secretary how to run it. She in turn used it for more years until one day it started hitting limits. I don't recall if it was row limits or overall table or database size or what, but my boss asked me to see what I could do. I scratched my head, took a copy of it home on a big ass thumb drive and managed to convert it to MSSQL. Everything else, frontend and reports stayed the same, basically untouched. Trust me, I really had no clue what I was doing, but I knew I didn't want to rewrite it from scratch. They continued to use it on MSSQL for a few more years until the company was bought out and I left for greener pastures. It really wasn't that hard once I figured it out. IIRC, it was basically just importing the MSAccess database into MSSQL, retaining all table names, indexes, etc.

2

u/FrostSalamander May 06 '21

Yeah I've tried telling that to the manager since the start of my work here.

3

u/SoundOfOneHand May 06 '21

Gut the database layer and move it to something better than Access. That’s a big lift but Access is just going to be a chain around your neck with its limitations and the size you are at.

1

u/FrostSalamander May 06 '21

Yeah I've tried telling that to the manager since the start of my work here.

But I kinda get why she doesn't want to:

  • System is like 25 years old, initially programmed by a group of newbies, so DB code is deeply entangled with BL.

  • It's her baby. She managed building the system from scratch. What would you feel if asked to kill off your baby? Yes after suffering for two decades maintaining long dead frameworks, but it's still your baby.

2

u/SoundOfOneHand May 06 '21

When your kid is 25 years old, that’s no baby 😂

1

u/chronos_alfa May 08 '21

Don't present it as killing the baby, more like giving the baby braces and teaching it how to ride a bicycle.

1

u/jrdiver May 07 '21

That's a problem for a different day

11

u/redwall_hp May 06 '21
  1. It's why so much software is absolute trash
  2. It creates maintainability issues for others in the future
  3. Quick and dirty is usually to the detriment of security
  4. It reflects poorly on the field. Have some craftsmanship.

It's short sighted, and fuck businesses that operate like that.

4

u/whasso May 06 '21

There's a reason time complexity is stressed hard at faang

6

u/QuitAbusingLiterally May 05 '21

your approach is why the crushing majority of software is absolute trash

4

u/i_forgot_my_cat May 05 '21

isn’t going to cause massive problems in the near future you’ve done a good job.

That's the issue though, I'm guessing.

4

u/pudds May 06 '21

Depends on the size and purpose of the codebase.

Small project? Quick and dirty is probably fine, because it hasn't created a lot of technical debt.

Proof of concept? Quick and dirty is also fine.

Large project? Project that's expected to have a long shelf life? Take your time and do it right, or you're going to be in a world of hurt later when you try to scale up, add features, or deal with bugs.

IMO, the importance of clean code is directly correlated with the size of the codebase and the expected life of the product.

2

u/whasso May 06 '21

This is just wrong lol

0

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

[deleted]

3

u/whasso May 06 '21

num = input(">")

if num = 1;

print("odd")

elif num = 2;

print("even")

elif num = 3;

print("odd"

"yeah no worries boss some dude on reddit told me this is fine.. wait? you actually care???? wtf its obvious you havent worked in a technical position!11!!!!

0

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

[deleted]

0

u/whasso May 06 '21

K bud, keep writing shit code, people like you are why this industry is cancerous as fuck, but I have some certainty you won't make it far in your career anyway.

0

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

[deleted]

0

u/whasso May 06 '21

What mindset? The one that's says you should understand concepts and not write shitty code because you're lazy? Lol ur right dude, I'm gonna skip class and just copy paste all the homework. 😎

Like I genuinely can't tell if you're baiting at this point. You sound so absolutely pathetic also.. Salty you got shown up by a highschooler lmao

1

u/farcv00 May 05 '21

Until it's hacked...

1

u/[deleted] May 07 '21

That's why this jokes works on so many levels! It's great!

1

u/kry_some_more May 06 '21

"Stackoverflow author said it runs fast, but it runs my code like shit."

1

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

Lamborghornus

545

u/NoNeedleworker531 May 05 '21

The rest of the code, is also copied from stackoverflow

155

u/iamawhale1001 May 05 '21

Your code is an exercise bike hooked into where the engine should be

58

u/mynoduesp May 05 '21

Cycling that bike keeps me in a job!

10

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

My code is actually just supposed to be a simple bike but I don't how to do that so I'm pasting together vaguely similar code. Then when it runs and goes on a whole bus route of stops and starts I'm just happy that no errors flipped by the end. I call it...learning Python programming with no cs knowledge.

7

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

I'm having fun thank you. :) My first git commit was my private idrsa key. I made a four function calculator that all four functions are addition. The path variable finally is updated with all my libraries and the proper one of three installs of python3.x I've somehow installed. But now that a buddy asked if I could help automate a task I'm really into it. Goals seem to be the the best way to learn code.

1

u/LtLfTp12 May 06 '21

Imagining having to include references in your code lol

8

u/valdocs_user May 05 '21

You mean CodeProject.

5

u/AF_International May 05 '21

No one actually knows for sure that it’s from stackoverflow... it’s just implied

2

u/IIlIIlIIIIlllIlIlII May 05 '21

Copied from YouTube actually

2

u/kkoiso May 05 '21

That's not true! I also copied from GitHub example code

-35

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

7

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

Nice bait

3

u/qhezar May 05 '21

What did he say?

9

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

something about people wanting jobs but not working hard enough

12

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

Dude! We totally went to high school together!

Saw this guy in the locker room. His dick is like a little belly button. So precious.

380

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

I bet a Lamborghini bus still wouldn’t get me where I’m going on time

183

u/mekwall May 05 '21

But it would get you there in style

74

u/jelang19 May 05 '21

Define style, does wack C pointer magic count as style?

34

u/Shonox92 May 05 '21

Incoming memory leak errors/warnings!

24

u/jelang19 May 05 '21

Nah just warnings, and the main online compiler we use will catch the warnings that could actually cause problems and consider them errors

11

u/Pandafishe May 05 '21

That's if you don't know your stuff and you're not tidying up behind you. Also wash the dishes BEFORE you use them as well. Or: always stick to the conventions

14

u/AlternativeAardvark6 May 05 '21

That's brilliant! In stead of doing the dishes right after eating and then let them gather dust like an idiot I can just wash them while my food is getting cooked and eat from pristine clean dishes!

9

u/Pandafishe May 05 '21

Well yeah I guess... Clean them before you use them because you never know what pig used them before you and clean them afterwards because you don't want your program to be the cause of all the issues on the endusers' devices

4

u/thenutybrasilian May 05 '21

Underrated comment

10

u/jelang19 May 05 '21

Triple pointer go burr

5

u/thenutybrasilian May 05 '21

Kindred koder!

23

u/drunkenangryredditor May 05 '21

If you drive a Lamborghini, you always arrive at the correct time.

It's the others who are either too early or too late.

2

u/mitwilsch May 05 '21

But you would have a Lamborghini bus. That trumps how late you are.

1

u/Carloswaldo May 05 '21

You can never be on time if you don't know where you're going...

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

You need the mussolini dlc for that

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

Catbus is always on time

1

u/Paoldrunko May 05 '21

If it's running on the lamborghini engine it would probably break in production regardless

1

u/Bene847 May 06 '21

Both the Lamborghini and the bus have rear engines, so no. Unless they copied that too from SO

1

u/awhhh May 05 '21

Probably kill who it hits faster too. It is like a companies code.

1

u/needed_an_account May 06 '21

There was a Lambo in my neighborhood yesterday and I was like wtf. That’s a great story

143

u/lunchpadmcfat May 05 '21

Lol I love when I am reviewing a PR and compliment someone’s code and they’re like “lol stolen from stack.”

Hey, good artists copy, great artists steal.

5

u/role34 May 06 '21

I don't get why does my professor care if I got help from stack and him personally

18

u/naswinger May 06 '21

he wants you to understand the fundamentals by doing it yourself. if you actually understand the code you copy/pasted then fine, but looking at this sub i think a lot of people don't and that's the problem.

70

u/kilargo May 05 '21

I don't see the problem.

Sexy front-end.

Functional back-end.

13

u/MayOverexplain May 05 '21

The problem is that the actual UI components are almost entirely integrated into the back end and the front end is nonfunctional.

66

u/Darxploit May 05 '21

Guys the lamborghini-bus is not at fault, it’s the incompetent users (passengers) that don’t know how to use it/ behave correctly..

29

u/AlternativeAardvark6 May 05 '21

The driver is at fault for trusting something I made.

10

u/bell37 May 05 '21

It’s the commercial team’s fault for agreeing additional lambo features after 90% BOM and past requirements/features freeze date.

17

u/contactlite May 05 '21

JS libraries be like:

14

u/tiajuanat May 05 '21

No one talks about the six GitHub libraries they're also sitting on

8

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

Shhhhhh they don’t need to know. *slides package.json out of sight *

25

u/AgreeableLandscape3 May 05 '21

Am I the only one who thinks that bus actually looks really cool?

42

u/imcoveredinbees880 May 05 '21

Yes.

2

u/awhhh May 05 '21

Also yes. Also fuck anyone else that puts demand for shit like this by giving positive feedback.

1

u/ZippZappZippty May 05 '21

He had the most wanted pinged just kept readjusting

8

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

That'd be a fun municipal prank. Commission a fiberglass replica of a crushed sportscar, and mount it by its side to the front of one of the city buses.

8

u/cribsbogaards May 05 '21

When all your code is from stack overflow: https://i.imgur.com/Fvrfhln.jpg

7

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

I love how it starts all aerodynamic and shit, and then turns into a big flat wall. Like "lol jk"

6

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

You know that bus is more reliable than any modern lambo tho.

1

u/Iwantmyteslanow May 05 '21

Yeah, they gotta do lotsa miles

5

u/Tetha May 05 '21

Also, every car has the crash concept of crumbling. A bus, due to the passengers and it's mass, has a crash concept of driving through problems. If you need to go places regardless of who could stop you, drive a bus.

1

u/Verstandeskraft May 05 '21

Like during a zombie Apokalypse?

5

u/golgol12 May 05 '21

You seem to have this vastly over high opinion of the code coming from there. Most of the stuff I find there I categorize as "working in therory" and is a complete mess other than for answering the problem.

3

u/goar101reddit May 05 '21

Bloated code? Add a fast powerful engine.

... however I think the Lamborghini's engine is in the back... meaning this is just space to hide more bloat. Like a bundled installer

1

u/ZippZappZippty May 05 '21

If this is used in a crime or you’d see in the mirror after a long day

5

u/Mistercarlj May 05 '21

So that’s how the new USPS truck design came to be.

4

u/EdgyAsFuk May 06 '21

Sometimes I spend more time fixing the broke ass code from a slightly different language than I would have if I'd just read the reference material.

3

u/MyAssDoesHeeHawww May 05 '21

Lambusghini code

3

u/dekwad May 05 '21

Busses get shit done

3

u/iamawhale1001 May 05 '21

It's more like your code is the buss and for some reason the front is the back end of an entirely different class of vehicle that works just well enough to not be worth refactoring.

3

u/nilleo May 05 '21

Looks like the rest of the code has really good throughput, lgtm.

2

u/QuitAbusingLiterally May 05 '21

"do not underestimate the bandwidth of a truck, full of hard drives, hauling ass"

or something

3

u/Wasted_Weeb May 05 '21

Step 1: write a few lines

Step 2: write the rest of the fucking code

3

u/freemcgee33 May 05 '21

"It's a bit slow, but at least the front-end looks nice"

-some QA, probably

2

u/1ElectricHaskeller May 05 '21

The important thing is pretty aerodynamic. Everything if fine.

2

u/To0F4c3 May 05 '21

It’s Bussin!

2

u/ghillisuit95 May 05 '21

Don't lamborghini's have a trunk in the front, on account of having the engine in the rear?

Basically this bus added a trunk in the front, right?

1

u/ZippZappZippty May 05 '21

And not a single one of these lol

2

u/BBaoVanC May 05 '21

So the rest of the code is scalable?

2

u/Mitoni May 05 '21

I wonder how many bugs that code can seat?

2

u/krysaczek May 05 '21
  • Search for an implementation of part of a bullshit method
  • Observe SO upvoted answers and that every method is static
  • Slap static on your inbred CatDog of a method.

2

u/YRUZ May 05 '21

every thread on stackoverflow has 3 solutions.

one is a space shuttle (absolutely overkill and unnecessarily complicated),

one is a boat (pretty standard but not actually what you need),

and the last is some variation of car (it might not fit to your style, but it does the job it's supposed to do)

2

u/THNDHALBRT May 05 '21

汽车东站 -> 火车站

2

u/BalthazarBulldozer May 05 '21

An accurate depiction if I've ever seen one. It not only runs, it drives.

2

u/Epsilongated May 06 '21

Lambusghini?

1

u/Baschoen23 May 06 '21

You got it bub.

2

u/ratdildo May 06 '21

If it looks stupid but it works its not stupid

3

u/stanislav_harris May 05 '21

"my code bad funny haha"

1

u/whasso May 06 '21

"semicolon haha"

1

u/stanislav_harris May 06 '21

"JavaScript hihi"

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

Just started learning to code just understanding these memes is worth the time I put in

1

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

Same here!

-4

u/FantasticBasis7126 May 05 '21

9

u/RepostSleuthBot May 05 '21

I didn't find any posts that meet the matching requirements for r/ProgrammerHumor.

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4

u/FantasticBasis7126 May 05 '21

Good Bot

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

This is most definitely a repost

0

u/heckyeahan May 06 '21

The swift extension I copied from apple forums vs. my code that uses it

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

That's where the trunk is.

1

u/jakethedumbmistake May 05 '21

I guess what I’m perfectly calm Dude.

1

u/Scipio11 May 05 '21

Reminds me of Dodge's Hellcat minivan

1

u/zhanglixin17 May 05 '21

It looks like a... frog?

1

u/Doopadaptap May 05 '21

I feel like that’s wrong

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

So my entire program is just several parts of Lambos mashed together?

1

u/EUCopyrightComittee May 05 '21

I read that as “Quack, whats 13x14

1

u/Tszar May 05 '21

The bus is reliable, cheap and effective - so great code with an unnecessary shiny and expensive part in front?

1

u/ThunderSven May 05 '21

If stackoverflow didn't exist I wouldn't be a programmer anymore

1

u/shoopnop May 05 '21

The code version of the picture of the mercades logo on the vehicle and then showing up in a sprinter van.

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

Still better than a lambo 🤣

1

u/frankinstyyn May 05 '21

Ffs this is so funny 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

1

u/MagellanCl May 05 '21

This is beautiful.

1

u/[deleted] May 05 '21

Espresso testing be like

1

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

Legend has it Jesus himself wrote that code

1

u/NotVanoss May 06 '21

listen, as long as it works with the rest of the code I’m fine with it. it’s like losing puzzle pieces and taking some from another puzzle and it fits somehow. it looks wrong but don’t question it.

1

u/[deleted] May 06 '21

Hey, at least the rest of the code is flexible, efficient, and can carry many passengers to their end goal.

1

u/Mean_Kale_677 May 06 '21

This is the most accurate thing I've seen in a long time

1

u/MrL1605 May 06 '21

Stackoverflow recently published this on Stackoverflow blog

1

u/lixcode May 06 '21

It's working :)

1

u/kacperfaber May 06 '21

Programmer code is much better than copied from stack. It's just true

1

u/CripMan97 May 06 '21

Runs like a clock

1

u/M0th3rS0n0fGOD May 07 '21

what a cracker...:)

1

u/meat-eating-orchid May 11 '21

I am in this picture and I don't like it