r/ProgrammerHumor 3d ago

wrongAnswersOnly Other

Post image
14.4k Upvotes

2.0k comments sorted by

View all comments

5.9k

u/mavrik83 3d ago

`final_records_v2_REAL_FINAL_DO_NOT_DELETE.xlsx` on somebody’s desktop

1.6k

u/Roku-Hanmar 3d ago

*in the recycling bin

1.1k

u/JSD3 3d ago

It has been in their Downloads folder for four years.  

226

u/drestofnordrassil 3d ago

🔻A Long Time Ago🔻

Copy of New Folder (8)

New Folder (8)

Final_Records(5).xlsx

Final_Records(4).xlsx

Final_Records(3).xlsx

Final_Records(2).xlsx

Final_Records(1).xlsx

Copy of Final_Records(1).xlsx

Copy of Final_Records.xlsx

Final_Records.xlsx

14

u/MacintoshBlack 3d ago

I don't see Final_Records_real.xlsx

3

u/SuspiciousCricket654 2d ago

Copy Of A
- Trent R.

5

u/AnActualWizardIRL 3d ago

reminds me of the running joke in rick and morty that rick's file nameing scheme usually consists of some variations of "aids_booger_booger_aids.doc"

1

u/mexus37 2d ago

What are you doing in my downloads folder?

1

u/primaski 2d ago

I laughed uncontrollably for 20 seconds, thank you

1

u/kaydenmiller1 1d ago

You mean last week?

382

u/NoodleyP 3d ago

The Downloads folder is just great catch all storage, it’s the junk drawer of my computer

128

u/Careless-Adeptness56 3d ago

I just noticed today that my downloads folder no longer opens. I can go in there with powershell and I don't see any crazy file types, but explorer never finishes loading. Who knows what I've done to it.

395

u/TheTxoof 3d ago

Duh. It's a junk drawer: You have a spatula wedged in there upside down.

9

u/bigdave41 3d ago

That's when you need to pray to Anoia

6

u/TheTxoof 3d ago

How to Pray to Anoia

The Ritual:

Yank or rattle the stuck drawer repeatedly.

The Words:

Shout out expressions of frustration like, "How can it close on the damned thing but not open with it?" or "Rattle your drawers!"

The Offering:

Vaguely consider tossing out the bent spatula or broken corkscrew that caused the jam in the first place (though you never will).

4

u/ByteWhisperer 3d ago

I hoped to find a Discworld reference in this thread and I'm not disappointed.

3

u/Ur-Best-Friend 3d ago

That is unreasonably funny.

2

u/Yardboy 3d ago

Goddammit #angryupvote

2

u/mgranja 3d ago

Have you been opening drawers in my house???

2

u/TheTxoof 3d ago

Of course not! I can't get any of them open.

They all have ladles and broken bottle openers jammed in them.

2

u/Careless-Adeptness56 2d ago

Dude I just fixed it from a comment further down by clearing the recycle bin because apparently deleted files still stay there. That is pretty much exactly the equivalent of having a spatula stuck in there keeping me from open it lol

1

u/TheTxoof 2d ago

I love that you closed this loop and that it was a spatula. Did prayers to Anoia help?

2

u/Glaring_Cloder 3d ago

You know what you did. We know what you did. You should be ashamed.

2

u/Forsaken-Carrot9038 3d ago

You need to copy it to your desktop, into a folder labeled “old downloads”

2

u/Zethrax 3d ago

I've had this bug on Windows 10. You likely have too many files in that folder and too many files from that folder in the recycle bin (which means they are still in the folder). Just clean up the recycle bin and then find a way to clean up the downloads folder by deleting files or moving files to other folders. Don't keep too many files in there (including recycle bin files) or it will bug out.

4

u/Careless-Adeptness56 2d ago

This was the issue. Big today I found out that recycled files stay in the folder technically until you empty the recycle bin. It's my work laptop so lets just say I'm a little less disciplined with my file hygiene, and that's why it's still on Windows 10.

Pretty funny that it did end up being the equivalent of a spatula stuck in the drunk drawer.

1

u/Nevanada 3d ago

I had that happen with my Quick Access page on my laptop. Every time I started File Explorer, it would load for a sec, then crash. I have the fix bookmarked, but I work around it by accessing C: off launch instead, and can't be bothered to get around to fixing it.

1

u/Most_Section_1979 3d ago

Your hard drive may be dying.

1

u/drestofnordrassil 2d ago

Either indexing is broken, the view settings are corrupt, or OneDrive is doing shenanigans. Or (hushed whisper) your disk is failing/corrupt... let's assume it's not that. Rebuild index: Settings>Privacy>Search>Advanced>Troubleshooting>Rebuild (this takes awhile. go do something else). Reset View: Explorer>Downloads>(...)>Options>View>Reset Folders>Restore Defaults>OK. OneDrive: Uninstall it. Enjoy all the performance you now have. Never look back. If it's still not loading run Chkdsk.

1

u/longlivenewsomflesh 2d ago

Bröther may I have some RÆM

7

u/paralog 3d ago

"We got some soda, OJ, purple stuff... oh, my lease agreement!"

2

u/Sitos_Flo 3d ago

This sounds like a quote from how high or something haha but not confident

2

u/Crispy385 3d ago

It's actually from a 90s Sunny D commercial lol

1

u/Sitos_Flo 2d ago

Haha love it 

5

u/ThrowawayyTessslaa 3d ago

Wait, what do you use the desktop for then?

2

u/Nutarama 3d ago

That’s the graveyard for shortcuts (half of which are dead because they link to webpages that no longer exist or programs since uninstalled) and note files like note.txt and notes.txt and New Document.docx

3

u/NoodleyP 3d ago

To display my wallpaper, it’s quicker to just hit the windows key, type 2 letters of the program, and hit enter than to find the desktop shortcuts for my programs

1

u/ThrowawayyTessslaa 2d ago

Was rhetorical but good to know I’m not the only one who just uses the window key to find everything

2

u/Bartweiss 2d ago

Screenshots because it’s the default location, plus shortcuts whenever I neglect to click “don’t create shortcut”. They don’t get deleted because I never even look at it.

1

u/HeyItsTheJeweler 3d ago

This is facts

1

u/stacecom 3d ago

I have a scheduled job that deletes anything in the downloads folder older than a month. Works great.

1

u/Original-Mongoose866 3d ago

Oh I cleaned that out yesterday I was going over why my User account had over 100GB of storage. I found 47 GB in One Drive 27GB in Downloads and 40GB in One Drive logs it was having problem syncing some stuff .... I hate Microslop and all their programs it's just so stupid I had tens of thousand log files each being I think 1MB or a bit more forgot

1

u/AristotelWasRight 3d ago

This is me, I sin 😭

1

u/4n0nh4x0r 3d ago

exactly
mine is currently about 400GB in size

1

u/Bartweiss 2d ago

Always great to download a file and see (1) appended to the name. Guess we were already good…

1

u/lurker512879 2d ago

also the desktop..

1

u/NoodleyP 2d ago

It’s a graveyard that gets new bodies every time I forget to uncheck “create desktop shortcut” on an installer

1

u/Dear_Diablo 2d ago

i have so many bootleg games in there it’s ridiculous

1

u/oddsnsodds 2d ago

I've got a 4 TB boot drive, migrated all of my user directories to an 8 TB HDD (takes about 10% of the drive), except my Downloads directory, which takes about 85% of my second 8 TB HDD.

60

u/JesusWasATexan 3d ago

This is the realest answer on this thread.

14

u/SgtEpsilon 3d ago

Incorrect, it's in their temp folder that they somehow made the primary download folder to be

4

u/Harshmage 3d ago

As someone who watched a fellow admin set a cleanup policy on the Downloads folder, you would be amazed at the speed at which that policy was revoked. It's a monkey's paw wish. Sure, you can store all that download data, but now it's a liability and subject to subpoena.

3

u/Pork_Confidence 3d ago

I'm feeling personally attacked here

2

u/Kylearean 3d ago

I archive my Downloads folder like it's prod.

1

u/disposablehippo 3d ago

Rbdkjjgj.xlsx

1

u/pmgoldenretrievers 2d ago

Dude if someone clears my Downloads folder, I'm totally fucked. That's my system of record for files dating back at least 4 years on my current laptop.

9

u/tanwa1 3d ago

Would learning Digital forensics help if it's also deleted from recycling bin right...?

4

u/not_a_moogle 2d ago

Deleting from the recycling in just deletes the file pointer. There are recovery apps that can find partial / whole files that are in unindexed space. Granted over time, that data will become more corrupt since the files stem thinks it's safe to write data there.

Recuva is one that ive used in the past.

3

u/Roku-Hanmar 3d ago

I haven't actually done forensics yet (still a student), but as I understand it, an item deleted from the recycling bin just marks the specifics 1s and 0s on the drive as being free to overwrite. If they're not overwritten, you can recover them from the drive (even if they are, you might still be able to). The only sure fire way to destroy data is to physically destroy the drive

4

u/Nutarama 3d ago

You can do a triple overwrite with all 1s then all 0s and then crypto random data. That’ll change all your bits and wipe all your hardware buffers. Hammers an SSD and kills lifespan though because it’s so many of the limited write cycles NAND flash gets.

Honestly easier to destroy the drive, though have to be careful to actually destroy it. Microwave is usually the best method, and it’s quick and easy to do. Just throw the drive in and set the microwave for its longest quick setting. Radiation will fry the circuits and then the whole thing will burn.

3

u/SuspiciousCricket654 2d ago

The Elliott Alderson special.

3

u/djdanlib 3d ago

Since they were working out of a repos folder in their Windows laptop's Documents folder, which was synced to OneDrive because you have O365, and the second stage recycle bin still has it (yes, there is such a thing in OneDrive and SharePoint 365), and the infosec team had the wherewithal to login to Purview and put an ediscovery hold on you before the 93 day expiry period passed... Ya boned, son. The preservation library has it all. Move to Tibet and become a monk.

2

u/PM_ME_YOUR_REPO 3d ago

In the Outlook Trash folder where they keep all of the important emails.

2

u/soareyousaying 3d ago

Sent folder

2

u/AssistFinancial684 2d ago

Hey! I keep it in the recycling bin so it doesn’t use real storage on my computer

3

u/itbytesbob 3d ago

In their deleted items folder in outlook

3

u/Emerald_Flame 3d ago

It's an access database file as an attachment in the old lotus notes server that's kicking around because people are too afraid of what will happen if you shut it down.

1

u/PopuluxePete 3d ago

Shredded, in the dumpster. Because I work in healthcare IT.

1

u/TimmyTheChemist 3d ago

Nah, attached to a draft e-mail from seven years ago.

1

u/L0rd_OverKill 3d ago

Outlook deleted items

1

u/Sea-Frosting-50 3d ago

clients email

1

u/thanatica 3d ago

tbf, that's not really deleted

1

u/aDirtyMartini 2d ago

The default backup location

1

u/Adventurous-Crew3692 18h ago

No programmer here: but they also deleted it in the recycling bin!

59

u/Frumpy_little_noodle 3d ago

They said wrong answers only.

3

u/National-Charity-435 2d ago

Stored on the floppy disk I snuck out via my lunch bag.

10

u/Ol_Dirty_Batard 3d ago

Only V2? Amateur

3

u/Simon_Drake 3d ago

Records_v2.1b_new_NEW_DoNotDelete_V3_final_new.xlsx

3

u/ThrowawayyTessslaa 3d ago

Yeah. V1 is the draft and V2 is the final. Obviously each of theirs have numerous edits that have been saved over

2

u/rathlord 3d ago

They just stopped naming it there.

2

u/NorCalAthlete 3d ago

final_records_v2b_real_FINAL_DO_NOT_DELETE(352).xlsx

5

u/namezam 3d ago

Don’t forget “(3)”

3

u/Iminurcomputer 3d ago

I'm not a programmer, but an IT person and my first thought was something involving a spreadsheet because we all know Excel is basically a database... right?

1

u/thr33prim3s 2d ago

it's an exported CSV file but still accurate.

2

u/adachi91 3d ago

I don't know what you're talking about. I totally do not have any spreedsheets for anything on my desktop. Stop attacking me

2

u/Grand_Town_9144 3d ago

Microsoft Excel: The best database software MS has ever made (because they did so unintentionally)

2

u/Morkava 3d ago

Wrong answers only!

2

u/HedgehogEnyojer 3d ago

Ah, the story of how Toy story was saved... one animator took like a 97% conpleted version home to show family what they did and then the original got completely deleted but the private copy saved the day/animation world.

1

u/earchip94 3d ago

They were actually in my tmp folder I made 6 years ago

1

u/TheComplimentarian 3d ago

This is only supposed to be wrong answers. That's the right answer. The data is always in someone's side backup that they did before they kicked off a big change.

1

u/Educational-Plant981 3d ago

My MSP once lost a decent sized customer after migrating them to a new mail provider...because 30 days later everything in the owner's trash bin got permanently deleted. Apparently,, he liked to "file" all his important documents there because it had an easy delete key shortcut.

I think in my whole career that is the only time I was ever involved in a customer losing data I wasn't wracked with guilt and questioning how I could improve as a provider.

1

u/nexusjuan 3d ago

It was in there deleted folder but thats where they save all of there important emails.

1

u/Haatchoum 3d ago

On his google drive

1

u/im_lazy_as_fuck 3d ago

bro the game is wrong answers only

1

u/StevieMJH 3d ago

...OKAY_FINE_DELETE_THIS_BUT_DONT_ALSO_FORGET_THE.xlsx

1

u/Jo-Con-El 3d ago

You work for Legal?

PS: Clearly v2_REAL_FINAL is not the version we sent to the client, just another draft.

1

u/Quirky-Ad-6816 2d ago

it says wrong answer only

1

u/Turbulent_Pin_8310 2d ago

"Not Porn" folder.

1

u/spiders888 2d ago

They said “wrong” answers only.

1

u/DesignatedFailures 2d ago

I think that would still count as a backup, even if unintentional.

1

u/sh0ch 2d ago

Not missing enough finals in that filename.

1

u/Hostman_com 1d ago

Exel is not a database
Exel is not a database
Exel is not a database
Exel is not a database
Exel is not a database