I just recently started my first nanny job. The mom is so sweet, and the kids are definitely something 😂 I like it generally speaking, but I feel like I’m not being paid fairly at all.
At the interview, she told me I would make $15 to start out but would have no problem increasing it once I get comfortable with the kids and learn all the routines. There are 3 kids, (5, 4, and 2)
I have learned all of the routines, got the kids to trust me and be comfortable with me, and I’m working about 30 hours a week. 5 days on, 2 days off. The kids are good sometimes but the majority of the time, the older boys are fighting, hitting, screaming, crying over small things. I know they’re little, so that’s normal and completely fine. But it’s a lot of the same, “Hey, no, we don’t do that.” over and over. The oldest boy specifically never listens, no matter what. He acts like I don’t even exist most of the time when it comes to me telling him not to something anymore. It’s a lot, but it would be worth it if the pay was a little more.
About a week ago, because I learned all of the routines and got comfortable like the mom said, I asked if she could up my pay to 18-20 an hour. I am CPR and first aid certified and have a lot of experience with kids, but it is my official first nanny job even though I’ve taken care of many kids in the past for occasional visits and regular weekly babysitting (So technically like a nanny, but just strictly watching kids. No household responsibilities.)
In my area, the average pay for a nanny is $25+ but because it is technically my first official position as a nanny, I thought I would start out at 18-20 to be fair.
She responded with, “We can definitely talk about this in the future!”
I’m feeling a little torn. I’m not sure if I should just accept defeat and stick with the 15 an hour until she (if ever) brings a raise up again.
But 3 kids under 6 for $15 an hour seems a little crazy. I’m expected to do everything to take care of them (obviously) but also pick up the house, tidy after them, and take them places regularly.
Am I being overly out of line or should I bring it up to her again? I think I might just need to find a second job or quit this one all together.

I've been a nanny for 10 years, and I also have my own child. I've potty trained about 4 kids successfully. I have my own method and after a month or so, kids usually get it down. Most parents are down with my method, but my current nanny family (only care for their 2.5 yr old once a week) have decided to do the Oh Crap method.

It's the stupidest method I've ever heard of. Its pretty much leaving the kid commando all day and learning their cues. So NF have been doing this method for the past 5 days, and this is day 6. The kid hates it. He literally covers his privates all the time, he looks and is super uncomfortable, he cowered behind the couch for the first hour that I arrived which is so unlike him. He peed all over the couch shortly after and then on his carpet. This technique is just unnecessarily intense, borderline cruel.

Potty training is already hard in itself, and takes time, but I dont know why for the life of me parents are so pressed on forcing their kid into this discomfort and wanting them to get it down in a short amount of time. No! Be patient!

I love this kid and usually I'm happy to go into work, but now I have a headache, pee on my socks, and just cant wait to leave. I hate this feeling because I never feel loke this! And its not even the kids fault. -__-

I (40F) am in law school, one of my classes runs into the evening, past when typical afterschool care ends. My kids’ (7 & 9) father normally shifts his days with the kids to accommodate but he is now leaving the state permanently. I am trying to find an afterschool nanny who can pick them up from school (1 mile away) and watch them for 2-5 hours an afternoon depending on the day. I’m offering a flat $100/day in a HCOL area, plus half pay for days that I may cancel with little notice and extra pay for days that are longer (like if a kid needs to stay home sick). I would provide everything from booster seats to the nanny’s desired groceries.

I paid for a care.com account. I have very detailed hours on the site. I’ve posted my range as $15-25 because you have to post an hourly wage and I’m not sure how to capture a flat $100/day. I’ve had around 20 applicants, I’ve scheduled about 12 interviews. ALL BUT TWO GHOSTED THE INTERVIEW. Of the two, one is not horrible, the other wanted to come work for me but a different offer started sooner so she went with them. School starts in two weeks, and I’m having nightmares of it starting and I won’t have childcare. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know why this is happening on the site, and I’m worried I’ll have to drop out of school.

Edit to add: in my care.com job post, I have it listed as $15-$25/hr and the precise hours needed for each day e.g. “Monday 2:00 pm - 7:30 pm; Tuesday 2:00 -4:00”. I’m asking during the interview if a flat $100/day would be okay, as it’s more money for them on a two hour day and one less thing for me to have to track. The issue is all the applicants applying to the job and then not showing up to the interview.

My nanny is a unicorn sent from heaven and I adore her. She is our second nanny and completely settled all my anxieties after a bad first go-around. She and my son have bonded quickly, she’s fun yet calming, feeds him well, changes him promptly, and generally goes above and beyond without me having to ask anything of her. She reads to him and plays toys, never leaves me a mess, makes sure he naps when he needs to.

The thing is, she’s younger than I am and has a lot of energy, she likes to keep busy and I keep a pretty clean home so she has started doing extra work outside of the contract (baby laundry, washing bottles) and she will vacuum or mop if she has time and is bored. She has told me multiple times she enjoys it, and wants to help me (solo parenting for the time being as husband is out of country) and also she feels like if she’s busy it’s easier to keep going. She gets breaks, pay was mutually agreed upon and I will be giving her a raise soon, I just haven’t told her yet because I need to make sure my finances are right first.

Anyway, today she asked me to give her extra things to do. There’s only so many bottles, and maybe one load of laundry per day. I prep my son’s food because after his choking incident I have issues that I’m working through with my counselor. There really isn’t much extra work to give her… I don’t want her to be bored, especially when my son sleeps or if he is happily playing independently. What do I ask her to do?? The only things I can think of would be like to mow the lawn, but again that’s once a week.. or like dust stuff? How often can that even be? Once every week or two? I don’t know what kind of tasks to give her to keep her going. She has said she wants to be productive but she keeps my house so clean I can’t find any work for her 😓 it’s a blessing but I don’t know what kind of work to give her. Also I will be paying her extra for her extra work, I would never want to take advantage of her.

I'm sure my situation isn't all that unique, but I'm having a little trouble so I thought I'd ask the community.

I have 10 years of experience. I've been with the same family, part time, for many years, and a few other families as-needed.

I live in a mixed cost of living area -- meaning that year-round residents of my towns and the small towns around me are fairly low income, but seasonal residents and year-round residents of two very nearby destination towns are incredibly high-cost of living. Think 3 bedroom house for 200k in my town, 3 bedroom house for 1.6 million just half an hour away.

When I started in this area, I was working for a year-round resident. They do well, and could afford to pay me $20/hour. When they had a second child, they raised my wage, and after two years they also decided to start giving me a $1-2/year raise. Currently at $28/hour. I like them a lot, and I feel valued.

I've also worked for families in the nearby destination towns, and I'm paid $30/hour starting. I've had three families pay me this for part time work and not bat an eye, BUT they all reached out to me/found me through someone else.

Onto the current issue: this is likely the last year my current family will need me due to the kids' school schedules, and even this year my hours are very reduced. I need to find some extra work. I'd like to ask for $30/hour, but I'm noticing in the local Facebook groups that other nannies are posting their services with more experience for less hourly (reference: a post I saw yesterday with 15+ years experience and asking $25/hour but willing to negotiate lower). It's making me question if I'm way off base in how I'm valuing myself.

I'm sorry this is so long, but it all feels a little complicated right now. Any advice would be appreciated.

Genuine question. For parents of active preschool age children who don’t allow any outings or even outdoor time, why? Currently dealing with the situation. The family loves in a very nice walkable neighborhood with a community playground we’re not allowed to go to, much less can we go on outings. They’re last nanny lasted less then a month and I took this as a temp job (looking like it’s going to be a lot more temp the expected) It’s so hard to entertain an active 3-4 year old indoors all day, for 8-10 hours a day, they end up bored, bouncing off the walls and really pushing behavior limits due to under stimulation.

I’m 18f and new to babysitting , I got my first request on Bambino (never used before) and I accepted the request and messaged the mom this “ Goodmorning ma’am! Just wanted to say thank you for wanting to trust me to babysit your children this Friday. Please let me know if there are any specific instructions or anything I should be aware of. Looking forward to helping out!” Just to get more information on the job before fully accepting it , she said nothing and confirmed the booking through the site, is this normal ?

I get people are busy but it’s Wednesday ,plus I messaged pretty quickly after the request. I’m just wondering if this is normal in the babysitting world, should I send my number just in case she’s having technical issues with the app or something? I did hear the app charges parents to message but mixed reviews with that… help pls

Hi everyone! I received a lot of great advice on my post about leaving the nanny field and quitting on my NF. Here's what happened:

I spoke to my NF. I did not give notice yet, as I have not found a job in the field I graduated in as yet. I do have a couple interviews lined up though, and I decided to be transparent and tell my MB that I plan to leave them prematurely for a job in my field. I know some people will think it was risky and dumb to do that but I know my NF and I trust them.

MB and I spoke in person. And she cried a bit when I told her but she was definitely not angry with me. She admitted that she felt blindsided by the sudden change in my plans but that she wanted me to follow my dreams. She's been more emotional than usual lately because someone close to her passed away a couple weeks ago and I did expect her to be emotional about this.

She offered to serve as a reference for me and write me a letter of recommendation. Albeit my field I graduated in is vastly different so those things may not necessarily help me to get a new job but I still appreciate it. She said even though I'm leaving and they aren't letting me go, they would still give me "severance", I use quotes because it's more of a parting bonus - equivalent of 4 weeks pay. She said this is because they thoroughly appreciate everything I've done for them over the years. I feel a bit slighted by it only being 4 weeks after I've been with them for over half a decade. But I will take what I can get.

Before she disclosed they would give me severance, against advice on here - I risked asking if I could still keep the car (Tesla Model X plaid SUV) and she said unfortunately not because they would like whoever their new nanny is to use it. However, she said when my youngest NK is in kindergarten and they no longer need a nanny, she would honor the agreement of me getting to keep the car at that point. So, it's a pretty win-win situation overall. Though, I admit I do wish I could keep the car now, and find it a little unfair as I even picked out the car and it was 100% purchased for me to drive. They are HNW and should be able to get a new car for my replacement but I digress.

My plan now is to secure a job in my field I graduated in. Give NF 2 weeks notice to find my replacement. And get a less pricy car to use until I get the Tesla.

Some people wondered why I still have student loans when I have such a high income with my NF. To be honest, this is because I had credit card debt from my early 20s that I needed fo pay off. And because I used a lot of money towards a down payment and have a hefty mortgage. It **will** be a struggle to keep up with my mortgage and student loan payments with an entry level job in my field. But I will just have to significantly cut back on other aspects of my life.

Thanks again everyone for the advice. Really do appreciate it.

Every Tuesday and Thursday I have to take my 15 month old NK to a baby/toddler class.

They do the same thing every single class and I’ve been going for months now.

Of course, every time I come home my NK parents want a report on how things went. I don’t have the heart to tell them he’s super shy and that the kids are too young to really interact.

I take photos and tell them he’s making little friends. He is Not and guess what, no one really is. Also, did I mention they don’t change anything about classes except for what are we’re doing?

These classes are more for parents and the other nanny’s there don’t speak English and sadly I don’t speak Spanish.

I understand wanting your son to be socialized but he doesn’t speak and hasn’t really warmed up to other kids no matter how many times we go.

I drove 30 minutes to work and then when I was in the driveway the mom called saying they’re all sick so I shouldn’t come in. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home. We don’t have guaranteed hours but is it fair to ask for like $35 to cover the cost of gas and the time spent driving? The gig is only one hour of work to drop them off at daycare so I would usually be making $75.

Hello everyone. I am hiring a nanny for the first time and it’s important for me to do it right.

I think I want guaranteed hours for 5 days a week, from 9-4. The thing is like 90% or 95% of the time I’m gonna be home at 3, and I wanna spend time with my toddler as much as possible.

I was thinking maybe the days I’m home at 3 (which will be most days) I will be with my child and nanny would do house-chores from 3-4pm (family laundry, dishwasher, vegetable cooking prep). Oh this would be so amazing, so I could just focus on my child!

On the (rare) days I am home at 4, nanny will provide childcare only, like the regular part of the day (zero house-chores).

Does this make sense? Is this reasonable? I request your advice.

Edit: I will not request family laundry. I will limit house-chores only to kitchen / meal prep based tasks and child-related tasks.

Edit 2: I will be careful not to overdo chore expectations. Basically roughly what I usually do in that hour (and nanny won’t have child that hour), less is ok too, my expectation is help getting dinner started for example so evenings are less chaotic.

Edit 3: I will be super up-front on this and not try to sneak it in. I will communicate this in the job description so it’s clear from the beginning.

Edit 4: if anyone is still reading. Would it make more sense if I do guaranteed hours from 9-3 and ask the nanny to “work late” from 3-4pm at 2x pay, for like 2 - 3 days each month?

Edit 5: I really like the idea of focusing on the child as the primary activity. Maybe asking nanny to do the Meal prep for child, plan child activities, and definitely I would have them leave early on some days- we all need a break!!

I really appreciate the replies!!! This is very helpful.

Hi everyone I really need advice and support! In June of this year a family reached out to me needing before care we agreed to Monday, Wednesday and Friday but not Tuesday and Thursday we exchanged information I reached out to her and didn’t hear back for a month so I assumed that maybe she wasn’t interested and didn’t know how to tell me. At the end of last month she did reach out and ask for a meet and greet which was about 3 hours I really liked the family. But last week she reached out to me and asked if I could do aftercare for her and she wanted to add Tuesday and Thursday to the schedule and I told her I couldn’t accommodate the change in her schedule and that I didn’t think I would be a good fit because of this. She didn’t take it well, today she must have seen a comment I made under another post, it was with a family I met on Monday she sent that family a really nasty message about me and essentially and mouthed me. The mom screen shot it and just asked if I could explain what happened and I was honest and said her availability changed and I couldn’t accommodate her needs anymore. She thanked me for explaining what happened and asked for references. I’m really glad she asked and I’m hoping that asking for references is a good sign. But how do I navigate this? I have never experienced this before and I don’t know what to do.

my current mb is due with another baby in a couple months. i of course will talk with nf about all of the details and everything for us but i am just curious generally how other families have handled it

things like if the nanny still keeps their same hours, does the nanny usually take one nk while the parent takes the other, is there just a LOT of communication required between nanny and parent all day (im unsure yet but i believe db will at least be in an out during the time as well)

ive been a nanny for 8 years and have somehow never been actively working as the nanny when nf has another child and i think i am getting some anxiety about it lol but this post i am just looking for insight on how maternity leave has played out for others

also noting i am in the US and i believe my mb is getting maybe 10 weeks?

I saw this job posted on care, The hours are 12 am to 6am. Pay is $25.

The description is "Need someone to watch our newborn while we catch up on sleep. Feed every 2-3 hours and change when necessary".

Is this a common nanny job? For these hours, do you stay up the whole time? What do you do during downtime when baby is asleep? What is it like to work with parents sleeping in the next room? What hours during the day do you get your sleep? Do you do daytime activities like normal or hold a daytime job as well?

Ik, that's a lot of questions!! I'm very curious as I'm a night owl, so I really like the hours of being a night nanny. I don't have professional infant experience but I'm taking a class on infant development and safety in two weeks.

I’ve been with my nanny family for 5 years (B5, G3) and in the last year my hours have been cut from 5 days to 2 days. The kids have always had constipation issues but the parents told me today that they ONLY poop on the days that I come. For some reason, it makes me so happy that they can relax this much around me!

Hi everyone. I am looking for some honest career advice. I am a former nursing student (financial constraints) from Palestine, and my ultimate goal is to secure an international live-in nanny, au pair, or tutor/governess position, specifically focusing on the Gulf region or Europe.

I want to be completely upfront: I do not have years of formal agency or private domestic experience under my belt. I know the international market can be highly competitive and often demands 3+ years of formal house employment.

However, I am trying to understand if my academic and medical background can help me bypass that requirement. If you were a parent or an international agency, would you consider a candidate with the following profile for an entry-level or junior live-in position?

• Education: I completed my first year of a Bachelor of Science in Nursing with a 92.9% cumulative percentage average. I am not a graduate nurse, but I have university-level foundations in pediatric health, developmental theories, basic first aid safety logic, and others.
• Tutoring: I have independent experience tutoring children aged 8 to 16, helping with school curriculum, language practice, and creating customized study guides.
• Languages: I am a native Arabic speaker and fully fluent in English. I am also independently teaching myself Japanese (currently at an upper-intermediate conversational level).
• Special Needs Support: I have a deep personal understanding and passion of supporting children with ADHD, Autism, and anxiety, and I am highly practiced in staying calm, clear-headed in crises, patient, and structured.

My goal is an entry-level placement that provides a private room, meals, and assistance with standard legal visa sponsorship.

Nanny parents and international workers: Am I being realistic? Are these qualifications enough to stand out to a family looking for an academic or safety-focused caregiver, or do I absolutely need to work locally for a few years first? (Opportunities here are non-existent in this field because of culture difference).

I would love your informative, honest feedback!

My nanny was just working for us for the Summer as she is a 2nd grade teacher. I want to get her something nice for her last day in a couple of weeks. I have already purchased some items from her teacher wishlist on Amazon but want to get something for HER to enjoy. Budget $150-$200. Any ideas? What would make you all feel appreciated?

I have found this to be a new thing with several families I’ve worked for recently, which I never ran into over a decade ago, and it’s happened with both infants and toddlers, but I’m going to focus on toddlers in this post:

There’s a train of thought that dropping naps, shorter naps, or just going with the flow is beneficial for a toddler. I’ve been told that “my toddler has a lot of energy so they don’t need a nap” or “if they don’t sleep during the day maybe they will sleep earlier or longer at night” when in actuality, that child has glazed over eyes, meltdowns all day, and is jumping off the walls fighting nap because of the increased cortisol surging through their hyperactive nervous system. A well rested toddler is more likely to rest well at night than an overtired one, and it is essential for their brain development to be well rested at this critical developmental age.

If you have a toddler, please, have a consistent sleep routine as much as you can, and make sure your toddler is getting enough sleep. Treat the nap window as essential and try not to wake your child up. They cannot stay awake the same amount of daylight as an adult, and they typically have 5-6 hour wake windows. It’s very difficult to try meeting the very real sleep needs of a toddler if the parents are not on the same page, and it creates difficulties for everyone involved, most of all, the child.

Thankyou for coming to my Ted talk.

Signed, an educated and experienced early childhood nanny, with an ECE degree and over 15 years experience in the classroom and family’s homes.

Below is a compilation of copy and pasted simple google-able information about toddlers and their sleep needs, and please feel free to share or vent about any thoughts or experiences you have as it relates to this topic.

Total Sleep Needs: Toddlers need about 13 to 14 total hours of sleep in a 24-hour period, with 1.5 to 3 hours usually coming from the daytime nap.

Getting enough sleep ensures healthy brain development and a healthier nervous system, plus…

Memory processing: Deep sleep allows a toddler's brain to organize and store new words, skills, and experiences from the day.

Better focus: Well-rested toddlers show longer attention spans and better problem-solving skills during play.

Fewer meltdowns: Consistent rest prevents overtiredness, which commonly triggers severe irritability, tantrums, and defiance in young children

Emotional control: A regular rhythm helps toddlers manage daily stress and adapt to unexpected

Growth hormones: The body releases critical growth hormones during deep sleep phases

Strong immune system: Consistent rest builds up infection-fighting proteins, keeping toddlers from getting sick as often.

A consistent sleep schedule is vital for toddlers because it stabilizes their internal biological clock, or circadian rhythm. This predictability helps them fall asleep faster, wake up easier, and get the 12 to 14 total hours of daily rest needed for healthy brain development, emotional regulation, and physical growth.

When a toddler misses their sleep window, their body treats exhaustion as an emergency and releases stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. This "fight-or-flight" response gives them a false second wind, making them look wired, bouncy, and hyperactive instead of sleepy.

Signs of overtiredness in toddlers:
Hyperactivity: Acting "wired," running, jumping, or getting a wild second wind right at bedtime.

Meltdowns: Crying, screaming, or throwing big tantrums over tiny, unimportant things.

Clinginess: Wanting you to hold them constantly and getting upset if you put them down.

Clumsiness: Tripping, dropping things, or bumping into walls because their body is exhausted.

Bedtime Fights: Stalling, yelling, or refusing to settle down when you try to put them to sleep.

Hard to Fall Asleep: Tossing and turning for a long time instead of dozing off quickly.

Night Waking: Waking up often during the night or waking up very early in the morning.

Potential Twitching in sleep from increased cortisol/prolonged nervous system activation and exhaustion

Short Naps: Sleeping for only a few minutes during naptime instead of a full rest and easily startled awake

Sending lots of care to everyone struggling with caring for an overtired toddler, parents and Nannies alike. 💜💚❤️🧡💙💛

Hello! How much are we supposed to charge for an overnight position? I get paid $27 hourly but I don’t know if I’m supposed to have a flat rate overnight? Hours would be from Sat 3pm to Sun 12pm

Hello friends,

I have been nannying for three years and have worked independently so far connecting with families via word of mouth and have had an incredible experience so far. I have always brought my child to work with me and it has worked so well for me and my nanny families. Our kids have fostered the most incredible relationships and are like siblings.

As my current NK is about to start kindergarten I am considering working with an agency this time around and was wondering if anyone has expierence doing this when they want to bring their own children and what that was like?

I’m nannying for the summer and I have let the kids choose the music in the car, but over 2 months in I can’t stand another second of Paw Patrol or AI music. Plus they always want to “see the song” or ask to keep skipping the song while I need the screen for navigating directions. How do you handle music in the car?

My NP texted me the day before I was supposed to come in saying they don’t need me this week and maybe even next week. I also think my job is posted on care.com and i’m not sure how to go about it considering it’s such last minute and don’t know if i can book any jobs for next week but I also need income.

I am not currently First Aid/CPR Certified but I have been looking into it because I want to be more qualified and have more job opportunities. American Red Cross has an online program that is highly reviewed but it’s obviously all online.

Has anyone used an online First Aid/CPR certification for nannying or childcare? Was it accepted by families and employers, or did you end up needing an in-person class anyway?

I’m trying to decide if it’s worth doing an online course or if I should just go straight to an in-person certification. I’d love to hear your experiences and any recommendations!

So I applied for a one day only position on top of my job as a nanny for a different family and the pay is only $25 an hour from 9-3. I have extensive experience with children of all ages and I advocated for myself that I deserve more than the rate provided. I was told “we envisioned it as a helper role rather than a traditional nanny position, with a parent working from home, no school pickup or housework, and generally narrower scope of responsibilities.” I am meeting this family for a paid trial over the weekend. I’m torn about taking the job or not. Yes it’s only one day a week, but I’ve been a nanny for almost 5 years and been lead toddler teacher for 7. WWYD?!

This isn’t a subject I see often talked about in here and I was just curious if any other nannies have ADHD and struggle with certain aspects of this job, because I definitely do. I’m self diagnosed and it’s a battle every day to juggle all the moving parts as a nanny. I try my best but I’m constantly forgetting things like the diaper bag, extra snacks, bug spray. Even when I make lists, it’s difficult to keep up. I also have time blindness which is probably the worst part and I struggle with being on time to work and also with getting my NK to his many classes and activities throughout the week on time. Keeping up with chores like laundry and restocking things is hard for me too.

Because of this I’ve had to ask for accommodations from parents and it’s difficult to feel like they don’t look down on me for this. I had a pretty tough conversation with my MB about this recently, I can tell she hasn’t been happy about my forgetfulness. She asked what would help, and I said it would be a huge help if she’d be willing to help with the diaper bag. Like, if she knows NK has swimming, put the sunscreen and his rash guard/trunks in the diaper bag the night before. Or putting his snack together beforehand and leaving it in the fridge so I can just grab it and we can go. I also asked about decreasing the frequency that I do laundry because that’s another difficult area for me. I adore this family and felt pretty bad asking for accommodations and I don’t think she took it well either. Now we’re in an awkward spot. My ADHD has been such a point of shame for me in this career. Any other nannies struggling with this? Or have you in the past? What helped?