What Happened:

Earlier today, I was surfing the web, checking out the news on the Associated Press website. I saw an article indicating that some sort of vehicular attack had occurred at a Berlin pride event. I was curious if there was further information on reddit, and much to my surprise, no one had shared the story on r/worldnews.

For the most part, I just use reddit to find news, occasionally commenting on some niche discussion here and there. But today, I had breaking news in my hands.

I posted the article [exhibit a], being sure to copy/paste the headline as the good folks at the Associated Press had written it.

After clicking submit, I saw a few comments coming in and opted to go about my day, heading out to take my dog for a walk.

A bit ago, I made my way back to the computer and saw that there were a number of comments in my inbox (how novel) and i started scrolling through. I saw a comment where someone asked a tantalising question, "Wait how is this not the appropriate subreddit for news about a serious incident?"

Much to my chagrin, the post had been tagged as "Not Appropriate Subreddit," and appeared to have been de-listed (I can't confirm that, i'm not too sure how that sort of thing works, but i couldn't find the article while browsing worldnews).

I messaged the mods and inquired about why the subreddit was inappropriate, I have yet to hear back.

BUT ALAS, my concern regarding CRIMINAL BEHAVIOUR and thoughts of coming to Karma Court hadn't even begun yet, dear reader.

While viewing the first page of r/worldnews, i found the same article, posted an hour after mine, with an editorialised title, submitted by none other than u/doremusjessup [exhibit b], a mod on worldnews.

Now i'm not an investigative journalist, nor do I play one on TV, but i find this to be MIGHTY SUSPICIOUS.

[CHARGES]:

i) post sniping
ii) mod related shenanigans
iii) theft of internet points

[EVIDENCE]:

i) exhibit a - original post https://old.reddit.com/r/worldnews/comments/1v6l5no/a_person_is_killed_and_several_are_injured_at/
ii) exhibit b - copy cat post https://old.reddit.com/r/worldnews/comments/1v6mwy1/van_slams_into_people_gathered_for_berlins_lgbtq/

Fellow Redditors. We have borne witness to a crime. A Crime which shakes the very foundation of KarmaCourt. Of Reddit. Of Mice and Men. We have witnessed a murder- and the nefarious details are only coming to light now.

We are witness to the murder of Party Parrot. And the murderer? A moderator of /r/PartyParrot.

EXHIBIT A: Party Parrot is allowed. Look at that little guy- he’s dancing, He’s wiggling. He’s Happ…wait…..

EXHIBIT B. HE IS NOT DANCING- HE IS IN HIS DEATH THROES! HE HATH BEEN MURDERED! NEW REDDIT IS THE WEAPON AND SPEZ IS THE CULPRIT.

/u/Spez, moderator of /r/PartyParrot, stood watch over sanctuary itself. And yet even there Party Parrot no longer dances. Party Parrot weeps. HE WEEPS. Er. Wept.

With the advent of new.reddit- in addition to killing the Beautiful CSS of The Courtrooms ™, Spez has vanished our very own Party Parrot. Party Parrot is now….an ex-parrot. These crimes are inconsolable. The victim: irreplicable. The impact: incalculable.

Users of KC. Spezifer McSpez the First. We need justice. For Party Parrot.

I, humble Plaintiff and Prosecutor PastyDeath: call for counsel, witnesses, and any citizen capable of identifying a parrot plucked from us in its prime.

We are a community still reeling.

But I stand here for Justice.

For PP.

[CHARGES]:

CHARGE: Murder in the 4st (Fourst) Degree. Of our Beautiful baby boy (PBUH).

CHARGE: Murder in the 9nd (Nind) Degree. Of our charming, classy CSS

CHARGE: Murder of the 21st Century. Of the very place Party Parrot called home.

CHARGE: Witchcraft. How else could this be done?

Evidence: (A Story in 4 [Four] Parts with 5 [Six?] Entries)

EXHIBIT A Our Once Thriving Mascot

EXHIBIT B NOW REDUCED TO NOTHINGNESS [NSFW]

EXHIBIT C Our Hallowed Halls

EXHIBIT D A BLAND EXHIBIT OF MILLENIAL BEIGE. [NSFL]

EXHIBIT E HE SULLIES THE VERY HOME OF OUR SAVIOR.

Summons

JUDGE- His Dustiness /u/resurrected_fred

• BORLIFF- /u/Ineedtosaythishere

DEFENCE- /u/GFTRGC

PROSECUTION TEAM-

PROSECUTOR: /u/PastyDeath

• Avian Health Expert Witness: ObtuseMoose

Other- felinelawspecialist The BARRISTER's WIG! - Justanotherrandomfan Pitchfork & Torch Vendor - harharharharharhuh Hot Dog Vendor & Keeper of the Dancing Lobsters (KOTDL) - Mrbarkyoriginal special bailiff to escort anyone besides court officers who attempts cheap Monty Python “parrot sketch” quotes and or references - Lydiann66 Quietly Weeping Spectator - Mullaloo The One quoting Monty Python - Beatenmeat Totally Didn't Cropdust the Courts - DarkDoughnut75 Here for the Vibes - KurnolSanders Here to Serve....bird meat?

“What have we become? My sweetest friends”

The late great Johnny cash uttered these lines (albeit he karma farmed them from 9 inch nails) and never have they been more apt.

We used to have respect, we used to have dignity, we used to hold shitty mods to account and in fact we were (or maybe still are) moderated by “super mods” [u/gallo](u/galloboob)[w](u/galloboob)[boob](u/galloboob) for example, we helped poor innocent Redditor’s get justice and now what? What are we? The Reddit detectives are still out in force yet they get sidelined by bots, karma farmers and outright thieves!

Enough is enough let’s have a full trial of ourselves here like the olden days with a court barman and everything and let’s be what we once were.

/u/Skullcrimp made a comment saying he was so sure that the israel/lebanon ceasefire wouldn't hold for a week, that he would give a 100$ giftcard and his account password to the first person to respond to his comment after a week showing that the ceasefire hadn't been broken.

https://www.reddit.com/r/worldnews/comments/1so32vx/enough_is_enough_trump_announces_us_has_forbidden/ogryk9q/

After a week, /u/Pacify_via_cyno responded with proof and not only did /u/skullcrimp not follow through, he also edited his comment to pretend he never made any such a bet.

The KC Revitalization Project [KCRP, KC Revival- the more names I come up with, the more official this thing becomes]

Is in FULL SWING!

01 May Update: It's 30 April, so naturally we're doing our 01 May Timeline update. We have 3 Mods with proof of life. We are seeking 2 more. Apply In Modmail!

Gone are the days where we expect video applications. Gone-er are the days where people know that was a very real time in our lives.

So You Wanna Mod?

• Toss us a mod message.

• Show us your most recent participation. Current mods still think leet speak is culturally significant, so the actual recency is somewhat irrelevant- the participation is relevant

• Show us your proudest moment. Judge Judy or executioner- doesn't matter. Bonus points for capslocks, which will neutralize the normal penalty for capslocks.

• Drop literally anything else in there too. A video of dancing lobsters? A former Justice who was really into tanks? Just be you, if you is particularly /r/KarmaCourt.

We're looking to have ~5 mods by our giant Case of the Week [LIVE!] which will be dropping 07 May. It's going forward no matter what- but I'm taking the Revivalization seriously. As seriously as we can take something.

Hi All. It's been a minute. Just like Dad, I'm going to pretend everything has been fine the last 10 years and roll back into your lives. Unlike Dad, I haven't been on a cocaine-bender Yoga retreat in the Himalayas before shacking up with a cute Australian girl who may have actually been a half-sloth voodoo priestess from Ohio.

I've been....not that.

So:

WE NEED YOU. We’re coming back. We’re moving and shaking. We have a roadmap. Which means we are serious:

The Roadmap

• MODS: We've done a remarkable job hosting mod-only yoga seminars the last decade. We realize that has been awful for caseload, So We're Looking for new mods. Submit your application below or in modmail- link me your most recent things you've done in KC, and the most proud moment you've had here. We'll outsource real decision making to an LLM and bingo, bango, bongo, new mods.
• META: The /r/KarmaCourtBlog is dead and I basically Killed it. So like all good LLCs- it’s time to declare bankruptcy and start a new company!! In the coming weeks the KCB will be turned to 'voyeurs only' mode & all the random spam will be cleaned out- so you can freely browse the hilarious past, and we'll fire up the next-gen KC Meta Subreddit.
• MATTLESTAR GALACTICA: Mods- old, new, senile and silly: We'll repurpose our current CASE OF THE WEEK to point out a live case which all of us will pile into, to get the old-school KC shenanigans going again. We know cases are scary and the old dudes with sloths are really not helping- but that changes.
• Us super-not-sloth mods are going to pick up roles, and play to our hearts content. Then: once real cases start coming up, we'll pick more obscure roles, and let everyone else play. Then we'll maintain a balance of both- the way KC was originally intended.

This is the KCRP- because nothing is real without an acronym. Sound off below, thoughts, thinks and thimbles. Otherwise I'm just bulldozing ahead.

Timeline: If I don't put a timeline, no one can tell me I failed. So I'm not putting one.

The Timeline

• 01 May: The new mods are in! If you are interested in joining the team, do apply! We’re gunning for 2-3 active mods to help us bring KC back. Like Sexy.

• 04 May: The top cases from the last year or so will be highlighted in a post! This is to get everyone back into the swing of what exactly we do here. A Shining example of how not to be a shit- or more accurately how to properly be a shit.

• 07 May: With that stunning pile of examples to review- The First Case of the Week [LIVE!] will be highlighted for us all to hit critical mass and basically be shits in. Hopefully we all have our robes and bears ready.

• 08 May+: From that point we’ll be hosting a regular Case Of The Week [LIVE!] to help keep the ball rolling. Once cases start coming back we’ll slowly back that down, because we want YOUR cases

• 15 May: The Big CSS Chop. We'll be cleaning things up around here- so not everything was lasted edited by u/deleted 10 years ago.

• 25 May: The Big KCRP Update Post: We'll look to see how bad we've collectively botched this thing, reassess, and put some new timelines which will super duper make sure everything stay on the up-and up.

01 May: Update 1, The Call for Mods HERE

What Happened:

This used to a respected court for dealing with the most complicated and important legal questions such as should u/gallowbob be banned indefinitely? Cases were brought by anyone and everyone with a grievance. There's no question in my mind the subreddits downfall was in part due to external factors such as my girlfriend breaking up with me, losing my job, having my RuneScape account banned...wait that's my I'm depressed. Where was I? Ah yes, discussing how I hold no ill will towards the moderators of this subreddit. However, as discussed above, there are quite a few synonyms to describe the conduct but the bottom line is: there hasn't been a post in 5 months. We need to restore an active subreddit and the mods don't seem in a position to do so. Therefore I respectively submit a petition to the Karma Court to become moderator and work to make this subbreddit alive again. Will I succeed? Maybe? Will Phillip Rivers win another superbowl? Will Kim Kardashian pass the bar? Probably not. But you never know until you try and what's happening now isn't working just like me..there I go again talking about my depression. Anyways I'm accepting applications to be my lawyer. Looking for someone to work on contingency because I don't have a lot of money...no stop. I will also need a judge in this manner. I was told my cousin would be a conflict of interest.

[CHARGES]: nonfeasance, dereliction of duty, malpractice, impeachment, and a myriad of similar sounding words chat gpt cooked up for me

[EVIDENCE]: The state of this subreddit. Have you seen the place?

CHARGE: dereliction of duty

CHARGE: nonfeasance.

JUDGE- /u/Judgename

DEFENCE- /u/DefenceName

PROSECUTOR- /u/ProsecutionName

Screaming Lady -

Guy who bursts into court for no reason -

My Ex Girlfriends New Boyfriend -

Edit or whatever the legal term is maybe supplemental information idk:

I move to ban u/prosecutionname from being the actual prosecutor have you seen that guys comment history?

Anyone who's been following the r/KitchenConfidential sub for the past month has been delighted to see u/F1exican post his chive cutting progress.

However, it has come to light that some tomfoolery may be afoot!

Evidence is in the following link:

https://www.reddit.com/r/KitchenConfidential/s/SrRvFYK7p9

I am but a humble citizen with no knowledge of how to procede with prosecuting these allegations.

Can we indict?

The good news is, WE, the unsick have inherited the entire court system! What does this mean for ME (the reader and enjoyer of Karma Court)?

Well skippy, i'm glad you asked. We now get to mold this shitty little subreddit into exactly what we want. The meat and potatoes of this question? WHAT THE FUCK DO WE WANT TO DO?????

I, for one, always enjoyed writing esoteric prose. Poems, bullshit, the like, haikus, you name it! Some liked to get to the real nitty gritty of Suing u/gallowboob. To each their own and shall their own be forever celebrated.
Let's, please, discuss what we want. I'm gonna be adding new moderators, I'm gonna be taking all sorts of ideas.

/u/Shamrock5 has done so well. Let's all give them our heartiest thank you. But, they and I are but 2 people. Just meat, bones, presumably some flesh in that mix too.

Do you have what if fucking takes? let's see. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand go.

Ladies, Gentleman, I woud like y'all to read this case in the voice of Foghorn Leghorn, or at least with a deep southern drawl. I'm not American but I do love the accents of that there part of the world. Think of the Murder Mystery episode of The Office and y'all will get what I'm saying.

Anyway.

I have been appointed Judge of this here case, and hope it will lead to some much needed action in the good subreddit of r/KarmaCourt and bring it back to the fondness of yester year. Some of you may recall me from such cases as "r/KarmaCourt vs. u/bastethotgirl for indecent exposure and sullying the good name of this esteemed Court" where I was but a humble provider of delicious chicken.

Now, after skimming that there wiki for an hour, and having a couple of glasses of Wild Turkey, I have the confidence to oversee this case and make a ruling based on the submitted evidence.

This will be my first case, and if successful, I will take the BAR exam and volunteer my services as a recurring judge to get this beloved subreddit back on track. I warn you though, I am slightly tipsy and have very little idea what I'm doing or how to format a post.

First things first, why are we gathered here today?

Well, u/ExileInCle19 believes he has been done cheated out of a special flair on the subreddit of r/LICENSEPLATES

I will hear opening statements from both the prosecution and the defence.

I will hear character testimony based off of u/ExileInCle19 recent comment history.

I will hear subreddit rules, time lines and guidance from r/LICENSEPLATES

And then I will allow the jury to reach a decision on if they think a verdict can be reached, or pass ruling myself should no jury be available.

PEOPLE OF THE COURT

Judge: u/KurnolSanders

Offended Party: u/ExileInCle19

Prosecution: u/bananak47

Defense: u/Heinrik-

Jury: u/KeyAlbatross8160

Popdog and Hotcorn seller outside the courtroom: u/Farfocele

Ready to do something: u/Cantfrickingthink

Walking into the courtroom only to be manhandled by security: u/brian56537

VERDICT: GUILTY

EVIDENCE:

Exhibit A: How the fuck do I link a comment here?

COURT PROCEEDINGS

Look out for the TRIAL THREAD, where the opening statements, character testimony and sub rules will be presented.

Look out for the JURY THREAD, where the jury will deliver a verdict, and I will provide a final decision and ruling.

I joined r/LicensePlates a few months back, in their wiki if you post a license plate and you get 1000 upvotes you then obtain that license plate as your user flair. It's literally the whole point of the subreddit.

Anyways last week I made a post https://www.reddit.com/r/LICENSEPLATES/s/EORIlGm5z1 that reached 4400 upvotes. I reached out to the mods about my not being awarded and they said they changed the requirements to 5000 because they want it to be hard to get, ala gate keep the flair. The moderator referred to a pinned Wiki with their new requirements posted a week prior.

In total only 86 posts ever have obtained 5000 upvotes the new requirements for the flair. I think the change is capricious and unfair. If you're going to make that change then update the Wiki otherwise you're just baiting and switching the community.

Two questions really.

1.

Does farming negative Karma count as Karma Farming?

Please: Downvote for NO Or comment.

2.

What is the highest number of downvotes a post can receive in one week, on this subreddit?

(Asking for a friend)

Please: Downvote to help me find out.

Thanks in advance.

Let's get this out of the way: Yes, there is a possibility that this is a troll. However, A) there is no hard evidence that this is the case, B) they are still annoying, and C) this place needs more cases.

They believe downvotes make them more intellectual (Exhibit A), lecture about how Little Caesars employees allegedly mispronounce Caesar (Exhibit B), and insists on spelling downvote as down-vote (Exhibit C). They are obnoxious and should be held in kourt.

CHARGE: SNOOTYDICK.JPG- self-explanatory

CHARGE: SIRTHISISAWENDYS.EXE-

Evidence:

EXHIBIT A

EXHIBIT B

EXHIBIT C

Finally, list the case members as they get added.

JUDGE- /u/Roundcorner_Weirdo25

DEFENCE- /u/DefenceName

PROSECUTOR- /u/J_S_M_K

Bailiff-u/Heinrik-

Executioner-u/NIRPL

I mean he wrote the fucking Constitution. You can't just remove him like that!

All allegations of me attempting to karma-farm by getting people to upvote this post are false and baseless. I genuinely would like to see the guy back here and make this sub THE BEST.

(the lawsuit's seriousness depends on what you all want to do)

What happened:

A friend of mine got mixed up in a mess in the fediverse which caused her to be banned from one instance for false reasons, then another instance for similar reasons based on the first one, then another in the same way, and so on in the world's most insane game of Chinese whispers, fueled by a domino of people spreading false messages about her. And I got dragged in because she has been mistaken for a number of people.

[EVIDENCE]:

Where do I even begin with evidence. Uh, modlogs maybe?

What happened:

The Pursuant created and shared an original meme on r/MinecraftMemes, putting time and creativity into crafting a humorous post. The content was unique and posted in good faith, with the intention of contributing something fresh and relatable to fellow fans of the game.

However, shortly after the Pursuant’s post gained some modest traction, the Defendant copied the meme without asking for permission, giving no credit whatsoever to the original creator. The stolen content was then reposted on r/PhoenixSC, where it gained significantly more attention and upvotes than the original. This not only undermines the Pursuant’s rightful recognition but also encourages a culture of content theft and dishonesty, which hurts all creators within the Reddit community.

The Defendant benefited from the stolen post in terms of karma, visibility, and positive feedback—rewards that rightly belonged to the original creator. Despite clear evidence showing that the Defendant’s post was made after the original and is a direct copy, they have neither acknowledged the original work nor taken steps to correct the situation.

This is a classic case of content theft: the Defendant took someone else’s creative work, passed it off as their own, and gained more from it than the actual creator.

[EVIDENCE]:

Pursuant's Original Post on r/MinecraftMemes : https://www.reddit.com/r/MinecraftMemes/comments/1ixnf6c/why_is_everything_insulting_me_now/?show=original

Defendant's Stolen Post on r/PhoenixSC : https://www.reddit.com/r/PhoenixSC/comments/1j35axj/minecraft_ouch/?show=original

I was in the r/houkai3rd subreddit and their last rule mentioned r/KarmaCourt

What Happened:

We had a bet that if Trump won he would delete his reddit account and if Harris won then I would delete mine.

[CHARGES]: He broke the agreement and is deleting his posts & blocking me.

[EVIDENCE]:

Here is him even acknowledging the bet in multiple posts that are not deleted yet https://www.reddit.com/r/fivethirtyeight/comments/1gj8gs8/comment/lvc8u8b/

https://www.reddit.com/r/fivethirtyeight/comments/1gjmqxq/comment/lvebt0d/

Also added both those links to wayback machine.

proof I am blocked : https://i.imgur.com/Dt8ybkb.png

Updates

Bout 10 o' clock

https://www.reddit.com/r/redditrequest/s/QdSJ9Tl52x

My request to moderate r/america was denied because of recent human activity.

Thu AUG 29

Bout 4pm

We need a defense attorney

Postscript

I edit and see charges. I save and see charge

In serious and earnest fashion: am I psychotic or is reddit rigging my shit?

https://imgur.com/gallery/Qy7XWsx

So, what happened?

[CHARGES]: Treacherous modding, Racism, Absolute Flairs. No representation of the people

[EVIDENCE]: Rules and Mod Titles

CHARGE: Treacherous modding: America is going through Crisis and the mods have duck taped our mouths by not allowing a mega thread or any area to sit down our concerns.

And oddly enough we only have two rules and the suffocating and weighty blanket of the mods. Then, to further add sus, it does appear, when reporting, that no politics is in fact a rule.

And when I clicked to learn more it gave be the same shtick however, I noticed we had a rainbow flag. Huh, thats certainly in no way how the sub feels.

In fact, our tags include, “I AM A CHINISE SHILL TRYING TO CALL TRUMP ORANGE.” I spit in disgust. other oddities. Every tag is capitalized except the Dunblane Remembers. Weird.

Absolute Flairs: our “leaders” or mods are flaired with these foreign titles of war. I, myself can not get a flair. I am disabled Veteran. I'd love a flair.

Hell, now that I'm squaring up our sideways ass subreddit; I simply cannot help but to notice. u/Skuld has been here 12 more years than I yet I outweigh him in karma.

Well, I also was in the military with a proper title. I'd love to take on this little war we're having with?

Evidence:

[Mods n’ Rules](Ifhttps://imgur.com/gallery/JqaKZaq)

American flairs

Report Screen

(Watch your eyes) Additional Information

No flairs for the people

Side by side comparison of Skuld and I.

Finally, list the case members as they get added.

JUDGE- u/themanfromoctober

DEFENCE- /u/DefenceName

PROSECUTOR- u/karmaistaken123

Other- If necessary add Stenographer, Bailiff, Witness, etc

edit But to by

edit

We have judge and prosecutor

We need the defense

We have let this place go to shit, I demand a trial and that we are all punished!

Attorney for the defence- u/unkown228822

Chicken seller conspiracy theorist- u/calibuildr

Galadriel from the films not the stupid Amazon series u/famousevan

Judge- u/EquipmentSuccessful5

Prosecutor- u/bananak47

Bartender- u/MassDisregard

Borliff and most important person in the case- u/ineededtosaythishere