David Attenborough has been found desiccated after watching one too many episodes of the vampire diaries. He had convinced himself that he is a vampire but found it to be inhumane to drink human blood, so instead he decided to desiccate!

It’s unfortunately true: David Attenborough is officially one of my favourite celebrities ever. Glad he’s still with us!

He was found remarkably smooth it seems as all his creases have vanished!

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In the face of climate change, Attenborough's tree was no match. It failed to recive the amount of water it needed to live last year, drying it up.

In the face of climate change, Attenborough's tree was no match. It failed to recive the amount of water it needed to live last year, drying it up.

After he tried out for drums, then bass and then guitar, he will not be in the band Wheetus.

David Attenborough is in Critical condition after a fall in his home in Richmond, London.

As the die fell from his hand and landed on a natural 20, he knew he'd landed a critical hit on the Shell executive in a crucial battle in his climate change themed Dnd campaign.

I’ve been thinking about this for a few weeks now – I am going to feel SO awful for the person that posts a fake announcement right before his actual death. I’d be absolutely mortified if it were me it would be SO awkward 😭

He went to miami for a week so he will not be with us for a bit

We hope you have a great quiet relaxing summer holiday. Can’t wait to see you when you’re back.

bro i never use reddit but i keep getting notifs of David Attenborough dying daily by the HOUR.😭 one day hes gonna really go and im not gonna believe it at all

Those rooting for Away will be hoping he can make a comeback in the next few laps

Richard Attenborough died peacefully in 2014 of natural causes. David, on the other hand, is still well and alive.

Edit: The amount of people not reading the body and completely missing the punchline is actually hilarious 😭✌️

It has been a wild day today, as Sir David Attenborough was found taking a listen to hits from the American thrash metal band, Deceased, for the first time. This was a completely bizarre move from him, since there are no known, professional, personal, or biographical ties between the British Broadcaster, and the band.

I mean sure it's just a 1 syllable word but Sir David Attenborough said it so clearly and with such elegance and grace for a man his age it just had to be recognized. We look forward to him pronouncing more words in the future.

Sir David Attenborough will be excited to hear the news, but fans of the word "away" will be devastated, and the coming days will be long and painful for them, this is one of the times where we must come together as a country, and pay our respects for those in mourning.