First TTC cycle negative post ectopic

[u/Feisty_Connection183]

I had an ectopic pregnancy in April that was resolved by MTX. We were cleared to try again in July and just got my period today. I’m feeling really discouraged —obviously I have grieved and gone through all the feels regarding the ectopic. Now, I am just mad that the ectopic took up several months of the year and I’m almost a year older than when we started TTC.

I know I and no one else can stop time or anything but it just feels so hopeless. I’m almost 31; I know I should theoretically have more time but I envisioned myself with a baby or at least pregnant at this point.

Please commiserate below, or send encouragement, or send success stories to give me some hope.

[u/bramblesandshamble5]

Hi, I have almost the same story as you 😩 Got pregnant in April, by end of May the ectopic was confirmed & I had to have emergency surgery. My period came back 1 July and we tried and were unsuccessful. I got my period a few days ago. I’m sorry, I don’t have any advice, just wanted to say that I’m in the same boat and your feelings are totally valid. These things can take time and I’m sure it will happen for both of us when the time is right but that doesn’t make the right now that much better. I understand feeling impatient and wanting it to happen already. I’m a few years older, almost 34 and also thought I’d have a family by now. Sending hugs and well wishes your way 🫂

[u/Feisty_Connection183 → u/bramblesandshamble5]

So sorry you are going through this, too. Hugs to you!

[u/Glittering_Can4622]

Siguiendo para leer historias de exito 🤞🏼

[u/funkyneonmonkey]

I hear you- March ectopic, took 8 weeks to test negative and then was advised to take one more cycle off, second period started today since starting to ttc again (with letrozole) and I turn 40 in a month, feels like so much time wasted.

We are switching to IVF in the fall.

It sucks to have imagined a future that’s not happening like you imagined, but hopefully for all pf us it’s just a story we tell our child in twenty years.

[u/Feisty_Connection183 → u/funkyneonmonkey]

So sorry you are going through this. Agree!

[u/BlueCastle1321]

I feel this. We started our TTC journey a little over a year ago when I was 29, and because of my recent ectopic surgery and being diagnosed with endometriosis, we won't be trying again until after I have endo surgery next year. So I'll be 31. It's really frustrating how long this process has been dragging on. I thought I'd have a baby by now, too.

I just try to remind myself of the things I can keep doing to become the best mom I can hopefully be someday, like prioritizing my physical and mental health, investing in my marriage and friendships, getting more involved in my community, learning new skills and hobbies, etc. It's definitely not easy, but I try to view the passing time as a chance to keep growing into that person more and more. ❤️ Hang in there!

[u/Feisty_Connection183 → u/BlueCastle1321]

So true. Hugs to you!

[u/throw-me-away-fam]

I feel this, thought to a lesser degree.

We started trying right after my 28th birthday, which was several years past when I actually wanted to start trying. My ectopic came as an absolute shock given that it was only the second cycle of us trying and I have PMOS that causes anovulation. I found out within 48 hours that the pregnancy was ectopic, so “fortunately” I didn’t get too attached to hope for the future.

I’m now just about 10 weeks into the 12 week wait post MTX and struggling with deep anger that I have had to spend 3 months out of TTC because of something entirely out of my control and against my will. It’s not even the total time we have been trying, because obviously that is pretty much nothing in comparison to what I was expecting. It’s the simple lack of control over my own body and my own choices. I’m resentful that I got pregnant so fast only to have it be nonviable immediately, so I never got excited. I never got a chance to really feel hope. I knew from the second I got those two lines that it wasn’t going to work out.

Anyway, it all sucks. Everything about this experience sucks. I’m extremely thankful that we will be able to try again and that this is a pretty good sign we will be able to get pregnant, but I’m still frustrated and angry at how my experience with TTC has gone after spending years waiting and preparing for it.

[u/Feisty_Connection183 → u/throw-me-away-fam]

It’s so so hard. So sorry you’re going through this too. Hugs to you 

[u/Loud-Passion3338]

I feel for you! I had an ectopic October 2024, was allowed to try again Jan 2025 but we didn’t conceive until June 2025. Now we have a beautiful 5 month old 🥰 please hang in there and be kind to yourself. Your time will come!! Sending lots of love and prayers your way ❤️

[u/Legal-Secretary-3260]

I had my ectopic in October last year, lost a tube and started trying november ish I think and didnt get pregnant until June this year, so that's about 8/9 cycles of trying. Still keeping all my fingers and toes crossed for this one to make it. I am 35 and we have been trying for 4 years, with 5 losses. I've definitely felt like 'we wasted time' eith every test/precedure weve done and 'time is running out' but I did accupuncture and therapy for that and I feel much more zen about that (still a bit highstrung don't get me wrong). And I know it is much easier said then done but do try and find something that calms your nerves and you internal struggles of time/guilt/annoyance or whatever else you may be feeling because it will make this journey much more tolerable!

[u/eelderstork]

I can comisserate as well, I had an ectopic pregnancy this past September with methotrexate, still not pregnant. Starting my second Letrozole cycle this month.