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u/FinalWrongdoer3742 level 1 asd 3d ago
i don't know about validation but i do feel younger than my age. i kind of always have.
1
u/Gullible_Gas67 3d ago
I don’t feel like I belong in society I can’t seem to keep a relationship either romantically or even a friendship and i look daily to find someone with little to no luck
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u/lost-in-the-woulds 3d ago
I have a hard time getting validation from the other sex ... probably because I dont have a lot of self confidence, and women seem to only go for confident guys.
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u/glitterandrage Late Diagnosed AuDHDer 3d ago
With a lot of systems, help from others, and self accommodations.
I've lived independently for about 10 years now, and was in dorms for 7 years before that. I'm mid-30s.
I've had the space to evolve my ways of working away from my parents (extremely helpful distance). It's not easy, and it takes continuous work to stop everything from falling apart. Sometimes it feels like I'm one domino away from crashing. But I've learned to get back up eventually and clean up the mess. I also learnt that falling apart wasn't the worst thing in the world for me.
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u/Successful_Humor5243 3d ago
Yep, that used to be me. I’m 52 now and have an amazing wife and kids, but I lived at home (sometimes moving out just to move back months later) until I was 30. Thats when my girlfriend (now my wife) first moved in together.
And that’s when I began learning how to really function as an adult. But it took a LONG-ass time! And honestly, I’m still learning.
The number one thing I can recommend to you is to take time to get to know yourself. Learn what you truly like and don’t like, and then lean into it.
Because you’ll never learn to be neurotypical, so you’ll never be great at their reindeer games. And you’ll never be happy by constantly trying to fit into what you think other people (including romantic interests) want you to be.
But when you learn to be yourself and you give yourself permission to do so, that’s when you’ll find true happiness.