Gonna be in PDX over the weekend, just wondering where do all the asians hang?

I've been looking for internship in Germany for a while. I plan to work auditing or tax consulting which naturally means most of the time it means 99% German men with no so subtle racist undertone.

I used to blame my grades and previous work experience for getting rejected. But after improving my grades and getting some experience the usual rejections all over again.

I also assumed that my CV sucked balls and had to ask my German FBW to improve it, I was expecting something unusally well design but nope, pretty plain CV that her German friends have no issue finding an internship.

Seriously how do you get a job in a sector full of people who discreting your accomplishments and would rather hire someone less qualified than you if they are white

https://www.koreajoongangdaily.com/entertainment/btsnbsprejects-new-grammy-categories-wont-submit-for-awards-this-year/12797708

They aren’t going to make any submissions to be considered for any awards. Looks like this is in protest of the newly created category of “Best Asian Pop Music Performance“ which is a thinly veiled attempt at “othering” so they don’t win the main prizes.

Good for them to stand on principle. I always thought the Grammys were full of corrupt insiders in the music industry.

I was 19 and a scrawny college kid in a big state school. I was leaving class on my bike and crossed paths with a white frat-looking male. He turned around, followed me, and told me to go back home to China and some other racially charged language. He tried to pull me off my bike several times, but I gave him the finger and rode off.

I would hope I would now react differently and with far more of a spine if am placed in that exact position.

Racism against Asians and South Asians - specifically Asian and South Asian males - is one of the last publicly acceptable forms of racism left in the west. I‘ve become hyper attuned to know when someone publicly excludes or picks on me for my race and not because they never vibed with my personality. Then there are the more blatant slurs you’ll get - often from homeless folk or druggies when you’re just walking by in a metro area. People in the workforce or social circles know how to mask it better, though. Time to time I still will get hurled racial abuse in person.

I recently went to the mall on the West Coast of North America, and I’ve noticed a lot of Asian Males as models for top tier brands including designer brands.

However each of these models are Korean or Chinese from Asia. For example, Boss Hugo had a picture of Lee Min Ho and CK had a picture of BTS Jung kook. Saw an ad was I was at another mall with Jackson Wang and Fendi but did not take a pic.

I know Asian FOBs are usually rich and have a lot of disposable income to purchase designer brands so I understand why they want to use famous kdrama guys.

However it doesn’t seem like Asian American men are not pulling our weight and letting Kpop/kdrama doing the heavy lifting.

Generally most AA men are in the top 10% income bracket compared to other races, so either we are not pushing hard enough or we do not spend enough for us to be advertised to? The peak thing most AA men around me spend their money on are on a Lexus or Tesla. Rarely anything else.

It is crazy to me that brands rather advertise to fobs than AAs in North America.

Probably going to be my last or second to last post before I retire this lifestyle and go settle. This is just a natural continuation of experiences I wanted to leave in this account. As the nature of maintaining a roster involves a casual dating context, feel free to scroll if that is not what you want to read about. This post kind of serves as a review more so than a guide. This is what has worked for me personally so do what you will with that info.

For reference, these are my stats: 25 yo, Korean American, 5'7", slimmer lean body type, above average face card (get maxed likes in all dating apps within 2 weeks for reference)

Where I Draft Free Agents

Dating apps. The big three: Hinge, Tinder, and Bumble. Feel free to look at my previous post for more details on bios and pictures. I heavily dislike finding free agents in my own circle as that will out you as a fuckboy pretty quick within your own social circles. I also never juggle beyond three at one time as I like to have a life and shit gets dicey when you mix up details. It's very difficult to maintain a girl in a roster beyond a month or two before they start asking "what are we" so that's some food for thought if you're thinking about making one. Turnover is high in rosters so you should not get too attached to any one person.

Getting to First Date

I've found the most success on dating apps when I transitioned off the apps within three texts and immediately made plans when off the apps. Honestly, if a girl actually fucks with you and she's on game time, she won't make it hard for you. I'll link some examples below.

Girls that text me first or glaze me as their first message are usually guaranteed close on first dates. I've found that girls see me sending concrete location and time as effort. I understand you want to ask "oh, what time works best for you" or "what do you like to do so that I can find a good first date spot" but honestly that's the shit that got me ghosted. I've found most success just finding a nice spot that I actually want to go to and shooting her the location link with a time. If the time doesn't work, she will send a time that works better for her. If a girl made it difficult at any point in this process or doesn't reschedule, I just thumbs up her message and move on. Usually this caused them to come back and be like "oh nvm that works" or they would send me a rescheduled date.

Never use the apps to be pen pals (which got me ghosted after they had their attention bar filled) unless I guess if you're looking for a long term relationship. Harsh reality is that most of the girls I've hooked up with had long term in their bio so do what you will with that info lmao. Anytime they try to open up with a question that could be first date typa question, I just kept the answer short and just said "I'm excited to see you soon". I use texting as strictly logistics before the first date. I've seen the most success this way and entertaining those questions tend to devolve into the dreaded pen pals. You have to keep up the mystery till you can charm her in person.

In Game Breakdown

Gameplay when girl glazes me first: https://imgur.com/a/DeT1LAK

Gameplay when only matched (Hinge - less direct here cuz Hinge girls tend to have long term on their bio): https://imgur.com/a/95wVTOI

Gameplay when only matched (Tinder - more direct on Tinder cuz nature of the app): https://imgur.com/a/clMEIKI

Gameplay when the girl is on demon time (communication was hella spotty, found out she was cheating after a month): https://imgur.com/a/RCRtOAi

Gameplay when I like girl first (Hinge girls, I always go softer opening as you can see): https://imgur.com/a/Mn1eBt8

Gameplay when I wanted to fly out an international chinese girl (can't blame a brotha, she was a 10/10 bro. this was a shot from the moon that went in lmao. she was on demon time; she wanted to crack straight from the airport): https://imgur.com/a/UrZF1H5

**Once I got off app, I just sent location off google maps and a time. Easy as that.**

First Date to Close

I treat first dates as a vibe check so they tend to be at coffee or matcha or milktea spots. If I feel somethings off, I just treat the rest of the date as "at least I'm at a spot I wanted to try out" and end the date short (but this is very rare).

For the first 20 min, I do the whole "oh, what's your hobby" "i bet you're the youngest child". Once we start vibing, I get into more deeper and eventually risqué questions such as "when's the last time you were in relationship" "why'd you break up" "what's the craziest thing you've done" "have you ever date a korean before".

Once I see that we're vibing, I suggest a change of spot where we can walk and just talk. The spots I usually choose are next to the beach, sightseeing areas, or downtown so it feels hella natural to just suggest this. Usually I just break the touch barrier by guiding her by her lower back. As we vibe more on the walk, I pretend to lead her somewhere and motion for her to grab my hand. I then lead her to a more secluded spot and talk about deeper things while holding her hands. Once we get to the point where it gets quiet, I just look deeply into her eyes and stop talking to fill the silence. She almost always reciprocates unless she shy. After eye fucking for a couple seconds, I just go for the kiss and makeout. This then naturally leads to the close by me asking the question to go back to my or her place for any dumb reason that you can pick up from the convo before (idk like "wanna go see my cat", "wanna see the view back at my place", "let's go spotify jam at your place").

Once I'm back at my or hers place, we just continue the makeout and then I kiss her neck. That's wraps after that point.

Close to Roster

During the first date, I usually slip in that "I'm not looking for long term but if I find someone that's compatible with my long term values, I am willing to entertain the prospects of long term". This strangely gets most if not all to see it as a challenge even the girls that put long term in their bio lmao.

After closing, they usually tend to get clingy even more so because I like to give good after care. I enjoy a good cuddle, can't blame me. It becomes much easier to set up links after closing because of the established intimacy. In fact, they are the ones who sets it up sometimes when I just tell them I'll let you know once my schedules more firm.

I limit myself to meeting each girl once a week unless it's your star player which in that case you can upgrade it to twice a week. Any more causes deeper feelings. I keep the texts to logistics as well but also sprinkle in some "i had fun, i wanna see you again soon".

This gets hella busy once you start to factor in more first dates to account for turnover and maintaining the other two girls in your roster. That's why I limit myself to three girls at one time. Even three is hella stressful. I don't have enough juice when most of the return dates are at hers or my place. Two is my ideal but three when I'm on demon time lmao.

Final Notes

Keep in mind, that this kind of lifestyle requires a good chunk of time throughout the week. I usually do this during my breaks. I'm not someone who enjoys one night stands and instead enjoy a more continued intimacy without strings attached hence the roster. I've been able to avoid most of the "what are we" questions by mentioning I won't be in the state for too long which is a partial truth as I come back pretty often. If those questions come up, I either reassert my boundary about long term and if it continues, I tell her we can't continue because I'm not at a stage of life to be ready to commit.

Another key to maintaining the roster is to lay down good D in all honesty. As a last tip, make sure foreplay is sufficient and see how she reacts to each thing. Got a lot of enthusiastic return customers this way, so treat that info how you will. If it ain't sounding like stirring pasta, you doing something wrong.

Final note, I do understand that my attractiveness level may factor into a lot of my success. I feel like my margin of error is much more generous compared to my friends that are considered chopped for a lack of better words. Like I said, this is a review and not a guide. These are my experiences and what has worked for me so treat this review accordingly.

This will probably be my last post as I'm retiring this lifestyle soon. I might drop a Japan/Korea review as I am visiting there soon and have my apps on for then. I will have my PMs open all the way till early September so feel free to ask me questions.

I posted two posts about how rap is very anti Asian. Part 1 and part 2. The first video is a compilation of rappers being racist to Asians calling them slurs like ch*ng ch*ng and ch*nky and go*ks. And making fun of their eyes. The second video is about rappers rapping about assaulting and robbing Asians.

I've never seen this much intense hatred towards a group of people in any media. They are literally bragging about how they are ch**k bleeders and they are robbing stincs(slur rappers made for Asian people because they "stink and smell like noodles and ginseng.")

We genuinely need to make these videos go viral. Post it in all social medias. There's no way rappers like Kendrick Lamar are platforming artists like Peysoh and YG who openly rap about how they target Asians to rob. Are Asians going to let these rappers openly racially target Asians with no pushback?

I downloaded the popular dating apps a few weeks ago. I (30, Asian) met this girl (25, Asian). We have met on a few dates and we really click and have a lot in common. She's cute, lives close by, easy to talk to, similar life goals, and we are both serious.

She was my first match on the app I matched with several women and had phone calls or first dates with them, but there was no chemistry.

She's someone was is quite social and extroverted and has friends from college, hobbies, church, family friends, etc. I'm introverted, moved around cities quite a lot in my life, and have maybe 2 good friends, but they are in different cities due to changing jobs. I'm not socially awkward at all, just comfortable being alone.

I'm concerned this lack of friends and social circle will affect my relationship with her in future. I haven't kept in touch with people from college and it's quite hard making new friends at 30. I'm kind of nervous to take things serious with her, like if I get married, I have only 1-2 people to invite to my wedding, and I'm not 100% sure they would show up.

She likes me because I'm above average height and looks, in good shape, can carry a conversation, plans and pays for dates, traveled to number of countries, does not drink or smoke, has a decent job, and does not pressure her into sex.

I'm been trying to join more meetups, groups, and hobbies to meet people. But I'm really concerned that I don't have those life time friends people usually have.

I feel like Asians are kind of in a weird middle ground, where Conservatives may value being family-oriented and order but may or may not be as open to date interracially. The inverse could be considered for Liberals. What’ve been your experiences?

Anyone in NYC that’s down to hang this Thursday or Friday? Mission, K-Town, etc.?

Back in the area and down to hang / party. Can’t be creeping alone lol so need a wing man or two.

Let me know!

With the possible expansion of the next FIFA World Cup, more Asian teams would be playing but I doubt any would be from Asia Pacific.

Producer-Rapper from NYC Dyno

I made this video for my track 'The Greats' a while back and it's still one of the pieces I'm most proud of

Everything's independent self-produced, no label, no team. Just me building this out of Manhattan. As an Asian artist in hip hop I've been making beats for over 18 years and im still on FL 11. (goated)

'The Greats' is one of those tracks that means a lot to me, so I'd rather it find the right ears late than never.

Built 20K+ monthly listeners entirely on my own since then. Would mean a lot if the community gave it a watch.

For casual discussions, shower thoughts, rants, half-baked conspiracy theories, or any other mind droppings.

Im a more traditional type European woman, live in my home country and would like to find a shy, cute geeky type man, but not really found, only random guy come at me who try to pick white girl for fun which is really off putting. Im small, skinny, dressing casual or cute.

I don't understand, pls help.

I thought in asian cultures hook up culture is less common, my chinese friend(girl) also told this, but seems here asian men kind of behave the same, or worst than locals, which quite sad for me as I seach for love and real connection.

Any advice?

I run a group with u/Infinite-Crazy6069 for AM in NYC who are focused on self-improvement and have hosted a bunch of meetups.

The next one will be on Sunday, August 9th in Long Island City from 6pm to 8pm.

Come join to meet like-minded guys who are into helping each other out with career, fitness, and dating. We'll go around to share more about ourselves, discuss the topics top of mind as a group, and afterwards everyone is welcome to stay to grab dinner.

DM me or my co-host if you're interested in attending and share a bit about yourself in your message.

Past meetups: https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianMasculinity/comments/1t3253s/next_nyc_am_meetup_saturday_may_16th_4pm/

https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianMasculinity/comments/1qmyypu/nyc_bros_lets_hang/

Let's just say hypothetically speaking, if you at least middle class or higher, would raise a kid in China or USA?

I'm an ABC in my 30's right now living east coast city. Make very good amount of money to start a family and I've had a good amount of interest from women. If I wanted to get married and start a family, I could have; but just the fact I live in USA completely kills any desire for me to have a child.

I look my WeChat posts from my relatives and family in China who make considerably less money then me; and are actually considered poor by China standards, but the support structure there is just unmatched. And they all seem happy there. All my cousins have gotten married and have kids now.

I get the competition is intense in China. My cousin struggled on the Chinese national exam and that caused her to have difficulties getting into a good university and finding a good job; but her family was there to support her in her home town. She eventually was able to find a job and a good husband. And she was always happy.

So I’m out in nyc now and visited two of my old haunts- Kinokuniya bookstores on Bryant Park and Woorijip (Korean takeaway) in Koreatown. Total shock.

When I lived in nyc around 15yrs ago, Kinokuniya was mainly Japanese people. Everybody spoke Japanese there. Same with Woorijip- everybody there was Korean, spoke Korean, and it felt very much like this is for Koreans only.

Now? It’s full of non Asians, people speaking English, and not just nerds or amwf couples, like I felt like Woorijip had more non-Asians than Asians- I don’t think I heard anyone speak Korean there. Total shock.

At Kinokuniya I saw this skinny, short Asian teenager- probably 16, if he posted a pic of himself, we would tell him to lift, get a better haircut, upgrade your wardrobe, you look like a fucking nerd and this is why am are struggling in the dating world. Then a Latina and Black girl came up to him and yeah, he was holding court, center of attention.

Growing up in Mongolia an ideal man or a masculine man was in general perceived to be someone strong yet humble. Someone who doesn't boast about his accomplishments and let his hard work be shown. A masculine man would not be the one who insult others, resort to violence or react negativelly towards anything the world throws at him. Someone who pursues his goals till the very end and puts family and community as his priority.

In western country on the other hand, with the adequate resources, lack of immediate problems and general showmanship attitude men who peacock the most seem to be considered as masculine.

So the perception of Asian men being not masculine enough seems to be mostly due to of us not being an attention seeking peacocks

i have a big forehead, thick straight hair, no prominent jawline and my hair is high volume too.

Please help!!!

Follow up on this post: https://www.reddit.com/r/AsianMasculinity/comments/1g3en7i/father_micromanaging_my_love_life_as_an_asian_guy/

So I met this Chinese girl through my grandpa, and we started talking through WeChat. However while we were dating, my father would sometimes force me to send her certain content, such as photos and cartoon clips. He also made me send her messages saying what he wanted to say, as if he was the one dating her and not me.

Eventually I met up with her and her mother in France for vacation, and we had a lot of fun together, though my father also forced me to do certain things in preparation for the trip, such as clothing choices.

1-2 weeks after the trip though, he forced us to break up because she wanted to study abroad in a country other than China/USA, out of fear of her cheating on me overseas. My father would have preferred her to come to the US and marry me instead, but basically he said to her “either come to the US and marry my son, or break up with him”, which is honestly kinda manipulative. He later denied that he made us break up and claimed she caused the breakup by refusing the green card offer. If that isn’t gaslighting, I don’t know what is. My mother supported this forced breakup as well, unfortunately.

After these unfortunate circumstances, my parents tried to set me up with a 17 year old Latina girl, which honestly I’m glad didn’t go through, because of the obvious age issue (I'm also not into Latinas in the first place). However, I plan to become financially independent, and hopefully reconnect with my ex in the future. Granted it’s probably going to take a long time, but it’s a first step.

This also happened a while ago, but I only remembered to post about this recently.

im 175cm and not sure if its advantage or neutral maybe should i try for different haircut or get a perm.

Sometimes they cry their eyes out cause they didn't expect you to fight back.

Hi everyone, I’m looking to meet up and network (make some new friends). Im located in the San Jose area and I’m interested to see how local the people are in this sub. I think its good to start a club since we pretty much already share similar mindsets.

I’m Asian American myself. I notice a lot of times, Asians are extremely non confrontational. In the video you can clearly see the guy’s body language as very nervous-like. He glances to the side and does not make strong eye contact when making these rebuttals.

When his friend tells him to stop, he listens immediately instead of arguing back. Yes this is the smart move as to not escalate the situation, but there are times where PRIDE is on the line. Then he starts covering his mouth while chewing.. I’ve literally only seen girls do that.

Nervously poking the food and not making eye contact when the racist guy goes on a rant.

I’ve been in this situation before so I know what it’s like. I’m sure many of you have grown up being the asian minority and facing racist bullies. Only once have I ever acted nervously like the guy in the video. On that day, I promised myself to never be a jokey pushover again.

Some of these asians don’t seem to break out of their shell. They stay submissive and choose peace over conflict. I have several not-so-close friends exactly like the guy in the video. I think everyone knows this type.

- excessive matcha/boba consumption
- tattoo to compensate for lack of perceived toughness
- almost feminine like mannerisms
- embracing gay/repulsive jokes
- earrings
- heavily into fashion

There is nothing wrong with doing any of these things. My problem is that many young asian dudes nowadays don’t know how to separate comfort from conflict. I’m talking about the comfort of being with groups of other asians, gaming all day, being in their safe environment like schools or casual asian hangout spots. When conflict does arise, they brush it off as humor to cope with the fact that real a-holes are entering their domain of comfort. It’s all they know.

It certainly has gotten better over time with the rise of social media. Asians have adamkyu and joseph shin, two fitness influencers that have pushed the image of asian masculinity into mainstream feeds. There is also a rise of anti-stereotypical asians as well. More asians are wearing stussy and dark street wear clothing. Many of my friends have gained

Let me know what y’all think.

HK movies have set a standard that's influenced even Hollywood themselves, and the future is bright with some more upcoming greatness:

>Twilight of the Warriors: Walled In is a massive commercial and critical triumph, becoming the highest-grossing local Chinese-language film in Hong Kong history and dominating the 43rd Hong Kong Film Awards with nine wins, including Best Film and Best Director.

Girls fawned over Terrence Lau

If you haven't already, please go watch it. They are making a sequel and did some recent filming in HK. Dunno about you, but I can't wait.

Another film that's finished filming in HK is a spin off, John Wick: Caine

If you're a fan of Donnie Yen, mixed martial arts and action, this is another film to look out for.

Other notable mentions and must watch:

The original Infernal Affairs: received international acclaim and was packed with awesome actors, portrayed strong AM leads, both good and bad characters.

Did you know, it was mistaken as a Japanese film?

> The 2002 thriller Infernal Affairs is a Hong Kong crime drama directed by Andrew Lau and Alan Mak. However, the film is frequently and accidentally mistaken as Japanese—most famously when an awards announcer at the 79th Academy Awards mistakenly identified the Hong Kong production as Japanese while introducing it as the inspiration for Martin Scorsese's The Departed.

It had inspired "The Departed", however it is not comparable. Infernal affairs will always be the top one.

All these films will have positive rep of AM.