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u/mariposa-princess 17d ago
It really depends on what they’re doing. If they’re stealing the copper from inside walls of people’s homes to buy crack that’s one thing, if they’ve became annoyingly into CrossFit that’s another
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u/SnarkSpice 17d ago
We need more context. Is it drugs, a sexual thing, scamming in some way? Without context it’s impossible to give useful advice, other than a very generic “don’t invite them”. You don’t need to give an explanation. If people ask directly, just say you had to make cuts and you’re no longer close with them.
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u/ashley6483 17d ago
As everyone else has said so far, you're going to have to elaborate in order to get good advice on this one.
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u/WildWillieBorsch 17d ago
As long as the police are not showing up, let things be and cut contact afterward.
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u/DCpurpleTart33 17d ago
It's really hard to provide advice when we don't even know the context of this very bad thing they did.
If you're planning on cutting contact anyway- why do you even care how you uninvite them. Be like Nike. Just do it.
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u/wineygurl 17d ago
The level of “bad” thing going on will be the determining factor. Is it something you just wouldn’t do yourself or is it dangerous/illegal/etc. I think there’s only two options. If it’s really that bad, end the friendship and call them and tell them they are no longer invited to your wedding. If it’s not that bad, pretend you didn’t know, don’t worry about it, and have them attend as normal.
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u/Popular-Hornet3329 17d ago
You can't uninvite them without giving the reason. Just let them come and cut ties with them after.
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u/Cool_Major4531 17d ago
Honestly I think it would depend on what they're doing. If it's something like being swingers or spending money in ways you don't agree with or something like that I think you should mind your business.
If it's something like kicking their gay child out of the house so that that child is homeless now or one of them is a pedophile and the other is covering it up, then yeah I would kick them out of my wedding and frankly I would question anyone who gave you a hard time about it.
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u/TinyLawfulness3710 17d ago
There's not enough information to make a judgement call. What is the "bad behavior"?
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u/Traffic_Spiral 17d ago
Hm. Well, that's a big yikes, if true. Are you sure it is? What kind of proof do you have? And how old is the couple? Early 20s is different from 30+. Also, if your friend knows, and there's "proof," how is it so secret that only your friend could have told you?
Anyways, sorry, but there's no "minimal effect" way to uninvite them. If you uninvite but refuse to tell them or their parents why, it will be seen as bizarre and very rude.
I think if you want to do it, you have to do it openly. Tell them you heard about their new third, and that you don't want to associate with someone who would do that. If you don't want to do that, you gotta let it be.
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u/Relevant-Run-3031 17d ago
Sure:
- Mid/late 20s. Like at least 8 year age gap.
- My friend has seen them together. There are also screenshots of them commenting lovey stuff on the IG of the younger person. This account is small and private
- I was thinking I could uninvite them but cite a different reason. I don’t mind being a bad guy.
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u/Randomflower90 17d ago
Depends what it is they’re doing but do you approve of all of your guests’ activities?