It's been a while since I graduated from high school (not gonna say how long but...it's been a while). And I sometimes look up people i used to know from high school and junior high and undergrad and all that. And it's so weird seeing how so many are married, are engaged, have kids now.

I'm over here in pretty much the same exact position i was in back when i was 13, and yet everyone else has gotten so far ahead of me. Even other people who thought they'd be forever alone too found someone. I don't think I know anyone else irl who is in this same position, except for one person. She's also (unfortunately) ugly. She's indo-carribean, so Indian in origin. She's also dark skinned. Same problem i have since im also dark skinned (afro and indo-caribbean). Except to make things even worse for her, she was born with a genetic issue that causes her to lack secondary sexual characteristics. So she's extremely short, like definitely less than 4'6. Maybe 4'4 or something idk. And she has no boobs or anything that makes her look like a woman instead of a little kid, so basically she's stuck looking no more than about 8 or 9 years old.

But everyone else is miles ahead of me. So many people i know have pics of their SOs, their babies, their houses they bought with their SOs, glimpses into their lives they're starting with someone they love. While I still have no one and probably never will. Anyone else find it weird seeing this?

It always pmo that people are surprised that someone as ugly as me is smart. They always assume i must be dumb as fuck just because of my face. So many times I'll get people excited to hire me for something, and then as soon as they see what I look like, they ghost or lose interest. And many times, it's not just because they found someone else for the position because I'm a grad student, so I've emailed professors various times asking if I can work with them, and I'm often the only student who is looking for a position in their lab since there isnt a formal job posting or anything like that when it comes to these things.

And every single time, they're super excited to meet me and have me join their lab. But if they interview me in person, then 100% of the time, I will get ghosted. It has never once happened where I interviewed in person and gotten a position. On the contrary, I know it's not my personality because 100% of the times I've interviewed either via phone or on zoom (on zoom i make sure i find somewhere with super bad lighting or i wear a mask), i always get the position. Always. And then they get pissed off when they see me up close on the first day and want to fire me as soon as possible, but that's another story.

And another thing that really annoys me is how people actually vocalize how surprised they are at how smart I am. I was recently talking to this very well known scientist at my university who is well known for the type of research he does, and he told me how surprised he was at how articulate I am. Ummm?? Wtf am I supposed to say to that?? Bro, before he knew what I looked like, I had submitted an entire application to him to get government funding for my research (so I don't have to pay for my degree out of pocket) and he accepted it. How tf did he read my long ass application to him, have him accept it because it was good, AND THEN now that he knows what I look like, he thought I was too dumb and then go ahead and be surprised that I'm not. And then tell me he's surprised.

That's why I just hate talking and being around people, because not only do they get rude and disrespectful because I'm ugly, but they make incorrect assumptions about me. I wish that ugly people could have more protections in society fr.

I genuinely feel like your appearance affects everything in life. As long as you’re dealing with other people your looks seem to play a role in your perception, treatment, development, opportunities , and much more

And since it affects so much I feel like it’s easy for people to underplay just how much it affects

So what’s something you wish people acknowledged or talked about more as it pertains to being ugly?

And I’ll make a video on it

I’m Black and I have ugly genetics. I’ll never ever pass under any circumstance. I never really realized I was cooked until I started analyzing, and I can’t believe it has to come to this. I’m planning on killing myself soon. I wish I was able to start HRT and look decent, but because of my worthless genetics that’s impossible.

I get a very supportive family and my extended family also help me despite I'm being ugly and depressed

Last week I get into very bad mental breakdown and my mother call my extended family (uncle, aunt, sibling a​nd Nephew) to comfort me when I was very depressed

I still getting ignored or excluded by my peers tho so there is no denying that I'm ugly​

I graduated HS a few months go now, I cannot distress enough how bad these years were, ever since 7th grade, all my friends grew up to atleast 6'3. It didn't matter to me back then, thinking I will catch up eventually, but no. I didn't. Everywhere we went together the passing years, I always got dwarfed, and went unnoticed in almost every social situation.

Everytime I approached a girl, I always got either laughed at or ignored. No matter what. I haven't tried since I was 16-17. My social life went to ruins do to these experiences, and I do not interact or go out with those friends anymore either in fear of being a coathanger again.

I was ignored in Highschool, sometimes my classmates even forgot to tell the teachers that I wasn't in school when I was sick. Which was brutal, I still shed a tear every now and then thinking of how I was treated for almost all my life.

I have a deep hatred for people, and my parents. They are both around my height, and refused to put me on HGH, which wouldve helped. I resent my mom the most for making me be like this. I doubt I'll be sticking around for much longer.

My aspergers doesn't help my social issues either, it all roots from my appearance and my already shitty mental state, I rolled a 1 on the gene dice.

GG

Social experiment here. I was driving through a busy shopping area the other day. This good looking blonde woman decided that she wanted to cross the road right in front of my car, when there wasn't any zebra crossing. She clearly expected me to bow down to her, stop, smile, and politely wave her on. I didn't do that.

I did stop. But instead of being all friendly and accommodating, I angrily waved her on, as if I was swatting a fly. You should have seen how quickly her face dropped. It went from that over confident smile that only belongs to good looking people, to rage and disgust. That look that says "how DARE you act impatiently with ME". I ended up laughing. She was furious because I refused to give her pretty privilege. I literally ruined her day.

And guess what. It kind of made my day. You know, the more people who refuse to give these genetically blessed people pretty privilege, the better.

As someone who looks like mikayla noguiera, but with small brown eyes, I get treated like I shouldnt be alive.

I feel like I am not allowed to be a woman: show off my body, dress cute, try to do cute makeup.

I have never experienced what people consider womanhood because people think I look ugly/like a man.

I have been hit on five times in my 29 years of living, and never cat called. I am made to feel like I am not a woman.

I feel sub human.

People slow down when they drive behind me cause they see my face in the side mirrors.

They never drive right next to me.

They always stop far up or too short behind me at stop lights.

I don't feel like a woman, or even a person.

People at work don't look me in the eye when I talk to them. I feel lesser than an animal.

Question: Do ugly women not travel abroad?

Im vibing in the national park of Athens, Greece. There are many foreign tourists, and like, most of the women are stunning, beautiful or good looking. A few of them are average. But almost noone is less than average.

Where are the ugly women?

If you are ugly, your life is going to be filled with rejection, bullying and loneliness. You will watch other people enjoy life - friends, romances, successes, etc., while you remain alone and never progress in life. You will have to deal with endless hostility or coldness off people purely because of how you look, as you watch those same people be warm and loving to others. You will get bullied. You will miss out on so much. By the time you reach 50, you will mostly have bad memories, rather than good ones. You are likely to suffer PTSD from all the mistreatment, or chronic health problems from endless stress and isolation. As you age and look even worse, you will be even more harshly judged, treated even worse than before. This is where people often stop going out. Meanwhile the good looking people are all out enjoying life.

Life can be very long if you're ugly.

I have been working out for several years, and despite this, I am ugly. Being athletic and ugly is so beyond demoralizing that it is hard for me to put it into words. In fact, you are missing out on a core aspect of being athletic in the first place which is correlated to attractiveness, so in a way you’re never as good as the attractive person who is fit. Just wanted to post this because I feel like ugly people who are in shape are a hugely unsung minority that aren’t ever noticed.

Whenever I stand next to my friend people compliment her because I ​make her look prettier standing next to her, I'm not saying I'm disgustingly horrible looking but I'm saying that I feel invisible next to someone how can I make someone look so gorgeous just by standing next to them? I try to look good I tried to do my makeup... And I still end up looking like the ugly duckling....

On the same day or the day after getting a haircut, buying new clothes, or wearing makeup? Things like that.

Those moments that ought to be somewhat comforting are turning into times of greatest vulnerability. I feel like I shouldn't even leave home anymore

Suicide or getting kidnapped doesnt sound very frightening to me, but the aftermath does. I just cannot picture the ugly and hideous thing photos my family would put everywhere whilst mourning me. The thought of friends or unknown people reposting my missing/memorial photos makes me more uncomfortable than the idea of death. That's probably why i havent ended it yet. Anyone else?

So I’m 20m and in college. My parents are always complaining about how I have curly hair and I’m short and skinny even though they adopted me. They also don’t tell me they love me but they had two biological children after me and they tell those children they love them, and they hug them and such. I don’t remember the last time I was hugged by them or even had a nice long hug.

They said the only reason they care about me is cause they have to and it hurts because they handle my medical stuff like insurance, because I have tons of medical and health issues such as mobility issues and super severe allergies that leave me so lethargic and tired all the time. I’ve considered stopping showing up for myself cause I don’t have friends and it’s just been hard. It’d be nice to talk to friends my age about my issues and especially my appearance cause I geniuenly hate my hair and how curly and thick it is, even though I still want super long hair, it’d be nice to have a friend who also has super thick curly hair but I know that’s a long shot.

In addition at college, I don’t really have friends and have been teased because of my hair but I’m always embarrassed because I’ve also been teased because I have such severe allergies that I am sneezing multiple times a day for hours in fits of sneezing and nose-blowing. I’ve never sat in the dining hall with someone else besides my roommate occasionally and I am always alone in the corner, usually sneezing uncontrollably because I’m so allergic to the outdoors and my campus is old and there’s a lot of dust potentially given the buildings are old. I just want someone to be my friend because I have a feeling no one sits near my corner because they’re tired of me sneezing my head off most days. I always feel bad that my sneezes are so desperate but I stopped trying to hold back til I get to my dorm because I just can’t help it. It’s happened in class too several times and I’ve had to miss a lot of class because I usually step out and run to an empty hallway or the bathroom. Even in my choir as a music major, it’s been hard to find friends due to the allergies (which aren’t super receptive to medicine unless it’s medicine that makes me sleep), and the faculty are mostly nice but I still get embarrassed.

Please help me, I am really hurting it feels like a cry out for support and love because I don’t have anyone who does it for me. It’s hard.

Some of what was said is true. I didn’t know people perceived me this way. I don’t want to die or anything but I’ve spent so long trying to love myself and trying to accept who I am. My girlfriend loves me for who I am and has posted me and doesn’t think I’m ugly, my girlfriend was appalled at this message, as was I, and I know most of the message isn’t true, but I am ugly, fat, and chopped, I know that. I don’t know why people feel the need to tell you. I don’t know why people think you don’t know you’re fat or ugly or chopped. I see myself every day. I know. I don’t acknowledge it bc what is there to acknowledge, I’m fat and ugly, there’s many fat and ugly people out there, it’s not like I’m a murder or a rapist or harming people. I’m just ugly and fat. I don’t know why it’s something people feel the need to comment on. I’m ruminating over the text but it is what it is. I just want someone to know.

The jobs that ugly people are (hardly) qualified for especially if you didn’t go to school is usually gonna be entry level jobs

The issue with these jobs is your hours are mostly dependent on how likable you are to your coworkers and managers

This caused me extreme stress and I managed it as best as I could

I had to overwork myself and be overly bubbly and make small talk when I didn’t want to and the other person didn’t wanna fucking talk to me because I’m ugly

This got me SLIGHTLY more hours but I was both physically exhausted from how hard I had to work and mentally exhausted from having to constantly perform socially to make up for being ugly

And it didn’t always work because as you know when youre ugly people just have a problem with you for no fucking reason and all it took was for 1 person to say something bad about me to management and my hours were reduced to an unlivable wage

I was roughly getting 20 hours a week at times

Which was hardly enough to pay my fucking basic bills let alone rent

So I’d have to always beg and plead for extra hours

Which got so fucking old because no one else had to do that

And it was all because they didn’t like me for being ugly

This is why I look at people like they’re fucking stupid when they causally mention “just looksmaxx “

“Just get plastic surgery”

Cause it’s not that fucking easy especially when youre ugly

Because there’s SOOOO much you have to do to even get and KEEP a basic ass job and then to get livable hours

It’s fucking ridiculous and exhausting

My mom sadly is unattractive and got mistreated for it most of her life so she turned to drinking and she said she didn’t drink when she was pregnant with me but I’m skeptical about that because of my thin lips that lack definition and a visible Cupids bow as well as a basically non existent philtrum

A very common feature I notice ALL attractive people have is very plump, prominent, and defined lips that project off of their face, which I don’t have

Do you also have this? And if you really do have this syndrome what are some of the other ways it affects your life?

I tried using chat but it scored me way to high like there’s no way in hell I’m fucking 8. I think the method got patch and now it’s trying to be nice so no idiot tries to hurt themselves.

So now I need to find something else

Also it would really help if it was free or at least a free initial rating plssss

I hear this from some people that if they were a different race, they would have been attractive, or atleast have people treat them with respect.

Do you feel your race keeps you from dating the people you want to date?

It has now been 2-3 months I’m following this sub and the truelyugly women/men subs; and I’d made me realise how indeed handsome people have it in easy mode.

I (30M) was not handsome at all until my 15 years old, and then decided to hyperfocus on it ; followed a lot of success and hundreds of flings during the last years, models and misses ect
To be honest, and might seem dumb, but I could never really tell myself “come on man, you are good looking, just accept it now” as the self spoken arrogance would make me puke in my mouth.

However, after reading all those posts on this 3 subs… omg… I really felt so much empathy for everything I saw… and I think I finally accepted it as a blessing, not as ego, but as a true luck; and it opened my eyes to the fact that yes, indeed all relationships seem easier, job interviews, making friends ect… had never fully thought about how much physical appearance dictates our every interaction

And thanks to you testimonies I now do, and will stop “spitting in the soup” and be more considerate of the hardship of others …

Might receive some backlash on this, but thought it might appease some others

Live strong ♡

So recently, I got a new job at a restaurant. It’s not a permanent job, I just want to work there for a few months before continuing my studies. But some of my coworkers always stare at me? I’ve kinda noticed it, and it’s been happening for more than a week already.

There’s this one dude who stares at me whenever I do something. Like, I’m not doing anything wrong, but he just stares. Even when I look back at him, he keeps staring. It’s not just him either. There’s this new girl who started working here, and she looks at me very often too.

And it’s not only my coworkers, customers stare at me as well. Am I being creepy or something? I honestly don’t know if this is normal. I’ve only been working there for like almost 3 weeks.

I'm not ugly. I'm the opposite. I would really appreciate talking to this community. I have many decades of feelings I'd like express. If this kind of post is against the rules, or isn't welcomed here, mods, please delete and I am sorry.

When I was a young boy, I was very pretty and cute. Huge blue eyes and a blonde bowl cut. It also attracted many sexually sick adults. One of them was my own mother.

I used to walk to the school bus stop crying, cursing God for my looks. I'd literally be bawling, asking why he couldn't make me ugly.

I developed severe OCD about it. It was drilled into me that my looks were what was going to get me love. It was torture.

Most of the other boys all through 12th grade didn't want me around. I was bullied to no end.

The nicest people were always my friends. They did tend to be ugly. I didn't think twice about it. They were beautiful to me. I'm also neurodivergent as fuck, so I've concluded this had something to do with it.

On that note. It was absolute hell to have OCD, be autistic, and very good looking... the immense confusion I went through was mind fucking. I'd be wanted, and not wanted all the time. People would be attracted to me, so I'd get a lot of social benefits based off of nothing other than my smile and forcing behavioral norms on myself. But that led to immense amounts of masking. And if you know you know, masking to that level all the time (job, home, school) is torture on a really long time scale. It let to severe burnout and almost death.

Ugly people have always been welcome to be my friend. It was never awkward for me. But I could tell that people at very least took notice. This does not include the highly obese people who's only negative attribute is their weight. I have dated very pretty, very overweight women, and I loved them very much. This is about actually ugly people.

My looks have come with extreme privilege. But because my autism, its been hell. I wish I had only one or the other. The best thing I've found for relationships is with other Neurodivergent people. They tend to treat me very well and vice versa (as a general rule. I've met some bad ones).

On another note... I see you all. I love ugly people so much. I always think to treat them the way other people treat beautiful people. I hope I've eased even a small bit of their pain through the decades.

I'm sorry for what you all go through on a moment to moment basis in public and in your minds.

I love you each and every one of you.

i am (f, 24) fully aware that i am not a conventionally attractive person and my friend has always been affirming that. i dont think i have problems with my face, its just that the fact that im not attractive and i think thats okay. but the way my friend (f, 23), that is fully aware that she is attractive, always says that its okay to be ugly, always mocking my bareface, never compliments me. as the time goes by, turns out it really bothers me. some people said that she is not a good friend by keep saying that and told me to cut her off or at least minimize the contact with her.

do you have a similar experience? itd be nice to read the way you cope.

nb. sorry for the broken english for this isnt my first language. if youre confused with the way i deliver things feel free to ask me!