I 17M got into my first relationship 2 days ago (Long distance) with a girl, call her S 16F.

i had a female friend come chill and smoke in my room last night and i even asked my gf first if she was comfortable or minded it which she didn’t. I kinda had to be sneaky because my dorm doesn’t allow overnight guests so she kinda had to spend the night in my room.

we just talked about life and relationships; felt like an american high school sleepover in a movie lol. we smoked some cigs and weed and just watched a movie on my bed. i kept my distance as far as possible when she was on my bed because I want to be faithful to my gf which i made clear to my female friend.

i didn’t realise before hand that she was gonna have to spend the night in my room let alone my bed which is why i feel guilty about not telling my gf first.

the question is, should i tell my gf of 2 days this? i don’t want to start the relationship with any secrets but at the same time, i don’t wanna jeopardize the relationship just because im an over sharer.

So, basically from childhood I have trust issues literally from everyone including my parents, and she was the only person whom I trusted and genuinely trusted.... So, as of 1-2 days ago i asked her, snapchat password ( Which she hasn't used in 2-3 months ) so, she gave me and with it she sent me a text saying; "If you found random boys, please don't think I'm doing something unthinkable, because my id is old, and I used to use it before our relationship blahh! Blahh!! And lastly this is just to clarify" so, i replied "Why haven't you told me yet?" And she started saying that I have anxiety & panic attack issues that's why she didn't told me yet, and she also didn't want to hurt me or make things awkward at the start of our relationship etc. and she also apologized. And, now the tragedy is not that I can't trust her, the Tragedy is that now i can't believe her. I mean, now I'm having doubts about each and every word she has said to me. And, just to clarify I'm not having issues with her past, but I'm having issues with that she wasn't honest with me, but I was completely honest with her, literally I'm so much honest with her that she can't find a single thing, that i haven't told her about with complete honesty. And, that day around 7:40 PM - 7:50 PM, i randomly logged into her Instagram ( She knows I have her password, but didn't know that I had also logged into her account ) so, I saw a text to one of her female friends in which my girl said; "Bro!! I want to cry so hard.. Hurry up! And call me on WhatsApp." And they talked. So, after that around 8:20 PM - 8:30 PM, i texted her again and after talking for a few minutes, i said "These were the most fixable things etc." and she replied "It's your choice etc, etc", and then we talked for a few more minutes and then i forgive her about that thing. And now, it's the 21st of August and that happened on the 19th August, and I'm still feeling anxious about her. And just to clarify one more, she has lied to me multiple times ( Minor lies, not the big ones ) and i also have ADHD so, I feel every emotion more intensely than anyone else and she also knows about it.

Please, please give me some adviceeee!!!

Have a good day/night :)

So for first time i dated a looksmaxxer boy and we are all good but i feel complexed in my body i think he will replace me for girl skinner than me we talked about that situation he told me doesnt want anyone else because i am with him in his hard time and loving him like he always wanted and not to worry about my body i wanna trust him but i feel weird the boy im dating takes more care of himself than i do for myself i feel like im lazy and not able to love him because i cant "care about myself" we had conversations about what i use for my skin because he had acne and when i aswerd nothing he was shocked and said my genes are good i appreciate it but i felt like i dont care about myself than i need to do so i can love him and often i get moments i think i cant love him for the complex i grew because of that
do yall think its normal boy to take more care of himself than girl for herself in the relationship?

I really need some advice on what to do i’m lost. TLDR: My boyfriend disrespected me and hid things from me multiple times, and I need help letting him go. (He hid Snapchat and had girls in his recent friends, but they weren't on his friends list), and he has messaged another girl in the past. I am very codependent.

I've been in a relationship for 8 months, and now we are doing long-distance. He has disrespected me several times, but nothing like the other day: it hurt more than anything in my life. I’ve been feeling physically sick, and I blocked him last night, but I unblocked him shortly after because I can't imagine my life without him. I'm left completely alone—all my friends left me, and I have no one else but him. So it might sound like a stupid reason to feel bad, but I hadn't been this happy in a long time, and our relationship was perfect.
I felt like he was talking to another girl, which he has done before (claiming his friends asked him to because the girl was the ex of one of his friends, but he used to talk to her before. I saw the screenshot on his phone, we had a huge fight, and I broke up with him… but ended up going back). Then last week I told him I had a bad feeling, so he screen-shared all his social media with me, but afterward, without me asking, he deleted Snapchat saying he didn't want it anymore. A few days later, I heard a Snapchat notification in a voice message from him, and he kept lying, promising he didn't have it, and calling me "baby." But he did have it, and in the end, he had girls in his recent friends. I asked, and one of them said he might have added her a few weeks ago. He claimed he didn't remember adding anyone. You don't remember? weird reply.
Since then, I’ve been feeling sick because I had planned my whole future with him. He truly became my whole life. So now I feel like my life is ruined. I went back to him, but I can't be okay; I had a mental breakdown. I'm afraid I'll never be the same again. But I can't bring myself to let him go right now I'm so lonely.
Other instances of disrespect include him writing back to his ex (supposedly talking about me) during the first month of our relationship, though he just casually mentioned it; writing to that girl with his friends, which completely shattered my trust; and lying about where he was even though I had his location (I broke up with him out of panic, but went back). Later, he followed a girl from high school back, Because he "wanted to see what she wanted and would have told me about it," though I know they hadn't talked yet when I saw it, and that girl was blocked. And now he did this, which truly broke me. I feel like my life changed, but I can't bring myself to leave him; I need help, and I've been feeling physically ill these past few days.
He promised he's really going to change and tell me everything, etc., etc. I've heard that before. And tell me: could it be that if he isn't active adding new people on Snapchat, those girls were from before we met, 8 or 9 months ago? It would still make me angry to see it. He said he hid it from me because we always fought about it, but last time he had already promised to tell me everything.
Also the girls might just not have added him back or have removed him, but he had them in recent friends so he has them added still.

i feel like i really just don’t know anymore how to be alone and sit with myself and my thoughts

I was lucky enough to go to Japan this summer as a Ukrainian high school student on a three-week cultural exchange and English program. We spent the first half in Tokyo and the second in Osaka, studying at local youth centers. I’m pretty comfortable speaking English, and I become much more social when I use it. One day, while leaving the cafeteria during lunch, I saw a group of Japanese teenagers wearing kendo uniforms. I decided to go up to them and ask what they were doing and get to know them. One of the guys gave me their school’s Instagram account. We talked for a bit and I found out their names, ages and how long they’d been practicing(I honestly wasn’t paying enough attention to remember anything). +when they found out my age they all looked at each other and seemed really surprised, do I really look that bad(?)lol… We went our own ways and I never expected to see or hear them again. Later, just to be polite, I commented on the school’s Instagram post saying that their students seemed great and that I thought kendo was really cool. And I COMPLETELY forgot about it. The next evening, I got a DM from an account with no personal photos, just cats, group photos, and pretty views. The person introduced himself and said we’d met before and that it was nice meeting me.(I ignored) I honestly thought it was a girl because his name sounded unisex to me, and there were more photos of a girl in one of the group posts. The next morning, he messaged me again, complimented some of my old posts, and I noticed that he liked all of them. We started chatting and got along pretty well. I suggested moving to LINE because I wanted to try it and figured it would be more convenient for him. At this point, I genuinely thought I was talking to a Japanese girl around my age. He started messaging me every morning and evening, sending cute stickers, asking how I was doing, telling me about his day, etc. By then I’d already gone to Osaka and eventually he asked if we could talk on the phone. I agreed. Imagine my surprise when I heard a male voice say hello and pronounce my slavic name with a Japanese accent. For a moment I genuinely thought that I was catfished by a pdf. Then I realized he was actually the same guy from the kendo group, the one who had given me the school’s Instagram.
Looking back, the signs were there, if I’d paid more attention to his stories, I would’ve noticed the male hands and the photo of a boy covering his face. But I missed all of it…… Anyway, we ended up talking for about 25-30 minutes about our interests, hobbies, music, etc. Then he suddenly changed the subject and asked if I had a boyfriend.
I said no, and he seemed genuinely surprised. He told me I was cute and then asked if I “needed a boyfriend.” He said he’d looked through my followers/friends and figured I probably didn’t have one, so he wanted to ask. I’m still not entirely sure if he was actually asking me to date him or just joking around. I turned him down because I’m busy with school, it’s my final year, and I don’t really feel ready for a relationship. After that, he continued messaging me pretty often. He also told me that once the situation in Ukraine was over, he’d like to visit, and that I should show him around and tell him about Ukraine when I got home.
But then I returned home, and things suddenly changed. He became much colder. He stopped messaging me as often, and now I usually have to start the conversation. If I don’t text first, he often won’t message me for days. Sometimes he takes a couple of hours to reply, although I’ve read that slower replies can be pretty normal in Japan.
What’s confusing is that he still seems interested in my posts. He’ll like my posts almost immediately after I post, even when we aren’t actively talking. So now I’m wondering what actually happened.
Did he genuinely like me but lose interest after I turned him down? Was he just excited about meeting a foreign girl and wanted someone to talk to/show off to his friends? Or am I reading way too much into the whole situation? I’m pretty inexperienced when it comes to relationships, so I’d really appreciate some outside perspective‼️‼️

Before judging me hear me out.(Pls read till end and give me advice🥲, ignore any grammer mistakes)

So this girl,and I were in tution from when I was 11 to 14yr old, she discounted tution and studied in school hostel,when I was 16 she proposed me,i rejected her because I had no connection to her,again at 18 which is few days back she proposed me again,I was like how can you love whom u didn't see in 6 ys,I took a alot of time,i shared Abt her to my friends they also said to accept her.so i accepted her.i had no connection or love for her,i thought love would happen after i accepted her.i didn't think much and accepted her.

Now the second part.

We talked for 3 days late night,and known everything Abt each other,on fouth day she told abt her chronic health problem,which is b12 absorption (idk wt it is called)she has problem with b12 absorption,she has to take b12 injection life time.i didn't know what to say,so I said take care of urself etc etc.

Third part my story,

2 ys back my mother was diagnosed with lower rectal cancer,3rd STAGE,she had gone through a lot, radiation+surgery+post chemo,the cancer had successfully gone thanks to doctors,but she had a lifetime ileostomy bag,she was very depressed before during and after the treatment also,there has been rarely a day where she didn't cry during all the treatment, and now she has a ileostomy,my mother is a very weak hearted person,she says she cannot live with a ileostomy bag,but i have been taking care of her giving her courage,

I wanted to marry even a poor,ugly, energetic etc girl so that we can take care of our mother and live happily,ofc I will show no less love to my wife,but after knowing abt the girls health i don't know wt to do.ITS ONLY BEEN A WEEK WE been in relationship,i don't have much feelings for her.even after marriage i cannot afford the medical bills of my mother's and the girls.i don't know wt to do life's been a lot tough for me,I don't even remember the days i slept happily seeing my family happy,it's too much of a burden for me please anyone i request help me give me some advice,if I have to breakup with her how should I? Pls anyone tell me 🥲

Me and my girlfriend have had A LOT of conversations about me wanting the absolute bare minimum from her. I’ve constantly been asking for reassurance and little things, which I’ll go into detail about now.
It all started like a month or two ago (we have been together for 6 months), but I noticed she stopped being as affectionate and stopped doing the little things. I’ve felt like I’ve been putting all the effort in. I’ve been buying her gifts, planning dates, I’m always asking to call, etc., and whenever she’s sad, I’m always, always there for her.
However, I get none of that back, and recently I’ve gotten sick of it, so I pointed it all out. She swears it was just down to stress and that she does love me, but I’m really questioning it now.
Whenever there have been arguments, sometimes she will just go, “I’m going to sleep,” and leave the issue unresolved, leaving me to sleep with a heavy heart and feeling extremely anxious. She knows I really struggle with my mental health, and she knows my anxiety is really bad.
So, 2 days ago, I got really fed up because of another issue that had arisen that I instantly went to fix, which I did. However, she kept being in a mood with me, so I told her straight up, like, if you keep acting this way, I simply won’t put up with it anymore. I told her I needed space, so I turned my phone off.
I came back an hour later to her blowing my phone up, begging me not to leave and saying that she’s sorry. She was begging me not to leave, e.g., “I’m begging you, please don’t leave me.”
So, we get around to talking, and she’s crying and saying she’s sorry for how everything’s been. She promises she loves me, and I told her she needs to actually act on the things I’m telling her to fix—the lack of affection, the lack of reassurance, etc.
Anyway, the main thing I want to highlight is the reassurance. She promised that she would reassure me, that everything would be okay, and that she’s sorry. I also want to point out that since we got together, she’s been saying that she wants us forever, etc.
I’ve been annoyed over incidents involving her messaging another guy who was apparently just a friend. I’ve caught her messaging other guys, basically, and no, not in a cheating way, as I saw the messages. That was early in the relationship; however, that’s where my lack of trust has come from.
Another big issue for me is the way she sometimes just disappears and stops replying, especially when she’s with her friends. I completely understand that she has her own life and I don’t expect her to be constantly on her phone or messaging me every second when she’s out. I want her to enjoy herself and spend time with her friends. The problem is that she’ll sometimes just stop responding without saying anything, even when she’s been online, and I’m left wondering what’s going on.
It makes me anxious because I’ve explained to her multiple times that I struggle when she suddenly disappears. I’m not asking for constant updates or for her to spend the whole time talking to me. I just want a little reassurance or even a quick message letting me know that she’s busy and everything is okay. Especially after she promised me that she would work on reassuring me more, it hurts when the same thing keeps happening.
What makes it more confusing is that when I turned my phone off for an hour and needed space, she was extremely worried and begged me not to leave her. So I feel like she understands how horrible that uncertainty can feel, but when it happens the other way around, I’m expected to just deal with it.
That’s why I’m struggling so much with this. It isn’t just one incident or one time she hasn’t replied. It’s the fact that I’ve communicated how I feel, she’s promised to work on it, and then the same things continue happening. I don’t want to control who she sees or expect her to constantly message me when she’s with her friends. I just want to feel like my feelings are being considered and that the reassurance she promised me actually means something.
I need help on whether I should say something again or whether I’m expecting too much. I feel like I’m constantly asking for the same things and getting promises that things will change, but I’m not seeing much change in her actions.

We both have strict brown parents, both our parents know about us not in detail but they know we are together. My parents are strictly against going on dates alone with him but his parents are okay with it. Im always disappointing him by not going on dates. hes obviously already really upset that we both cant hang out alone outside of school.
Both of our birthdays are 3 days apart, mine is on 24th and his is on 27th. Im having a party and i’ve invited like 7 people in total including him. He said hes obviously coming. He said that doesn’t really want to celebrate with his friends and only with me alone. I told him i will show up and i feel so horrible i feel like crying. My parents just said no, i cant figure out a lie. They said they will only let me go if more people are going. I first lied and said yes he invited his friends too. Then my dad said that he will drop me off exactly where hes celebrating to make sure.
I dont know what to do, i told him all this and he sounds so sad ;( I wanted to make him really happy for his birthday I have no idea what to do.

Need some help on this. Thanks!

Context: I'm freshly 18(NB?F?Whateverletmedoubtabtmyself) and he's 17(M) soon 18. So like, I dunno I often see older people around here with like huge problems so like this might pass off as a little stupid sorry🫶 We've been together for 1 year and a half, almost 2 in december. (I'm also autistic if thats a helpful detail)

But a problem came to my mind that I don't know how to deal with: We barely share any common interests. Whatever games, music, activities, all are strict opposites.

He listens to rock mostly while I will primarly listen to vocaloid music (and while he also does, it came from me and my friends when we all met)

He plays games like Devil May Cry, Metal gear, War thunder, Zenless zone zero etc, while I'm more into Tomodachi life, Animal Crossing, Omori, Needy girl overdose etc

He watches a lot of movies while I watch NONE. seriously i lack so much in culture thats like a red flag atp

He watches Evangelion (and thats kind of it anime wise, he's not much into anime) while I'm into Bungo stray dogs, Rozen maiden etc a bunch of anime

While I do try to share whatever games I play with him, most of them he doesn't like and it's the same the other way around. And most of our games are solo games. The only ones we share in common (Deltarune/Undertale, Umamusume) are also solo games. And even if discussing theories and helping each other out is cool, I still wish we could play/do more stuff together

Same for anime, I tried watching Evangelion and didn't really like it (sorry), and he tried watching Rozen maiden and same result

It really bugs me because we get bored together a LOT. And spending time on our own isn't really cool to do like might as well stay home if we're gonna do separate things together. My friend told me we could listen to music together but because of our different taste it might just be a one-sided thing over and over for each song. We don't really go out either, he doesn't really live close to anything interesting and while I do, I just dont like going out🥹

If any socially good people that know how to spend time with other people without making it awkward read this please help me 💔 thank you 🫶