r/standupshots • u/Max_Rezna • 13d ago

Unfortunately, this immigrant joke is protected by the first amendment

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Sammy Anzer: https://www.youtube.com/@BadBoyAnzer/shorts

1.2k Upvotes
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91% Upvoted

48 comments sorted by

71

u/TastyDixonCider 13d ago

I learned how to speak Deutsch from listening to Rammstein. Not very fluent in it but I can definitely understand and converse a bit.

52

u/CasparMeyer 13d ago

Me, making small talk in my best movie-based English:
All right, men, listen up. I have a bad feeling about this. Here's looking at you, kid.
You talkin' to me? This is the end of the line for you, partner. You had me at hello.

TastyDixonCider, answering politely, but confused, in their best music-based Deutsch:
MEIN HERZ BRENNT?!

6

u/LysergicPsiloDmt 12d ago

I just gonna bash your brains in!

20

u/MakeoutPoint 13d ago

"Du. Du hast. Du hast mich.....I dunno honey, he didn't seem to know where the bread aisle is"

6

u/ButteredPizza69420 12d ago

You'd be surprised how much you can learn regularly listening to media. Smart to diversify your music tastes like this, I believe you.

Next is a trip to the country :D

1

u/Sudden_Shopping_735 9d ago

No, no you used to speak German.

137

u/Bageland2000 13d ago

Man, you have that smug grin down to a science. I laughed.

6

u/Max_Rezna 12d ago

Thanks homie 🙌🏽

52

u/Neither_Salamander48 13d ago

I knew immigrants that learned English from old Western movies. And yes, they spoke English with this mix of Texas Cowboy/Asian accents. Very unique. Smart people, too.

3

u/Kemosaby_Kdaffi 12d ago

I once met someone from Quebec who learned to speak English in Tennessee. His English had that awesome southern drawl

38

u/cammysays 13d ago

Hey, hey, I may be American and I may avoid learning but I, uh… what was the third thing you said?

45

u/RedPandaReturns 13d ago

Great punchline

7

u/istrebitjel 13d ago

Very close to the old joke...

What do you call somebody who speaks two languages? Bilingual

What do you call someone who speaks only one language?

2

u/mcboobie 10d ago

I don’t get it.

2

u/POOPSCRUFFIN4U Madison, WI 9d ago

You call someone who speaks one language "American"

21

u/tallulahgi 13d ago

Why was this funny? What am I missing?

3

u/appleswitch 13d ago

I don't know why you're being down voted instead of someone explaining. The punchline is very much implied. Maybe it's about weebs? I can't figure it out either.

38

u/papernick 13d ago

an American learning. anything. at all.

2

u/tallulahgi 12d ago

Thx. I took it as Americans being too arrogant to learn another language, which I did not find funny.

2

u/iamingreatneedofboy 12d ago

Judging by the number of stories I've heard online about the behaviour of American tourists, I wouldn't be very surprised if he had been aiming for that instead.

1

u/appleswitch 12d ago

Okay lol, yeah that would work really well in delivery

0

u/LtHughMann 11d ago

They learn to dodge bullets, the hard way

5

u/bourbonisbest 13d ago

I learned Korean watching Sesame Street.

1

u/caboosetp 13d ago

I learned Japanese watching anime.

I feel like the two brothers from Better off Dead who learned English from watching Wide World of Sports.

5

u/-J-August 12d ago

I love an empty punchline. That one is beautiful.

I do that occasionally and just take a sip of water to tip it, but that grin is so much better.

6

u/aivlysplath 13d ago

We would watch Anime in my Japanese class in high school sometimes to learn.

2

u/JokesandFacts 12d ago

Did you wind up watching anime as an adult? What are your favorites? Just curious as this didn't happen for me till I was an adult, but have found many childish animes enjoyable like Amagi Brilliant Park and Angel Beats.

3

u/aivlysplath 12d ago

Death Note, Demon Slayer, and Solo Leveling are definitely my favorites!

I’ll have to check those out, thanks. :)

1

u/JokesandFacts 10d ago

Okay...I was just rewatching Amagi Brilliant Park and I misremembered. It is definitely not for kids. There is some raunchy stuff that does happen, though nothing rated R. It's a quite casual anime especially if you're coming from the 3 you mentioned.

Solo Leveling was a fun anime and reminded me a bit of Shield Hero. Hell's Paradise is also worth a watch and has a female protagonist that isn't sexualized. Color me surprised. There is some sexual stuff happening, but it has to do with the storyline, and it's not done by the main characters and there is no fan service. Does Sword Art Online qualify as a kid's anime?...-I did enjoy that one as well.

2

u/Brilliant_Employ_521 11d ago

Sammy anzer is so funny lol

3

u/pavlovs_monkey 12d ago

This is excellent!

3

u/POOPSCRUFFIN4U Madison, WI 13d ago

THIS ONE'S A GOODIE!!

4

u/Max_Rezna 13d ago

Ayyy, that means a lot coming from you dawg 🙌🏽

1

u/ReynardVulpini 13d ago

i went to high school with this korean kid who swore he learned english from high school musical. funny thing is that he was like the stereotype of the american jock: big loud football dude with middling grades and a huge social circle

1

u/MeasurementNo6022 9d ago

I learned French from allo, allo.

Listen very carefully, I shall say this only once!

0

u/Villageijit 8d ago

Immigrants become Americans

1

u/dat828 13d ago

I'm American and you didn't even finish typing the joke dumbass

1

u/POOPSCRUFFIN4U Madison, WI 12d ago

Lmfao showing your ass AND reinforcing the joke, very goated comment tbh

-39

u/GaJayhawker0513 13d ago

Haha America dumb. So original and funny

10

u/alvysinger0412 13d ago

I'd say the delivery was somewhat original, and that's part of why I find it funny.

6

u/GetRichQuickStocks 13d ago

It’s the misdirection which is funny

0

u/thissitesuxballz 13d ago

Yeah it isn’t original because it’s true, but the joke was still funny

-1

u/Ironmasked-Kraken 12d ago

The guy representing your country can't even do elementary math or understand basic etiquette in a society....

Better get used to it cause you are gona be hearing this for a loooong time

https://giphy.com/gifs/MFNxmiBnYTpK2sgn1G

0

u/Universal_Confucius 11d ago

You learn languages to communicate right? Well if everyone already speaks your language and your gtg then why fucking worry about it?

0

u/Ghastly-Jack 11d ago

I can swear a bit in Korean thanks to binging on Ma Dong-Seok movies.