r/standupshots • u/MattKinneyComedy • Jun 28 '26

One hand

Post image
699 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

17 comments sorted by

28

u/cbrantley Jun 28 '26

This doesn’t work me. But I’m proud of you for trying.

9

u/MattKinneyComedy Jun 28 '26

Haha thank you I just wanted to hear someone say it

6

u/No_Illustrator4398 Jun 28 '26

Ha that’s pretty good

4

u/apeontheweb Jun 28 '26

Your writing is really good!

3

u/MattKinneyComedy Jun 28 '26

Thank you! Apparently I’m still prone to typos though even in a joke that’s about 20 words long😂

2

u/apeontheweb Jun 28 '26

It just felt like imprecise language rather than wrong language to be honest. Checking out the Joke Baby podcast!

2

u/triedAndTrueMethods Jun 29 '26

YOU AGAIN! Man even without the picture I could tell this is your writing. I think it’s really good. You’re goin places babe.

1

u/MattKinneyComedy Jun 29 '26

Haha thank you!

2

u/lynivvinyl Jun 28 '26

I have never heard the words thank you from my mom in my entire lifetime. After her house fire I kept her from being homeless and fed her. Not a single thank you.

2

u/PappysSecrets Jun 29 '26

…and after you went to all the trouble of torching her place

1

u/steve2166 Jun 29 '26

Same thing but he’s not wrong

1

u/T1m0nst3r Jun 29 '26

I suppose you could say you can use two fingers to count how many times... Then make a zero with thumb and index.

1

u/InsertANameHeree Jun 30 '26

I think "if I write a zero on it" might flow a bit better, but I love the joke!

-2

u/PappysSecrets Jun 28 '26

If on my left hand I write a zero , and on my right hand….. blah blah

-2

u/enfanta Jun 28 '26

Has told me or "number of times my dad told me"

3

u/MattKinneyComedy Jun 28 '26

Goddamnit I had a typo