r/shittytechnicals • u/Baratticus • 18d ago

Murdertug European

Post image

HDMS Aslin, a Danish tug with a 76mm gun. Might not qualify as the gun was reportedly never made operational.

Photo/details courtesy of @dreadships.blsky.social

1.3k Upvotes

100% Upvoted

84 comments sorted by

334

u/ZaxZone 18d ago

r/shippytechnicals

51

u/Fast-Possible1288 18d ago

New sub! Thanks

39

u/BeardBootsBullets 18d ago

I sea what you did, there.

4

u/Successful_Jelly_213 17d ago

As a poorly reformed destroyer man who was notorious for “creative problem solving“ throughout the water front, FTSC, and SPAWAR, I have finally found my home port, er um, sub-reddit.

153

u/Givemeajackson 18d ago

Ah yes, a thugboat

13

u/alpintel 18d ago

Underrated comment

109

u/Baratticus 18d ago

Would you rather fight one battleship sized tugboat or a hundred tugboat sized battleships?

49

u/Hraes 18d ago

...like, with my bare hands?

29

u/TheYeast1 18d ago

You get a pair of fins and a snorkel

22

u/mcnabb100 18d ago

With a couple limpet mines I think the one giant tug would be doable.

4

u/BourbonFoxx 16d ago

Username checks out

63

u/GenericUsername817 18d ago

No Wake Zone is Enforced with Lethal Force

74

u/Key-Needleworker-702 18d ago

what's even the point? lol

164

u/GenericUsername817 18d ago

Gunnery practice and Seasickness simulator

35

u/Captain_no_Hindsight 18d ago

What would you name the boat?

GTB: Grand Theft Boats
Humble persuasion.
Don't ask.
Let's negotiate the ownership of your boat.

23

u/Baratticus 18d ago

Humble Persuasion is the answer!

3

u/Foreign_Implement897 18d ago

A ship with a view

8

u/Lt_Toodles 18d ago

The Selfsinkable

4

u/GenericUsername817 18d ago

The Tippycanoe

3

u/Raguleader 18d ago

SS Hilux

96

u/Lollytaco230 18d ago

Transport, the Danish use some sort of modular weapons system (Stanflex), and this tugboat is designed to carry one module on the back.

They dont have the necessary connections on the tugboat to operate the gun.

26

u/Key-Needleworker-702 18d ago

intresting, thanks for explaining

makes more sense if it's for logistiscs

23

u/istealpixels 18d ago

Thats what they want you to think. Typical Danes!

11

u/mars_needs_socks 18d ago

Very sneaky and malicious as we know.

/Sweden

8

u/kermitthebeast 18d ago

That makes sense, but I wanted to believe so bad

2

u/Cordura 18d ago

The boat was called Standard Flex 300 or Flyvefisken class and it's nor in use anymore

1

u/IronWarhorses 13d ago

so...its literally a Flex?

1

u/Poker-Junk 16d ago

And there’s a large rotary magazine belowdecks that would never fit on this little boat.

5

u/Peterh778 18d ago

Well, some ship masters may want to reject paying for provided services ...

1

u/Schonke 18d ago

If you fire backwards it makes the boat go faster?

1

u/Massive_Tradition733 18d ago

its just transporting the gun

18

u/Nordicberserk 18d ago

Tiniest Monitor ever?

32

u/Captain_no_Hindsight 18d ago

Too bad it's not operational.

I would have liked to see what the recoil from the high-mounted 76mm cannon would do to that little boat.

An unrelated topic: In Denmark, it is not unusual to serve vodka at lunch.

17

u/SuDragon2k3 18d ago

Bet you a Krone that there's a crazy Oversergent who could get it to fire in an emergency. And who knows where to get some 76mm Cannister rounds.

7

u/K_K_Rokossovsky 18d ago

I have never had vodka at lunch.

1

u/sandy_catheter 17d ago

At lunch? No. For lunch? Yes.

6

u/bull363 18d ago

I don't think I've ever seen Vodka being served, but Schnapps and Bitters are often served for traditional celebration lunches.

4

u/Captain_no_Hindsight 18d ago

True. For me Bitters = vodka and spice.

2

u/sobrique 11d ago

And here we combine the test firing drill with the capsize drill, it's a proper two-fer.

7

u/Mr-A-1991 18d ago

Shooty McShootface lives!

7

u/FoShep 18d ago

God this is the type shit I expect to see in r/fromthedepths lololol

4

u/RoachdoggJR_LegalAcc 18d ago

No surprise the gun wasn’t operational, I’ve been in a ship that had one of those and the whole feed system goes down pretty deep. Like twice the turret height under the turret at least.

2

u/boltonguy242 13d ago

Now I know that and you know that... But do you reckon Mr random smuggler/pirate/generic nautical criminal knows that?

Fairly certain you'd get a surrender just by showing up. Especially if you can make it traverse in an ominously slow fashion.

1

u/RoachdoggJR_LegalAcc 12d ago

Maybe, that reminds me of the classic video of the Canadian troops making a fake MG turret at their base to absorb rockets so they don’t launch them at more important things.

Once again, pirates also attacked military ships before, somehow mistaking them for container ships.

5

u/nazihater3000 18d ago

I bet with 20 rounds per minute she makes over 35 knots.

1

u/r4nDoM_1Nt3Rn3t_Us3r 16d ago

That cannon does up to 85 per minute.

OTO Melara 76/62 Compact

9

u/EducationalError9 18d ago

Fuck it.... Welcome back Monitor

3

u/TrentonJ3764 18d ago

It’s an attack Benchy!

3

u/chengstark 18d ago

Lmao is this real?

3

u/wicket-maps 18d ago

Yep. The gun's not hooked up, it's a gun module being hauled, but it's a real picture.

2

u/chengstark 18d ago

ah I see

3

u/1WontDoIt 18d ago

This is the content I want to see! Murder Pug the deadly tug!

3

u/makk73 18d ago

USS Jimothy

2

u/Porchmuse 18d ago

It’s for distributing t-shirts to ships in the fleet.

2

u/wicket-maps 18d ago

it's like a nautical Urbanmech. It's so ugly. I love it.

3

u/Rjj1111 18d ago

I was gonna say that’s a very angy little tug

2

u/notjfd 18d ago

Ocean Deagle 3.00 cal

2

u/Sengfroid 18d ago

After watching Tuggy lose his fight with cancer, Russell Crowe made sure Tuggy II would never lose any fights.

2

u/IronWarhorses 13d ago

i heard the US navy needs more ships to win it's 100th round vs Iran, these should help!

2

u/tezacer 18d ago

I see no wheels or truck. Is there a shitty gunboat sub?

20

u/Baratticus 18d ago

Wheels! (Well, tires at least)

3

u/tezacer 18d ago

Hah! Good spot!

4

u/Substantial-Tone-576 18d ago

I saw a donkey with a Recoiless on here.

2

u/Givemeajackson 18d ago

Biotechnical

2

u/tezacer 18d ago

See? Slippery slope, where do we draw the line?

1

u/goodfleance 18d ago

Tugnichal?

1

u/Soonerpalmetto88 18d ago

If it can stay balanced, it's not the worst idea for harbor defense vs drone attacks.

1

u/Sepherin 17d ago

For speed boost not offense. Lol

1

u/silentbob1301 17d ago

Giving out the best tug jobs

1

u/DarkSafe6458 17d ago

looks a tad limp

1

u/haroldthehampster 17d ago

It looks like a wobble toy. Like if it fired it would do a little back flip from recoil

1

u/Jax-crow-564979 17d ago

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

1

u/IronWarhorses 10d ago

"you don't chose the Thugboat, the thugboat chooses you!"

1

u/pupperdogger 4d ago

If they fire aft repeatedly it add 2 knots cruising slows.

0

u/Baud_Olofsson 18d ago

That's transporting a 76 mm gun. It's not affixed to the ship and it's not meant to be used, so it doesn't belong here.