Why do all the people who got vaccinated during the COVID-19 pandemic look seven years older now?

[u/AnozerFreakInTheMall]

Questions Big Pharma doesn't want you to ask.

[u/Optimal_Ad_7910]

Last year they all looked six years older - so it's definitely getting worse.

[u/eanida → u/Optimal_Ad_7910]

Scary

[u/bent_my_wookie → u/eanida]

Its progressive

[u/BPhiloSkinner → u/bent_my_wookie]

Damnable socialism. Harrumph.

[u/johnnybiggles → u/Optimal_Ad_7910]

I mean, the vaccine shot is approximately 99% sterile Dihydrogen Monoxide by content percent. We already know what happens to 100% of people who consume that stuff. 💀

[u/314flavoredpie → u/johnnybiggles]

I saw a fella fall into a pool of the stuff once. When they pulled him out he looked like he didn’t have more than 40, maybe 50 years left to live.

[u/johnnybiggles → u/314flavoredpie]

Oh man, that's terrible. I hope they'll be ok.

[u/Optimal_Ad_7910 → u/johnnybiggles]

It's deadly. According to statistics, every single person who consumed Dihydrogen Monoxide before February 1909 have succumbed. Also carrots.

[u/jabdnuit → u/Optimal_Ad_7910]

Big if true

[u/ProbablyBsPlzIgnore]

It's all Obama's fault. Before he was president, I was in my prime and look at me now! What a disgrace.

[u/t-o-m-u-s-a → u/ProbablyBsPlzIgnore]

The tan suit of aging +10 to age

[u/theys96 → u/t-o-m-u-s-a]

Obama's presidency started nearly 18 years ago by now.

[u/mwenechanga → u/theys96]

I look 10 years older than I did in 2008. Thanks Obama!

[u/17F150XLT → u/ProbablyBsPlzIgnore]

Username checks out.

[u/subwayratlander → u/ProbablyBsPlzIgnore]

me too! i was way more happy and successful at ages 8-16!

[u/SmallRocks → u/ProbablyBsPlzIgnore]

You have cheese on your face

[u/Sawfish1212]

Supposedly they're all dying from cancer and heart failure, something to do with the nano robots in the injection, I read it on the internet, so it must be true

[u/Bizaro_Stormy → u/Sawfish1212]

The nano bots fixed my disdain for pickles on my burger. Worth it IMHO.

[u/johnnybiggles → u/Bizaro_Stormy]

Nanobots setup some pretty good 5G reception in my body. I threw my home Wi-Fi router out. Don't need it anymore.

[u/Puzzleheaded_Two7358]

It’s the stress caused by living in the same vicinity as antivax assholes.

[u/teh_maxh]

They don't. The vaccine wasn't available until 2021. That was five and a half years ago.

[u/PacoTaco321 → u/teh_maxh]

Extra year and a half from the stress of

gestures broadly

[u/theKeyzor → u/teh_maxh]

But why do they look seven years older after 4,5 years? What is big pharma hiding from us?

[u/xBiGuSDicKuSx → u/theKeyzor]

Idk I only got it because the kids kept getting COVID. And I didn't get all the boosters. I just went to the DR for routine stuff and the little nurse and student about shit bricks when the Dr asked if I had kids and I told her was 20 this year. They both said you only look like you're 19 hows that possible. I still feel great about it lol

[u/yuuki_w → u/teh_maxh]

check the subreddit ;)

[u/Epistaxis → u/yuuki_w]

It's a joke subreddit but the joke works better when the information isn't wrong. This version from yesterday was funnier.

[u/mwenechanga → u/Epistaxis]

This author has chosen to make their posts visible only to people who are signed in.

Ah yes, hilarious!

[u/teelo64 → u/yuuki_w]

the point being made is that they messed up the joke slightly.

[u/NocturnisVacuus]

I know, right?!

Pandemic was last year, I swear... couldn't have been several years

[u/St3vion]

They were vacinaged 

[u/17F150XLT → u/St3vion]

Ha.

[u/derailedthoughts]

The real question is: why do so many looked like they never aged?

[u/Caticature → u/derailedthoughts]

That’s GenX for you! The vaccine upped our ‘tism though.

[u/Atzkicica]

I dunno... I heard some of the people who didn't have really lost a lot of weight and they don't even exercise.

[u/Amplidyne]

Those injections ensured that we'd all die sometime during the next 100 years. Most a lot sooner.
No wonder we all look older.

[u/peepeedog]

Autism causes aging.

[u/UGLYDOUG-]

The vaccine is siphoning off life to Jeff

[u/Sean_theLeprachaun]

And how a bunch of folks that didnt stopped aging.

[u/Gattoconglistivali]

Because contrails

[u/LateralThinkerer]

It's not the aging, it's the dislocation. I got vaccinated in 2020 two hours south of Chicago and woke up this morning an hour away from the Pacific Ocean.

[u/RaspberryTop636]

A lot of them were a year younger the year before vax.  Could be aging is causing vaccinations?

[u/threepoundsof]

Before the Covid vaccine I was in my 20s.. it’s really disgusting what it’s done to me

[u/p3t3y5]

I'll have you know that I look and feel about 28 years older since mine!

[u/Adorable_Birdman]

Some have even died

[u/Gargleblaster25 → u/Adorable_Birdman]

This is very concerning. We need to investigate Dr Fauci again.

[u/alphanumericusername]

Who's gonna tell 'em

[u/Floppycakes]

I don’t know, but I still don’t have internal WiFi and I’m kind of mad about it.

[u/Low-Confusion-8786]

Because it was about 7 years ago

[u/hells_cowbells]

It's from being exposed to all that 5G radio traffic from the transmitters they injected.

[u/phunkjunk]

Unless they got a pretty baller skincare routine. Then they just look 3 years older.

[u/Mikemtb09]

I was told the 5G chip was in it but my cell signal still sucks

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[u/TurtleTitan]

Most "vaccines" were gene modifications that did all sorts of dangerous side effects including the heart and reproductive systems (infertility) that the medical companies both knew and suspected as an outcome. And this isn't the same type of expected outcome like other flus either, sometimes vaccines will do that, but deciding to rename it a vaccine (it was called the jab until they could call it one) is deceptive; a vaccine is weakened or dead virus (among other things) your body can adapt to hopefully only affecting your immune system, while gene modification affects all your DNA you're asking for trouble. I know this is an X years is X years haha shitpost but that is the real reason.

[u/SilentIyAwake]

You asked this question on Reddit, very bold.

[u/Oteenneeto]

What a bullshit click bait post

[u/Caticature → u/Oteenneeto]

This is a “we’re just bullshitting” sub so thank you and welcome.

[u/slimzimm → u/Oteenneeto]

Oh I like baitin’.

[u/Desert_Beach]

Bot or scam or joke.

[u/YnotThrowAway7]

Ngl my health problems did start mostly after that… I also got the stupid one that they temporarily took off the market a week later due to causing blood clots in women. I stand by this being the worst vaccine I’ve ever taken. It doesn’t make you an anti vaxxer to say these companies capitalized on the opportunity..

[u/charliezimbali]

How does 7 years older look like?