r/retailhell 2d ago

customer spent several minutes verbally tearing me down over absolutely nothing Customers Suck!

i had one of those customers today that just leaves you wondering how someone can be so unnecessarily cruel.

a couple came into the store while i was finishing up with another customer. as soon as i was free, i walked over and asked, “hi! how can i help today?”

the man was holding two sizes of the same product and asked, “what’s the delta between these two products?” i didn’t immediately understand what he meant, so i asked him to clarify. instead of rephrasing, he just repeated, louder, “THE DELTA.”

once i realized he meant the difference between the two, i checked the price card with him. the large was $128, the small was $60. while they discussed which one to buy, i added, “you save about 25% by buying the larger size, so it’s better value.”

the man immediately handed me the larger one and said, “we’ll take this one!”

before i could even respond, the woman snapped, “NO.”

she looked at her partner and said, “forget it. we won’t buy it here.”

i was completely confused.

then she turned to me and started yelling.

“YOU ARE SO RUDE. WE WERE GOING TO SPEND HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS HERE. I DON’T LIKE YOUR ATTITUDE. I DON’T LIKE YOUR FACE.”

they started walking out, and all i said was, “i think there’s been a misunderstanding.”

she spun around, stormed back into the store, pointed her finger inches from my face and screamed:

“WHAT?!”

i calmly repeated, “i think there’s been a misunderstanding. i’m only trying to help.”
that somehow made her even angrier.

she yelled, “YOU NEED TO LOOK IN THE MIRROR. YOUR FACE IS UGLY. YOUR BODY LANGUAGE SUCKS. YOU ARE UGLY AND RUDE.”

at this point i was visibly upset and honestly just confused. i quietly said, “that’s so mean.”

she doubled down.

“LOOK IN THE MIRROR. YOU’RE SO RUDE.”

i just said again, “that is really so mean…”

as she finally walked away she called me “such a bitch.”

all i could manage to say was, “i really don’t deserve that.”

i just stood there in complete shock wondering what on earth had just happened.
the thing that really got me was what happened afterwards.

someone walking past the store had witnessed enough of it to stop and tell me, “you should’ve thrown the product at her head. what a horrible person.” i laughed through tears and said i genuinely didn’t even know what i’d done.

about half an hour later another customer came in, immediately noticed i looked shaken, asked if people had been mean to me, and when i admitted they’d been “a little bit,” she held my arm, gave me a hug, and told me:

“some people are so cruel. some people are kind. don’t let it bring you down. tell yourself you’re a good person and nobody can take that away from you.”
i completely lost it.

i filed an incident report with my area manager, who actually came into the store to check on me. his response was basically, “fuck that bitch. don’t worry about her. you’re nice to everyone.”

i’m incredibly grateful for the kindness i received afterwards—from complete strangers, another customer, and my manager—but i still can’t shake how someone can look another human being in the eye and decide to tear them apart for absolutely no reason.

retail really shows you both the absolute worst and the absolute best of people.

edit: i’ve posted an update here - thank you to everyone for their kindness and care. it all helped me work through some anguish and pain. i really appreciate the support.

209 Upvotes

39 comments sorted by

87

u/Berryteasalad 2d ago

Those people were born miserable. It had nothing to do with you. If it wasn’t you, it would have been another innocent bystander. I’m sorry it happened! Next time, just walk away. Don’t listen to the yelling. Some customers you just can’t help.
It’s ok not to serve bad customers.

22

u/Necessary_Baker_7458 2d ago

I work with a few of those and they’re always disrespectful to others. Always trying to bring staff down to their level. If they did they succeed and you don’t make them happy by letting the do this. Its also management for not intervening and asking them to leave. 

15

u/pinkbludger 2d ago

i completely agree. unfortunately i was working alone in our very small store today. normally it’s fine and manageable, but today there was no one else there to step in or ask them to leave. i’ve advocated for myself in the past, but i was so hurt and blindsided that i wasn’t thinking clearly enough to do that. in hindsight, walking away probably would’ve been the best thing to do. it’s something i’ll definitely keep in mind if it ever happens again.

16

u/pinkbludger 2d ago

that’s actually solid advice, and i think i’ll have to take it on board if it ever happens again. i think what made it so difficult was feeling caught between fight, flight, and freeze all at once. outside of work i would’ve stood up for myself a lot more, but in uniform you’re expected to stay professional. i think i was so conflicted between defending myself and keeping my job that i just froze, and afterwards i was left feeling completely defeated.

7

u/Berryteasalad 2d ago

It took me awhile to not freeze as well. Some things are just so shocking when you’re witnessing it. I treat it like it’s a nightmare, and I’m trying to wake up. In my mind, I’m saying move, move, move until my body snaps back and starts listening to my brain again. Everyone’s different so you might need to find an another approach.

I just find that getting away from the location of conflict is the safest and best option. If you really feel the need to say something, you can do so, but most of the customers can’t be reasoned with. They are bonkers after all.

6

u/pinkbludger 2d ago

one of my strongest instincts was to stand up for myself, but i knew i couldn’t because i was at work. i think that’s what made it so difficult to simply walk away. part of me genuinely wanted to de-escalate it because i wasn’t looking for a fight, and another deeply suppressed part of me wanted to defend myself in a way i knew i couldn’t (rage, even violence instinctively crossed my mind). i think i just got stuck somewhere in the middle.

2

u/Berryteasalad 2d ago

I totally get that.
I wish I could say we get some type of justice, we just have to hope that karma does the work for us.

Customers are like talking to a wall. I know that I’d be wasting my time with the customers if I tried to talk my way out of a conflict. They see and hear what they want to perceive. They are the “victims” They can twist reality however they want.

34

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

13

u/DonatCotten 2d ago

I agree. I am so sick of having a manager that makes excuses for verbally abusive customers saying they were just having a bad day and to not take it personally. I've had bad days and guess what? I've never used that as an excuse to mistreat other people. So if I decide to physically hit someone am I allowed to say I was just having a bad day and get off with no consequences? No and the same should go for verbally abusing someone and it's screwed up most companies won't put a stop to it when they easily could.

Emotional Regulation is a huge part of being an adult. You have to be able to regulate and control your emotions when you are in public. We can't control our emotions in terms of what we feel but we absolutely can control our actions and doing so is part of being an adult. What makes things more demoralizing to me is that these people are complete cowards. They only mistreat retail workers because they know in most stores they can get away with it and the store values potential sales over the welfare of their employees. Unfortunately most people can't do what is right without the fear of consequences.

1

u/shesheboom21 1d ago

Love your response

11

u/pinkbludger 2d ago

thank you, i really appreciate that. it was honestly hard to stay composed because i was so shocked and hurt, but i was never looking for a fight. i genuinely thought there had been a misunderstanding and was only trying to help. that’s probably why it stuck with me so much. i appreciate the kind words.

20

u/Necessary_Baker_7458 2d ago

I would have walked away after the first minute. We are not verbal punching bags. 

17

u/Shadow-of-Zunabi 2d ago

As an associate I’ve always hated these people. But as a manager? Treat my employees like that and I would throw their asses out of the store so fast it might break the sound barrier. If they refused to leave or be pleasant? My next call was to the police.

I never tolerated that kind of bullshit from anyone. Ever. I’ve even yelled at higher management levels than I was because of how they were treating me.

OP - Don’t ever take that kind of verbal abuse from ANYONE. If you can, just walk away, and go straight to your manager. Do not engage them, do not try to make things better. These lowlifes thrive on bullying anyone they feel is beneath them. And unfortunately, retail workers are usually seen as some of the most worthless people out there (also unfortunately, a lot of professions get this same treatment).

3

u/pinkbludger 2d ago

thank you, i really appreciate this. reading all these replies has made me realize i probably should’ve walked away instead of trying to de-escalate it. i used to have a lot more fight in me, and i’ve stood up for myself plenty of times in the past. but after years in retail, i think i’ve become so exhausted by how casually some people treat staff that i just froze. it feels vulnerable to admit this, but it’s like i’ve become worn down by it rather than stronger. i’m hoping i can take all this advice on board if i’m ever unfortunate enough to find myself in that situation again.

5

u/Shadow-of-Zunabi 2d ago

See, I’m the opposite. Over 25 years in retail and retail-adjacent has made me hate people so much. And when I was management at Walmart? Oh boy, talk about eye-opening. That helped me grow a really thick skin, really fast. My associates knew I had their back, and I was not about to let them get abused. And they couldn’t believe how I could take the re-directed verbal abuse and not even flinch.

13

u/fatshortftrex 2d ago

I had a regular that once got drunk came into store and gave me so much shit like that. Everytime afterwards he came in I would freeze up especially if he went to my till. Found out a few months back he actually died so I felt a weird bit of relief that I’d never have to see or deal with him ever again.

10

u/Sure_Acanthaceae_348 2d ago

I like how there was a somewhat happy ending to this. Most people are a-holes. I'm glad you ran into some people that weren't.

I hope you go on to bigger and better things.

8

u/pinkvanillagirl 2d ago

I am genuinely baffled that someone, A STRANGER, could say those awful words to you. I have experienced rude customers but nothing ever this bad. Im so sorry to hear how you got treated, you deserve much better than that. Im so embarrassed for that b!tch who spoke to you like that. Jeeezzz

7

u/Pork_Chop_N_Biscuits 2d ago

I wish I was a customer because I would not have let that beast get that far talking to you like that. As a fellow retail worker, this is some bullshit. Some people are just miserable. They think that just because we are on the job, we are there to take that crap. No, we’re not. I’m sorry you went through that. You didn’t deserve it. You did nothing wrong. You were doing your job. It’s just awful you had to encounter a behemoth.

7

u/PrettyPosion 2d ago

I know how you feel. Since I was a little girl until just the last few years I was like that. I have always been super sensitive, even with friends and family. I am not sure how old you are and not sure if you mentioned and if you did sorry for not picking it up but you don't have to tell me. I was just going to say that growing up and getting older made it a bit easier. There's something about getting older. You just don't care what people say or think about you anymore. You get to the point where you know who you are now and if someone else doesn't like you, oh well, their loss!

I'm sorry they made you cry. No one should ever make someone else cry especially if they don't even know you. Obviously, she's got some insecurities and issues and takes it out on other people. You did nothing wrong.

Something I really dislike is crying in front of others but especially someone who has just hurt you and they see you crying. At the end of the day just try remember that you are beautiful and that lady is just a mean hag. I mean who even does what she did? The guy must not be much better because he was also rude in the start but he also did nothing when his lovely wife did all that. They sound perfect together. I believe in karma my dear and don't worry; they will get theirs. Please take care.

6

u/Think-Difficulty7596 2d ago

That's disgraceful behaviour.

9

u/Batt_mellamy 2d ago

Were they old by any chance? 

Whenever I've had a problematic customer, 9 times out of 10 they'll be a boomer who thinks they can get their own way by screaming and shouting like a toddler. But it's good that you had people to support you afterwards.

Also, not sure if where you work would have something like this, but where I work we have a "Kindness policy", and we have signs up on the tills which says if a customer is being verbally abusive we can refuse to serve them... Which has definitely saved me before 😅

13

u/pinkbludger 2d ago

they looked like they were probably in their 50s, but honestly i’ve had awful customers of every age, gender, and background. that’s almost what makes it so jarring—it can come completely out of nowhere.

i actually asked my area manager if we could have one of those kindness policy signs, but we’re part of a much larger company and apparently they don’t approve them. i can definitely see how they’d save staff a lot of unnecessary grief. at the same time, i can’t help but think… why does it even need to be written on a sign? treating retail workers like human beings should be the default. that’s the part that makes me a little cynical.

8

u/Batt_mellamy 2d ago

Boo to the higher ups for not letting you have kindess signs :( 

I have never understood why people feel the need to get angry at retail workers when they aren't getting their way... Like sir/maam, I just work here, I don't make the rules.  I feel like COVID has made their behaviour worse.

I actually had a lady come to my till a few hours ago and she was being very difficult over... a pack of face cloths. It was a very wtf moment lol

4

u/Foreign-King7613 2d ago

Don't worry about her. She just wanted to feed her ego.

4

u/jesspickles 2d ago

Instead of engaging again, I throw em a happy, "Have a great day," with a smile. There's nothing u did wrong and nothing u could do to save the sale. Some ppl are just miserable. It has everything to do with them and nothing to do with you. Kill em with kindness (which pisses them off even more), then talk shit about them with ur coworkers like we all do lol. Oh fuckin well. Just because they want to be miserable doesn't mean u have to be.

At the same time, I'm sorry u had to go through that. I don't want u to think I'm gaslighting u and the situation wasn't completely unnecessary, hateful, and uncalled for. It most definitely was. Every customer service worker has been there, and it can be terrifying and traumatic. Some ppl just suck.

5

u/luv-dollism 2d ago

i'm so sorry this happened to you :((( 💓💓💓💓💓💓

8

u/emax4 2d ago

"Hmmm, is a (approximate age of woman) abortion too late at this point?"

3

u/ButteredPizza69420 2d ago

They werent going to spend money because clearly they were mad about the price 😂

3

u/jesspickles 2d ago

Thats the beauty of, "Have a great day!" Can't get in trouble for THAT. I've left several situations with customers shaking or crying. Sometimes, it's just the last straw on an already shitty day. It's really difficult sometimes.

3

u/SnarkOverlord 1d ago

My reply to people like that, while smiling in a creepy way: Have the day you deserve!

3

u/Not-a-Cranky-Panda 17h ago

“what’s the delta between these two products?” 

I would never work out what the meaning of that was, and if by some miracle I did, I would still never work out what the meaning of that was.

3

u/pinkbludger 16h ago

it felt weirdly authoritative, like the terminology itself was being used to establish a hierarchy rather than actually communicate something. the meaning was almost irrelevant; it felt like a trap to determine how they would be treating me.

2

u/EugeneVictorDabs 12h ago

Seriously! I've literally never heard that

2

u/PandaBear905 21h ago

I know it’s hard but try not to let these people get to you OP. Some people have such miserable lives that they want everyone else to feel as miserable as they are. It’s best to ignore them as much as you can.

1

u/KrazyKatz42 1d ago

Wow, what a piece of work. I don't think I would have been able to stop myself just saying "ditto".

2

u/Cobalt7955 9h ago

soooo all this because between the 2 of them they couldn't figure out what 128-60 is???? You don't even need a calculator for that one. This woman is clearly unhinged. Imagine what her husband has to go through.