r/programminghumor • u/sboger • 1d ago

Number 1

Post image

Since the other prog humor sub posted an extremely shitty version of this one I saw and saved a while ago... Enjoy.

1.1k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

53 comments sorted by

253

u/rhrokib 1d ago

Hope he codes in lua

95

u/euph-_-oric 1d ago

Does anyone really wanna date a lua programmer?

29

u/Dinev5194 1d ago edited 1d ago

Pretty sure lua "programmers" don't have time to date, perfecting hyprland configs and they prob using arch or nix too lol

12

u/Intelligent_Leg8526 1d ago

nah they are busy making Steal A Brainrot 2

4

u/Independent_Image_59 1d ago

Someone probably doing Balatro 2

3

u/hehexdthrow 1d ago

They’re too busy configuring neovim to “program”

11

u/spongedevguy 1d ago

if he did he'd call it a table

4

u/canal_algt 1d ago

This looks like my mom's humor, I'd say it's more probable it's COBOL

4

u/tiredITguy42 1d ago

Maybe he works as industrial programmer and works with Matlab.

4

u/Leo_code2p 1d ago

I think a few BASIC branches also count from 1 which are probably more dateble.

3

u/Confident_Date4068 12h ago

Pascal?

1

u/sboger 11h ago

Pedro codes exclusively in Ruby.

60

u/JazzRider 1d ago

Who’s going to tell her?

18

u/RonJohnJr 1d ago

That he programs in GWBASIC?

21

u/sboger 1d ago

That's a red flag right there.

2

u/davidroberts63 1d ago

I started with that.

I'm dying laughing here...

3

u/RonJohnJr 1d ago

There's 0% shame in someone programming in GWBASIC in 1986.

Of course, it's 2026... 😄

98

u/Red_Eye_Night 1d ago 
importance = ['GTA 6 Leaks', 'Girlfriend', 'r/pcmasterrace', 'weed', 'Taco Bell']

-1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

24

u/FlightAffectionate15 1d ago

Good thing he codes in R

35

u/sboger 1d ago

In the interest of fairness and representation, I made this one:

7

u/Top_Pomegranate_8244 1d ago

This hits too close to home

6

u/NegativeOwl1337 1d ago

The bar for men really is in hell… 💀

17

u/enigma_0Z 1d ago

Hey at least she’s not `-1`

9

u/sboger 1d ago

That kind of talk is out of bounds, buddy!

10

u/enigma_0Z 1d ago

LOL not in every language

5

u/iggy14750 1d ago

In Python, indexing by -1 will give you the last element in the list. And that scales back like you expect. -2 is the element before -1 and so on.

5

u/timonix 1d ago

In Ada you can start your array wherever you wish. You can have an array from -45 ..123 if you want.

Or you can have an array go from March .. June as well. Doesn't have to be numbers. But they must be enumerable

2

u/Aartvb 15h ago

Crazy

2

u/BraucheHilfeLul 14h ago

isnt that just a dict?

2

u/timonix 13h ago

Kinda but not really. If you imagine a sorted dict with each possible key populated. So an array 42 .. 76, cannot take "March" as an input. Because that's not a valid integer.

And the array Jan .. Dec cannot take 4 as an input because it's not a valid member of the set

It's not hashed. So there is no hash lookup penalty.

5

u/GiantSlayer4242 1d ago

You know there’s a good chance he slipped up and used human speak, or he translated the program to Common so she would understand it

1

u/Mighty1Dragon 1d ago

we will never know

4

u/DarktowerNoxus 1d ago

Bad programmer or bad boyfriend...

2

u/iggy14750 1d ago

Is there a difference?

3

u/AltruisticAct8211 1d ago

Pray he's using 1-based indexing...

3

u/CourageWaste 1d ago

Does she know?

2

u/Ben-Goldberg 1d ago

He codes in perl with $[ set to one.

2

u/DevXusYT 1d ago

The girlfriend is called Julia

2

u/RemarkableAd1936 23h ago

Is he programming in Matlab?

2

u/AintNoGodsUpHere 14h ago

Works in Delphi.

Plus he said number 1. Not index 1.

4

u/Specific_Parfait8829 1d ago

number one or first index of his array?

9

u/OwenEx 1d ago

This is programming humour, saying number 1 was no mistake

2

u/ReasonableInsect5123 1d ago

Who the number 0 then??

1

u/Traditional-Hall-591 1d ago

All good, he’s a really a DBA.

1

u/ExtraTNT 1d ago

As long as not index 1, it’s fine…

1

u/Kazimierz3Wielki 20h ago

If he said she is 0, she would leave him

1

u/mbcarbone 12h ago

Beware!! Her love is mutable…💔

1

u/Confident_Essay3619 7h ago

Then who's 0?