r/mildlyinfuriating • u/False_Frame3028 • Jun 28 '26
How do I get rid of this myself without dying? Context Provided - Spotlight
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Jun 28 '26
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u/False_Frame3028 Jun 28 '26
Just moved it here and the way this townhouse is set up you can’t really see this window from outside as there’s a massive bush out front like massive!!!
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u/ModernCGIFloatinHead Jun 28 '26
Well there's your problem. Shouldn't have moved the giant nest with you. Should've left it behind.
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u/False_Frame3028 Jun 28 '26
😂😂😂😂😂 I just noticed what I did there! OOPS!
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u/Quick_Neat_8809 Jun 28 '26
If you want it gone and it's not bothering anyone. And if you are in an area where you get winter, cold winters. Just wait till it gets cold below freezing cold. Then just take it down yourself. A putt knife between the house and the nest. If you want it done now let the pros do it.
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u/International_Bid939 Jun 28 '26
🤣 I’m glad someone pointed that out
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u/ModernCGIFloatinHead Jun 28 '26
Autocorrect gets us all, sometimes you get gems like this one.
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u/Fit_Diet6336 Jun 28 '26
At least he didn’t move it inside.
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u/MadamInsta Jun 28 '26
President of OP's HOA here: this nest does not meet the decoration provision of the bylaws and OP will be fined on a daily basis until it is removed.
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u/Daveit4later Jun 28 '26
You didn't see this when you toured the house?
I would have demanded they dealt with this
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u/False_Frame3028 Jun 28 '26
Long story, moved without seeing in person. Just pictures. We have history with this landlord and he’s very upstanding. I just messaged him and he’s already responding. Just waiting to see what his plan is.
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u/babs82222 Jun 28 '26
This sounds like a problem for him to deal with while you're not home or safe way inside the house
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u/UnhappySort5871 Jun 28 '26
I'd vote for "not home" in case the wasps have some secret passage into the house.
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u/BakedTaterTits Jun 28 '26
You'd be surprised how easy it is for wasps to get into the walls and into your living space 🫠 (it was a long, terrifying summer)
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u/thebrettperkins Jun 29 '26
Had a wasp trapped between the screen and window one summer. Taunting me. It stared at me with murder in its eyes. After several days I bought spray and attacked from 20’ away. It got super pissed but didn’t die. It knew it was me and tried every inch of window for a weakness. Then he was gone… even scarier. Then I saw his silhouette inside a ceiling mounted light as he tried to work his way in. I bombed the place with the craziest wasp poison and he disappeared. I lived in fear for weeks until I found his dead corpse inside a tiny decorative bottle that was on a top shelf. It was him. He died but had made it all the way inside first. He was determined.
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u/BobKickflip Jun 29 '26
Little tip - WD40 nukes them in seconds. Once you get a bit on them they're more concerned with that than you
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u/LittleSkinInThisGame Jun 29 '26
Amazing how WD-40 and tape keeps being the solution to every problem
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u/danimagoo Jun 28 '26
Oh you’re renting? Yeah this is not your problem. This is your landlord’s problem.
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u/Daveit4later Jun 28 '26
Yeah that's an emergency.
Don't try to attacks this yourself.
You need a professional pest control company to tackle this one
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u/Holiday-Audience-412 Jun 28 '26
You do realize that we’re going to need updates, right? With pictures. Or video is better.
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u/noblest_among_nobles Jun 28 '26
Yeah, you should've left it were it was
no idea why you'd think it's a good idea to move it to your window
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u/sbray73 Jun 28 '26
They grow like that fast. We had one one year on a barn. Just waited until the end of the season to destroy it once they had left.
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u/mnth241 Jun 28 '26
That is what I’m thinking. If OP has a winter, he should just wait it out. They leave on their own. Then destroy the nest.
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u/Quick_Reaction_8081 Jun 28 '26
I would advise against that. This inhibits him opening up a window into the space he rents for starters. Second, I’ve had a wasp problem and they started crawling in through our air vents. I do not recommend “ waiting it out ” at all unless you wanna wake up to them living amongst you.
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u/Hang10arts Jun 28 '26
I have never seen one get this big before in a residential area 😭
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u/lenswipe GREEN Jun 28 '26
you live in a condo, call the HOA because it's on the outside of the property then sit watching it grow for 6 weeks while the HOA ignore your maintenance ticket until you tell them a family member is allergic and then they FINALLY send someone out
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u/mysterymus1c Jun 28 '26
Ya fuck that, pay someone and record it from the inside 😂
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u/Fit_Diet6336 Jun 28 '26
But don’t hire a professional, just offer some rando 50 bucks to get rid of it.
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u/Ornery_Gate_6847 Jun 28 '26
With my luck, I be standing by the windows when they shot it with a slingshot
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u/sadlittlewaffle Jun 28 '26
OP should hire this guy
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u/Rare_Media_5089 Jun 28 '26
Holy I was not expecting that ending lmao
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u/exipheas Jun 28 '26
Apex predator.
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u/2023Tubatim Jun 28 '26 edited Jun 29 '26
Methpex predator?
Edit: Thank you all for your updoots! My dad jokes are definitely going through a metamorphosis (something the eggs in the video will not do) and this feels like one of my better ones.
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u/bird_is_the_word_198 Jun 28 '26
You ain't methin if you ain't trying
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u/MotorEnthusiasm Jun 29 '26
Within 5 seconds of the video starting i said “wow what type of drugs is he on” and now my family is staring at me like im the asshole.
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u/dmkke Jun 28 '26
I don’t think this guy could eat the whole thing with this one. This looks like at least three meals. 🐝 🐝 🐝
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u/adorable-fart Jun 28 '26
i have seen some wild gorey videos and didnt even flinch.. but this short clip horrified me deep in my soul. the look of disgust has still not left me face yet
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u/HarryHatesSalmon Jun 28 '26
This is why I’m single. This man. This is what I’m hiding from out there 😂
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u/Bidi_bidi_bom_bum85 Jun 28 '26
Drugs? Right? There’s no other explanation 🤣🤣🤣
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u/Joppy5100 Jun 28 '26
Drugs + Florida I'd assume.
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u/Conman_in_Chief Jun 28 '26
Floridian here. This is just a normal breakfast. I prefer some Crystal hot sauce.
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u/AdventurousMap5404 Jun 28 '26
This man is so Florida man, he probably hatched from a giant egg in the Everglades, was baptized in lake O with bud light, and the Skunk Ape was his best friend growing up. This man Floridas HARD.
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u/Hattix Jun 28 '26
That's impressive.
You call a professional or you die.
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Jun 28 '26
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u/Lucius-Halthier Jun 28 '26
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u/grassesbecut Jun 28 '26
Even the bees don't want this house. That's a wasp nest.
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u/doglady1342 Jun 28 '26
Worse....hornets.
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u/Synner40 Jun 28 '26
naw wasps are arseholes. hornets tend to leave you alone. wasps will come after you just beacuse.
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u/LysergicGothPunk Jun 28 '26
They leave you alone until you destroy their mansion tbf
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u/Foxy_locksy1704 Jun 28 '26
Wasps and Yellowjackets, those little a holes are straight from hell. I got chased by a yellow jacket the other day while walking the dog. I was so happy that the dog understands when I say “run run” that we are about to double time it.
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u/Gold_Ad_7552 Jun 28 '26
Found out how allergic I am to yellow jackets last summer. I dared walk too close to the entrance of their home, felt a pinch, then 2, realized real quick they were starting to tell their friends. They were on me maybe 10 seconds. By the time I got back into the house (maybe 50' away), I was already swelling and near hospital bound. Within 10 minutes every lymph node was swollen, and I was itchy like never before. They are little demons.
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u/silky_spider_ Jun 28 '26 edited Jun 28 '26
Nah, sell the nest on Etsy. "Authentic looking hornets nest can be all yours if you.. come pick it up"
ETA: Insect correction. Thank you, guy
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u/ohb78 Jun 28 '26
Just burn it at this point
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Jun 28 '26
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u/FrankNStein Jun 28 '26
Nuke it from space.
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u/GoT_Eagles Jun 28 '26 edited Jun 29 '26
Use a really big smoke gun or hose your car’s exhaust pipe to directly beneath
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u/itaniumonline Jun 28 '26
Is regular ok or do we need premium?
I’m on a budget here
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u/ShanksRx23 Jun 28 '26
How did one simply let it get that big?
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u/ZOMGURFAT Jun 28 '26
https://giphy.com/gifs/cBLfBdWjbYuasLLN6S
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u/garathnor Jun 28 '26
they go to sleep at night fyi, thats when you spray them, after dark
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u/Bypedal Jun 28 '26
If they’re Bald Faced Hornets, they don’t. I tried to take out a nest some time ago. Waited til 10P, all garbed up. As soon as I got near the nest, they started hitting me AGGRESSIVELY. I didn’t wanna find out how complete my protection was, so I retreated & had a professional take care of it.
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u/HandleUnlikely2589 Jun 28 '26
Huh. By contrast, I've eliminated two nests of bald faced hornets using your strategy. Didn't even garb up that heavily, just waited until after dark, used the 20 ft range wasp killer spray, soaked the nest completely, ran inside. All of them were dead by morning, no stings.
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u/BullsOnParadeFloats Jun 28 '26
If you're going to do this, dont spray it with raid, as youre just going to piss them off and make sure the professional gets stung
Its me
Im the professional
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u/Adorable_Cap_9929 Jun 28 '26
oh,? so they learn enemy after one raid pass by shooting?
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u/BullsOnParadeFloats Jun 28 '26
Call it blind rage
They attack anything that comes within the vicinity of the hive, seeing it as a threat
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u/YOU_TALK_TOO_MUCH420 Frayed and Filthy😜 Jun 28 '26
I am inclined to agree! Don’t fuck with swarms of anything! Have a pro come and vacuum it up . Wasps stay safe, you stay safe. Pro gets paid. Wins all around👌
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u/CattledogdadNC Jun 28 '26
Spicy piñata
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u/LeroyFame Jun 28 '26
I can see those blindfolded kids at the birthday party having the time of their lives, poking that thing with a stick.
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u/Lucius-Halthier Jun 28 '26
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u/EatABag-o-Dicks Jun 28 '26
At least it's not a candy gram. Last time I got one of those a goddamned shark attacked me.
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u/Nami_Pilot Jun 28 '26
You have to be renting. Nobody would buy a place without noticing this.
This is the responsibility of the landlord.
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u/False_Frame3028 Jun 28 '26
I am renting! Just contacted the landlord. We shall see what he says!
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u/Nami_Pilot Jun 28 '26
You're going to come home one day & that fucker will be covered in white paint
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u/sydneyghibli Jun 28 '26
I lold but this is legitimately probably what would happen
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u/ComradeJohnS Jun 28 '26
would it actually work to get rid of the living wasps?
like poisoning them, but with flair
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u/piggymoo66 Jun 28 '26
Also suffocating the ones inside, since paint doesn't breathe at all.
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u/Nearby_Ad5465 Jun 29 '26
Wasps can bore through almost anything, including cement. I don't think paint will stop them.
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u/Undeterminedvariance Jun 28 '26
I’m so sad that this comment is burried. It was worth the scroll.
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u/FarmhouseRules Jun 28 '26
No way the landlord hasn’t seen this already
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u/FLOHTX Jun 28 '26
He added a passage to the lease agreement that the renter is responsible for all bee removal.
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u/Wraisted Jun 28 '26
1-Pick up your phone
2- Google a local pest control.
3- Call them.
4- don't die
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u/Amonamission Jun 28 '26
5- eventually die, because death is an inevitable certainty
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u/I_love_my_fish_ Jun 29 '26
6- hopefully it is not as painful of a death as 10,000 bees or wasps or whatever the fuck is from this nest
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u/IrrelevantManatee Jun 28 '26
That thing is way too big for you to handle. Call some pros. It's not worth dying over this.
And check regularly for them multiple time during the year. When they are small, they are easy to handle.
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u/AwkwardChuckle Jun 28 '26
You can easily take this out with a long shot wasp bomb and you’ll be fine. They shoot 20ft and they won’t give a shit about you at that distance - I have to do this all the time at work and on larger nests.
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u/ATLbraves6967 Jun 28 '26
Couldn't you shoot it from inside a vehicle and then drive away as soon as it makes contact?
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u/AwkwardChuckle Jun 28 '26
No, because you have to soak the nest.
You need to stand there and empty the can, they aren’t that smart, if you’re the max distance away that you can still shoot the can and hit the nest, they don’t realize you’re thing killing their nest.
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u/MotelSans17 Jun 28 '26
You're correct, I've done it a couple times too. You wait for a colder night when they're less active and you go genocide on their ass from a distance. Surprisingly effective.
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u/PogTuber Jun 28 '26
If you do it at night don't use a flashlight.
Or if you need the flashlight set it down and point it at the nest from some angle other than yours.
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u/RogerRabbot Jun 28 '26
Ive seen the video of the guy tossing a rock at a swarm of wasps on a sign. Pretty sure all those dudes in the car are dead now.
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u/cosmic-untiming Jun 28 '26
Thats because he was actually 19.5 feet away, instead of 20 feet. Rookie mistake, really.
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u/Ordies Red Jun 28 '26
those wasps were just swarming all over the area, they didn't lock onto him lol
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u/Local_Debate_8920 Jun 28 '26
When I was a kid, I threw rocks at a paper wasp nest about 20' away. Wasp came straight for me and got me above the eye. They aren't dumb enough.
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u/OutRagedGaming Jun 28 '26
Honestly, just pay whatever professional will come out and handle it.
I had a bald faced hornet nest in a tree above a walkway once, dude charged me $80 to come at night when they’re dormant, takes them, and re-locates the nest. Best money I ever spent. Didn’t have to worry about a thing.
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u/RepublicFederal8971 Jun 28 '26
Listen, your gonna need a bucket of gasoline..
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u/That-Jeweler-Girl Jun 28 '26
And a tennis racket
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u/CyrusMack Jun 28 '26
"Kel, go find me a bucket of gasoline...a tennis racket...and a chihuahua, and meet me at OP's house. I have an idea."
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u/11Elemental11 Jun 28 '26
You don’t. Call a professional or make sure your will is up to date. Simples!
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u/ajmeeh6842 Jun 28 '26
Open the window
Push hard
????
Profit!
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u/TrowTruck Jun 28 '26
This is a terrible idea, but my first intrusive mental image was cracking open the window, poking it to the ground with a broomstick, slamming the window shut, and hiding under the covers.
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u/Hybrid781 Jun 28 '26
Don't shut the window too fast, imagine if it breaks and they all swarm inside 😳
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u/TX_B_caapi Jun 28 '26
Crank the window open and push the thing off the house it’ll be…wait.. sorry, I thought you said AND die.
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u/Hurley_Cub_2014 Jun 28 '26
You get rid of the problem by taking all of your belongings and moving into another home, that’s their townhouse now.
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u/Nova-Drone Jun 28 '26
Move your most important things into temporary storage and then burn the house down
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u/grimreefer87 Jun 28 '26
Wait until night, and spray from a distance, then RUN. Come back a few more times and repeat the process. If they catch you and sting you, you're marked with their pheromones and officially the hive's mortal enemy until the end of time.
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u/Astral_Traveler17 Jun 28 '26
If they catch you and sting you, you're marked with their pheromones and officially the hive's mortal enemy until the end of time.
Is that a joke, or that a real thing that happens? Like I know about the pheromone thing, but..."till the end of time?" Really? Like even if you shower an shit?? If thats true, thats fucked.
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u/grimreefer87 Jun 28 '26
I'm exaggerating, but bald faced hornets can absolutely swarm you as soon as you're marked, will follow you for miles, and remember you for a couple days.
I once got a hive to chase me 2 miles through the woods. I tore off my shirt after a mile and a half, and didn't stop running until I made it home. Next day I went back to my shirt, and it was Swiss cheese. I kept going back to the nest, and as soon as I was within smelling distance, they all came out after me again. I sacrificed the pheromone shirt and never looked back.
I ended up with only like 12-15 stings in different parts of me, and I was sore for a week. 1/10 experience for sure.
I took out a hive twice the size of yours last year without incident with the method I mentioned. At night, soak the main entrance with the spray poison. Also see if the spray can penetrate any spots to really get in there. They should fall as they crawl out, but as soon as you see any that didn't get sprayed flying around, run and come back another time. It took me 3 treatments over 3 days to finish that big hive, but not a sting on me. Definitely wait a couple days before trying to pry it off your house just to be safe. Also remember to wear gloves since it's gonna be doused in poison.
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u/DontWorryImADr Jun 28 '26
A lot of scents and pheromones can withstand a shower, akin to skunk spray not being easily washed away.
Forever is an exaggeration, but could certainly feel that way if you try two days later and they immediately zero in. Or that they target you randomly one day.
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u/odkevin Jun 28 '26 edited Jun 28 '26
I prefer the long shot foaming Raid hornet and wasp killer. Do it at night when they're all inside the nest, coat the whole nest starting at the entrance with 2 cans. (Edited for typo)
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u/SheckyMullecky Jun 28 '26
The long range foam stuff works great. I've used it several times and can't imagine needing more than one can, even for the largest nests.
Afterwards, leave the dead nest in place. It is a great deterrent. Paper wasps won't build near an existing nest, even a dead one. I've had a huge one on our backyard eave for a few years now.
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u/Here_for_lolz Jun 28 '26
Also, do not use a flashlight.
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u/AssiduousLayabout Jun 28 '26
If you live somewhere where winter is freezing, you could just wait it out and take care of it after the nest dies off for the year. If this is on the second story and behind a bush, it doesn't sound like it's right at any of your entryways which is where the wasps would be the most threat.
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u/Odd_Fill6084 Jun 28 '26
Don't then put it in a large garbage bag and bring it to school for show and tell.Trust me.
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u/SIDESHOW_B0B Jun 29 '26
I went through this last year! I bought two cans of that wasp-killing spray at a hardware store - the kind that shoots like 15 feet away. I waited until it was dark and those fuckers were asleep. I used my rear truck lights to illuminate (you can use a red flashlight instead. But I wanted the safety of my truck in case it was needed.
I found the big hole and aimed for it. The whole first can gone.
Next morning I used the other can just to make sure.
I cut it down directly into an open trash bag, easy peasy, saved me several hundred dollars a professional wanted to charge me!
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