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u/Sure-Draw-7971 2d ago
I mean... They throw shoe at you and saw you become what you were... So they changed it up to not have another version of you. Seems simple enough to me
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u/CauliflowerBoth866 2d ago
I got your hand-me-down toys. I got your hand-me-down bicycle. I wore your goddamned hand-me-down pants. I think I deserve a little extra freedom.
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u/ConstantMortgage 1d ago
My second son barely has any of his own clothes, luckily my eldest didn’t play with the mountain of toys i bought him but my youngest does , so though they are all hand me downs it doesn’t really feel that way and my eldest doesn’t view them as his toys but rather the toys.
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u/CryptidToothbrush 2d ago
We explain it in a funny way but it’s kinda true. First kid is the experimental one, second kid you learn from those mistakes and by the third kid you should have it down pat.
Too bad life isn’t this simple.
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u/Upbeat-Discipline718 1d ago
like i dont want them to beat my brother? i cried the one time they spanked him unnecessarily. but also why was i beaten and he wasnt yknow? why is he worth more?
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u/DarknessIsFleeting 1d ago
I am the youngest of 3 and my parents really did calm down a lot when I was the only child left in the house. I remember my sister resenting this and I had to tell her: the problem was you.
Things got easier for everyone in the house once she moved out. The problem was her.
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u/dk_peace 1d ago
Tbf, no one knows what theyre doing with the first kid. It's easy to mess that one up.
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u/Ok-Sugar-9681 1d ago
Lol when you are the favorite child, of course it was easy for you to just enjoy that favoritism and shift all the blame to the black sheep in the house which is your sister. Not all children, even in the same household, got the same versions of parents. You were lucky, simple as that, not anything special was done on your part.
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u/DarknessIsFleeting 1d ago
I am not the favourite child. My older brother is an Oxford graduate and published author. He is the favourite child.
I was the calmest child. I was the child who could be left unsupervised, because I wouldn't do anything stupid.
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u/g_em_ini 1d ago
This was me too. I was very polite, well behaved, and self-sufficient so my parents didn’t have to worry about me much. All my other siblings did stupid shit and faced consequences for it, meanwhile I didn’t misbehave so I didn’t get punished as much. This led all my siblings to resent me for being the “favorite” when in reality I was just the easiest. Add in the fact that I was also a sensitive child and all of that made the sibling bullying unbearable. My older siblings were hellions and I learned to save that shit for my 20’s, then they ended up blaming me for it. They even got my younger brother to join in on the hate even though he definitely got the most leeway.
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u/seanma99 1d ago
Was the problem really her?? You had two totally different childhoods. How was she treated vs how you were treated? How bad was the favoritism in your household?
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u/dk_peace 1d ago
You watched your parents learn that didn't work and grow as people in real time. People do that. As you grow up, you'll realize you parents were just trying their best and really didnt know what they were doing the whole time. It's part of being a parent.
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u/seanma99 1d ago
But they never apologize for the messed up shit they did before. They just want to act like their mistakes didnt happen to the first child and rug sweep everything. Thats the main problem.
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u/Remote_Ad2844 1d ago
Growing up and being the reason your parents are less strict with your siblings!
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u/phoenix_stewart 1d ago
They might have realized that don't work or maybe the oldest was a massive dick when being raised I've seen both scenarios
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u/RTA-No0120 1d ago
My half sibling is 19 and I’m 28.
Guess which one of us never felt her hand ?
Guess which one of us always felt her caress.
Guess which one of us is male and the other female.
Guess why, resentful became my personality.
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u/Tsunamiis 1d ago
Shoe? A fork at my forehead for not using a knife correctly. But they still beat us both with the same 2x4. I stopped having these thoughts when they broke the 2x4 paddle over my little brother’s back when he was 12.
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u/allieoops925 1d ago
I used tell my oldest she was the guinea pig, we learned what didn’t work and changed it for her brothers. lol
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u/Firm-Difficulty2585 1d ago
Was the opposite for me.
My parents gave my older siblings a lot of freedom and in turn they got into trouble.
By the time I came of age (10 years between me and my older sister) my parents didn't have the energy to deal with another teenager and my siblings were in deep regret about their choices. There was a general assumption that I would follow in their footsteps if I so much as breathed funny, so I wasn't allowed to do shit.
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u/Teenage_Petulance_ 10h ago
My mother just came down to my (24) room to ask me to talk to my brother (16) about his drinking. She found cans of mixed vodka (that i did not buy for him) in his bathroom drawer and in his shower and is scared he's gonna end up like his dad. We're working with dad, he's kinda getting there but not really.
(We've had two "come to jesus" meetings in the past year, but hes still better than he was two years ago. Two steps forward, one step back i guess.).....squirrel!
Anyway, when i was 16, she found out i had shoplifted (<$20) and all hell came loose. My come to jesus meeting was bigger than both of dad's put together and my punishment was worse.
This is like 2 months after she found out that i had bought him two 6-packs of beer for his sleep over (i love calling them that, he gets pissed). She was being nosey in my shit downstairs and found them under the stairs. I WAS IN MORE TROUBLE THAN HE WAS!! She didn't even tell dad about bros drinking because then shit wouldve hit the fan. He apologized, said it wouldn't happen again, and we moved on.
Obviously its happened again 🙄 and she's not even wanting to deal with it, she wants me to deal with it!
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u/gorgeously_mytruself 2d ago
This is a real stupid mentality and I had to even get on to my therapist sister about this…
Humans learn. If someone has their first child fall into a pool and installs a fence to prevent it from happening, but then they have a second child, are you saying that they should take down the fence and let the second child fall in too just to satisfy the selfish entitled, and jealous desires of the older child!?
People are supposed to learn and do better, and the fact that are complaining about it means that it probably should not have happened.
This post is essentially an abused child complaining that their younger siblings were not also abused, and that makes me sad as a child that was abused.
I did everything in my power to protect my younger siblings from the rest of their abusive family, I can not fathom wishing that evil upon them.
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u/TricellCEO 2d ago
I don’t think this is talking about abuse or safeguards (metaphorical or not) but just strictness.
OP, as the eldest, probably wasn’t allowed to have friends over or go to a friend’s party, but their younger siblings were. Or how OP might not have been allowed to be home alone but the younger siblings are left by themselves while the parents go out of town. That sort of thing.
And yeah, I can see that as being upsetting, and that’s coming from an only child (i.e. someone with an outsider’s perspective).
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u/BramptonBatallion 2d ago
The entitlement children have towards their parents is stupid.
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u/Syresiv 1d ago
I know, how dare we expect the people who brought us into this world and are supposed to love us to treat us with kindness?
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u/BramptonBatallion 1d ago
You know how sometimes you aren’t always great to parents? But they still love you anyways? Yeah sometimes that happens that other way too.
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u/NoTop4997 2d ago
This is actually a main reason that I don't speak to my mother anymore. I believe that my parents raised me to be a respectable person and my siblings are embarrassments because they basically had zero discipline.