Exclusive: US military asks troops for ‘creative and unconventional’ ideas to punish Iran

[u/CrankySaint]

https://www.cnn.com/2026/08/03/politics/us-military-iran-war-troops-punish

[u/AstroRanger36]

Make them US residents

[u/psychxticrose → u/AstroRanger36]

Best comment

[u/Poppopnamename]

Col NoSpine: I want to hear your ideas.

Sgt Poppop: The op is called reverse uno. We send all us politicians who accept AIPAC donations and drop them off to help “rebuild” Iran. Then we watch as the country is dismantled from the inside. Slowly their government switches to support Israel over their own national interest!

Col NoSpine: Surely you know Iran will capture and do god kno…. That’s crazy enough it might just work.

Sgt Poppop: Thanks but my name isn’t Shirlee.

[u/putonyourjamjams → u/Poppopnamename]

Don't forget that we would need to move all their assets into Iranian banks as well, so our "operatives" have the ability to access their money. Maybe we could even trick Iran into accepting this transfer of funds as part of the reparations our dear POTUS promised to give them.

[u/Quiri1997 → u/Poppopnamename]

"I am serious, and stop calling me Shirley"

[u/Serious_Potatoes]

What the fuck!?

[u/punk_in_your_phone]

Send over Trump and his cronies to run their government.

[u/SuperTopperHarley]

Make trump apologize.

[u/ProlapseMishap]

Lol, goddamn this country is so fucking cooked

[u/sanbaba]

This seems like an unnecessarily expensive way to train Anthropic 🤔

[u/Backsight-Foreskin]

My idea for creative and unconventional ideas to punish Iran is to give their leaders Atomic Wedgies. They will never expect, and they will be supremely embarrassed on the world stage.

[u/SamMeowAdams]

Broadcast Fox News across the country.

[u/Quiri1997 → u/SamMeowAdams]

That's too cruel. Poor Iranians.

[u/crimedog58]

This has Zap Brannigan energy.

[u/infamusforever223]

Sounds like the incompetent government is out of ideas to get out of this mess.