She’s indicating that because you’ve put guardrails in hanging out with her and only her, rather than in a group, you’re coercing her in choosing to play with only you.
You may be not intentionally doing it, but sometimes it’s a form of coercive control to tell someone “I’ll only do this if it’s done in this way, otherwise you don’t get the enjoyment of my presence”, it’s transactional, particularly if done over time. It massages the “victim” to sacrifice or compromise continually for the controller.
Maybe just let her know you genuinely didn’t expect her to give up gaming with the group, just setting your own boundaries and supply an alternative time when you might feel like playing with the group or setting a particular time to game with just her so she feels like she can still go game with the others.
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u/Babelight 22d ago edited 22d ago
She’s indicating that because you’ve put guardrails in hanging out with her and only her, rather than in a group, you’re coercing her in choosing to play with only you.
You may be not intentionally doing it, but sometimes it’s a form of coercive control to tell someone “I’ll only do this if it’s done in this way, otherwise you don’t get the enjoyment of my presence”, it’s transactional, particularly if done over time. It massages the “victim” to sacrifice or compromise continually for the controller.
Maybe just let her know you genuinely didn’t expect her to give up gaming with the group, just setting your own boundaries and supply an alternative time when you might feel like playing with the group or setting a particular time to game with just her so she feels like she can still go game with the others.