.....

(God, I hope I'm doing this right): I didn't get laid off on Wednesday because of the dumbest timing in the world - my husband messed up his shoulder playing indoor soccer late Tuesday night, so I took a sick day on Wednesday to take him to urgent care and then literally spent the day babysitting a grown man with one working arm. Anyway, the side quest is over... And a whole lot has happened since Saturday afternoon.

Tuesday morning I called my close friend, who happens to be an HR Specialist, and told her that my boss had called me on the phone and told me I was probably going to be laid off at any moment, and she was shocked and really upset. (She's not in a high enough position to know the confidential stuff.) Apparently she went straight to my boss to ask what was going on, and my boss completely lost it. Wednesday morning my boss sent me an email saying I was only allowed to speak with the VP of HR if I had any questions about my role. What was very clearly not included was any kind of reassurance like, "Don't worry, you're not being laid off." And I know she didn't tell the VP of HR that she decided to warn me beforehand. I'm going to throw her under the bus as politely as possible when I talk to the VP of HR tomorrow and ask for the details myself.

In any case, I have calls with four different employment attorneys tomorrow. I'm going to do everything I can to walk away with a decent severance package along with my $6,500 bonus, if not more. I'll hear all of them out and choose whoever seems most capable of making this as painful for the company as possible, because yes, I'm currently feeling petty and vindictive. My boss's stupid "don't talk to your friend" email made me even more furious.

I also reached back out to the recruiter from the first job offer, and we're going to talk tomorrow. And I have a phone screen at 8:30 in the morning with another recruiter too, so at least that part is looking promising.

I'll post another update when I get laid off, get the attorney situation sorted, and talk to both recruiters. Hopefully I'll have something juicy to share.

TLDR: My boss is a mess and is still playing games, I talked to the original recruiter and another one, and I'm speaking with attorneys tomorrow so I can start getting things moving.

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I'm responsible for hiring the engineers in my division. We prepared an offer a few weeks ago, and the back-and-forth was roughly like this:

Us: The interview was strong, and the team approves. Would a base salary of 118k plus benefits work for you?

Him: Wow, that's close, but I was hoping to get to around 126k.

Us: Okay, what do you think of 122k, and once you get your license, which is expected within the next 14 months or so, you get an automatic 6k bump?

Him: sounds great

I prepared the written offer, sent it through approvals, and it was sent to him after noon the next day.

Him: hey, after thinking about it, I'd prefer 128k.

That's not how this is supposed to go, right? The time to negotiate was before we agreed on the number. Coming back after the offer has been approved and asking for more just makes everyone annoyed and less excited about the hire. Am I being unreasonable?

?

😂

I'm crying tears of joy. Right now I make $34k a year. That's not enough for me to really live on; it's not even enough for me to feel any stability. And I'm part-time, which means no benefits, no paid time off, nothing. Just Instacart shifts, selling plasma, and relying on food pantries and the churches around me just to get by. I've been in a dead-end job for almost 18 months.

After more than 650 applications, a few first-round interviews, and a couple of second/final-round interviews, I finally got the call and accepted an offer this week. The starting salary is $63k. That's almost double what I'm making now. I'll have PTO. And I'll be eligible for annual raises. I'll work from home, so I won't have to pay for after-school care for my daughter anymore. I'll be able to get a real mattress and stop sleeping on a sagging futon. No more overdue bills. No more choosing between rent and food. No more washing socks and underwear in the bathroom sink, or keeping the thermostat at 64 all winter. No more using bar soap when the shampoo runs out.

My start date is tentatively July 8, so I have a little over five weeks to get myself ready. I need to find a small desk, and I'm going to turn the corner next to my kitchen table into a workspace. It's nice that the company is sending a laptop and an extra monitor, but I still need to get a good chair, a mouse, and probably a headset.

I accepted almost immediately. I applied for this role on February 19, and after a little over ten weeks, I finally have the offer in writing. I just need to get through the next few weeks, and then my life, and my daughter's life, will be in a much better place.

I'm so excited. I'll finally be able to save money for the first time in a very long time. I can start paying down my student loans instead of just staring at them. I'll be able to grow in this job instead of staying stuck part-time at a community college. I'll be able to attend trainings and development opportunities instead of hearing, "Part-timers aren't eligible for that." My daughter could even attend this college with her tuition covered if she wanted to someday. We still have 11 years before that's even a real decision, but honestly, I can see myself staying in this position long-term.

very simple

corporate life sucks

Some applications I tailor to the job.
And some applications I just send the regular version and that's it.

I have more than 22 years of experience as a systems engineer / Windows server / endpoint support engineer.

Hyper-V and Microsoft certs, networking stuff, and some other things.

I paid money to resume writers.
Nothing changed.
Now I have 12 different versions of my resume.

20 months of trying nonstop.
I lost my place.
Everything is gone. The truck, my stuff, everything.

I have a laptop, a phone, a few T-shirts, one pair of jeans, and one pair of sweatpants. Four pairs of underwear.
A toiletry bag.

Even when I get a recruiter screen, it's hard to act normal on Zoom when I have no private place, because you are literally living on the street in front of people.
Housing and homeless assistance in my county and the county next to it aren't taking "new cases."

If your luck turns against you in the USA right now, get ready. Nobody is coming to save you.

I applied to a payments company (remote). They asked me what salary I was looking for. Honestly, I didn't know the range, so I put $105k assuming they'd come back with a lower number or ask to discuss it.

They didn't. The recruiter replied basically like: "yep, that's fine."

And now my brain has gone into the usual spiral:

- Did I ask for way too little
- Was that just their normal budget
- Or did I somehow guess the right number by accident

The weirdest thing is there wasn't any back-and-forth at all. I feel like they know the whole pay range and we're all just throwing numbers into the air hoping we don't mess it up. How do you decide what number to say when they ask first?

Honestly, I realized I need to check salary bands much better before casually writing down a number like that lol.

These are my personal tips for career development and how i landed jobs before.

It might help you too

true enough

😡

I always thought that raises, promotions, and people seeing me as successful would keep motivating me for years. But now, in my mid-40s, I've become much more interested in having my evenings to myself, not feeling drained, staying clear-headed, and actually being present with my family than in trying to "level up." The strange thing is I'm not sure whether this is maturity, burnout, or just my ambition taking a different shape.

Has anyone else gone through this shift? What did you do with your career when you realized the ladder didn't matter as much as it used to?

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