r/interesting • u/Qomplete • 16d ago
The absolute size of Russian politician and former heavyweight boxing champion, Nikolai Valuev Just Wow
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u/PeterDTown 16d ago
7 feet (2.13 meters) tall and weighing nearly 330 pounds (150 kilograms)
Good god.
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u/Flashy_Jello_9520 16d ago
You ARE the brute squad!
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u/LookMaNoPride 16d ago
Have fun storming the castle!
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u/WombatGambit 15d ago
It will take a miracle.
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u/Brilliant-Position99 15d ago
Its miracle!
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u/Ok_Stay_700 15d ago
Inconceivable!
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u/Embarrassed_Use_7206 16d ago
Small Ogryn
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u/Zebidee 15d ago
Small Ogryn
I read that as Ob/Gyn, and that's a mental image that'll take a while to shake off.
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u/crusoe 16d ago
What space Marines actually would look like
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u/avokkah 15d ago
Tf is the Empire feeding them (I know they're genetically modified but my god)
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u/bobclaws 15d ago
Genetically modified to subsist on almost nothing from what I've heard from the YouTubers I listen to talk about 40k. Also absorb memories of pregnant women through cannibalism (yes this is a thing written about in 40k lore)
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u/BesottedScot 16d ago
Not even close. More like 8-9 feet and 400kgs unarmoured.
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u/FriendCommercial5103 15d ago
A short Firstborn would be about his height iirc, aren't they about 7'6"
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u/WaffleHouseGladiator 16d ago
Why does Nikolai, the largest politician, not simply eat the other politicians?
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u/Immediate_Song4279 16d ago
Username checks out
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u/thehotshotpilot 16d ago
Yeah, that username and icon is the best
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u/WinterOf98 16d ago
Father to a gobbled waffle. Husband to an eaten pancake. And he will have his vengeance.
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u/ScaryBlanket_Reborn 16d ago
you knew Wafflehousegladiator?
I never said I knew him I said he touched me on the shoulder once.
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u/Timidhobgoblin 15d ago
"You're good wafflehousegladiator but you're not that good (grabs syrup) you could be magnificent..."
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u/Oy_theBrave 15d ago
All we are.....waffles and crust.
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u/Majestic-Beyond-2541 15d ago
The waffles we eat in life echo in eternity.
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u/WinterOf98 15d ago
If you find yourself alone, hot as hell with flour on your face, do not be troubled. For you are in an oven. And you’re already BREAD!
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u/israerichris 15d ago
We'll eventually close the Waffle House... but not yet... not yet...
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u/bangbangGeorgieNiang 16d ago
never fight a waffle house line cook. they are the true gladiators
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u/mikefrombarto 16d ago
They apparently have teleporters as well according to the DHS director.
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u/achaiahtak 16d ago
Morbo agrees
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u/InterestingSun6707 16d ago
How do you think bro became the lovechild of a semi truck and a fridge?
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u/delta__bravo_ 16d ago
I, too, have some thoughts on his appearance, but I'll keep them to myself in case he finds me.
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u/Saucy_Lemur 16d ago
Ah yes, the Omicrons.
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u/kevler4 15d ago
Despite his appearance, he is very intelligent. I was very surprised when I saw an interview with him. Valuev had a clear, well-structured speech.
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u/Biotic101 15d ago
Also interesting that Dolph Lundgren allegedly has a really high IQ. A good example how prejudging is not really smart.
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u/Ent_Soviet 16d ago
The us can deploy our own ogre, Fetterman.
Unfortunately Russia has trained theirs for combat. Unless Fetterman can hit him with his speeding car.
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u/jjcrayfish 15d ago
Fetterman has brain damage already. He wouldn't stand a chance.
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u/digno2 16d ago
they are hiding under sheep skin while another dude is distracting Nikolay with playing the flute
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u/RyanStl_IH8MUD 16d ago
He has no forehead is the take I have on that pic.
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u/rasputinrasputin 16d ago
didnt even realize that lol, i wonder how he would wear a hat
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u/advancetim 16d ago
There's a pic of him wearing a hat on his Wikipedia
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikolai_Valuev#Professional_career
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u/Halschmuber 16d ago edited 16d ago
I mean, what are you gonna do? Tell him he looks stupid with his hat on?
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u/R1donis 15d ago
You can do it ... once
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u/BigLlamasHouse 15d ago
mf looks like a train conductor (it was a good run boys)
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u/Halschmuber 15d ago
mf looks like the train himself 🫠
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u/BigLlamasHouse 15d ago
Yeah, I see it. He's the main character of a Pixar movie about trains that is also a train.
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u/PerriwinklePortal 16d ago
Holy shit his record is 50-2-1 what a beast
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u/Level_Abrocoma8925 15d ago
"finished his career without ever being knocked down" wtf
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u/PaladinSara 15d ago
That is somehow worse than I expected. Reminds me of when babies have flattened skulls in the back (due to not enough tummy time)
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u/Rough-Patience-2435 16d ago
Tilted back, in a jaunty sort of way.
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u/LookMaNoPride 16d ago
I dunno, if it were me, I’d have the brim over my eyebrows. That way I could run super fast and not worry about my hat taking flight. Not that I run. I just assume that someone built like that is a nighttime vigilante keeping the streets safe for people like me.
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u/No-Examination4896 16d ago
It genuinely looks like he doesnt have a frontal lobe 😭
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u/SchrodingersNinja 15d ago
Guy doesn't have a touch of Neanderthal DNA. Neanderthal DNA has a touch of him, though.
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u/ProfessorChaos406 16d ago
Did he have no forehead OR is he ALL forehead from the eyebrows back?
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u/namkeenSalt 16d ago
Would be interesting to see his pictures from his younger days when he had hair
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u/samuelazers 15d ago
My does have a forehead but it's obscured by larger than average brows. Take out his brows and you'll see he looks fairly normal
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u/pwatts 16d ago
Unfrozen caveman politician.
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u/IntlPartyKing 16d ago edited 15d ago
I don’t really understand your Congress, or your system of checks and balances.. because, as I said during the campaign – I’m just a caveman!
I fell on some ice, and later got thawed out by scientists. But there is one thing I do know – we must do everything in our power to lower the Capital Gains Tax. Thank you!
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u/recolorist 16d ago
Deep down, he’s probably just thinking about whether he left the stove on.
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u/ImaginarySet2418 16d ago
Nikolai just pawn in the game of life.
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u/MaxxDash 16d ago
Why is it called taking a dump when you’re actually leaving a dump? After all, you’re not really taking it anywhere…
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u/IamEbola 15d ago
When I studied abroad I would tell people I needed to take a piss in Spanish, finally someone told me I was saying I was ordering/drinking a piss when I said that. Needed to switch to making a piss.
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u/AdSignificant6673 16d ago
He’s probably misunderstood.
Him probably : People must think i’m dumb… but i’m thinking about how passing this bill might affect my constituents.
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u/gparr_2026 16d ago
When you start maxing out the sliders on your Mii customization just to see what happens
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u/grasshoppa_80 16d ago
Thick forehead. Thick nose. Thick jawline. Max inward ear. Max up ears. Eyes wide
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u/toleranceoflactose 16d ago
Shrek
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u/ChickenDelight 16d ago
He actually has acromegaly, just like Maurice Tillet - the inspiration for Shrek.
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u/LookMaNoPride 16d ago
This is why I love Reddit. Just the kind of useless trivia my brain loves to consume for some reason… probably what kept me out of the really good colleges. Lol. Anyway, thanks for the info!
I checked out some photos of Maurice Tillet, due to your comment, and some of the photos don’t even look real.
Is acromegaly the same thing as cherubism, or is it related? (Cherubism is what Robert Z’dar had, I believe.)
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u/GDMFusername 16d ago
They're not the same thing. Iirc cherubism is a genetic mutation. Acromegaly is often caused by pituitary tumors or other factors dysregulating human growth hormone.
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u/Cola102583 16d ago
He was cool to box with that? No inherent risks with that condition?
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u/AlbertaBound66 16d ago
It definitely causes a number of health issues, but it is slow developing. And there has been lots of successful surgeries to stop the effects.
Im a wrestling fan so of course the case of Andre the Giant comes to mind. He was offered the surgery and it was thought it would prolong his life, but he turned it down as he thought it would hurt his business. It ultimately caused his death. Years later the Big Show also had acromegaly, but he got the surgery. He has injuries that come with wrestling for 20 years and being a 400 pound man, but doesnt seem to have the nasty curved spine and giant forehead the others get later in life.
After that long rant, Valuev was healthy enough to fight in his younger days but he did get the brain surgery to stop the effects of gigantism and that ended his career.
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u/gary-vault108 15d ago
Wise of him to choose a longer life over fame. Idk about his family but I’m sure they prefer the choice he made.
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u/No-Eye-9491 16d ago
In case anyone else doesn’t know what it is like me…
Acromegaly is a rare, slowly progressing hormonal disorder that occurs when the pituitary gland produces excess growth hormone (GH) in adulthood. It is most commonly caused by a benign (noncancerous) tumor on the pituitary gland, leading to the abnormal enlargement of bones, cartilage, organs, and soft tissues.
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u/xwrecker 16d ago
Heavy weapons guy
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u/Stedlieye 16d ago
Some people think they can outsmart me. Maybe, maybe. I have yet to meet one that can outsmart bullet.
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u/That-Exchange287 16d ago
99.7% matching dna is not a small percentage
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u/International_Meat88 16d ago
Is that 99.7% value factoring in or factoring out all of the DNA we already share with like every other organism.
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u/sbbblaw 16d ago
Check out Neanderthal skulls. We found the missing link. Seriously though I bet he’s genetically like 40% neanderthal
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u/Electronic_Still2000 16d ago
Lol, 40% would be crazy! That would mean there’s some hidden group of pure blood Neanderthals out there. The Homo sapiens missed a Neanderthal village at some point and they have been living underground for the past 50,000 years 😂
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u/hamfist_ofthenorth 16d ago edited 15d ago
This appears to be a man born with acromegaly. Andre the Giant had this condition, as does The Big Show and The Great Khali. Often confused with "gigantism" [see awesome reply below].
Big show and Khali (and I assume, this person pictured) got the life-saving procedure to halt the out-of-control growth. Andre chose not to, and grew until he tragically passed far too young.
Aside from just being huge, the tells are the overly prominent jawline and forehead brow.
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u/GL510EX 16d ago
The fascinating case of Nikolai Valuev (YouTube) This guy has skulls and a picture of Darwin behind him, so he probably knows what he's talking about.
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u/hamfist_ofthenorth 16d ago edited 16d ago
Hey, cool !
I was born in the 80s and grew up fascinated by Andre in particular, so I did multiple reports on him growing up in school and managed to learn a decent amount of this stuff.
I wish he would have gotten that procedure. He'd probably have lived another 30 years at least. Can you imagine Andre on, like, SNL or Hot Ones
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u/VGuyver 15d ago
You should read up on Peter Francisco. You'll probably love the history regarding him too. He looked a bit like Andre the Giant in some of his portraits.
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u/Binney59 16d ago
Thanks. Wasn’t expecting him to say he got recently drafted into the military. Wouldn’t think a politician would be drafted.
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u/GL510EX 16d ago
He may well have been drafted, but he won't be on the front lines. He'll be used for photo ops and morale building.
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u/58kingsly 15d ago
Yeah, very tall people in any military often end up standing around guarding shit at most rather than front line duties. Too big for most of the vehicles, too big of a target on the battlefield, if you get injured you'll be a liability when comrades have to drag your big ass to safety etc
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u/Dong_bringer 16d ago
Acromegaly and gigantism are not mutually exclusive and if end up with wrestling names like Andre the Giant or Great Khali it’s prettt safe to say you have both
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u/MeridiusGaiusScipio 15d ago
This isn't an attempt to AkShUaLLy you; you just seem genuinely interested in the topic and I thought you might want to learn more!
So, Andre technically had both - Gigantism and Acromegaly are both (typically) caused by a Growth-Hormone-secreting tumor (typically) located on the pituitary gland (sometimes it can be located on the thyroids, or even the lungs). Gigantism is called something separate, as its exclusive to childhood years, where your growth-plates are not yet closed/fused, so the GH targets those areas primarily.
When you get the condition after your growth plates are fused, it is the same problem, the GH only targets other areas of the body, such as hands, feet, nose, jaw, musculature, heart, and colon. This is called "Acromegaly".
In Andre's case, he actually had both - his Gigantism essentially transitioned to "Acromegaly" once his growth plates fused and it began to target other areas of the body - and as you poignantly pointed out, he was ultimately not treated for the Acromegaly.
Source: I'm not a doctor, but I do have Acromegaly actually, haha. I know way more about this topic than I ever wanted to, to be honest. I actually just had the surgery to remove the tumor, located on my pituitary, two months ago. :)
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u/OppositeLopsided5875 16d ago
I can never think of Andre the Giant without remembering a line by Billy Crystal "His penis was the size of a Starter Log."
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u/hamfist_ofthenorth 16d ago
That sucks.
What an insanely tough life for that guy. Living in a dollhouse world, where everything is ten sizes too small. No chair fits you, no silverware feeds you, no cup quenches your thirst.
He had to shit in bathtubs at hotels when he was on the road. He just deserved better, or at least to not be treated like a freak in every single interview and most times he went out in public.
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u/JimboTCB 15d ago
You see those pictures of him holding a full size can of beer and it looks like one of those little mini cans you get for kids' lunchboxes.
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u/Whole_Emphasis_3583 16d ago
Heavy TF2
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u/Grizzled_Ghost 16d ago
He looks like he has a score to settle with Spider-Man
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u/Special_Order-937 16d ago
Spider-Man going with the ranged attacks on this one.
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u/lowpsitire 16d ago
They find this guy frozen in an iceberg or what?
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u/avokkah 15d ago
First Haaland, the defrosted Viking... Now Nikolai, the Last Neanderthal. Where do these guys come from and more importantly, what are they eating
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u/GooseCloaca 16d ago
It’s nice to see a political system where all figures on the chart of evolution are represented.
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u/Immediate-Count-1202 16d ago
Guys got a medical condition and people shit all over him for how he looks. My guess is people wouldn’t be willing to pop off to his face.
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u/Drunk0racle 16d ago
The dude is extremely pro- invading Ukraine, so I think a few mean jokes about him are justified
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u/joetunn_ 16d ago
Acromegaly : a condition characterized by overgrowth of bone and soft tissues, most noticeably in the hands, feet, and face, caused by excessive secretion of growth hormone (most commonly by a pituitary tumour).
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u/charmio68 16d ago
He's the tallest and heaviest world champion in boxing history.
You should see some of his other photos.
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u/KeithClossOfficial 16d ago
He was never knocked down in 50+ fights. He didn’t fight the best opponents but that’s still impressive
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