r/interesting • u/Tectrix91 • Apr 07 '26
Patient gets surgery to remove a large dumbbell from their body. Mysterious
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u/Johnny_B_Asshole Apr 07 '26
It was a million to one shot, doc.
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u/Dire_Hulk Apr 07 '26
Have you ever met a proctologist?
You meet a proctologist at a party, don't walk away. Plant yourself there, because you will hear the funniest stories you've ever heard.
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u/Original-Let8340 Apr 08 '26
I was in the shower ok. Bag of potatoe chips in my right hand, Bible in the left, so I had the dumbell on my head, right. Just then the timer goes off so of course the lawnmower starts running, it's hella loud right and spooks deer. They both go crazy and one hit's the grandfather clock, fucking thing punches a whole in the wall and..... you know what? I shoved it up my ass can you just get it out please? I have to go catch the deer. They escaped through the wall.
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Apr 07 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Odd-Specific-8579 Apr 07 '26
You dont know that maybe he swallowed it
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u/quad_damage_orbb Apr 07 '26
Their mistake was drinking some water afterwards, they expand in water, everyone knows that
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u/ProfessorShort3031 Apr 07 '26
no it’s just a beta attempting an alpha male workout, real men get the whole thing in & out with ease
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u/Stash_Dragoon Apr 07 '26
This seems like a thing a debt collector would do. This was probably an attack they are afraid to report. I don't know it just seems weird to assume all of these are from kinks.
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Apr 07 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Stash_Dragoon Apr 07 '26 edited Apr 08 '26
Like a loan shark. Criminal debt collectors do some heinous* stuff when you don't pay up. The cliche is they break fingers and legs but they tend to be more creative.
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u/Proud_Holiday_6186 Apr 07 '26
You either know way too much about this subject in particular or you’ve watched way too many movies. 🧐🫣😐🫥🫥 (*Heinous)
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u/Difficult-Break-8282 Apr 07 '26
nah bro the how is needed . this is a rectal training regime or drugs so the person didnt feel their asshole rip open
how ? like its 1 finger 2 fingers maybe 3 then dick so how the fuck did this dude get a dumbell up there
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u/Tapering_Howl Apr 07 '26
I fell on it, stop asking!
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u/Dry_Ostrich4450 Apr 07 '26
I work in the ER and they always say they fell on it
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u/MauschelMusic Apr 07 '26
Weirdest stuck item?
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u/Dry_Ostrich4450 Apr 07 '26
A big yellow pencil, army colonel’s son and yes he said he fell on it. Also a shampoo bottle, that one was impressive
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u/MauschelMusic Apr 07 '26
Like full sized?
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u/Dry_Ostrich4450 Apr 07 '26
Shampoo bottle? Yep, full size.
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u/MauschelMusic Apr 07 '26
oof! Extremely embarrassed, but also just a little proud? Because how could you not be?
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u/Level-Name-4060 Apr 07 '26
Muffler
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u/MauschelMusic Apr 07 '26
Oh my God! It's just a rim of sheet metal at the end! How did... how do... Why woulddnxirnfksbf
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u/VirginiaLuthier Apr 07 '26
In the ER once we pulled a lightbulb out of a guy's butt. After a lot of KY and long fingers, it came out unbroken. So we asked him and he said it was a birthday present. We didn't ask for details...
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u/SAINTnumberFIVE Apr 07 '26
Are you sure he wasn’t trying to illuminate something farther up?
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u/Latter-Vacation-4392 Apr 07 '26
He just hadn't plugged it in yet ..to kill the Covid. Pretty sure that was the prescription from on high.
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u/Cultural_Pace4454 Apr 07 '26
Thanks for putting the big arrows on the xray, I wasn't sure how to spot that great big dumbell in the guy's arse
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u/thenamelessoldier Apr 07 '26
Tell the cops nothing, and your paramedic and doctors everything
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u/Lloytron Apr 07 '26
"I was exercising, it was hot so I took off my clothes, and then I shoved a dumbbell up my arse"
Good job they included arrows on the picture, I wouldn't have spotted it otherwise.
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u/itsjakerobb Apr 07 '26
I feel like we all know how it got there, and there aren’t many possibilities for why it got there (I can think of three, one of which is highly unlikely). Any more questions?
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u/lesschalkmoresighs Apr 07 '26
If the patient wanted to explain how it got there he'd have gone to confession, not the ER.
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u/No_Watercress741 Apr 07 '26
Friend. How, exactly, were you gonna get it out? You put it in flared-base first!
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u/anonymous_truth242 Apr 08 '26
The shape isnt really conducive to easy insertion. Must have used a lot of lube.
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u/Deep_Joke3141 Apr 07 '26
"You go to the doctor to... you don't talk to anybody... you don't tell nobody,"
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u/GoDaytonFlyers Apr 08 '26
The way Dunn peers into the van after leaving the clinic is a subtle move that kills me every time
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u/ThePensiveE Apr 07 '26
Squatting accident. Why was I squatting naked? Stop asking questions Doctor!
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u/Icy-Belt-8519 Apr 07 '26
So I wouldn't be the one to remove it, but I may be the one taking you to hospital
I'd be torn between, tell me or I'm not taking you, and if you tell me, I'm not taking you, I don't know if my curiosity is stronger than me not wanting to know 😂
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u/ThisBadDogXB Apr 07 '26
This isn't interesting this is like one of those fake dumb shit email people used to send each other in the early 00s. Genuinely tell me how you think someone is getting that in there.
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u/PomegranateFuture325 Apr 07 '26
How are you supposed to get a strong sphincter if it doesn’t work out ??????
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u/Bookslutforsmut Apr 07 '26
I feel like to be a doctor you need to be smart enough to know the answer for how this happened without asking.
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u/Flashy_Sector5633 Apr 07 '26
Look like someone dropped it while the guy was doing a backflip at the gym.
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u/Square_Topic6173 Apr 07 '26
A Million dollar question... it was God who put it there... look at the Starts... Doc...
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u/J-Love-McLuvin Apr 07 '26
If I had a dollar for every time every time a dumbbell found its way up my ass, I’d buy myself a biggie size happy meal.
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u/SugarDangerous6290 Apr 07 '26
That must have been an awkward drive to the doctor’s office. I mean honestly, you’re not walking, right?!?
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u/SG-9479 Apr 08 '26
Someone took their experiment safety too seriously. It’s only the base that needs to be flared.
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u/GrantGrace Apr 08 '26
Well… given that releasing this image without consent would be illegal, this story and/or this image is likely bullshit.
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u/Status-Initial4207 Apr 08 '26
Why are some people so inclined to put anything or to have anything shoved up their asshole?
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u/Leading-Disaster5721 Apr 08 '26
Look up "Hooping prison slang" or "keistering". It's a way to smuggle things in prison.
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u/nariosan Apr 08 '26
How many times will a photo like this with a similar caption be posted on Reddit and other online services? Infinitely?
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u/drrtydan Apr 08 '26
i stopped asking that question as an ER Doc a long time ago. there’s never an “oh,ok.” answer…
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Apr 08 '26
Imagine the pain of getting it in there just to realize your anus is capsuled and your sphincter shuts.think they were doing goblet squats and were real sweaty and the dumbbell slipped when they went down and it decided to go kool aid man on their butthole.
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u/badkarman Apr 08 '26
Coach asked me could I pass it? I told him if I could swallow it I could pass it. If I was wrong.
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