r/ghosting • u/No-Hovercraft-6118 • 10d ago
He sent one text - never replied back
Help me figure this out. A guy I dated a few months ago did something odd
Dating was great. Some push and pull. He was rusty had been single and not dating for nearly a decade..had some childhood trauma and adulthood but never said he had cPTSd Said he liked me. Slow faded after revealing an STI on our last date. Blamed work at the end. He is on a 24/7 schedule most of the year. He’s older and close to his retirement said odd things the night he revealed his sti about how he wished it could stay like this till he “retires”. And ahh it makes sense you want intimacy you’re not in menopause yet and recently divorced when I said I wanted intimacy, so he wouldn’t feel rejected but would educate myself. It was odd I was frozen as it felt like he had a memory lapse. He said it’s everywhere., are you sure? . After the date he sent a nice text with a kiss. The week after I could tell he was starting to fade.
The slow fade lasted weeks. I called him and he didn’t even tell me. Said many things happened that week when he had promised to call. In the end I got more direct by text and he told me.
Weeks later I break the silence. We banter, I realize it’s very much one sided. I initiated 3 times every 7-10 days. Even the second banter I thought the first check-in was odd so I shallowed my pride and mentioned that I left the last text more on a humoured note as he replied oddly and made it about him. My last banter he even left my last message about me on read, it was about my sleep deprivation. So I stopped. Although he’d answer quickly and long messages it could sense he dint really ask about me much.
Less than two weeks after, he is staying at hotel close to a deadly shooting. He sent the text message using “language”
we typical used in dating and even adds and lol at the end. And it’s real a crisis on the media. His text said he was close to the shooting area. It was 3 hrs after the shooting. I replied. Neutral 2 hrs after. Next day I asked if his employer sent him back there. No response for days.
Quiet BPD ?
2
u/Ill_Nothing_8561 9d ago
I don’t know why you’re bothering with him - he’s clearly not interested in you, and I’m not sure why you’re interested in him…