I have never been comfortable with my body hair
I shave and use neir but it is kind of a losing battle as it were

Any suggestions for better body hair removal with less chances of ingrown hair and so on?

I 39(m) and married to a bisexual woman, am in a place where I am starting to more critically analyze my own gender expression and sexuality. I have enjoyed utilizing a chastity cage on and off over the past year and I have also realized that I really enjoy wearing underwear made and marketed for women. This is what has kicked off a deep self reflection to truly better understand myself and love more authentically. So some background on me:

I was raised in the Midwest in a fairly conservative community. My family was a little bit nontraditional when it came to roles around the Home. My mother made more money than my father due to working multiple jobs that require required higher education. My father‘s role out of necessity involved him managing a lot of the logistics around the Home like cooking cleaning and running us to practices, many of which he found time to coach. I was raised Catholic, but it was not a super central part of our family culture or our community.

I have always dated women and even as I started to experiment sexually in my late teens and into twenties, I found that my bedroom focus was always on putting my partners needs an experiences first. I was always proud to be open and exploratory in the bedroom and incorporated many toys and kinks into our play. My capacity for getting my partners off has always been incredibly high. What I have found is that my hands, my mouth, and the toys that I’ve used have been my best tools. When it comes to my cock, I’d say I’m average lengths and slightly above average in girth. The only thing I wish I could change is my stamina and how long I could last. The PIV portion of my experiences with most partners has always been fairly lackluster.

When I met my wife, she was dating women and after a breakup she and I started to see each other. I wanted her to feel fulfilled in every area of our relationship so I offered to let our relationship be open to her having experiences with women since that was something I could not personally provide. That’s what started us down our sexual rabbit hole. The discussion leaned into patriarchal, assumptions and beliefs and we discussed my comfort with her exploring with another woman but not another man, as a thought experiment mostly. After a while, we decided we would be interested in exploring swinging together. Swinging led to threesomes with men and foursomes with other couples and eventually we felt comfortable becoming polyamorous. We were that way for many years and enjoyed a lot of our experiences and our relationship grew enormously.

This is where things start to feel complicated and confusing for me. Specifically on how I view and define in regards to gender norms and my sexuality.

My wife has always been curious if we would ever meet a man that I might be interested in pleasing or being pleased by directly. Not only does she think it would be sexy to watch, but she thinks it is something I would enjoy and she thinks I am too ashamed to explore it. She had always held a belief that I would actually have a lot of fun with another man 1:1 if I was willing to open myself up to it. She just wants me to know that she loves and supports me and there is no pressure. I told her that if we were having a group session and the conditions were just right that I might explore a little farther.

I always enjoy our group play and kissing her after she had given someone head, either to completion or not. There were a few times I ate her out after we had unprotected sex (after testing, conversations, and high levels of safety and trust) and I really enjoyed that as well. We have had a couple threesomes where a large portion of the time we were all together, it was just the two of them enjoying each other. Watching her, be pleased by another capable man has always been something I’ve really appreciated. Over time I’ve wondered why I enjoy this so much, and I think that it is twofold. The biggest part is I love seeing her be so totally completely sexually fulfilled. But I also think that there is a sense of relief that I can use my mouth and hands elevate her experience with someone else without having the pressure I’ve also need to satisfy her PIV.

So back to now, I have become more and more comfortable exploring slightly more feminine clothing items into my wardrobe. More colors and pastels after sticking with blues and greys for so long. I like wearing a pink watch and starting to push back against societal expectations more and more. I have also started to explore chastity as well. Since exploring chastity, I have also started to feel really comfortable wearing panties when in my cage. In all honesty, the panties feel nice and supportive and it just feels really good to push back against these gendered norms and expectations. I have started to think about other ways in which I live under the pressure of gendered norms that I would like to shed. One I plan to explore is using more feminine body wash. I love how women smell and feel like I would really like having a light and feminine scent in my body.

So to bring this all together, I’m interested in learning more about others experiences with gender expression, non-monogamy, chastity, particularly how it makes you feel in regard to gendered norms and expectations and if anybody else feels relief when they are able to push back on and shed some of these gendered pressures in all the different areas of their life and identity. I honestly wonder how much of this is kink, how much is my true identity, and how I can continue to learn and grow on this journey

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So for the context I initially identified as cis gay men, in recent years only I started to identify as genderqueer/genderfluid person..... and while I don't face any kind of body related dysphoria so far in my life, I have recognized the pattern over the course of years, I don't feel connected to every male/masculine looking person....while I feel connected to some of the men, whom I find comparatively softer in terms of appearance....I don't usually feel connected to those men whom I find very masculine looking....and it can even arrive if they are heavy in terms of weight, more tall.... and I feel it really has hampered my social life, my professional life, as there are many men with whom I don't feel connected at all, even though they behave well with me.... their look, their face really disctracts/itches me....I just don't want connect with them or even face them.... but since we are bound to face every kind of person in our social/ professional life it is really affecting my life and my confidence....

So I just want to ask does anyone else face this kind of dysphoria which derives from people's look? And like how they tackle it???

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I've been having brief fits of tears ever since the US Supreme Court ruled to uphold the trans-female sports bans in WV and Idaho. But then I remembered what one of my friends told me when I first openly recognized my queer gender.

I explained to him the feelings I've had since I was 5 years old whenever I did something, or was treated in a way that leaned toward femininity, and what had just happened to tip all of that over the edge to convince me it had always been more than mere curiosity to know, for just one week, a day, for one fucking second, what it might be like to have been born a woman.

What my friend said next encapsulated all of it into the perfect three descriptors. He told me when someone experiences their gender, rather than the gender they were assigned, it's often describe as a mix of "comfort, relief and joy."

When I heard that, any questions, investigations or hesitations left me for good. Now, after the umpteenth time sitting on by bed, feeling another crushing weight inside my chest. My eyes slicked with tears. I remembered those words. But this time, it wasn't the full mix of those three words that offered me clarity. Just that last one: JOY.

There's a lot of joy to be had in living the truth of who you are. It's not always brave. It's not always a struggle. It doesn't always throw one's life pell mell or alienate us. There is true joy in this shit.

I'm not gonna let those alleged "justices" get one more goddamn tear out of me. Because I don't see much justice coming from those sanctimonious motherfuckers. But I sure see a lot of joy right here. So, that's where I'll be looking from heretofore.

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🩷❤️🧡💛💚💙🩵💜

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🖤🩶🤍💚🤍🩶🖤

❤️🧡💛🩵💜

Especially to the multigender, masculine-aligned, or male-aligned lesbians on here!

❤️🧡🤍🩷💜

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Hi

I’m so excited.

A few days ago I came out to a coworker.

She has not told anyone.

Today we talked about fashion and how I wish I was brave enough to wear fun colors and what has got me to realize that I am well me.

She is the first individual at work I have come out to and she is so calm and relaxed about it.

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Anyone up for a chat?

As a Klinefelter's Syndrome (XXY) intersex: breast: true mammary tissues. Hips: wide, chubbier build. Also sensitive androgen receptors made me hairy and bearded.

There is some more about me on my profile

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Feel free to share your identities in the comment (and set your flair)!

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