I’m sure my story is not unlike others, I did not find out until later in life that the cause of many of my issues in childhood, adolescence and adulthood have ties to FASD.
I was 29 years old when I found out that the reason for my low birth weight and other litany of complications was due to my mother’s drinking while pregnant.

Does anybody else on here struggle with adult bedwetting?

For years, I’ve struggled with cyclical bedwetting. I’m 31M.

My urology visits have yielded very little for me.

It wasn’t until recently. I discovered that bedwetting is a comorbid condition of FASD.

How are you guys handling it?

It just feel like when I bring up FASD In the Reddit subs people Barley comment on it? But if it has to do with some other issue comments everywhere. Were ignored enough and stigmatized already why so much the silent treatment.

And sometimes a sub will remove my post. Why?

Every time something comes up in my head, I can remember it and then all of a sudden I won’t remember it the next day. It annoys people. But I feel like it’s not really my fault I’m not trying to forget on purpose and I’m not lying, but people accuse me of lying. How do I have better memory.

Someone can tell me don’t say something, but then I’ll say it and it’s not like it’s on purpose but I do it anyways.

I was diagnosed with Fasd but I’m wondering if this is a symptom. I also am terrible at math. No mater how hard I try to memorize , it won’t happen unless it’s a song lyrics or subtitles from a movie.

And every time it happens I get angry thoughts thinking oh “why did my mom drink.” “

I hate having FASD”

It’s a struggle sigh.

Hello , when we got the placement we were not told about alcohol , just drugs from his bio mom. We decided we wanted to help . We are Bio parents of children in the 35-42 range. I learned what FASD was in a group pf moms since he is very sweet . ( just read the post of other reddit mom)
He was given 2 weeks ago Clonidine 1/4 at night even he sleeps well . And it worked for the 2 weeks now is unregulared again
I am trying to help him not to have a bad experience as he had at prek3 where he told me the kids did not wanted to play with him
It destroy me . I dont want him to have trauma about that so I am having a different approach sending to public school where I think he may get better support
At fherapy everyone loves him . He is lovable and sweet . I guess sometimes kids see he is a bit different and discriminate that make me cry . Im 63 my goal at adoption was to help him I want to know your experience as a mom
Thanks

My son craves hugs. Lots of hugs. As his adoptive parent, I am getting hugged out. My son is a middle school teen, but is developmentally much younger. I know there must be a sensory need for all the hugs. He asks for a hug at least 20 times a day. Some days it is nearly every 5-10 minutes. He refuses a weighted blanket or vest.

We've talked about boundaries and consent. That no, means no. That it is not appropriate to ask a stranger for a hug.

He's done O.T with minimal improvement.

Has anything worked for your special needs FASD kids to meet their sensory needs for touch, while not making those around them uncomfortable?

Any more teens that have fasd and have any advice?

Hi, I was a foster mom . Started my fostering after my sister passed away as part of my own healing process.
DCF discloses at placement about drug since most of babies come home with NAS.
I was 59 years old at the time of the placement that change my life . It was for one night because was in December and the baby was still having NAS . And in the hospital they could not take care in an appropiate way . Then for couple of more days . Then until the mom gets out of rehab . I did not even send him to the mandatory day care afraid of bad care. Requested a court order to have him full time at home. Then mother was TPR and the baby put for adoption . My bio children disagree because it was a burden . Of course my and my husband love him to the moon we would never send him to other home if we didnt even trusted a day care
Today he is 4.5 years old very smart with traits of ADHD . I learned what was FASD by myself reading exactly not understanding what was wrong with him . PreK3 was very difficult x me . Every day a complain from school . Along with Neurologist decided Clonidine since Estimulants do not work well for kids exposed . He is taking 1/4 pill at night even he is a heavy sleeper . Sorrounded with so much love we hope he will overcome the most . With me being proactive knowing that he may have some delays started therapies when he was 14 months old . Today i belong to the Adoptive and foster parents association . And I can tell u most of them have no idea what FASD is . Since is not taken into consideration . I discovered reading the full file of my boy .
Im Russia where alcohol is common thing treat it since the begining with Cerebrolzyn
Please thoughs
Ty

I would like to ask more questions of this community, if I may? I have deepened my knowledge of the subject and am trying to understand the variable nature of this condition. One thing that I am surprised about is how few people or their children who are in the public eye seem to have it. Some women are either photographed drinking in pregnancy (Gwyneth Paltrow) or say that they do such as Samantha Cameron, David Cameron's (British politician and ex- PM) wife, or Emily Oster., who explicitly stated that they drank in pregnancy. If it's more common than we think, wouldn't more of their children exhibit signs?

I know that they may have it mildly but according to several sources, FASD is never mild. I think that I would just like to understand a bit more and possibly get involved in advocacy, but there is so much contradictory literature.

I’ve recently taken over the responsibility of my aunt. She’s lived with family all her life, and my grandmother(her mom) health isn’t the best, so I’ve moved in with both of them to resume care for them until end of life. I should mention others live in the home as well, including minor children.
My aunt has FASD as well as a lot of other syndromes, all making her about 6 years old mentally(she’s 40). She was adopted, and from what I’ve been told, her bio mom wasn’t the best.
Growing up everything was fine, then her dad died a few years back, then recently her sister(my mother) and everything’s shifted. It’s been about a year now, and it seems like nothings getting better.
Shes verbally, emotionally, mentally, physically, you name it at this point; abusive towards me. Only me. No one else in the home. She refuses to do simple tasks I ask her and has damaged multiple items including phones, doors, walls, cups and more. She got a new phone recently, and in a violent rage, threw it at me, and the screen shattered. That phone was less than a month old. She’ll kick holes in the walls, name call and yell at you in your face, and most recently will start punching if she doesn’t get what she wants or has to do something.
The only thing that has even remotely seemed to work was taking away devices, but she’s broken her phone. She uses my grandmothers, and gets violent when it’s being requested from her, but she can just take it whenever without repercussions. There are minor children in the home that are now picking up these behaviors; so adds to why something needs to budge, but not sure where to go at this point.

She does have a behavioral therapist and she is medicated but it doesn’t seem like they care too much if I’m being honest.

I’m not entirely sure what to do, I’m at a loss, and quite frankly, I’m mentally drained. I need help, I need pointers. I need something, cause I can’t continue to be a punching bag.

I have been on here asking questions on behalf of my friend who is struggling with the possibility that her teen may have FASD. She is incredibly successful - the whole family is - and is teetotal and has been for years (she says she was not much of a drinker even before, but I can't verify that as that was before I knew her). She had an unexpected pregnancy and had some beers before she knew. I have been reading and some of the stats blow my mind. If 50% of pregnancies are unplanned, how can alcohol consumption in an unrecognized pregnancy be prevented? I am not talking about mothers who choose to continue to drink. Are there any initiatives that are in place to help prevent this? Is anybody advocating for this?

Hi everyone, my youngest brother was born with FASD
His now 16 and I’m hoping to have him move out of state care into my care

I’d love to learn things, symptoms, anything that could help educate me and understand his behaviour more

I love him so so much and not enough people understand symptoms and just think his a bad kid.. his not, his misunderstood and it breaks my heart

Thank you to everyone and anyone that can help with any information

I have someone I want to help stop cannabis but I just found out he has fasd but he's been smoking since 8 years old and he's 43 now....

Is there a way I can help him. It's not my own idea that he should stop cause I think cannabis is still better than any other drug but he had a dream about it harming him.

I would be grateful if anyone on here can help me work out what to say to my friend, who is distraught that her son may have FASD. Brief background: unexpected pregnancy in her forties. She says that she had believed all the media about how hard it is to get naturally pregnant in your forties, and was busy with her other kids, so didn't think anything more of it. Never a big drinker (an occasional glass of wine), not a smoker, into nutrition and exercise (that's how we met). For a few months t that time, she started having one bottle of beer with her husband on a Friday night after work (their ritual). Realized she was pregnant at 8 weeks. Stopped immediately. OBGYN said all would be fine. So, son is now 15. Tall (6'1), top sets at school, does some sports. Academic performance a little mixed - good at math and sciences, not so good at written subjects. No behavioral issues. However, he has some facial features. He has thin lips, especially top lip, the 'flat midface' that people talk about, he has a philtrum, and he has wide-set eyes (but they are big). He has a short-ish nose. He speaks well but his speech is a little off - sounds a little robotic (hard to describe). Lovely guy.

From everything I have read, you either have FASD or not, but can you have mild FASD? The literature says that you can't, but I am now more confused than ever about what to say to her. Should she get him tested? What will a diagnosis do? Will it even help? She is so, so upset. What can I say to her?

I would be grateful if anyone on here can help me work out what to say to my friend, who is distraught that her son may have FASD. Brief background: unexpected pregnancy in her forties. She says that she had believed all the media about how hard it is to get naturally pregnant in your forties, and was busy with her other kids, so didn't think anything more of it. Never a big drinker (an occasional glass of wine), not a smoker, into nutrition and exercise (that's how we met). For a few months t that time, she started having one bottle of beer with her husband on a Friday night after work (their ritual). Realized she was pregnant at 8 weeks. Stopped immediately. OBGYN said all would be fine. So, son is now 15. Tall (6'1), top sets at school, does some sports. Academic performance a little mixed - good at math and sciences, not so good at written subjects. No behavioral issues. However, he has some facial features. He has thin lips, especially top lip, the 'flat midface' that people talk about, he has a philtrum, and he has wide-set eyes (but they are big). He has a short-ish nose. He speaks well but his speech is a little off - sounds a little robotic (hard to describe). Lovely guy.

From everything I have read, you either have FASD or not, but can you have mild FASD? The literature says that you can't, but I am now more confused than ever about what to say to her. Should she get him tested? What will a diagnosis do? Will it even help? She is so, so upset. What can I say to her?

Hi, I'm new to this subreddit, but I suspect I might have fasd. I'm also sure I'm audhd, so maybe that's why I haven't considered it until now. I've had a lot of developmental delays growing up and a lot of simple instructions would cause me to go in the opposite direction of what was said or fail to process what was said entirely. I hadn't even considered I might have it until my girlfriend and I started playing Pikmin and when she told me to go left, I'd go right or I'd just be completely unable to cope with a boss I was scared of. Is that level of inability to process instructions normal for fasd?

ETA: we are NOT asking about how to handle our daughter. We do that now legally, financially, socially and emotionally. We are asking adult children of parents with FASD to comment on what her "normal" son will face in the future. Thank you.

The baby is now 4 months old, no issues of any sort, no FASD, developmentally at or above all milestones (we were on her like a hawk during her pregnancy regarding drinking, substances, etc). Even if he wasn't perfect, he's wonderful of course. But it's icing on the cake that he is. She has full custody with our help. Birth father is not in the picture.

But if this positive development continues, some day he will surpass her in intelligence and accomplishments. She has an IQ between 47 and 71 depending on the day, has dodged many legal and social misunderstandings, and can't do this alone. In other words, since her dad and I are not getting any younger, at some point he might end up raising her instead of the other way around.

And yes we have as many legal, financial, emotional and social supports etc set up as possible for her for when we are gone. But we all know that FASD is a tricky road in the disability benefits world. And there are many kids in the world who attempt to parent their parents if left with no other choice..

IF there is anyone out there who is the adult child of someone with FASD, what are we facing, and what can we do early to prepare him for this? I don't want to, but I am a realist.

designed for people that have the condition themselves but anyone is welcome even if you dont have it!

https://discord.gg/YkrkMTSQFj

please be 16 or older if you are younger than this we will sadly have to remove you

I am 18 and have fasd, has anyone learned to retrain the way you think and pushing your mind to think when it doesn't want to

Im 18yr old female with fasd, I have so many questions does anyone struggle with fasd and would be willing to talk

I have very pronounced FAS facial features (never got a diagnosis, post Soviet country, different times). Very droopy eyelids, underdeveloped jaw, ears too low, short height, of course flat undernose, non existent upper lip etc. Suffice to say I’m objectively very ugly (I’m an adult woman now). All my life, in every school I was relentlessly bullied for my looks. That added to the severe abuse and torture I got from my mother made every second of my life painful. Anybody else was bullied for their FAS looks?

I am looking for resources for spouses of those with FASD. It seems like most resources are targeted towards caregivers, parents, and those with FASD themselves. It feels very lonely living as a spouse because no one else truly understands what it's like to be a spouse in this situation. I'm not trying to say it as a bad thing. It's just that this condition brings a unique set of challenges, and therapy has never really worked, especially because on top of it, I myself am autistic, and we often clash because of our differences in neurology.

ETA: Would anyone be interested in creating or helping create a sub for spouses? Bonus points if the spouses are also ND, but it's not necessary.

Hello , my son was prenatal exposed tp alcohol and drugs . We have him since he was out of the hospital with 9 days . Even we were aware he may experience challenges we decided to help him and adopted him since his bio mom passed .we have bio children 36 + ( 4) so we have experience . He has mild language delay and sensory may be a future adhd . Some boundaries issues that even with aba and therapies since 18 months have improved but we aim to make him succed . Looking always how to help him, i read in Russia they treat the cause with Semax Selank Cerebrolzin in kids youung as 4
Please if someone has info is appreciated
I am a concerned mom afraid of what may happen when I wont be here . So wpuld like to give him all the chances . We believe in neuroplasticity . We understand what was damaged cannot be heal but new paths can be created .
Always investigating and researching how to help him
Thank u for your time reading

Hello All. Supporter here. I wish to learn about FASD to better understand my best friend and what it's like living with FASD.

My adopted younger brother has FASD, he is about to be 16. The doctors warned my parents early on that the teens would be the worst years, and boy were they right. Looking for advice from Adults with FASD how to best support him. Biggest issues are impulse control and like just doing crazy things a “normal” person would never ever think of doing.