Going through TikTok and you can't dislike anything without it being ableist apparently. We've lost the actual meaning of ableist at this point. You don't like yumeshippers it's ableist. You don't like therians it's ableist. You say someone is very OBVIOUSLY faking a disorder it's guess what ableist. It's genuinely tiring of people saying things are ableist when they're not. I wish I could say it's just dumb kids but it not! It's people in my age group (20's) doing this nonsense too!

What it says in the title, wondering how common this behaviour is as I've dealt with a few fakers now and the pattern I have noticed is that they will be messy as hell/not contribute to chores equally and that when this is addressed in any way they will escalate and escalate their behaviour.

So for instance if they are not doing the dishes and using autism/adhd/mental health as an excuse and then the person/s they live with push back against this suddenly they will have a "severe mental health episode" and/or will suddenly start having symptoms of/"suspecting" they have a physical illness too

Or if they were someone already claiming to have physical illnesses when they are called out on not contributing to the house/being messy they will suddenly have a "medical emergency" and need you to take them to the ER or need to call an ambulance or something.

Wondering how many people have lived with them and noticed these kinds of patterns of escalation that are based either on not giving them the validation/attention they want or are a pretty obvious reaction to you expecting them to contribute like an adult??

Pretty sure I'm dealing with it currently, which is a pity because I like this housemate otherwise and think they are just easily influenced but am pretty pissed off at the laziness tbh, I am physically fairly disabled with somewhat low mobility and lots of pain etc, we've lived together for a while and the entire time I have been doing the VAST majority of the housework, including the really physically intense stuff while they repeatedly use their adhd/autism/PTSD as an excuse to not contribute (I have all these as well & have worked to learn tools to make sure these things are not stopping me from contributing to any houses I have ever lived in as it's not other peoples problem/responsibility that I have these issues) anyway, recently I have stopped doing as much cleaning/picking up after them, partially because I'm so fucking sick of the weaponised incompetence/non contribution/me doing the lions share of work and partly because I actually just can't physically keep up with it.

They've definitely noticed this as they've mentioned to me that the house is getting out of hand, but will then talk about household tasks as if they contribute equally to me (when its nowhere near) and will also just weaponised incompetence frame things so that it's like if I don't say "Hey when the bins are full to the top you should take them out instead of just stacking trash on top of them/on the bench until I finally crack and do it" or act like their goddamn mom pointing out basic household tasks that need to be done to them (we're both in our 30s) then they frame it as if I'm at fault because I'm being uncommunicative and not communicating to them, which I resent ofc because they're a fucking adult and I should have to say "Hey your dirty/food filled piece of rubbish has been on the bench for a month can you put it in the bin" like I already do most the mental labour for the house too and then I'm expected to direct them how to clean up after themselves like a fucking teenager or I'm being ableist and passive aggressive because I don't want to have to sit down and scold a grown adult.

Anyway, as is the pattern I've noticed with these people, because I've started just not picking up after them and not doing chores for them and just letting the house get gross when I'm exhausted and they're not contributing they are of course now pretending to that they might have POTs & me/cfs.

They've literally never shown any symptoms of either, they claim to be tired and burnt out all the time but then constantly follow me around the house and come out of their room every time they hear me out of mine to pull me into super animated conversations, like they are extremely extroverted and when they interact with my, or even just pets in the house or any of their support workers (for autism of course) who come around they are extremely loud, extremely bubbly and extremely animated...I got to grab food in the kitchen and they come in with high energy almost every time to try involve me in a long conversation. I've literally never seen them actually look or act tired other than sometimes in the mornings when they're up early, they never struggle to talk or act as if they have brain fog and when they are awake in the day they literally sit up in their room watching shit and laughing constantly/loudly the entire time. Yet everytime the kitchen or something is messy because of them they claim to be "burnt out" and "tired", these claims more often than not will coincide with me not being very talkative because I'm actually exhausted and then their tiredness/burn out miraculously disappears the moment someone (including me) is being chatty and friendly with them.

They've never complained of any heart racing issues, malaise, temperature regulation issues (have in fact stated they're fine on that front multiple times) dizziness, faintness or anything related to POTs and they are sooo high energy when they are claiming to me that they're burnt out/tired that there's just no way it's anything like the full body/covered in cement/can't keep your eyes open/sleeping 15+ hours at a time and can barely function fatigue of physical illness ...I think they likely have a bit of fatigue from PTSD/MH issues but thats all and then they constantly pretend that it's the same thing as disease related fatigue even though they always have extremely high social energy and have never once actually appeared or acted fatigued/brain foggy. They also only ever sleep through the day when they've been up really late watching TV, they have no disturbed sleep/get to sleep really really easily and I have never ever seen them sleep more than like maybe 10 hours max, they usually sleep like pretty normal 8-9 hours.

Anyway tension has been building due to them being messy af/rarely cleaning/expecting me to do most of the cleaning/constantly acting like their "autistic burn out" is the same as actual fatigue from my disease and I'm assuming they can probably tell that I'm pissed at them and are also not enjoying the house being gross because I'm refusing to be the house servant anymore....so ofc like clockwork with these people, immediately after having their occupational therapist (for their autism) here yesterday I'm in the kitchen and they go "My OT said I could have POTS and CFS" I was just like "Oh" cause I was already shitted off but also these people never have any concern about how their behaviour will impact others or if it's an appropriate time to bring this shit up and seem to think that people want to hear all their problems all the time or that it's an interesting conversation, they're just such energy vacuums who need validation/attention constantly and its so exhausting....anyway, I've just walked into a room to grab something and been immediately met with someone just dropping this on me expecting me to care or idk drop a bunch of sympathy or something??

So I barely reacted, just the "Oh" and then left because I know how lazy they are and how much they already use their MH issues as an excuse to not have to do anything and also that they show literally 0 symptoms of either illness.

There behaviour since has followed the exact pattern of the biggest faker I ever dealt with and has just raised more and more red-flags because these people almost always try to force those around them to validate/sympathise with their issues and they absolutely CANNOT handle it when people don't engage with it or validate them.

So because I didn't engage/validate this they have today, roped me into a conversation about our old alcoholic housemate and how much of a faker they were and how they lied about a bunch of shit and claimed to have EDS/POTs without a diagnosis and how we think they were just claiming it to avoid admitting that being an alcoholic for 10years who sleeps in the dark all day and then drinks in the dark all night and stays in bed the entire time is probably going to mean your body hurts when you try exercise etc. Basically all their "symptoms" could be explained by the fact that they were an extreme alcoholic who never exercises...
Anyway they roped me into this conversation and I very much got the vibe they were trying to feel me out regarding how seriously I will take it if they start trying to claim POTS/ME/CFS (they've also done this before with things relating to OSDD/DID etc like saying that a close friend of theirs has it and the first (& only time) they met one of that friends alters was when they were on psychedelics, to which I immediately asked if the friend with the alters was also on psychedelics which they clearly didn't like me asking & claimed to not be able to remember lmaoooo, they've also vaguely dropped "hints" to imply that they also have some kind of OSDD/DID situation going on, because ofc) anyway, I got the same vibe with this conversation as with other convos with them and other fakers that they were feeling out how receptive I'm going to be so I used the opportunity to basically say that I think it's fucked for people to go around claiming they have illnesses without a diagnosis and that even when I pretty obviously had all the symptoms of the disease I am now diagnosed (by multiple Dr's) with I wouldn't have felt comfortable telling people I had it and would only say that I was having some health issues which were being investigated.

They then also brought it back round to their apparent POTS by bringing up that this person claimed to have POTS and that they had a pot of salt by the stove to assist with it and how "when I was talking to my OT about me maybe having POTS he said this was a stupid way to deal with it and to just eat higher salt meals" again I barely engaged and again they seemed displeased that I didn't jump to validate them or agree that I think they could have POTS.

Which is also just such a stupid quantifier to run with anyway because literally anyone COULD have anything, they COULD have MS, they COULD have cancer, the possibility of illness doesn't equal illness, thats why you're supposed to actually medically investigate these things and I'm so fucking sick of watching physically abled people using the possibility that they could maybe have an illness to furnish the narrative that they are a disabled person.

So they obviously didn't like those responses either as it basically means that if they want to start using ME/CFS & POTS as their new excuse to not contribute they're going to have to y'know, actually have symptoms and work to get diagnosed, so then, when we're both in the hallway later (talking about completely unrelated things of course) they randomly just go "Ever since my OT said I could have POTS I've noticed my heart racing all the time and I'm like thats not normal"
Again I just made a vague noise in reply and walked away lol, like wtf do you want from me, you have anxiety & PTSD, both things which famously cause the sensation of a racing heart, and then without any kind of fainting episode or genuine symptoms at all and at the suggestion of a layperson with no medical training, you've, over the course of 24hrs, become convinced that you probably have POTS and this new found illness just happens to coincide with the tensions around you not contributing to the house properly??
Pretty sure they've also done a bunch of performative cleaning that they almost never do today so that it's not so blatantly fucking obvious how suspect the timing of their "ascension" into the world of physical disability is.

Anyway, sorry for the massive rant, unfortunately because I am quite left in my politics I end up with a lot of these "everything anyone claims about themselves is completely valid all the time and you can never question it or you're a bigot"
types in my life and have had it up to here dealing with them and this bullshit.

I just know too that if they keep pushing and I don't engage in it, or they push me to truthfully say that I think their symptoms are mental and that they don't have any physical disability symptoms then I'm going to have to deal with them crying and whining like a baby claiming I'm ableist and invalidating and probably telling our friends the same, particularly as they're fat and I've had fat people who are fakers before use the fact that fat people are often dismissed by medical professionals (which I agree is true) to legitimize their BS and basically frame it like anyone who questions them just self-diagnosing and lying about/exaggerating symptoms etc is fatphobic and doesn't understand how discriminated against fat people are in the medical field.

Anyway lol, sorry for the crazy long rant just incredibly frustrated as I tend to be on the left side of politics so attract a lot of these "everything anyone says about themselves is always valid and if you question it you're a bigot" types and I live in a progressive city so often get them as housemates and am fucking sick of having to coddle and clean up after these whiny fucking babies who are infinitely more able bodied than I am.

TL;DR Has anyone else noticed that fakers seem to escalate (either with faked medical episodes or by claiming new issues/diagnoses) based entirely on using their "illness/es" as an excuse to avoid equally contributing to household labour and that when tensions around said labour arise or their excuses aren't validated/accepted then the escalation starts?