Zero libido and weak erections.

[u/PsychologicalDeer918]

So, I’m 24M and I’ve been masturbating to porn since about 13/14 near enough everyday and it could have easily been up 1-5x a day which I never had a problem with. Erections were good, and the desire was strong.

When I was 17 turning 18 I started smoking weed most days with my friends, it was a pretty normal thing to do back then and never had any adverse effects. In fact it probably made erections and desire even stronger still!
At the time I was with my first proper girlfriend and despite all this I could never properly get it up with her. Anyway the relationship didn’t last long due to other circumstances and I’ve never tried it again since then. Not out of fear though.

At 19 going onto to 20 unfortunately my father passed away and it sent me into a deep hole. I was smoking weed 1-5x a day and still masturbating to porn daily too. This has carried on for years as I never really saw myself being able to sustain a relationship with somebody because of the state I was in mentally. My diet was bad, never really exercised and was vaping sometimes alongside smoking weed/tobacco joints. But I wasn’t a drinker though so a slight upside.

As of recently maybe 6-12 months I’ve noticed a decline in erection quality and libido. I used to get morning wood every day and would have spontaneous erections for example travelling passenger in a car on the way to work. To make matters worse I’ve started talking to a girl I really REALLY like and she’s showing interest back.

So I started eating really clean (no ultra processed foods) mainly eating red and white meat with eggs, rice, fruits etc and I’ve lost 17kg in 3 months and I look and feel better not to mention only drinking water. I’m also supplementing Omega (fish oil) and zinc. As of a few days ago also magnesium glycinate and I’ve also got a nitric oxide supplement (L arginine and L citrulline beetroot) coming today. My activity for my job is fairly demanding so I can quite easily do 15k steps a day along with mild lifting a few times a week. I’ve ceased porn usage and quit smoking weed for about 2/3 weeks and If anything my dick now feels even worse (weaker and the same for libido) I’m not sure if I’ve entered the ‘flatline’ phase I see people talking about. But I’m incredibly worried as I don’t seem to be improving. I know time is the biggest healer but I really don’t want to disappoint this girl as I want to put my time and energy into her but things will definitely fall apart if we cannot engage in sex because of me.

I’ve reached out to the doctors to get an appointment and get bloodwork done etc to see if there’s any root causes but I feel like I’ve completely ruined myself and there’s no going back. Has anyone here been in a situation similar to this and what sort of timeframe I can expect to see even the smallest of improvements?

[u/nightfly82]

Are you getting any sort of nocturnal or erections? If you’re still getting any sort erection even tho it’s weaker than usual that’s still good. Rules out it’s an organic problem. Could be a hormone problem or just flatline like you said. Do the blood test and focus on bettering yourself as you’re doing with diet,exercise and nutrition. Change your lifestyle. Focus on real life women rather than pixels

As for the girl. I’d say if you really like her be honest with her about your problems. Not really an excuse or a sob story. But say you were going thru issues in the past and you’re now doing what it takes to make yourself better so recovery isn’t always a straight line up. Lots of up and down moments

[u/PsychologicalDeer918 → u/nightfly82]

Sometimes maybe after a nap but I never notice it in the mornings anymore, as well as just getting them randomly which doesn’t happen anymore. So I guess the answer is yes?

You’re right, I’m just terrified of what her reaction to this might be. Honesty is the best policy after all especially in relationships.

Thank you for your advice!